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icelikeaninja
USA
316 Posts |
 Posted - 06/06/2013 : 12:23:25
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So now my tms has no pattern or particular gauge.
Don't get me wrong the pain is constant but seems to be moving more alot lately.
When I first suspected tms the pain moved around, when i felt more comfortable with tms the pains that I had all over left and what was remaining was one constant pain in the groin.
When that subsided the other pains came back, then all together they came. In the course of when I woke up with moring I must have had it in four or five different places now its in just one.
Instead of getting overly crazy about this I really now take the time to dedicate my journaling and reading.
Before I got nothing out of reading the Divided Mind, HBP was my go to.
So before I was just doing this tms thing aimlessly, journaling when I felt like it as well as reading.
Now to my conclusion, I didn't really work on these issues, just when I wanted. Does it help people to dedicate the time every morning or every night to the cause.
Usually going to bed I have no problems or pains but in the morning I feel it gradually coming, going, moving just in one specific region.
But in light of everything I feel today is my real first day in "working" on the tms instead of just thinking "oh its tms I can work on it whenever" when at the same time I am looking up symptoms of what else it can be.
When was the best time to work on this for most people? Day,night?
Also while I was journaling I caught myself smiling at things I shouldnt smile about and really really focused on the reason why I smiled. Never noticed this while not working with a therapist.
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art
1903 Posts |
Posted - 06/06/2013 : 13:10:56
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I see this a lot, the often urgent feeling that we need to work at certain things to get rid of our pain. Journaling, relaxation exercises, meditation, physical exercise, and pondering what's up with our subconscious are all good things.
However very frequently, none of them either individually or together will get to the central issue, that is the thing that's driving our pain...often directly. By which I mean, worry and fear...
If you do nothing else but sufficiently reduce your worry and fear, your pain will almost certainly disappear. If you can't coax yourself into sufficiently accepting that your symptoms are psychosomatic to do that, then you can take a short-cut by instead just ignoring your pain. In my experience that can be done by force of will...as opposed to forcing a faith which is deeply enough felt.
Just one man's opinion of course, (informed by 8 years of mostly active participation on the forum in addition to my own hard earned experience). |
Edited by - art on 06/06/2013 15:30:19 |
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icelikeaninja
USA
316 Posts |
Posted - 06/06/2013 : 13:32:28
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Art,
Thanks for replying. Its been so long since I had the excruciating chest pains that it feels like its totally erased from my mind.
Years of chest pain gone in one day made my tms ideals jump. I fellt I could conquer all pains. This is no different but I need to get back to that place. |
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bryan3000
USA
513 Posts |
Posted - 06/06/2013 : 13:50:14
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| Great answer, Art. Thanks! |
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art
1903 Posts |
Posted - 06/06/2013 : 15:27:32
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quote:
Originally posted by icelikeaninja
Art,
Thanks for replying. Its been so long since I had the excruciating chest pains that it feels like its totally erased from my mind.
Years of chest pain gone in one day made my tms ideals jump. I fellt I could conquer all pains. This is no different but I need to get back to that place.
Ah the glory days of past successes. I swear to God, when I first read HBP after years of sometimes having to eat meals on all 4's (ungainly image to say the least, but it's a true story), I felt like I'd experience a genuine miracle. It was instant, permanent relief.
But why? And why have I had to struggle so much with other symptoms when the first was so easy?
Because there was something about Sarno's brilliant discussion of back problems that absolutely convinced me. Whammo. Gone was the fear. Double whammo. Gone were the pain, the spasms, and the eating on all fours.
In every case since, it's been my own fear and doubt that's held me back. Unfortunately I'm not all that bright and it took me years to fully understand that. But you don't have to spend all that time flailing around ice. All you have to do is believe, or more directly and accurately, stop worrying. |
Edited by - art on 06/06/2013 15:28:36 |
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icelikeaninja
USA
316 Posts |
Posted - 06/06/2013 : 17:19:49
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Art,
You are totally right. When my big pains left years ago I was on the verge of opening my own business. I thought more about that than tms. The pain was still there but I had a bigger distraction that was life.
These last two years have been constant loss and grieving.
But still its hard to remember my old tmms self. I remember waking up to no pain and not even noticing it was a pain free day! You are right about the not caring or being fearful |
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Darko
Australia
387 Posts |
Posted - 06/06/2013 : 17:44:57
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Hey Ice,
"When my big pains left years ago I was on the verge of opening my own business."
"These last two years have been constant loss and grieving."
Could it also have been that you were in a much more positive state of mind back then. You might have felt really good about where you were heading, and good about yourself?
Now...things don't sound so positive and you have all this tension ( or other negative emotions ) being pumped into the system.
Mine did the exact same thing...its because you know it's BS but the tension is still there so the mind and nervous system is in over drive. No amount of relaxing will change this......you have to change the way you look at your situation to stop generating all this deep repressed tension.
D |
Edited by - Darko on 06/06/2013 17:49:10 |
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icelikeaninja
USA
316 Posts |
Posted - 06/07/2013 : 08:50:51
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Hey Darko,
Yes, in the last three years I got divorced, my dog of 16 years died, my grandmother whom I was living with died a month later, girlfriend left me under similar circumstances as my wife(moved to another country to pursue their dreams), jobs, family.
I use to love the Spring and Summers so much but it seems for the last 5 or 6 years they have been horrible to me.
So I was in a much better place mentally, heck even during the times I dealt with all that loss I was fine, the only things that really messed me up were the women leaving me.
I was reading alot of Law of Attraction stuff and forced myself to keep a positive attitude during these times. Do you think that had anything to do with it? |
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icelikeaninja
USA
316 Posts |
Posted - 06/07/2013 : 15:22:33
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Today I am feeling the testicular pain. This tms beast is something else.
What's funny is that when I am intimate with my girlfriend or otherwise the pains seem to leave and come back maybe ten minutes later.
It is like nothing was ever there for that short of time.
Did a bad thing and looked up all these things but my mind keeps veering back to tms.
I have symptoms of everything related to the region it is really pathetic and annoying.
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Darko
Australia
387 Posts |
Posted - 06/07/2013 : 16:37:57
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A positive attitude is waste of time if you have a negative belief system......which you do. I know that cause you obviously keep focusing on the negative things which you keep attracting :-)
The topic too large and I don't have the time these days for massive posts, but you have to think about the 7 yr old inside of you. How do you think the 7 yr old you feels about everything that happened....rational? I think not.....calm him, talk to him and show him how everything will work out ok and what YOU will do about all of this. You have to take some positive action to make sure the same crap doesnt happen again.
Oh and if you still have even the slightest thought that you might have a physical issue then this is a waste of time.
You will not become pain/tension free over night......you have to work on you and not on getting on getting better. The pain is a result of ( insert whatever it is for you ) I think it's different for everyone.
D |
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bryan3000
USA
513 Posts |
Posted - 06/07/2013 : 17:18:32
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Ice,
If you made this decision....
I'm going to ignore all symptoms. I'm not going to post about them, I'm not going to talk about them and I'm sure the hell not going to let them stop my basic duties.... for one week.
One week.
No books, forums, nothing. You pretend they don't exist, and calmly go through life. Yes, your mind is going to try to wonder about them and your job will be to shut it off the best you can. If you can't shut it off, you accept it passively.... but don't build on it. Don't fuel it.
You recognize it as NOISE your mind is creating to try to get your attention.
You know at this point you're in no physical danger.
If you could commit to this for ONE week. What is the worst that could happen?
What do you think the worst outcome of trying that would be?
At the end of one week, you can go back to brooding over symptoms constantly. (That's not an insult, I've been there myself.) But, if after a week you feel like you were better off combing the internet for answers, you can do that.
Surely, one week would be worth a try, no?
No worries about TMS, or "smiling" or what your "unconscious" is up to... no creating elaborate stories about how your brain did this and so you did that and your brain did this in response.... nothing. No more.
I'm not saying this will cure you.... but I think you'll find something very interesting at the end of one week.
Just a thought. Good luck.
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icelikeaninja
USA
316 Posts |
Posted - 06/07/2013 : 18:32:06
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Darko,
You are right, I keep expecting an over night result and keep getting dissapointed. What do you think a good medium is to work on this?
Sarno says read the treatment chapter every day. That will easily take an hour from Divided Mind.
He also suggests doing 30 mins in the morning and 15 mins at night of TMS work.
Are these to be done all at once? Do I read for 30 mins and then write for 15?
I just want something uniform so I can do it once a day and just stop without thinking I didn't do enough.
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Bryan3000,
I am going away this weekend to my mothers new house near the suburbs of Pittsburgh. No internet, no tv, cell phone reception is bad.
I wanted to bring my Divided Mind with me, so are you just outright suggesting no TMS work nothing, cold turkey?
I am open to many idea's and I might just leave the book at home. |
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bryan3000
USA
513 Posts |
Posted - 06/07/2013 : 19:03:04
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Yes, ESPECIALLY if you're going out of town! That's perfect.
I would venture to guess that most anxiety specialists ("TMS doctors") would suggest you don't kill yourself with the "work."
Claire Weekes wrote long ago... "don't be upset if you cannot practice"... meaning, we have to get away from this stuff now and again.
So, I'm just another dude on the internet... but all signs (to me) point to yes. I think you should put all books down, all forums... everything for a week. Make it your new "work" to not work. Focus on your job, friends, family, anything that is important. If the pain is unbearable, give yourself the rest you need but do your best to keep distracted. Do your best to not think about the pain.... instead, think about NOT letting it distract you from life.
I remember at the worst of my breakdown... I'd do dishes, or yard work... just so I could say I got something done that day and that anxiety (etc) did not rob me of my day. I would go to my daughter's events in absolute agony/distress... and refused to let it take things away form me.
Now, I'm still healing overall... so I'm by no means an expert. But, I have come a long way from where I believe you are now, and I highly recommend you trying another approach.
Again, a week passes.... you're no better, and you can go back to focusing on the pain and symptoms and TMS work. But, I believe you have nothing to lose and a few things to gain which I won't mention at this point... so you can see for yourself.
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icelikeaninja
USA
316 Posts |
Posted - 06/07/2013 : 19:30:30
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This is exactly what I will do then.
I need a break.
I will be 6 hours away from home with tons of yard work and renovations until Tuesday.
Going to help step dad mow a 5 acre lawn and at night my mom wants to go ghost hunting ( don't ask)
Thanks again.
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bryan3000
USA
513 Posts |
Posted - 06/07/2013 : 20:36:04
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That's the right kind of ghost-hunting!! Do that instead. :)
Have a great trip.
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moving pain now the norm
