| Author |
 Topic  |
|
plum
United Kingdom
641 Posts |
 Posted - 01/22/2013 : 05:55:13
|
I'm sure we're all familiar with the idea that it takes 21 days to make or break a habit. Like many here I really appreciate and value the superb keys to healing created by Ace1. There are 25 of them which nicely takes us over that threshold.
I think they're so good that I propose posting one each day in the spirit of savouring them fully. Hopefully it'll allow us to focus on each point rather than gallop through the list, (a tendency in contradiction to the whole thing that I just did!)
I hope you don't mind Ace1.
Here's the first key:
1. Try to be aware of all internal reactions through your day.
|
Edited by - plum on 01/22/2013 07:57:34 |
|
|
Sylvia
199 Posts |
Posted - 01/22/2013 : 07:19:01
|
This is a great idea. But you know me and my emails, I never get them. Would you allow comments everyday about the days list? If so, maybe you can supersize or colorize the Ace of the Day.
If you'd like no responses, please do respond and I'll erase my message.
|
 |
|
|
plum
United Kingdom
641 Posts |
Posted - 01/22/2013 : 07:38:48
|
Thanks Sylvia. I'd love comments, the more the merrier. My hope is that this will be a good way of focusing on each key such that we can address problems and joy-of-joys, things that really help and work for us.
I'm posting on my phone at the moment and it refuses to play ball with the jazzy stuff but soon as I get home, I'll amend the Ace of the Day (how cool is that. The boy is fast-tracking to legend). |
|
|
|
plum
United Kingdom
641 Posts |
Posted - 01/22/2013 : 08:02:30
|
Sylvia, you're an inspiration.
I changed the post on my phone with the aid of some tired html knowledge. Hope I haven't fluffed it.
Name of this post is credited to you my dear. |
|
|
|
shawnsmith
Czech Republic
2048 Posts |
Posted - 01/22/2013 : 08:10:51
|
It's funny, because I was thinking about doing the same thing with commentary, but you beat me to it Plum. Good show!
I do believe that being aware of your internal reactions to things is very important because sometimes we react to people and situations without even reflecting upon why we reacted that way. For example, someone says something to us and we get annoyed or angry and we lash out even though what was said was so trivial when you think about it. Or you are standing in a line or caught in traffic and you become filled with anxiety or frustration and you start muttering under your breath or honking the horn and even saying the f-word without even thinking why you are making such a big fuss. This person turns me on, that person repulses me. I cannot believe he said that and I think that person was rude. On and on and on it goes, all day long without even a moment of cessation.
As Ace1 recommended, try to be aware of these internal reactions, not with a view to changing or stopping them, but just to become aware. I mean fully aware. Observe your thoughts and feelings as you would a cloud floating by -- they come and they go. When you become aware then you can be more conscious of why you behave the way you do. |
|
|
|
bryan3000
USA
513 Posts |
Posted - 01/22/2013 : 09:02:03
|
| Count me in as a happy reader. Maybe Ace will have a chance to comment here and there as well. Great idea. |
|
|
|
Sylvia
199 Posts |
Posted - 01/22/2013 : 09:03:01
|
Aw Shucks Plum, ya got me blushing.
I sure will enjoy this thread, a useful daily focus. |
|
|
|
Ace1
USA
1040 Posts |
Posted - 01/22/2013 : 11:02:07
|
| Thanks guys, I'm glad this list is helping you all as these techniques were what I needed to get better. I (as Im sure you all did) had questions that I didnt know the correct answer (should I challenge or not, do I have to change, is it something that is so deep in my mind that I may never figure it out) It took me a while through trial and error to figure these things out as most people and books did not know how to answer these questions. The hardest thing is when a book source has a lot of truth in it, but it is not entirely correct or complete, as with Dr. Sarno's books. In the patients I have helped and whom have read Dr. Sarno's books, not a one who got better took his words literally, but worked more on an approach similar to what is listed in my keys. People who have severe TMS take words literally and dont stray away from that since thats how their mind operates and this keeps them stuck if they read Dr. Sarno's books alone. On the other hand, if the TMS is not severe, its enough to just know its somehow mind realated, so they stop straining or being afraid that something is wrong with them and thats enough to get them better. So, yes, I think its good that you guys discuss each one and I'll chime in occasionally. I think everyone on this board can get better with these keys as long as they make it the first project in their lives and continue with it for as long as needed. Also try to prove to yourself what I am saying is accurate through deductive reasoning instead of just believing it, that way you cant fall into the trap of blindly believing. |
Edited by - Ace1 on 01/22/2013 11:06:06 |
|
|
|
plum
United Kingdom
641 Posts |
Posted - 01/22/2013 : 11:27:07
|
shawnsmith, great minds and all that. *smiles*
I think your commentary will prove invaluable, as nicely demonstrated here by your suggestion to simply be aware. It made me realise how I don't do that even though I thought I did. I'm actually jumping on and judging certain thoughts or feelings or sensations relentlessly.
This is daft example but our toilet seat broke this morning and here I am in full Plum'll fix it mode. (Never ever considered myself a fixer before. A listener, a helper but not fixer.) Then the f**kin thing won't budge because it's rusted on and instead of becoming a sweary mary I've downed tools and am writing this. And then I'll find someone to do it for me. A little mindfulness saves the bad mood.
A second example. We have snow and in England snow = chaos. The whole country loses its marbles (remember that Andy?). So my better half is driving, this is rare in itself, and the car slides at one point and my nervous system rears up and it occurs to me a few moments later that what I felt could have been excitement, not fear. We were perfectly safe really. Then I thought, I miss feeling excited. This whole pain game has seen me render my life small and frankly a bit boring (self-evident given I just wrote about changing a loo seat.)
As I say, silly examples but how many times a day do I go down mazes like this?
Ace1, Thanks for your support of this. It really helps to hear we have to make the healing path our own and to prioritise it. |
|
|
|
shawnsmith
Czech Republic
2048 Posts |
Posted - 01/22/2013 : 11:50:06
|
| There is one other "reaction" we don't ponder over enough and which Ace1 touches on in his later keys. I am speaking, of course, to the reaction we have towards our symptoms. What are we thinking and saying about our symptoms? Are we filled with fear and dread? What words do we use when describing our symptoms? What thoughts go through our minds when the symptoms become more intense? |
|
|
|
plum
United Kingdom
641 Posts |
Posted - 01/22/2013 : 12:11:03
|
| Again, yes. Fear and dread and some terrible explanation for it all, of the 'surely they missed something' variety. I can lay claim to that today. |
|
|
|
chickenbone
Panama
398 Posts |
Posted - 01/22/2013 : 13:29:22
|
| I have been working on Ace1's keys to healing also. I keep reading and rereading them. I am happy to say that I have made a lot of progress on this first one. During the day, I just try to always be very aware of what my internal feeling/reactions are to daily events. I do sometimes slip up and suddenly find myself lost in some negative neural circuit within my brain. I try not to get into arguments with myself over weather these reactions/feelings are constructive or valid. Often, late at night, when the day is over and I am feeling very peaceful, I go over some of my more destructive emotional reactions and try to understand why that sort of thinking does not serve me well. I also always try to see the mind/body pain connection, how one thing leads to another. This has helped me to cut off negative tapes that go through my mind before they have run the full gambit of neural circuitry all the way to creating the pain. The more I am able to successfully short circuit the negative feedback loops, without suppressing the emotions or using intensive distractions, the better I feel and the less pain I experience. |
|
|
|
Sylvia
199 Posts |
Posted - 01/22/2013 : 13:50:09
|
OK, laugh if you like, here goes.
To get myself out of my head and into my heart, I imagine myself as the little mouse king alien thing that was in Men In Black, but I drive my body around from inside my chest and not my head. |
|
|
|
bryan3000
USA
513 Posts |
Posted - 01/22/2013 : 13:59:01
|
Self-awareness is critical no matter which healing method we choose, imo. I love Ace's approach, which strikes me as a combination of the greats like Claire Weekes and Sarno, but with some other bases covered that will be of great to many.
Once we start to really catch ourselves in mid-thought throughout the day, what we find is almost shocking. Of course, meditation can be a great way to find this out if you haven't already. (Sit with your breath for 10 minutes and look at the ridiculous things your mind gets up to.) But, as the day goes on... we find ourselves in a constant state of fear, judgment, longing, analysis, etc. It's normal for all of us, and yet... the crux of so many problems if the thought processes aren't balanced.
|
|
|
|
chickenbone
Panama
398 Posts |
Posted - 01/23/2013 : 17:03:42
|
Sylvia, I love your analogy of the little mouse. I have lived my life way too driven from my head and it has not served me well. I constantly strive to drive my life from my heart. Thanks, can I borrow it?
|
|
|
|
plum
United Kingdom
641 Posts |
Posted - 02/18/2013 : 01:55:22
|
Seems so simple doesn't it? Undoubtedly you will relate to this but when the pain is bad it feels as if I am doing nothing but being aware of internal reactions. On reflection I'm not sure this is completely true. I find I am actually aware of my resistance to the pain and to my story of it. Given that these aspects are the subject of later keys I shan't explore them deeply here; the invitation is to be aware, to focus on your reactions not sensations. Thought precedes feeling, in that I set myself up by providing an explanation ahead of the pain. It's a rolling thing and very hard to determine just when the pain narrative really kicked in; when did the pain-body begin speaking in tongues? These are fine points and all I can say with conviction is that the pain cycle totally mashed my perception of this.
I'm getting better at focusing on my mental and emotional reactions. Classic examples are negative internal talk and the most ludicrous mental pictures that have been pretty relentless. I used to fight them. I don't now, I let them wash over and through me. I have to give full credit to Claire Weekes here because her words are pure light in a fear-drenched darkness.
I think it's worth noting that the nervous system not only fights and flees but freezes too. It's a lesser known and acknowledged survival imperative. Hence we can turn our emotions off and depersonalise, as is common with trauma especially. I'd say remember that this absence of reactions or feelings is a reaction in itself. Nothing is Something. In this place, I've allowed the dark, deep quiet to be the reaction until resistance softens.
In sum this key opens the door marked 'Fascination.'
It's a natural way of starting to make peace with your pain and your mind and your body. Remember this peace is our natural state and by turning to face the demon, we see it for what it is: a kid in a Halloween costume. Trick or Treat. Tricks are the mind games we play with ourselves. Treats are the tangible boons of freedom from refusing to play said games anymore.
(and I can count. There were 25 to begin with. Ace1 slipped a couple in there at the end and I'm glad he did because they're good 'uns.) |
Edited by - plum on 02/18/2013 02:50:39 |
|
|
|
shawnsmith
Czech Republic
2048 Posts |
Posted - 02/18/2013 : 04:53:58
|
Today, I am posting Chapter 2 of "Mind Power in the 21st century" by John Kehoe. Ace1 bases his keys to healing directly on this book. Please read the chapter carefully as it relates to key #1:
Consciousness
The beginning step to a new and more successful life is absurdly easy. You have only to pay attention to the flow of thoughts inside your mind and direct it accordingly. Your life is entirely of your own making, so look at the way you are living. You claim you want financial abundance, yet you are constantly bemoaning your lack of money and how expensive things are. You dwell on what you don't have and the bills coming in. You worry and wonder how you will get along. You may want financial abundance, but because your consciousness is of lack and worry, you will never experience that abundance. Or maybe you wish you could find a new job, something interesting and challenging that would use your creativity and pay you well. If you constantly tell yourself these jobs are impossible to find, that it will never happen, it is very un-likely it ever will happen.
Perhaps you wish you could be a more outgoing individual, bold and spontaneous, full of assurance and confidence, yet if you constantly focus on your inferiorities and inadequacies and put yourself down, reminding yourself again and again of your problems, you are not likely to become that type of person. You may want strength, but if your consciousness is of weakness, you are fooling yourself to think you will ever possess that strength. In short, wanting something badly will not make it happen.
Hoping for something different will have no effect. Simply working hard, even if it's twelve to fifteen hours a day, is not enough. You will always remain where you are unless—and it's a big unless— you change your thinking.
"To them that hath ... more shall be given. To them that hath not, even what little they have will be taken away." —Luke 19:26
When I first read this quote I didn't think it was fair. It didn't seem fair that "them that had" would get more and "them that had not" would lose what little they had. It just didn't seem right. I thought it would be more just if "them that had not" were given more, but that is not what the Scripture says. This, according to the Bible, is not the way the universe works. But then, upon reflection, I realized that it was indeed fair. In fact what could be more fair than every person's freedom to choose for himself or herself thoughts which will, in turn, create their reality? There is great fairness in the complete freedom to determine the quality of one's life.
Want to change your circumstances? Develop the necessary consciousness. A successful person has a success consciousness. A wealthy person has developed a prosperity consciousness, and his thoughts are on abundance, success and prosperity. This is how he thinks. "Easy for him," you say. "When you're successful it's easy to think success, and when you're wealthy it's easy to think prosperity, but my situation is totally different. I'm not successful; I'm not wealthy. The situations and circumstances of my life keep me down."
WRONG!
Dead wrong Your circumstances and situations never keep you down. The only things that keep you down and keep you stuck are your thoughts. With work and practice you can learn to direct your thoughts and create any consciousness you choose. Your reality will change only after you've developed your new consciousness, not before.
The new consciousness must come first. What is it that you want in your life? Do you know? More health? Then get health consciousness. More power? Then get power consciousness. More prosperity? Get prosperity consciousness. More happiness? Get happiness consciousness.
More spirituality? Get spiritual consciousness. Everything exists as a possibility. All that's required is for you to feed in the necessary energy until your objective becomes yours. How reassuring it is to think that no matter what a person's past or present situation, no matter how many times he or she has previously failed, if that person would but regularly feed his or her consciousness, his or her situation would change!
This remarkable ability has been given to each and every one of us to use or to ignore. It costs no money
.
It takes no special talent. It takes only the decision on your part to take the time and put forth the necessary effort to develop the appropriate consciousness. That's all!
Everything else will automatically fall into place. Your mind is like a garden which can be cultivated or neglected, and you are its master gardener. You can cultivate this garden, or you can ignore it and let it develop whatever way it will. But make no mistake: you will reap the harvest of your work or your neglect!
Your mind creates your reality. You can choose to accept this or not. You can be conscious of it and set your mind working for you, or you can ignore it and allow it to work in ways that will hinder and hold you back. But your mind will always and forever be creating your reality.
|
Edited by - shawnsmith on 02/18/2013 04:58:41 |
|
|
|
RageSootheRatio
Canada
430 Posts |
Posted - 02/18/2013 : 06:16:22
|
I'd just like to add another something to your thought here, Plum:
quote:
I think it's worth noting that the nervous system not only fights and flees but freezes too.
In addition, I have also heard of a fourth: FAWN. This term was coined by therapist Pete Walker:
quote:
I have named it the fawn response...the fourth ‘f’ in the fight/flight/ freeze/fawn repertoire of instinctive responses to trauma. Fawn, according to Webster’s, means: “to act servilely; cringe and flatter.”
I think this speaks to a perhaps more extreme manifestation of "People-pleasing" (if thinking about TMS from Dr Sarno's idea that 1/3 of one's "stress beaker" is personality-related) and it CERTAINLY would be mentally straining, if thinking about it re Ace1's mental strain model. (AND it can certainly be an "unconscious" / automatic part of how we relate to other people, which can be pretty enraging, actually!)
RSR |
|
|
|
plum
United Kingdom
641 Posts |
Posted - 02/18/2013 : 06:19:31
|
Far out. That rings some bells.
Do you have the full reference to hand?
|
|
|
|
shawnsmith
Czech Republic
2048 Posts |
Posted - 02/18/2013 : 06:57:38
|
I want to keep this thread focused on the specific key, which is trying to be aware of all internal reactions through your day. This is calling on us to make a conscious note of how we respond inwardly to all the things that happen to us or people we interact with throughout our day, which is something we don't normally do. Why do you think that Ace thinks that this key is important to healing? Ace is not referring to the unconscious, but things that we can become really aware of if we pay close attention to them.
Discuss.... |
Edited by - shawnsmith on 02/18/2013 07:34:03 |
|
|
|
eric watson
USA
601 Posts |
Posted - 02/18/2013 : 09:50:39
|
the importance of this quote about being aware of your internal reactions-is just that; awareness-when you can get to the point that
your aware of your inner thoughts of anger and distress ,then you can catch them like a fish and reframe the thought then.then later if that thought arises it wont be so hard to reframe if you have to and also if it even comes back up-
also another reason for our etenal reactions is just that,most reactions we have are negative ,if you can react in a joyful way and break that negative reaction then your well on your way to understanding this key and how powerful it really is.
another reason for being aware of your internal reactions is we
often say things that when thought of later we wish we would have never looked at it like that.-by being aware of the words or thoughts were about to have about an event or anything reall,we can turn that distress into rest knowing that were walking in the law of attraction |
Edited by - eric watson on 02/18/2013 10:11:17 |
|
|
|
Topic |
|
|
|
Ace of the Day - Day 1...
