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lobstershack
Australia
250 Posts |
Posted - 02/28/2005 : 20:25:47
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Hi!
So remember how I had been struggling with whether or not I NEEDED to see a TMS doctor, well it turned out both Gwozdz and Angelov do not take my insurance, and Gwozdz--his receptionist is very, very nice--did agree to cut his cost for me and allow me to "choose my own payment plan," but unfortunately, it's still a bit much.
It is important to note that both my therapist as well as members of this board did not think it was imperative that I see a TMS doctor, and since I never had any structural abnormalities appear on X-ray or CT scans and all my neurological and blood tests always came out fine--with the exception of what I like to call a few "blips," the Lyme Disease, which was equivocal (and I did not stop until I found a doctor who would treat me despite the test: over a year of antibiotics, 6 months of which were IV); and the very high IgG gliadin antibody (this measures gluten sensitivity, but this marker in particular is not "gliadin specific", that would be IgA, and it had been known to appear positive in many individuals who do not have this sensitivity), but I went gluten-free as well as (insert one of myriad foods here)-free for over 6 months.
Where am I going with all of this? Well, while my parents are aware that my therapist is not of the traditional school and does incorporate mindbody practices into almost everything (I believed he was under the tutelage of Baba Ramdas for a while back in the day), but I had yet to tell them about Sarno and Lee in detail and my thoughts about seeing a TMS doctor.
For some reason I wanted to keep my desire to see a TMS doctor "hidden" from them, knowing how many doctors (not to mention $$) I had put them through in the past. Also, I was reluctant to tell them I still had physical symptoms; scared in a way.
Well, I decided that I must broach this subject, because, among other things, I was due to give them an update on some of the issues I am covering in therapy (something I like to do every so often). I explained to them basically everything I have told you, and while I did mention still working through some physical symptoms, I did not go into very much detail about them, glossing over items like chronicity.
They both felt that my seeing another doctor was not appropriate and were also concerned--as was my therapist--that it would do nothing but perpetuate my condition (you have to realize that in the past I was OBSESSED with going to doctors, and as soon as I went to one and told myself that there would be no more afterwards, something inevitably began to bother me (mentally and physically) and the cycle would continue).
Suffice it to say, I agreed with them (and you), although I do intend to contact Gwozdz and thank him for his offer. But what is more is that I felt a wonderful relief after sitting them down one by one and telling them this. Like I wasn't "hiding" anything anymore.
I have been feeling good, albeit not everything has disappeared, but I do feel as though I am slowly regaining my life--an odd feeling I must admit--I am slowly breaking free of the prison cell I had built around myself over the past 5 years. And in addition, I am finding the Sarno concepts sinking in even deeper, as it is becoming easier and easier to dispel the terrifying fears related to my pain (mainly that it will never go away).
I am certain it will only get better from here, but I must admit, this return to normalcy, even though symptoms still remain (but lest we forget that we MUST return to our normal routines despite any lingering symptoms) is hard to adjust to. I can see clearly how my symptoms have become a "companion" of sorts over the years. And now it's time to say goodbye...
Seth |
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lobstershack
Australia
250 Posts |
Posted - 02/28/2005 : 20:28:01
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I did forget to mention: although I try my hardest to ignore the pains in my shins and ankles while I am running, sometimes I do find myself stopping short of the goal I had set for myself. In the event that this does occur, I always try and tell my brain that even though I stopped short that does not mean I am giving into the physicality of things. Any thoughts would be appreciated!
Seth |
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pault
USA
169 Posts |
Posted - 03/01/2005 : 04:38:44
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Seth , you might mention to your brain that the pain never amounts to anything but harmless pain and that you do not need it as it is not necessary. Paul. |
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almost there
109 Posts |
Posted - 03/01/2005 : 08:25:44
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Seth- I do think you are making progress....slowly....but this is the way it goes for the majority of TMS people! I still think you should stick with Dr. Sarno and resist jumping around to different doctors even if they are diciples of "the master"! This can only confuse you...re-read your Dr. Sarno books...keep moving... and when you feel pain...do what the others on this board have told you....take a deep breath....tell your brain there is nothing physically wrong... relax the painful area...telling your brain at the same time to allow the blood to flow more freely into that area...that there is no need for it to do this any longer...and keep on doing what you were doing...you'll be surprised at the reduction in symtoms...slowly...but surely! The only other thing I think you might do is get Dr. Sarno's tapes....watching and listening to the principles together with reading them will give you three avenues for reaching your sub-conscious...which unlike you conscious mind is slower to get it....but get it it will! |
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tennis tom
USA
4749 Posts |
Posted - 03/01/2005 : 09:25:44
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Well said AlmostThere! |
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almost there
109 Posts |
Posted - 03/01/2005 : 12:58:25
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Tennis Tom- High praise coming from you.....thank you! |
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