| Author |
 Topic  |
|
|
crk
124 Posts |
 Posted - 09/21/2008 : 16:12:57
|
I used Sarno's books to get rid of 7 years of chronic pain back in 2002-03. Since then I have had 2 or 3 additional severe episodes, with pain in different places. Knowing what the pain is has been my main weapon in defeating it.
I am a distance runner. My 15th marathon is coming up in 2 weeks, and my training has gone *very* well this summer. About a week ago, I did a 23 mile run -- enjoyed it and absolutely rocked. "I'm ready," said I. Next day, a scary pain (red flag #1 = scary) erupted on my shin. Now, I should have known better, but it's like if you let the pain get a foothold by wondering if you really might be injured this time, boom. Every severe episode I've had has started with a false belief or suspicion. Those minor trigger pains which I recognize as TMS right away are laughably easy to Sarno-ize. But I wasn't sure this week, and I opened the Pandora's box. All week I have struggled and suffered. I missed one run ("might be hurt, oh no!"), which I now see was a mistake, and I have had excruciating pain during all of the others.
This is TMS, no doubt. The pain has moved around (ankle, high shin, low shin, toes, knee) and has pierced me like a knife during the times when I tried to focus on the "reservoir of rage." Not just during running, but at all hours. When it is not severe, it is usually a low ache in the background. Weirdly, I can make it disappear with a flood of warmth if I lean over and stroke it lightly with 4 fingertips.
Finally, my question. (Thanks for your patience.) Do you think that a cause beyond the emotional stress, that is linked with certain motions of the body, can develop after the initial trigger? In other words, once I figure out that it's TMS (with devotional certainty!), and do several days worth of self-awareness exercises and journaling, am I still fighting against a sort of automatic brain connection?
I've run about 40 miles since the day before this episode occurred. Getting in touch with my anger while running, quite frankly, has seemed like fuel for the fire. I guess it's possible that the way out is through even more intense pain, but I cannot believe that when I have been able to lessen the pain through other means. Here is the thought that (of many) has been the most successful in diminishing my pain this week: (while continuing to run) "Yes, you've got me now. But I will win. You'll hurt me for a while, but I have always banished you eventually and it is just a matter of time and you will be GONE. I'll be running down this very street next month, or next week and I might feel tired or struggle with bad weather, but YOU will NOT be there. Your days are numbered. I will laugh at you like I have done before..."
Just typing that made it diminish. Wow. But what I wonder is whether my remembrance of being pain free somehow broke that automatic connection which I suspect TMS may have fashioned. Is there more than getting in touch with our rage? Could that be why TMS does not disappear immediately for some of us? And could that be the reason that our TMS cannot pop up again a week after we've beaten it? (True for me at least. "That pain was right here. It's gone, poof. Really gone. Even though I just got upset over that exact same thing as before...")
Sorry for the long post. I'll be so happy to hear others' thoughts but I wanted to make sure my question was clear. |
Edited by - crk on 09/21/2008 17:37:17 |
|
|
mizlorinj
USA
490 Posts |
Posted - 09/22/2008 : 13:49:39
|
Hi there. I wouldn't be focusing on anger or any negative emotions while I need energy running. I'd focus on "dang, nice day out here, this feels so good, I'm so happy I can run, love my life, aw check out that cute woodchuck (yes, that's what I say when I'm bike riding and notice one!) . . ." type of thinking.
And journaling or telling ourselves things doesn't sink into the unconscious instantly. Most of us didn't have instant pain; it was a buildup over time as the reservoir was beginning to overflow (I can still remember Dr. Sarno's overflowing beaker drawing of my "stuff"). So please don't expect instant or a day later results every time. Though the other part of me right now is saying you will get what you expect so maybe that IS an idea. . . and speaking kind and lovingly to ourselves helps too. I see nothing wrong with your remembering being pain free and making THAT your focal point. Affirming I WILL BE THERE AGAIN, and soon! or every cell in my body is healthy, I have boundless energy, etc. Repetitive thoughts cause a belief.
Your advantage is you've already seen this work for you!
-Lori |
Edited by - mizlorinj on 09/22/2008 13:52:15 |
 |
|
|
swmr1
USA
118 Posts |
Posted - 09/22/2008 : 16:26:53
|
quote:
Here is the thought that (of many) has been the most successful in diminishing my pain this week: (while continuing to run) "Yes, you've got me now. But I will win. You'll hurt me for a while, but I have always banished you eventually and it is just a matter of time and you will be GONE. I'll be running down this very street next month, or next week and I might feel tired or struggle with bad weather, but YOU will NOT be there. Your days are numbered. I will laugh at you like I have done before..."
Seems like you just aren't giving in to the fear. I don't know if you have to feel bad for giving TMS a foothold by letting the thought of the physical enter your mind. I think that's pretty natural to wonder. But it seems like you have the confidence in your body down pat. You, after all those marathons, are bound to have a lot of confidence there! That's how I'm trying to approach my TMS things. I've seen my body do some great things and I believe in its ability to withstand and heal.
That said, I have to ask you if you've dealt with tendinitis and TMS in your running career. I'm training for my first marathon (after not running since 2002) and have started to have some foot tendinitis recently (after my 9 and 11 mile runs). I'm pushing on but realizing that I may have to back off at some point since I don't have a very extensive running background. I'm much better suited to the water, really |
|
|
| |
Topic |
|
|
|
Neurons that "fire together wire together?"
