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Shamrock
26 Posts |
 Posted - 09/16/2008 : 10:44:06
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I had a lower back pain attack about a month and a half ago. Hasn'r happened since 2005. I'm still feeling pain, not as sever as when it first hit 1-1/2 months ago.
I've been doing Sarno seriously for about 3 weeks not. Got diagnosed by Dr. Paul Gwordz with TMS last month. Went to his lecture last night, and felt hopeful afterwards.
Most of the time since the pain onset, I just have this hopeless feeling. I feel sad, tired, and don't really want to be around anyone. Pretty much depressed.
I am persistently working the program. I guess I just need some reassuring words that it will all be OK.
I'm a perfectionist, so asking for help is very hard for me. I'm hoping that reaching out here will help.
Thanks.
- Shamrock |
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Dave
USA
1864 Posts |
Posted - 09/16/2008 : 10:59:34
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| Seems like something might be going on in your life recently that you are avoiding, or not fully appreciating how it is affecting you emotionally. Try to figure out what it is. Often it is something that, on the surface, you will dismiss as no big deal, yet deep down, it is affecting you in ways you do not yet realize. |
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RageSootheRatio
Canada
430 Posts |
Posted - 09/16/2008 : 11:50:44
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Shamrock, good for you for reaching out here! :o)
Dave had some great advice ...
If you have been diagnosed with TMS I'm sure that will help (unlike those of us who haven't been officially diagnosed and can still have doubts because of that.)
Don't forget the "Rage - Soothe" ratio ... so do try to do lots of soothing things to change the ratio in your favour! :o)
Dr Sarno's method has really changed my life and hope this is reassuring that all will be OK for you, too over time. |
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mizlorinj
USA
490 Posts |
Posted - 09/16/2008 : 13:20:25
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YES, joy in our life to balance everyday stressors is VERY important as rage2sooth said.
What are you doing in the program? Have you started to WRITE about your feelings?? What happened a month and a half ago to trigger back pain (psych--not physical please)?
Healing takes time, as it took time for the TMS to hit. But it DOES happen!
-Lori |
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mjwebb05
24 Posts |
Posted - 09/16/2008 : 18:59:31
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Shamrock,
I can speak from the perspective of someone who had four years of back and hip pain before I discovered TMS, and I can reassure you that it WILL be ok....just give it time, keep reading Sarno, Amir, Brady, etc. and Applying the techniques....Scott Brady's book Pain Free for LIfe really helped me to apply the techniques and ideas Sarno talks about.
Hang in there!! |
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Peg
USA
284 Posts |
Posted - 09/17/2008 : 05:54:54
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Hi Shamrock,
The length of time the pain has been hanging around must be very discouraging, I know.I remember in the past when I would have a recurrence of TMS I would sometimes get depressed. My perfectionism gave me the feeling that I was a failure because I had symptoms again. I've learned to go easier on myself and give myself credit for coming as far as I have. Now when I have a recurrence, I'm much kinder to myself. I try to deal with the issue in my life that necessitated the symptoms (by writing about it, talking it out, digging for what I'm really feeling, reassuring myself, re-reading a little bit from my Sarno library, and taking care of myself). As long as I don't catastrophize and obsess about the symptom, it resolves pretty quickly.
Do remember however that Dr. Sarno sees depression as a TMS equivalent, so if we address it or think of it in those terms and not become obsessed or worried about it, it tends to dissipate more quickly. I suspect we perfectionists criticize ouselves when we have the normal ups and downs of life, which only makes things worse. It's as if we don't give ourselves permission to feel sad. Not that we should ruminate about it but just allow it and be with it.
You said that you felt hopeful after Dr. Gwodz's lecture. I wonder if it would help you to have a CD of the TMS information to listen to it whenever you need a reminder. It might be motivating to listen to it during a walk outdoors.
Be sure to balance the TMS work with pleasurable activities.
Feel better,
Peg
In questions of science, the authority of a thousand is not worth the humble reasoning of a single individual. Galileo Galilei |
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Shamrock
26 Posts |
Posted - 09/17/2008 : 08:17:01
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Thanks all for the encouraging replies.
As for what I'm doing now. I'm doing daily readings from Sarno books (psychology and treatment sections). Dr. G also had me make a list of all the things I thought were putting pressure on me (from childhood to everyday stuff.) He said to review the list (about 20 items) many times during the day (up to 5 times an hour in the beginning) without obsessing about it. I'm doing that now along with the reading. Journaling is part of my life anyway, so I'm continuing with that.
I'm trying to pinpoint a triggering psychological event from 1-1/2 months ago. One thing that comes up is that both my ex-girlfriend b-days were in July (and I broke up with one of them about the same time, too). I remember that coming up with pangs of shame over the relationships not working out. I remember pushing it away. There's other stuff, too.
If I'm not seeing a good deal of improvement within 3-4 weeks, I'll go back for an office visit to fine tune my program.
Thanks for reading,
- Shamrock |
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RageSootheRatio
Canada
430 Posts |
Posted - 09/17/2008 : 09:20:52
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<Dr. G also had me make a list of all the things I thought were putting pressure on me (from childhood to everyday stuff.) He said to review the list (about 20 items) many times during the day (up to 5 times an hour in the beginning) without obsessing about it.
YIKES, Shamrock!! Could you elaborate on this one a little more ?? Is that so we don't stuff those issues away (as I tend to do??) |
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Shamrock
26 Posts |
Posted - 09/17/2008 : 10:13:53
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RageSoothe,
Yes, he said it as to recondition your brain, to convince it that the list of stuff is causing the pain. And by concentrating on the list, it can bring the stuff to consciousness. And making it into a list makes sure we don't get distracted and skip stuff.
I'm finding it tough to look at it so often. Looking at the list so often brings me down -- some pretty negative stuff on the list. But maybe that's the idea -- face the emotions.
- S |
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mizlorinj
USA
490 Posts |
Posted - 09/17/2008 : 11:04:44
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Shamrock:
FACING the emotions is most definitely the idea. |
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Jena
USA
195 Posts |
Posted - 09/17/2008 : 13:34:41
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| I went through the same thing and eventually I would realize "Hey I havent had back pain today" than i started saying, "hey I havent had back pain in a week" and so on. You will get through this. I know because I have cured my back pain for 5 years now. Fear is the biggest thing to overcome. Fear of exersize and fear of it being something underlying causing you pain. It is TMS! Let go of the fear and journal your emotions. you will be okay. you are okay. TMS can be defeated. (it takes time) |
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marytabby
USA
545 Posts |
Posted - 09/17/2008 : 14:40:27
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Just chiming in to say hang in with the concepts and do the work. You'll get there. It can take time. Those that have an "overnight" success are rare. I know they do occur but not regularly. I too am experiencing some new symptoms. I have to really dig around to try to feel what it is that brought them on. I experienced a huge loss in Feb when my best friend died unexpectedly overnight. Here today, gone tomorrow type situation. 6 months after the death I'm still grieving but I think it's hitting me harder now than it did when it happened. It's the only thing that could be causing these symptoms. I have to work through it and I know that and I'll get there.
You will too.
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Edited by - marytabby on 09/17/2008 14:41:03 |
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RageSootheRatio
Canada
430 Posts |
Posted - 09/18/2008 : 07:30:01
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>Yes, he said it as to recondition your brain, to convince it that the list of stuff is causing the pain. And by concentrating on the list, it can bring the stuff to consciousness. And making it into a list makes sure we don't get distracted and skip stuff. I'm finding it tough to look at it so often. Looking at the list so often brings me down -- some pretty negative stuff on the list. But maybe that's the idea -- face the emotions.
Thanks, Shamrock. This is really interesting and helpful info for me. Not sure where this will go for me, but I realize this "list brining me down" happens to me... I just don't want to "face the emotions" sometimes and think "why do I just want to get all depressed journalling about stuff when things are going half-OK?" And I think that has contributed to my current "relapse." On the PLUS side I really did deal with some emotionally difficult things yesterday and .... NO PAIN !! (well, at least no physical pain!!) And so that was really great, not to be limited at all in that way.
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mizlorinj
USA
490 Posts |
Posted - 09/18/2008 : 12:52:06
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My dear people: you are missing the point of "the list".
The list you are asked to make is for topics you need to then JOURNAL about. Journaling: write, feel the feelings; working through the pain (or hurt, etc.) gets the feelings out! They must be processed. Then when you feel that topic has been covered, cross it off the list. Next time you look at the list you will see you are making progress! It's a good thing! Not meant to bring you down.
I never viewed my list as "darn, so many things to plague me." I viewed it as I need to get these things off me so let's get a move on it. So I did. I healed the emotions and the back/butt pain healing followed!
There is much talk of journaling, but reading many posts of late I really have wondered how many people take the time to actually do it. Ppl come back with the same issues or others and wonder why they are still having pain. What have you done to process the feelings thus removing them??
Emotional health = physical health (I'll be using that phrase a lot now since it just hit me!)  |
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RageSootheRatio
Canada
430 Posts |
Posted - 09/22/2008 : 14:53:57
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>I never viewed my list as "darn, so many things to plague me." I viewed it as I need to get these things off me so let's get a move on it. So I did. I healed the emotions and the back/butt pain healing followed!
Thanks, Lori .. your whole post was very helpful to me. I appreciate ALL your posts, actually! The journalling (as well as other Sarno-related work) has paid off big-time for me ... when I look back on it, it is truly one of the things I am most grateful for, in my whole life. Your reminders are important as I strive to work on other aspects (not so debilitating symptom imperatives) of my TMS. |
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Shamrock
26 Posts |
Posted - 09/22/2008 : 15:36:15
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Thanks so much to everyone for the replies. I'm continuing my TMS work, and am dedicated to keep going.
Sometimes it's really hard to not climb into bed and stay there. Even though I wouldn't classify my symptoms as debilitating, they are exhausting. Especially since a few months ago I was physically active and in, what I thought, was a good relationship.
I'm getting at lots of issues (most of which I knew about, but haven't been addressing.) It hard for me to say this... right now I feel really worthless and sad. I feel broken both physically and spiritually.
In the past few month, I've had lots of big crying sessions and some pillow-punching (at lots of issues). I can feel my perfectionism raging at the pain. I miss my good-humored, outgoing self so much. I need to be more gentle with myself.
- Shamrock |
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I need some encouraging words, please
