| Author |
 Topic  |
|
shawnsmith
Czech Republic
2048 Posts |
 Posted - 01/03/2013 : 07:22:46
|
If there is anything I physically do to avoid the pain then I am telling myself that I don't have TMS but some kind of structural problem and thus will not recover.
There are occasions / people within my life which trigger symptoms.
The more I dwell on the symptoms the longer they will remain.
The more I want to get well the longer the symptoms will persist.
Fear of oncoming symptom attacks prolongs suffering. |
|
|
pspa123
672 Posts |
Posted - 01/03/2013 : 08:23:07
|
| It would be helpful to me if you could elaborate on the fourth point? |
 |
|
|
Ace1
USA
1040 Posts |
Posted - 01/03/2013 : 08:44:36
|
| great post shawn |
|
|
|
shawnsmith
Czech Republic
2048 Posts |
Posted - 01/03/2013 : 09:09:11
|
quote:
Originally posted by pspa123
It would be helpful to me if you could elaborate on the fourth point?
It may be a bit difficult to elaborate on the idea that the more I want to get well the longer the symptoms will persist, as it is not easy to explain. But I have heard it from other TMS sufferers also. I think it has a lot to do with not living mentally in the moment as well as continually thinking physically which, let's face it, we all do and it impedes progress. The fact of the matter, as odd as it may sound, is that if you have TMS you are already physically well and the symptoms are nothing to be feared, yet we all fear them because they are so painful and anxiety inducing. In that sense, the symptoms are fulfilling their purpose of distracting us away from very powerful repressed emotions. In my case, I think one of my major repressed emotions is fear of abandonment, loss and not being taken care of which stems from early childhood and adolescent experiences surrounding mom and dad's divorce after 29 years of marriage. When we keep telling ourselves "I wish I would get well and that I am not well," it impedes progress because we are telling ourselves that we are physically ill when in fact we are not. We become totally focused on the body-- this or that pain -- and when we do this it is counter productive. But, you most likely will ask, how is it that one can stay focused away from the pain when it is so intense and persistent? Possibly you are lying in bed at night and have nothing to distract you away from your pain and you simply cannot sleep because of it. All day you are practically disabled and every movement is very uncomfortable. You keep telling yourself that I wish I would get well, which is natural, but ironically the statement also is saying you are not well, which is not the case at all. Thus your mind becomes focused on the symptoms and in the process the symptoms continue to fulfill their function and thus they persist.
|
Edited by - shawnsmith on 01/03/2013 14:02:47 |
|
|
|
pspa123
672 Posts |
Posted - 01/03/2013 : 13:19:55
|
| Thank you. I think I understand that but at the same time, for those of us who need to do more than simply "thinking psychologically," isn't the very act of working towards improvement by whatever means -- self-examination, cognitive restructuring, affirmations, relaxation, etc. etc. -- an acknowledgement that we aren't there yet and therefore, at some level, are not well but want to get well? Maybe it's a matter of semantics, I don't know. |
|
|
|
shawnsmith
Czech Republic
2048 Posts |
Posted - 01/03/2013 : 14:54:39
|
quote:
Originally posted by pspa123
Thank you. I think I understand that but at the same time, for those of us who need to do more than simply "thinking psychologically," isn't the very act of working towards improvement by whatever means -- self-examination, cognitive restructuring, affirmations, relaxation, etc. etc. -- an acknowledgement that we aren't there yet and therefore, at some level, are not well but want to get well? Maybe it's a matter of semantics, I don't know.
Consider Dr. Sarno's understanding of stress in his book Healing Back Pain. (See: http://tmshelp.com/forum/topic.asp?TOPIC_ID=7981) Note especially where he writes, "Examples of external stress are your job, financial problems, illness, change of job or home, caring for children or parents. However, the internal stressors appear to be more important in the production of tension. These are one's own personality attributes, like conscientiousness, perfectionism, the need to excel, and so forth." (Emphasis mine)
In other words, the production of internal stressors should be the focus of our attention when addressing TMS and not necessarily the reduction of symptoms. We place a tremendous amount of pressure on ourselves to get well and even feel embarrassed when we don't due to, as Dr. Sarno says, "one's own personality attributes, like conscientiousness, perfectionism, the need to excel, and so forth." TMS, in other words, can lead to more TMS because we place so much pressure on ourselves to get well and when we don't see progress, increased tension and stress is generated within us.
I would like to note that this my lived experience and may not be yours. |
|
|
|
eric watson
USA
601 Posts |
Posted - 01/03/2013 : 15:28:50
|
i think its awesome shawn -and your right on the money-
delve into those traits-find out what traits are the leading cause of stressors and pat yourself on the back as you sooth them out |
|
|
|
stiwa
Germany
16 Posts |
Posted - 01/05/2013 : 06:50:01
|
Hi Shawn,
have you found a way of reducing the pressure on yourself to get well?
Stiwa |
|
|
|
shawnsmith
Czech Republic
2048 Posts |
Posted - 01/05/2013 : 07:11:45
|
quote:
Originally posted by stiwa
Hi Shawn,
have you found a way of reducing the pressure on yourself to get well?
Stiwa
From my understanding of Dr Sarno's work, I am note sure that reducing the pressure on oneself to achieve anything is the path to healing from TMS. It is, rather, the recognition that this is taking place internally which in turn is instrumental in producing symptoms. Once we recognize this, our focus of attention is internal and we are then in a position to dismiss attributing the symptoms to any physical origin. Does that make sense to you?
My problem, as I see it, is that I understand the process, having read all of Dr. Sarno's books and a few other TMS writers, but this has not brought about a full resolution to my symptoms. There is still something holding me back and I have not been able to get a full grasp of what that something is. If you were to see me and did not know me you would think I am fully functional with no TMS at all, but it is very much present. (In don't like to discuss symptoms as it is counter-productive for the purposes of this discussion board) I do understand the role of over-intellectualiztion as well as fear in perpetuating symptoms, and I am trying to overcome these two hurdles. |
Edited by - shawnsmith on 01/05/2013 07:18:05 |
|
|
|
Ace1
USA
1040 Posts |
Posted - 01/05/2013 : 07:55:25
|
| Dear Shawn, you do have to change. In my opinion and in my own recovery and in the recovery of the many people I have helped guide to that end it was essential. I spoke with dr Sarno's psychotherapist Arlene Feinblatt and she told me the part about not changing is not correct. Maybe this is why your still stuck. I want you to get better. I know you once said affirmations are not for you. Why don't you try them the way I have on my list of how to recover give it a few months and see if there is any improvement? What do you have to loose? I was in the same position as you until I started doing the things on that list and practicing with them. I think also challenging my pain was holding me back. Arlene once told me that the people who get better fast, that never get to see her, are so afraid that something is wrong with them and when they find out there is nothing wrong that's all it takes to get them better. I think in the difficult cases like myself and yourself a change in how intensely we do things is critical, and we need the development of a very important virtue which is patience. |
|
|
|
shawnsmith
Czech Republic
2048 Posts |
Posted - 01/05/2013 : 08:08:07
|
| What list are you referring to? |
|
|
|
Ace1
USA
1040 Posts |
Posted - 01/05/2013 : 10:11:50
|
| It's called repeating the keys to healing. It has like 23 points. I will bring it up to the top of the forum |
Edited by - Ace1 on 01/05/2013 10:13:34 |
|
|
|
tennis tom
USA
4749 Posts |
Posted - 01/05/2013 : 14:40:59
|
quote:
Originally posted by shawnsmith
There is still something holding me back and I have not been able to get a full grasp of what that something is.
Shawn, what stressful life situations are you experiencing on the Rahe-Holmes list that are causing your TMS?
THE HOLMES-RAHE STRESS TEST
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Holmes_and_Rahe_stress_scale
|
Edited by - tennis tom on 01/05/2013 14:43:47 |
|
|
|
stiwa
Germany
16 Posts |
Posted - 01/05/2013 : 16:02:40
|
| Thanks for your reply, Shawn. I am not quite sure whether a change of focus is all that is necessary. Sometimes I think my focus is nowhere but internal. I guess if Jesus had known about TMS he would have said: be in the world, not in your head... |
|
|
|
shawnsmith
Czech Republic
2048 Posts |
Posted - 01/05/2013 : 17:59:39
|
How are you going to change what takes place in the unconscious mind? You can't. Remember, the emotions you can consciously feel are not the emotions which are a source of the problem. You can never know with certainty what takes place in unconscious mind, but merely speculate. (Note, I don't merely read Sarno, I study his work also.) Dr. Sarno writes about this in his books. Here is what he writes in page 33-34 of Healing Back Pain:
THE UNCONSCIOUS MIND
The word unconscious has an unfortunate other use, that is, to be
out of contact as in sleep or when brain damaged. However, it is
firmly entrenched in the psychological literature as referring to
that part of emotional activity of which we are usually unaware,
and we should, therefore, use the word when discussing emotions.
We would probably be more comfortable with the word
subconscious, and will use it when talking about things below the
level of awareness other than the emotions.
The unconscious is subterranean, the realm of the hidden and
mysterious and the place where all sorts of feelings may reside,
not all logical, not all nice and some of them downright scary. We
get some hint of the kind of things that inhabit the unconscious
from our dreams. Someone said that every night when we go to
sleep we all go quietly and safely insane because that's when the
remnants of childish, primitive, wild behavior that are a part of
everyone#146;s emotional repertoire can show themselves without being
monitored by the waking, conscious mind. The unconscious is the
repository of all of our feelings, regardless of their social or personal acceptability. To know about the unconscious is extremely
important, for what goes on down there may be responsible for
those personality characteristics that drive us to behave as we do
when we#146;re awake#151;and the unconscious is where TMS and other
disorders like it originate.
It is an interesting fact that the overwhelming majority of
emotional and mental activity occurs below the level of
consciousness. The human mind is something like an iceberg -- the
part that we are aware of, the conscious mind, represents a very
small part of the total. It is in the subconscious mind that all of the complicated processing goes on that allows us, for example, to
generate written and oral language; to think, to reason, to remember;
in short, to do most of the things that identify us as human beings.
Our ability to make sense of the things we see, to recognize faces,
and dozens of other mental activities we take for granted are the
result of brain activity of which we are unaware.
It is likely that the majority of emotional reactions occur in the
unconscious. Feelings that remain there do so because they are
repressed and it is these that are responsible for the sequence of
events that causes TMS. This condition begins and ends in the
unconscious.
Incidentally, one should make a distinction, as Freud did a long
time ago, between mental items that are not conscious but which
can be brought to consciousness with effort, like the things in our
memories. Freud called that mental domain the preconscious
and things in the unconscious that are unavailable and cannot be
recalled. We simply don't know they are there.
To better understand how and why TMS gets started, it's
essential to look at some of these unconscious emotional processes. |
Edited by - shawnsmith on 01/05/2013 18:03:53 |
|
|
|
MatthewNJ
USA
691 Posts |
Posted - 01/05/2013 : 20:18:22
|
My 2 cents.
-1- If you say "I want to get better", you will always want to get better. The universe gives you what you ask for. Be careful what you ask for. That said, I choose to say I am healthy and I am strong. Those are in the moment affirmations, not "wants".
-2- I do not believe we can completely reduce our daily stresses. Some yes, but not the majority. What we can do is choose how we respond to them vs reacting without a choice.
"Between stimulus and response there is a space. In that space is our power to choose our response. In our response lies our growth and our freedom." Viktor E. Frankl
He wrote "Man's Search for Meaning". Dr. Frankl was a psychiatrist and survived the Nazi concentration camps. He developed Logotherapy
Mindfulness of how you feel all the time allows you to choose! Not an easy task, but I have been practicing it a long time, and the more I practice the better I get!
Matthew
Ferretsx3@comcast.net
--------------------
Less activated, more regulated and more resilient. |
|
|
|
bjackson034
USA
19 Posts |
Posted - 01/05/2013 : 20:53:14
|
| Nicely articulated. |
|
|
|
shawnsmith
Czech Republic
2048 Posts |
Posted - 01/06/2013 : 05:16:07
|
Thanks Matthew! In fact, I own a copy of Viktor E. Frankl's "Man's Search For Meaning" and maybe now is the time to read it. Here is the entire book online:
http://www.spiritual-minds.com/philosophy/assorted/ ebook %20Viktor%20Frankl%20-%20Man s%20Search%20For%20Meaning%20 psychology,%20psychotherapy,%20philosophy -o.pdf
You can also listen to it at:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Gq1Zm3j_9LE |
Edited by - shawnsmith on 01/13/2013 07:53:45 |
|
|
|
mala
Hong Kong
774 Posts |
Posted - 01/07/2013 : 04:09:01
|
Great post Shawn. I have a question. You said that
quote:
In my case, I think one of my major repressed emotions is fear of abandonment, loss and not being taken care of which stems from early childhood and adolescent experiences surrounding mom and dad's divorce after 29 years of marriage.
Do you still feel that fear of abandonment & loss ? Doesn't it go away once you have recognized & identified the source which in your case I think you have.
Thanx
Mala
Mala Singh Barber. I'm on facebook. Look me up
|
|
|
|
shawnsmith
Czech Republic
2048 Posts |
Posted - 01/07/2013 : 04:49:20
|
Hi Mala
Well, I can't speak for anyone else, but yes I do continue to have these fears and I doubt they will ever go away. |
|
|
|
KristenG
USA
29 Posts |
Posted - 01/09/2013 : 11:07:56
|
quote:
The more I want to get well the longer the symptoms will persist.
My .02 on this is that you are already well. It is just that your perception is off. If you believe yourself to be well, you will. If you doubt it, you won't. It sounds simple, but sometimes we try to make things more difficult that they are. Henry Ford said something like "Whether you think you can, or you think you can't, you're right!" Same sort of thing. Again, this is just my .02.
quote:
There are occasions / people within my life which trigger symptoms.
This is one that I struggle with. If anyone can offer any insight on this I am all ears.
Kristen |
|
|
|
Topic |
|
|
|
Five things I have learned
