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ndb
209 Posts |
 Posted - 09/04/2006 : 18:36:41
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quote:
Originally posted by Maryalma8
Icy, I am not new to TMS, I had this a year ago along with back issues. The problem is the wrist crap is back.
Keep me posted on how you do.
Hi Maryalma8,
I'm going to jump in if that's ok. You mentioned that you've been having trouble with the wrist for 4 months and its "killing you". Something that helped me is being totally objective about the pain. What I mean is...you know the wrist is TMS, you know its not harmful, you know that if you use it, its painful, but not doing any damage. Sure, maybe you feel it all day long...BUT, is it really bad enough to KILL YOU?
At some point after I read Sarno, and my primary shoulder pain subsided, I got really terrible jaw pain that made my whole face ache. I would get bad headaches, and swallowing or chewing would trigger waves of pain. Like you I thought, 'the pain is KILLING me, how am I going to live with this constant and terrible pain'. Then I realized I wasn't being entirely objective. The pain was badd, and interfered with almost every daily activity, but it wasn't really killing me. I just had to stop monitoring it constantly, and ACCEPT that it was there. This helped me with this symptom more than journalling or reading the book. I just did fun stuff to distract myself (going for hikes), and just stopped monitoring the level of pain, being anxious about it, or being sad that it was still there.
I know that when you said its killing you, its just a figure of speech, but just wanted to say, that at some level, maybe you are quite anxious about it, and this is perpetuating it.
hope I didn't sound like I was lecturing, if what i said is not quite what you are feeling!
best,
ndb
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Edited by - ndb on 09/04/2006 18:38:07 |
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marytabby
USA
545 Posts |
Posted - 09/05/2006 : 03:46:54
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No NDB this is very helpful to hear. Thanks for the suggestion.
I am quite occupied with the pain for sure. I think I need to find better things to do to occupy my mind than to obsess on this. |
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ndb
209 Posts |
Posted - 09/05/2006 : 08:33:13
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quote:
Originally posted by Maryalma8
I think I need to find better things to do to occupy my mind than to obsess on this.
Awesome...I hope it passes soon.
best,ndb |
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armchairlinguist
USA
1397 Posts |
Posted - 09/05/2006 : 12:49:48
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Icy,
Great to hear you are seeing improvement! That's a terrific sign and I hope it continues. Best to you.
--
Wherever you go, there you are. |
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sonora sky
USA
181 Posts |
Posted - 09/05/2006 : 15:43:50
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Good news, Icy! Just keep doing what you're doing!  Keep us posted!
Best,
ss |
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Penny
USA
364 Posts |
Posted - 09/06/2006 : 15:06:49
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quote:
Originally posted by IcyScythe
Also, does anyone know of a TMS practitioner in South Carolina, or fail that, North Carolina or Georgia? I didn't see any anywhere close to me listed on Dr. Schecter's website.
I'm in North Carolina. Couldn't find a TMS doctor here, BUTTTTT the good news is you don't need a TMS doc to get well. Since you are already in a doctor's care, they've ruled out the other things that could cause pain.
Here's my story in a nuttyshell: I was DXed with Carpal Tunnel 10 years ago and struggled on and off til a couple months ago. (I'm a writer and flute player.) A couple months ago they gave me splints and bands and told me I had "severe nerve damage and needed surgery" to correct it and stop the pain. They also wanted to inject me with meds. My fibro kicked in BIG time right after this news and ironically distracted me from the stabbing pain and numbness I constantly had in my hands and wrists. I am now thankful for the fibro, otherwise I would've had the surgery unnecessarily.
I researched fibro and found Sarno (thank GOD) and looked at the times in my life when the CTS and FMS were there worst and saw a correlation of different stressors (e.g. family obligations, birth of children, new financial situation etc.) and my perfectionist persona and at long last discovered the culprit ALL MY LIFE has been TMS. My CTS is completely resolved. Sometimes I get pins and needles in my sleep which I attribute to dreams my brain doesn't want me recognizing, as I wake up COMPLETELY focused on my hands and not what I was dreaming about. (Rmember the brain creates the physical symptom as a distraction to the emotion.)
Some days are better than others, but I know I'm on the right track and that the pain (and anxiety) will not kill me. When I get the pain I tell my brain to send oxygen to the area of pain, and to knock it off. I think about TMS and have acknowledged some of my uglies about jealousy and anger (that I've NEVER allowed myself to have in my life til now). This is a work that will continue beyond my TMS symptom resolution.
I wish you lots of healing and hope you can find the strength to be honest with yourself to tackle your uglies. You are on the right path ... not necessarily the easiest one ... but this team here will help you! You are not alone.
>|< Penny
Non illigitamus carborundum. |
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marytabby
USA
545 Posts |
Posted - 09/06/2006 : 17:34:21
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Penny,
How did you come about realizing what the jealousies and angers were? What lightbulb finally turned on over your head?
I ask because I am encouraged by your posting.
Mary |
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Penny
USA
364 Posts |
Posted - 09/06/2006 : 20:20:30
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quote:
Originally posted by Maryalma8
Penny,
How did you come about realizing what the jealousies and angers were? What lightbulb finally turned on over your head?
I ask because I am encouraged by your posting.
Mary
Hi Mary,
At the risk of sounding like "Sybil" (schizophrenic sp?) I share this with you  But I preface by saying I don't know EXACTLY what they are, b/c they are in my unconscious, but I've been hazarding to guess.
I started asking myself a difficult question: What could my unconscious (inner child) be thinking in this situation? One example is the other night I gave my husband a larger piece of cake than I gave myself. Now, consciously I felt good about it: He's the love of my life, he should have a bigger piece, he deserves a bigger piece. BUT was my unconscious in agreement ... probably not. She may have been thinking "NO!!! Dam*it! I want the bigger piece!!!! I work harder, I like cake more than he does! I should get the bigger one. BOO bloody HOO!!!!"
This sounds silly, and perhaps a seemingly insignificant example of an action I have done all my life: Not putting myself first, not feeling WORTHY of taking the larger piece. BUT after 35 years of this, it's probably this type of tiny little put-down that has added up to all my physical problems.
To practice this, I ask myself through out the day, WWMICD? (What would my inner child do). Is she upset by this? Could she be jealous? I don't necessarily have to bow to my inner child and give her what she wants, but just the acceptance that she has feelings ALL the time that are constantly overlooked and probably in opposition to my daily actions has helped me come to terms with some new feelings of inadequacy.
I have NEVER allowed myself to be jealous or angry person. VERRRRY rarely in my entire life b/c I believe these emotions are limiting and unproductive: Those emotions are not part of my emotional output. But the fact is, these are two very real emotions that even Buddha and Jesus probably felt. We--like them--are human, and jealousy and anger are part of the human experience. I know that these emotions are in me, I've just never expressed them. Perhaps repressing and denying them is the root of my problems? Just the act of proposing that I could be jealous or angry about certain small AND large things in my life has opened up some things to me. I'm not sure how much of the TMS has been healed by this, but I've certainly tapped something liberating. I won't stay in this analysis mode forever b/c that would be equally unhealthy, but for now, analysis on these two emotions has been very helpful. (or should I say 3, the third being inadequacy) I've only been doing it for a few days now, but I've spent many hours considering and journaling.
Other possible examples
Getting out of bed in the morning to make the family breakfast and get kids to school. WWMICD?  stay in bed til hunger, thirst or bathroom made getting out absolutely necessary.
Letting my husband watch his show when I wanted to watch something on PBS. WWMICD? Pull the plug on the TV so no one can watch anything ... OR rattle him and get in a fight by insisting and over reacting so I get my own way.
I'm sure you catch my drift. I hope this was as helpful to you as it was to me to write. It just makes so much sense to me now, all of a sudden. It gets clearer and clearer.
If you ask yourself this (WWMICD), I'd love to hear what you come up with. That would make me feel less of a freak for sharing my brain matter 
>|< Penny
Non illigitamus carborundum. |
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armchairlinguist
USA
1397 Posts |
Posted - 09/07/2006 : 10:57:08
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Hi Penny,
I do something very like what you described. If I feel confused/deadened/inexplicably tired/any TMS pain symptom/a twinge of unexpected emotion (these are the harbingers of repressed emotion for me), I try to think about how I would feel in the situation if I were my inner child.
Alarm goes off for work, I'm feeling bizarrely exhausted? The IC wants to stay in bed.
I spend some time listening to a friend or loved one talk about their problems, and the next day my neck is sore? The IC wants to talk about ME ME ME.
I love your example about the cake. I do that too, I give the bigger half or the last bite te someone else. And the IC wants it.
It's been really enlightening and liberating to me to acknowledge that I have all these crazy feelings. I think it's important for us all to do that -- be aware of and experience (to the extent possible) the feelings. But we don't have to act on them, at least not toward the people and in the situation. It doesn't make us bad people just to have the feelings -- just normal -- which is a really relieving thing to know.
--
Wherever you go, there you are. |
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miehnesor
USA
430 Posts |
Posted - 09/07/2006 : 12:16:46
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| Penny- I have also found the IC work to be the key to my TMS symptom reduction and to other benefits to my life as well. It is IMO an incredibly powerful tool for attacking TMS especially persistant TMS that does not yield to the first line of attack of accepting the symptoms and not fearing them. Its slow but it works because it acknowledges the unconscious and in time reveals the secrets of the unconscious. |
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Penny
USA
364 Posts |
Posted - 09/07/2006 : 12:49:03
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For those of you IC/Id pros, do you know if the IC in us is anything but a greedy, self centered, glutonous (sp), narcisist? I just wondered if she has any redeeming qualities that are NOT self serving alike my those conscious possesses: e.g. kindness, thoughtfulness, nurturing etc. Right now I only identify the first list for my IC ... just wondered if this is inline with Freud. I've been reading TDM and other Sarno books, but I think I've read too much as I can't remember.
Another question: What is our alter ego? Is that another word for Id?
>|< Penny
Non illigitamus carborundum. |
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armchairlinguist
USA
1397 Posts |
Posted - 09/07/2006 : 14:29:24
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I don't know for sure if Sarno thinks that the inner child has "positive" qualities, or what they are, but I do remember in MBP that he said he wasn't listing all the qualities of the IC, just the ones that cause problems, so I'm guessing there are some other unconscious feelings, not just those that provoke TMS attacks.
One thing that can be helpful to remember is that the IC is not really a child; it's just useful to think of it that way. It has a lot of emotions that we associate with children, because those are the parts of ourselves that we repress (being that they're not considered appropriate for grownups). But I think there's plenty that we repress that isn't necessarily childish. One good example would be sexual attraction. It's a strain of "not getting what you want" ("getting what you want" being a childish desire) but it's not a feeling a child would have.
Also, a lot of the things Sarno touches on that can cause rage, like sadness and loss, are not really "negative". Being able to feel sad and lonely and lost is not a good or fun feeling, but it comes from our capacity for caring and desire to connect, something I think we sometimes repress along with the sadness and loss it brings.
So basically I guess I don't think that the IC -- the unconscious -- is just a "greedy, self-centered, gluttonous narcissist". The unconscious is the part of us that we don't acknowledge, whether that part is selfish or tender, angry or sexual. It probably differs from person to person, too!
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Wherever you go, there you are. |
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Bonnie
Canada
33 Posts |
Posted - 09/08/2006 : 12:09:40
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Penny, you asked if there were postive things from the Inner child, I think the inner child is also the magical innocent part of ourselves that looks at the world and sees the magic in the world that the adult will no longer allow themselves to see. I think a lot of writers and artist, if they're honest, will admit that it's the inner child who dictates a lot of what we write or draw or paint, it's that part of you that hasn't been boxed in yet by the big bad institutionalized world where everything and everyone has to toe the same line. I believe it's not just having the biggest piece of cake, although that's there too, or being angry and feeling judged when someone doesn't like what you've written or tried to do, it's also that ability to cut throught the bull**** and see clearly the way children do, to the chagrin of their parents. They haven't been socialized to lie or turn a blind eye to the truth. I think there is a part of us that knows how unrealistic our lives and actions and habits have become, how trapped in joining the party and spouting the party line, keeping up to the Joneses in so many things that don't matter, and we're denying it with every breath and paying the price for it with our pain. Allowing ourselves to see clearly is imperative, not to act if it's not appropriate, but to see clearly, is essential to healing and that means acknowledging that child that has been so desperately depressed and locked away while we try to be what society demands we be. It started at home and continued in school where we were locked into our little ticky tacky boxes and expected to be just like everyone else, so of course that still small voice inside us is furiously angry that he or she has been ignored and discounted. And we are missing the magic, not seeing the beauty and sweetness and joy around us.
Just my opinion.
Bonnie |
Edited by - Bonnie on 09/08/2006 12:10:57 |
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sonora sky
USA
181 Posts |
Posted - 09/08/2006 : 16:01:38
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Thanks Bonnie and acl, I think you're right on about the IC. Bonnie, your post reminded me of my husband. I often think of him as having many child-like (not child-ish) qualities that I so admire. I'm greatful that they have in turn brought out these qualities that I was neglecting in myself. It was such a surprise to see that these magical qualities were still there inside me--I thought they were long gone. But it feels so great to just be silly, goofy, spontaneous, and intuitive from time to time--things I haven't allowed myself to do for years. I really yearn for this release from straight-laced adulthood. Deep down I wish I could be an artist (pure childlike creativity) instead of an (analytical) art historian.
ss |
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miehnesor
USA
430 Posts |
Posted - 09/08/2006 : 17:59:22
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quote:
Originally posted by Penny
For those of you IC/Id pros, do you know if the IC in us is anything but a greedy, self centered, glutonous (sp), narcisist? I just wondered if she has any redeeming qualities that are NOT self serving alike my those conscious possesses: e.g. kindness, thoughtfulness, nurturing etc.
For sure the IC has the above mentioned qualities but if you want to get the most out of IC work you have to view the IC in a much different light IMO. Think of the IC as a real child. What would you as an adult say to the child that would provide protection, comfort, love, support, understanding, help for her aloneness etc. etc. Imagine what the child needs and then give it to the child. Just a little bit every day is all that is needed. Go into this dialog with the intent to learn the secrets that the IC is holding on to. The IC of a person who has TMS has a lot of repressed feelings and pain for sure. They are waiting for someone to notice them and value their feelings. They will eventually come out and it will not feel very good but it will be the real thing and you will feel relief in the connection. |
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HilaryN
United Kingdom
879 Posts |
Posted - 09/09/2006 : 10:43:42
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Penny,
I just read your WWMICD? (What would my inner child do) post and I loved it. Thanks for sharing it.
Hilary N |
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IcyScythe
USA
11 Posts |
Posted - 09/16/2006 : 22:53:24
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Well about 3 weeks in... my wrists still hurt. Like I said I think it has subsided slightly. But I stress slightly. I'm kinda worried again that I'm not going to recover. It's hard to stay positive. I tried playing guitar today for the first time in a year and a half. Went alright I guess. I played for an hour or so. Painful, albeit slightly less than before.
Anyone got any more tips? I read Sarno 30 pages everyday and journal for about 15 minutes a day. How much longer is this going to go on? I'm so tired of having to put up with this. My knee and back pain also started acting up at rugby practice today (just started).
Also... something interesting: About a week ago some teeth in my jaw started hurting whenever I swallow or eat something even slightly cold. I did have a tooth repaired back there so that might be it... or maybe it's TMS...?? |
Edited by - IcyScythe on 09/16/2006 22:55:40 |
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HilaryN
United Kingdom
879 Posts |
Posted - 09/18/2006 : 13:51:25
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Icy,
Don't be discouraged. It can take a while.
Hilary N |
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armchairlinguist
USA
1397 Posts |
Posted - 09/18/2006 : 16:11:57
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Icy,
It sounds like you may be entering the phase of TMs where it moves around to different places and may even seem to get worse. Keep up the work and try to dig deeper if you can, because you're probably headed the right direction.
--
Wherever you go, there you are. |
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Penny
USA
364 Posts |
Posted - 09/18/2006 : 18:40:06
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quote:
Originally posted by IcyScythe
Also... something interesting: About a week ago some teeth in my jaw started hurting whenever I swallow or eat something even slightly cold. I did have a tooth repaired back there so that might be it... or maybe it's TMS...??
Hi Icy, The day I had my first pyschoT appt, I had stabbing pain in my jaw on my toothline. I nearly cancelled my appt to go see a DDS instead, then I remembered symptom imperative!!!! My subc was trying to divert me --aha! Yes, I bet that's what you've got going on. I went to therapy and it lessened. By next day it was barely there.
You're onto your subconscious and it doesn't like it so it's throwing some curve balls to try to distract you. Whatever you're doing, keep it up! Talk to it, tell it to stop, tell it you know what it's doing! You're winning!
>|< Penny
PS If your tooth falls out or is loose, see a DDS 
Non illigitamus carborundum. |
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Topic |
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Tendonitis/RSI in both hands/wrists
