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blg568
USA
15 Posts |
 Posted - 01/26/2005 : 06:27:36
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Hello,
Was diagnosed with TMS about 4 ˝ years ago and made a wonderful recovery. However, since then have had 2 babies, and the pain got worse after the birth of each. So interesting that I did not experience much of a problem DURING my pregnancies (when I was 30 pounds heavier), only AFTER, when all the stress and sleep deprivation set in.
In the past couple of weeks I have begun journaling and watching Dr. Brady's videos daily.
Just looking for encouragement and am so grateful I have found this website.
Thanks,
Angie
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Rudy
United Kingdom
13 Posts |
Posted - 01/26/2005 : 07:22:50
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Newbie myself. 50% better than I was pre-Sarno.
You got better before, so you can do it again. Just follow the sarno rules and give it time |
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blg568
USA
15 Posts |
Posted - 01/26/2005 : 07:31:09
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| Thanks for the encouragement Rudy. You hang in there too! It will happen. Being patient is a key for me. |
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Baseball65
USA
734 Posts |
Posted - 01/26/2005 : 08:34:42
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Hi Angie.
Well,I never actually carried a baby,but I have 2 kids,and after the birth of my first one I began to have a chronic shoulder condition that was painful,but not completely debilitating...therapy,ice,meds.Than after the second one came,AND I became sole bread winner in the Family...completely incapacitiated with back pain.That's when I found Sarno and Healing Back Pain.
I've since recovered 110%,but looking back it is easy to see how the needs of being a "good" parent means repressing tons of emotions.Your entire social life is around the children,personal time is rare to never,and your marriage/relationship becomes strained.
I'm sure you know,having two children...people always told me about kids: " One is one and two is ten"...when we had our first,we could still occasionally get a sitter,a grandparent,someone to assist in giving us a break.After the 2nd,we had no such help,no family nearby..nothing.
So..it sounds like your doing all the right things to get rid of this relapse.
Oh yeah,weight can't correspond to pain...I'm painfree right now and I'm...uhhhh...a little thick.When I was in the most pain,I was in the best shape I'd ever been in in my whole life.
Who is Dr. Brady?? Is this a new TMS doctor?
welcome
peace
Marc aka
Baseball65 |
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blg568
USA
15 Posts |
Posted - 01/26/2005 : 09:32:14
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Marc,
Thanks for the welcome. And, thanks for your relaying your experiences when you had children. There's nothing like them, but, wow, what a change in life! We were married for 13 years before we had our first and, after being in the workforce for that long, and then, coming home and being a stay-at-home Mom, I went through a mid-life crisis bigtime! I'm so glad to know you recovered from your pain. That gives me hope that that's what it is this time around too.
Dr. Brady is a TMS doctor in Orlando (Scott Brady). He trained under Dr. Sarno and has his own set of videos out. I saw him 4 ˝ years ago when I first read about TMS. Very good Dr.
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Baseball65
USA
734 Posts |
Posted - 01/26/2005 : 09:49:27
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Hi Angie.
Well than you'll be even more encouraged that in spite of STLL being Mr. Mom ,the symptoms have NOT returned.My shoulder thing started when I used to have to watch "the baby" on my days off.
After recovering from TMS I went back to work full time.Than,my wife who had left her career to be a stay at home Mom almost had a nervous breakdown.I came home one day to find her bedridden and crying.I still remember that day quite clearly.We decided that even though it wasn't financially sensible,that she would go back to work part-time.(Taxes and daycare voided her income...it was a wash)
In the meanwhile,I was having my own mental problems.I hated my job,and was having uncontrollable anger outbursts at work.After therapy and careful consideration with my wife,we decided that it was best for the Family if SHE worked full time,and I worked part-time
around her schedule,even though I made twice what she made.
It was on of those decisions where you finally realize that life isn't only about money.We have had this arrangement ever since.She is a GREAT Mom...she just has to work to be balanced.I Love staying home and playing guitar all day,and playing with the kids afterschool......it's a lot different now that they're children and not Babies..
I Have had to(in private/journals) had to acknowledge the resentment I have against my children for taking up my time(suppressed)and that I Never had a Father(suppressed)...I never would have even "gone there" if the little prompts and suggestions weren't in Healing Back Pain.What parent would ever acknowledge resenting their own kids???
....and as long as I'm aware of it and stay in tune ,everything is AOK.Every now and than I need a tune-up....usually when I'm getting crabby.
You ought to recover fairly quickly since you've been through the drill before!
peace
Baseball65 |
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blg568
USA
15 Posts |
Posted - 01/26/2005 : 11:37:50
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Sounds like you guys have been through some tough times. So glad your pain is gone.
Yes, parenthood is a very complicated thing, mentally, physically and especially emotionally. It's very confusing admitting that something that is such a joy can be such a frustration at the same time.
Thanks again for sharing and for the encouragement. |
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Kajsa
Denmark
144 Posts |
Posted - 01/27/2005 : 00:09:53
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In Denmark A LOT of people actually split “staying home with children” (nearly all my friends did that). We have a fairly good support from the state. For 12 months you get 90% of your salary (when you worked for at least
six months) I know that Scandinavia is quite unique in this way.
There is NOTHING that says that the mother is better in taking care of the children than the father.
The child need both their parents.
Of course is good if the mother stays at home first and breastfeed.
Most people stay home for a longer period and live on less money. I stayed home for a year and my husband for eight months.
I think being with a little baby creates a very unique bounding -and it is a pity if only the women gets this
chance/bounding.
Kajsa
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blg568
USA
15 Posts |
Posted - 01/27/2005 : 06:02:54
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Kajsa,
What a wonderful set-up you have there in Denmark in regards to new parenthood. It would be so nice if the Dads were able to be more involved over here. That's so great for the entire family and it would definitely take some pressure off Mom, all the while giving baby and Daddy a chance to do more bonding.
This is so neat to be corresponding with people from different parts of the world and different cultures! |
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Laura
USA
655 Posts |
Posted - 01/29/2005 : 09:57:19
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Angie,
Welcome to the TMS forum!
It is interesting to me how our bodies/minds work in relation to specific times in our lives. I'm curious what was going on in your life 4 1/2 years ago and what your TMS symptoms were. It is amazing how stress of a new baby, new job, etc. can bring out the TMS gremlin in the way that it does.
I have two daughters, one 15 1/2 and the other will be 13 in a few months. I am 45 years old, just at that pre-menopausal age, and I'm having all sorts of fun female issues going on (possible ovarian cyst, heavy menstrual cycles, no menstrual cycles, blood clotting, etc.) It is just NOT fun!!! I think the reason so many women in their 40's have so many physical ailments is because of all the psychological warfare going on within them. Here my daughters are going through puberty and are maturing, and I'm going to be ending that part of my life. It makes me so sad! Also, it's pretty much the end of the baby era for me and that also stirs up a lot of emotions in me. (I wanted three and my husband only wanted two!)
It sounds like you're doing the right things (watching the videos of your TMS doc) and now that you found this forum I'm sure you will find that it gives you a great deal of comfort. I wish you the best of luck in your recovery and, again, welcome to the TMS board.
Laura
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blg568
USA
15 Posts |
Posted - 01/29/2005 : 11:55:45
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Hi Laura,
With regards to what was going on in my life to bring about TMS 4 ˝ years ago….of course, my first instinct was to think…"I don't want to talk about it", but then of course, that attitude is one of the reasons I'm here at this TMS website, isn't it? I'll just make a long story short. My sister's little girl passed away from cancer. It took her eyes, disfigured her beautiful little face. It was horrible seeing her go through what she went through. She was sort of like my own little girl. But, she is in heaven now. No more suffering. And, we would not bring her back if we could. It was shortly after her death that I started having the chronic lower back pain.
I'm 36, but can relate to "the end of an era" thing you're talking about. I'm done having babies after this last one and it makes me so sad in a way, not that I would want to have another one, but just knowing this was it for us.
Sorry you're dealing with health problems. I would refer you to a web-site that I found a number of years ago when my niece was sick with her cancer. www.hacres.com. I do not agree with everything this guy says, but I believe he's right on on some things.
What is your TMS story?
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