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mala

Hong Kong
774 Posts

Posted - 09/25/2012 :  06:14:51  Show Profile  Reply with Quote
Headache now for 4 days. Don't know whether its neck or jaw or tooth or what any more. Only know this is bad. Tha pain has worked its way up.

Can't eat, even walking hurts, can't do anything.

Mala



Honestly, I sometimes really get fed up with my subconscious. It's like it's got a mind of its own.

Alexei Sayle

Edited by - mala on 09/25/2012 06:15:59

balto

839 Posts

Posted - 09/25/2012 :  08:24:26  Show Profile  Reply with Quote
The more you fight it, the more it will hurt Mala. Try acceptance. Acceptance is one of the most powerful technique to overcome many of life's hardship and pain. Just sit in a relaxing place, close your eyes. Have a half smile on like a buddha on your face. Don't try to control anything. Don't try to control your breathing. Just breath.
- When you breath in say it softly: Breath in, I'm living.
- When you breath out, say: Breath out, I'm smilling.
- My pain will go away, I will be fine.
Do it for half an hour when you wake up and half an hour before bed. It take some practice but after a few days your over active mind will calm down, you will take back control of your mind and life will be much easier.

We communicate with the world through our 5 senses. Hearing, seeing, smelling, touching, tasting. With million years of successful evolution changes to help human survived, our senses sometime bypass our mind and instruct our brain to react, to put up a defense when they sensed something dangerous. The ears heard some loud noise, the eyes saw a big tiger, the nose smell some rotted egg smell, the hand felt something slimy in the dard, the tongue tasted something bitter in the food... Instantly we would jump, run and hide, cover our nose, pull back our hand, spit out the food... we do it instantly without any input from our mind. That is why many other species went extinct and human survived for million years. Our five senses protected us too well. Even into modern day, the 5 senses still working overtime to protect us from "false" dangers.

We feel the pain and we instantly thought we are in danger, our body tensed up, our heart pumped quicker to push blood to all part of our body, all kind of stress hormones is released into the blood stream, our body is ready for a big fight.
Your fear continued, your body continue to tensed, your heart continue to work overtime, your stress hormone level continue to be high... and you continue to be in pain.

You need to accept the danger. You need to live with the pain for a while, you need to believe that it is not a real danger, it will pass when you can calm down. Talk to your mind. Explain to it that the pain is not dangerous, it will pass, it will go away when you can relax. It will TAKE TIME (time is very important, don't rush, don't get discourage, don't piss off, you need to give it time to work)
Our body is an amagine machince and it will listen to us. The mind need repetition. You need to talk to your mind often, with repetition of positive thoughts you will eventually take back control of your mind. It will not automaticly focus on the pain or what the pain mean anymore. Remember, affirmation need REPETITION to work.
So work with your mind. Use mindfulness meditation to relax, to calm down. Then use affirmation repetition to overcome your symptoms. It will work Mala. I have seen it worked thousand of times. The one that don't get well are those that gave up so soon.

------------------------
No, I don't know everything. I'm just here to share my experience.
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RageSootheRatio

Canada
430 Posts

Posted - 09/25/2012 :  08:45:13  Show Profile  Reply with Quote
Mala, I am sorry you are hurting so much and in so much pain.

I just want to add another perspective... that for SOME people (and I do not know who fits into this category and I am not saying that YOU do) ... but for SOME people who have a history of trauma, meditation (even if the intention is good) can actually trigger a REtraumatization episode, and turn out to be stressful and tension-INDUCING, rather than calming or relaxing.

I also would like to share something that Laurel Mellin (author of "Wired for Joy") said: "It can feel really stressful to try to feel joy when you are in the middle of a cortisol [stress] rush. It's kinda like telling yourself, when a lion is chasing you, that you should stop and smell the roses."

(just substitute the word "relaxation" for "joyful" and the basic idea remains the same: don't TRY to FEEL differently.)

At the same time, I agree with Balto that acceptance can be a huge key, and if I were in a similar situation to you, I'd be saying to myself: "I expect myself to be in pain. I expect myself to feel bad right now. I expect myself not to be able to eat. I expect it to hurt when I walk. I expect myself not to be able to do anything." (which would be the truth, and for ME those words/expectations would feel kind and accepting, and authentic.. which would relieve stress and allow me to move THROUGH the reality for me, of those moments...are there any words that you can say to yourself, that triggers even a slight relaxation response? ) AND at the same time I would be saying to myself, "do not judge myself or others; minimize the harm, take a break, do something kind for myself, and know it will pass. My job is just to keep myself safe and as comfortable as possible right now, until it passes." (some words I learned through the Emotional Brain Training program.)

I do hope you are able to feel some relief soon, be it through your own means, or by having the dentist help, or through meds ... or through a therapist (I think on one post a while back you said you would look for one when you got home? not sure if you managed to find someone suitable?) or just that something is able to help ...

RSR




Edited by - RageSootheRatio on 09/25/2012 08:46:30
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tennis tom

USA
4749 Posts

Posted - 09/25/2012 :  08:56:42  Show Profile  Reply with Quote
Hi Mala,

You know your TMS theory as well I do, it's time you chat with a TMS counselor. You can do it by phone. You just posted an excellent article by Will Baum for one, there's probably a link for contacting him in the article. I have talked with three TMS therapists for short periods and was comforted in being adjudged sane. I had several very good sessions with Dr. Schechter's therapist referral who appears on his cassettes, Dr. Donald Dubin, a beautiful man (and a tennis player BTW) who is unfortunately now deceased. I did a couple of sessions with him at his office when seeing Dr. Schechter in Beverly Hills. Dr. Dubin said the most he had to see a patient to convey the TMS message was a dozen sessions.

I understand you do not like to take meds and by inference you probably don't like to see therapists. But sometimes you got to do what you got to do. You have the money, the time and if need be you can travel to see one but I think by phone could possibly be as good.

Just my two cents, the lists of TMS practitioners are below in my sig.
G'luck
tt

==================================================

TMS PRACTITIONERS:
John Sarno, MD
400 E 34th St, New York, NY 10016
(212) 263-6035


Here's the TMS practitioners list from the TMS Help Forum:
http://www.tmshelp.com/links.htm

Here's a list of TMS practitioners from the TMS Wiki:
http://tmswiki.org/ppd/Find_a_TMS_Doctor_or_Therapist


Here's a map of TMS practitioners from the old Tarpit Yoga site, (click on the map by state for listings).:
http://www.tarpityoga.com/2007_08_01_archive.html

Edited by - tennis tom on 09/25/2012 08:57:57
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eric watson

USA
601 Posts

Posted - 09/25/2012 :  09:00:53  Show Profile  Reply with Quote
Mala these are awesome replys from balto, ragesootheratio and tennis tom -i am going to print out there replys shortly-although i feel for you mala-i also had the pain move to my head before it left my body-i really couldnt think or relax and hurt for about 30 hrs i finally got 2 goody powders for the migraine and within the hour it went away-i know this is masking the problem and you are a fighter but when asked what to do when we have a sudden pain attack even sarno said go to bed with a good book and a bottle of wine-were all a work in progress -i hope you get better soon -god bless

Edited by - eric watson on 09/25/2012 09:02:58
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tennis tom

USA
4749 Posts

Posted - 09/25/2012 :  09:06:41  Show Profile  Reply with Quote
Mala, here's Will Baum's contact info:

Will Baum, LCSW
Therapy in L.A.
www.willbaum.com

Contact Information

For questions or to make an appointment, please call (323) 610-0112 or write will@willbaum.com.

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Will Baum, LCSW
Psychotherapy | Los Angeles
Welcome
If you’re feeling overwhelmed, anxious or depressed, or are just wrestling with day-to-day life, working with an experienced therapist can be enormously helpful.

I see individuals and couples–teens and adults–helping sort through problems with relationships, family, friends, school, and work.

Call or write to discuss your situation and arrange an appointment time. I respond quickly to calls and emails.

Areas of Focus

Anxiety and Depression

Relationships/Family (Dating, Couples Therapy, Pre-Marital Counseling, Marriage Counseling, Parenting, Co-Parenting, Coping with Divorce)

Stress-Related Chronic Pain and Illness

Addiction Recovery

On This Site

For more about me and about psychotherapy in general, try browsing the site:

About – A little about my background and how I do therapy.

Blog – New posts regularly, including reposts from my blogs on the Huffington Post and Psychology Today.

Reading & Resources – Potentially useful books and workbooks, phone numbers, and websites.

Offices – Directions to my office in Los Feliz, easily reached from just about anywhere in Los Angeles.

Also on the site, Crisis Coping from A to Z, a series of articles about ways to get through a crisis.
Contact Information

For questions or to make an appointment, please call (323) 610-0112 or write will@willbaum.com.

Share This
(323) 610-0112
will@willbaum.com



•About
•Blog
•Contact
• Offices
• Reading
• Resources

On the Web

Will Baum, LCSW • Psychotherapy with individuals and couples, teens, and adults. Therapy, marriage counseling. Get help for various mental health issues--anxiety, depression, relationship problems, stress, addiction recovery. Office in Los Feliz. Convenient from Silver Lake, Echo Park, Atwater Village, Glendale, Eagle Rock, Mt. Washington, Glassell Park, Downtown L.A., USC, Hollywood, West Hollywood, Studio City, Los Angeles. Licensed therapist. For comments, questions, or to arrange an appointment, write will@willbaum.com or call (323) 610-0112.
Will Baum, LCSW
Therapy, Psychotherapy, Counseling | Los Feliz
4448 Ambrose Ave., Los Angeles, 90027
Licensed Clinical Social Worker (LCS25970)
will@willbaum.com
(323) 610-0112


Edited by - tennis tom on 09/25/2012 09:14:22
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Ace1

USA
1040 Posts

Posted - 09/25/2012 :  11:47:16  Show Profile  Reply with Quote
Mala, Baltos is saying something very important and is the key to recovery is to accept the pain. You also have to put yourself in normal situations in other words, you should never restrict yourself in a general basis, accept the pain as temporary and use affiramtions nad relaxation (not in a form of fighting the symtpoms, but just to achieve relaxation to its own end). Remember no fight, but also no restriction generally speaking. try to be a normal as possible without using a painful part more or less than someone normally would wheither it hurts or not without feeding it more tension. If something keeps upseting you in your life (spouse? or work?), this definately is additive to a perfectionist personality and can result in a much worse day soon after for a peroid of time
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Ace1

USA
1040 Posts

Posted - 09/25/2012 :  11:50:48  Show Profile  Reply with Quote
forgot to mention, exercise for the sake of good health (not for challenging symtpoms) to were you get to the point of being exhausted is helpful. It somehow helps to burn away tension. If your not exercising reguarly in this manner, it may help you
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tennis tom

USA
4749 Posts

Posted - 09/25/2012 :  17:49:20  Show Profile  Reply with Quote
Ace1, those are good TMS suggestions but Mala has put out TMS HELP SOS's a number of times here. I believe you mentioned you had talked with Dr. Sarno's head therapist (no pun intended), do you think given Mala's TMS history here it may be time for her to consult with one? She is adverse to even taking rx meds and probably fears the stigma associated with seeking help from a therapist.

The best time to see a therapist is probably when we are feeling good about ourselves but that probably never happens in the real world. Ace1, do you think therapy by phone can be effective since there are no TMS practitioners in Hong Kong where she resides?
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andy64tms

USA
589 Posts

Posted - 09/25/2012 :  18:54:13  Show Profile  Reply with Quote
Hi Mala,

Last week you gave me some valuable guidance on diet and bodyweight. It was extremely helpful and I appreciate it very much. More so now that I realize you were in pain while doing so. I see your pain is much worse than mine. You spend a lot of time on this forum.

I would recommend attending a workshop perhaps with Georgie Oldfield in UK, and then corresponding on a personal level over the web. I think here you are getting distracted from what you really need at your pain level. You have more knowledge than most, as can be seen in your helpful posts and that wonderful poem. I think you just need to be shown how to apply it. Please accept this suggestion as coming from my heart, as I think it also applies to me! I have an innate desire to keep looking at the forum as if it is Facebook or some kind of club.

Others are also suggesting a TMS therapist, so this is a powerful message we are all sending.


Andy
Past TMS Experience in 2000, with success.
Back on Wiki Edu Program day 12
Charlie Horse on neck for 20 years. (to be evicted later.)
Books:
Healing Back Pain
Unlearn your Pain
The Great Pain Deception
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balto

839 Posts

Posted - 09/25/2012 :  19:09:42  Show Profile  Reply with Quote
If going to another country for therapy is not something you want to do at the moment, I highly recommend you give meditation a try. There is an organization that provide free 10 course all over the world, there is one in Hong Kong too. Take a look at there website and see if you can spend sometime taking the course. http://www.dhamma.org/en/
The course is taught for free, even the foods and drinks are free. Here is world wide locations: http://www.dhamma.org/en/alphalist.shtml
The Buddha taught it. Thich Nhat Hanh, the Dalai lama, Dr Herbert Benson and countless others have said it will improve and change our health and our mind for the better. It's our life, we need to take back control of it and meditation is one of the way to do that.

------------------------
No, I don't know everything. I'm just here to share my experience.
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mala

Hong Kong
774 Posts

Posted - 09/26/2012 :  02:27:08  Show Profile  Reply with Quote
Thank you all for yr replies. I will post in detail later.

About accepting or carrying on. I am confused.

Today I have to see see a play. Tickets were bought ages ago. My friends know how I am feeling and tell me not to worry if I can't make it.

I feel rotten. Should i accept that I can't go & just be happy with that or challenge myself & get going .

I feel the pressure of making a choice one way or the other.

Mala

Honestly, I sometimes really get fed up with my subconscious. It's like it's got a mind of its own.

Alexei Sayle
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balto

839 Posts

Posted - 09/26/2012 :  03:13:18  Show Profile  Reply with Quote
And, behold, they brought to him a man sick of the palsy, lying on a bed: and Jesus seeing their faith said unto the sick of the palsy; Son, be of good cheer; thy sins be forgiven thee....Arise, and take up thy bed, and go unto thy house. And he arose, and departed to his house.

But Jesus turning and seeing her said, Daughter, be of good cheer; thy faith hath made thee whole. And the woman was made whole from that hour.
Matthew 9

Have fun Mala, forget your earthly body for a while, it will do you good.

“Only a life lived for others is a life worthwhile.”
—Albert Einstein
------------------------
No, I don't know everything. I'm just here to share my experience.

Edited by - balto on 09/26/2012 03:42:18
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RageSootheRatio

Canada
430 Posts

Posted - 09/26/2012 :  07:29:11  Show Profile  Reply with Quote
I think there is a big distinction to be made between TECHNIQUES (ie behaviors we can do) and OBJECTIVES (what we are actually trying to accomplish.) And I think that is where some of the confusion comes in the varying (conflicting?!) bits of advice.

For example: I think that the following are "techniques": meditation, visualization, going on a holiday, breathing techniques (many different ones), affirmations, positive self-talk, meds, just going about doing things "normally," even TMS therapy or TMS-specific workshops, mindfulness meditation, mindfulness living, going to a play, taking a break, etc etc etc ... ALL of these in my mind, are just activities/ techniques, behaviors, ALL OF WHICH CAN BE DONE IN A STRESSFUL, STRAINFUL, INEFFECTIVE, UNHELPFUL WAY.

Nothing "works" for every person, to accomplish the REAL objective(s) in TMS treatment, which I have been seeing are various ways of FEELING BETTER, as stated in various ways (thanks all!) by:

ART: Peace. Acceptance. Laughter. Compassion (above all to oneself). A serene courage.

ACE1: Focus more on tension reduction and changing my intense reactions.
How do you relieve strain? Do you strain more and try to fight more? of course not. You relieve strain, by relaxation. Think of your symptoms as more of a strain than anything else, therefore everything done with your mind and body has to be done with ease, comfort, forgiveness and patience.

BALTO: I acknowledge that the symptoms will be with me for awhile until my emotion calm down and my mind is at peace.

STEVEO: I will try to lower my tension level.

About going to the play: As Ace1 has said: "I think if you are undergoing a very tense situation it would be countrrproductive at that point to just challenge pain as you are not taking care of the root." ... so would going to the play be CHALLENGING your pain? (something Ace has said has been generally counterproductive for himself and his patients.)

>I feel rotten. Should i accept that I can't go & just be happy with that or challenge myself & get going .

Do you think it would be more RELAXING and enjoyable to you, or just more STRESSFUL and tension-inducing? Do you think you would end up in more pain? Would you truly FEEL "just be happy" by accepting you "can't" go? (I am remembering Balto's post on the 90/10 rule... you can't change the 10% fact right now that you are in PAIN, but the other 90%? How do we handle the 90% we DO control to reduce the STRAIN we are feeling??) Which choice would reduce the strain more?

>I feel the pressure of making a choice one way or the other.

I have often felt that pressure, too in making choices for myself and now I see it as just another manifestation of how I am so tense and stressed within myself because even "simple" decisions cause me as much stress as true "life and death" decisions! I have to be "right", I can't make mistakes, etc etc. And all that just ramps up the stress and tension and STRAIN, and THAT is the "root" of the TMS ... and no amount of any helpful "TECHNIQUES" that are suggested are ever going to help me, if I am not meeting the OBJECTIVE of reducing the strain!

I also keenly noted Matthew's insight as to just WHAT is TMS:

MatthewNJ: "Take stock of your anger level on a scale of 1 - 10. Let's say it is a 9. Then try to evaluate what the "average" anger would be. EG: if 100 people experienced the same thing, what would their anger level be. Let's say a 3. Then the difference between 3 and 9 is TMS, not true anger."

Just reword this idea for your situation: "take stock of how difficult it is to make the decision to go the play or not, on a scale of 1-10. Let's say it is a 9. Then evaluate what the "average" difficulty would be. EG If 100 people were asked to make that decision, what level would the difficulty be?" Let's say a 3.

Then the difference between 3 and 9 is your TMS ramping up ! If it is going to be stressful either way, then that also shows how TMS can be ramped up, *no matter what we decide*... because the dis-ease, the tension is within our thinking, not our ACTIVITIES or behaviors ...

I have been getting a different "take" on TMS lately from many posts...(THANKS so much, everybody!) I solved my own chronic pain problem quite a few years ago, now, but as I try to go to the next level with my health, I am delving deeper into how to go about doing it with symptoms other than pain...

Mala, I hope something in here is helpful for you, too, and that you start to experience more calm and ease and peacefulness inside... no matter whether you go to the play or not!

TECHNIQUES are many and varied and perhaps endlessly suggested, but the TRUE OBJECTIVE– to reduce strain and feel calm and peacefulness inside, is what we are truly trying to accomplish ... right? ??

RSR


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Ace1

USA
1040 Posts

Posted - 09/26/2012 :  11:00:29  Show Profile  Reply with Quote
So rsr, I really didn't read your entire post so I may be missing something. When I said not to challenge the pain, I mean go and use a painful part over and over to show it you are going to win with force etc. On the other hand you still have to act normal and do things like normal people. So I am NOT suggesting you restrict a certain part but just use it normally, don't take your weight off of a painful leg, don't avoid it's use , but use it normally. This will naturally lead to pain, but this is the pain that balto talks about accepting. You have to embrace the effected part as part of your normal body and it will be used like the rest without special focus or consideration even it it hurts. Then work on the tension as I have mentioned. If you don't do it this way you still perpetuate the pain. TT, I'm not sure about the therapist thing, I don't think it can hurt, but in my own case I don't think a therapist would have helped me. Mala, is probably doing one of three things wrong: she is not doing the affirmations and visualization on a regular enough basis or she is not monitoring her inner reactions all day. She also may be challenging or restricting too much. If she is doing everything, then she hasn't given it enough time. She should go with her friends try to act normal don't restrict, it will hurt, but she is just being normal not challenging so with practice and living your life this way it should start to fade. A therapist maybe helpful if she has no idea what's bothering her
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andy64tms

USA
589 Posts

Posted - 09/26/2012 :  13:43:46  Show Profile  Reply with Quote
Hi Mala,

Balto mentioned the five senses including touching. Have you had your husband give you a good old “head scratch”? Depending on your type of headache this might be beneficial in more ways than you can imagine.

I scratch my wife’s back every night for about an 1/2 hour or so. Usually she falls asleep. When she has a headache, I also scratch and massage her scalp. I benefit from this as well, as I find it very soothing. Without words or vision, the power of touch that SteveO discussed in his book has the ability to bring our equilibriums in line and reduce our tension.


Andy
Past TMS Experience in 2000, with success.
Back on Wiki Edu Program day 12
Charlie Horse on neck for 20 years. (to be evicted later.)
Books:
Healing Back Pain
Unlearn your Pain
The Great Pain Deception

Edited by - andy64tms on 09/26/2012 22:55:49
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mala

Hong Kong
774 Posts

Posted - 09/27/2012 :  04:51:29  Show Profile  Reply with Quote
Thank you all for yr posts. I did drag my sorry little ass to the play & while it was very enjoyable, I have to admit I was tense the whole evening. We had drinks and dinner before & I had a Mojito & tried to chitchat with everyone but was very very conscious of my discomfort. Many times during the evening I told myself to relax & enjoy myself but even when there are moments the pain is not so bad I am nervous just anticipating it.

I was quite sad too. I have a lovely group of girl friends that I have known for over 25 years & I was always the one that would have people in splits of laughter regaling them with things that had happened to me. I was the unconventional one among us all & things always ‘happened to me’. I guess it was coz I lived more & had more experiences than they dared to have but yesterday I realized that I was a former shadow of myself. I didn’t say much mostly coz of the pain I was in. I think they all noticed it too.

Balto, as usual you are spot on about accepting the pain & intellectually I understand what you are saying. I tried the little breathing technique that you wrote about but honestly when I was in pain I couldn’t focus. So I have looked at the link that you sent about the meditation course & I am enrolling in the one in Oct. The latest one started 2 days ago. But Gosh they do have a strict adherence to all kinds of rules.

RSR, wow 2 excellent posts. I liked your idea about accepting the pain & saying that its OK to be in pain. It feels much better than shouting at it and moaning about it which does cause more stress. I actually did that. Again impatience kicked it & I was cursing it . Its like the breathing & meditation. I give up very easily which is a reflection of the type of person I am. Impatient.

Making decisions is hard for me coz I want to be in control of both situations. All situations. I want this & I want that! Sigh!! Again that is who I am. There is no doubt I am ramping up the pain as you say becoz of the way I am.

TT , you are so right about ‘knowing my stuff’ You know if there was a written exam on TMS I bet I would get a distinction. God knows I’ve been at this for a long time. Sadly though I have failed miserably in applying the knowledge to help myself And I realize that this is where I need help. Thx for the info on Will Baum. You will be pleased to know that I have found someone here and although he is not TMS trained it doesn’t matter. I will mention it to him & we can take it from there.

Ace1 I am doing normal things like walking & driving even though they cause some discomfort . They are both things I enjoy & don’t want to give up. About accepting the pain as temporary, I have a lot of trouble with that. I find it hard to believe becoz whenever I get a pain, it becomes chronic. I know people who have pains, they take some pills, do some therapy & they are back to normal . I have a cousin in the Indian Army. He's a Major & flies helicopters. 3 months ago his chopper crashed from a height of about 400 metres. His co pilot died & he sustained v serious injuries including ruptured spleen, broken bones. I spoke to him last week & he told me he has no pain whatsoever now. With me once the pain starts, it doesn’t go way. It becomes permanent. Its always there no matter what, So the concept of temporary is very hard for me to accept.

Andy, Sheila is very lucky to have someone like you. That you will scratch her back for an hour is amazing. Robert will at most give me a minute & then lose interest. My helper Sharon who lives with us will always give me a rub when I need it though which is a huge luxury. And BTW I have found someone in HK whom I can have sessions with .

Hey Eric, thx for yr wishes. I do take a painkiller when I really have bad pain but you are right, alcohol actually works better.

Guys I’m really lucky. Thank you all for concern, quick replies & advice. It is very very much appreciated.

Mala


Honestly, I sometimes really get fed up with my subconscious. It's like it's got a mind of its own.

Alexei Sayle

Edited by - mala on 09/27/2012 04:56:12
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tennis tom

USA
4749 Posts

Posted - 09/27/2012 :  07:25:55  Show Profile  Reply with Quote
"With me once the pain starts, it doesn’t go way. It becomes permanent. Its always there no matter what, So the concept of temporary is very hard for me to accept."

Mala, just a quick comment on your above statement. This sounds like fibro/TMS, a deeper form of TMS but TMS none the less. To me that would be good because it is NOT structural but benign, "curable" TMS. Good you will be seeing a therapist, though not TMS trained. Make sure the therapist is on-board with the TMS strategy or find another one. You are the boss in this, if you feel they aren't talking the TMS talk, bail and interview others. You can always do the phone consult or plan a trip around a TMS holiday to see a TMS doc and some sessions with a TMS therapist.
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Birdie78

Germany
145 Posts

Posted - 09/27/2012 :  08:06:48  Show Profile  Reply with Quote
With me once the pain starts, it doesn’t go way. It becomes permanent. Its always there no matter what, So the concept of temporary is very hard for me to accept.

Mala, I exactly know how you feel. Most of my pain never disappeard and became chronic, so it's a pain-map all over my body in the meantime. I think it's that kind of thinking-pattern that fuels TMS-symptoms. When I am in (a new) pain my first thought - like a reflex - usually is "oh my God I assume this pain will became chronic because all of my other pain became chronic, too. I must be under a witch's spell, one more pain I'll have to live with".
It's very hard to change this pattern but I do my very best to tell me there's no reason to be in fear, it's nothing serious, it's only TMS and of course it will disappear when I try to figure out what the symptom wants to tell my. I've already been successfull with some kind of "harmless" pain that suddenly pops up from nowhere and that gives me some hope that once a time I'll be successfull in treating my chronic pain (permanent condition without one painfree day since 1996).
One of my medicines called me Mrs. "Avoidance" , I guess the guy's right. Always tried to avoid pain, to avoid fear, to avoid sadness...to avoid failing, to be continued. In my case first accepting and then to let go will be the key instead of avoidance and wanting to get rid of all that immediately! As long as I can remember I used to practice this kind of catastrophying and it will take some time to gradually transform this into more positive thinking patterns. Perhaps years, who knows (I am an impatient person, too )

Wish you luck, Mala!

Kind regards from Germay sends Birdie

Edited by - Birdie78 on 09/27/2012 08:14:30
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andy64tms

USA
589 Posts

Posted - 09/27/2012 :  12:17:16  Show Profile  Reply with Quote
Hi Mala,

I am glad you are seeking help on a personal level.

In the interest of TMS truth I have to say I scratch Sheila’s back for about ½ hour. I forgot the ½.

When she has had enough she often says: “I’m going to bite you”. This may sound strange, but we have a “princess cat” that bites us when she has had enough scratching.

Good luck


Andy
Past TMS Experience in 2000, with success.
Back on Wiki Edu Program day 12
Charlie Horse on neck for 20 years. (to be evicted later.)
Books:
Healing Back Pain
Unlearn your Pain
The Great Pain Deception

Edited by - andy64tms on 09/27/2012 12:21:07
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Ace1

USA
1040 Posts

Posted - 09/27/2012 :  13:10:14  Show Profile  Reply with Quote
mala, i think it would be helpful to take out the signature that affirms to that your fed up withn your unconscience, it is the opposite of how I would like you to approach this. Also work on patience and see if you can go to a high mountain by yourself and see if you can just sit there and enjoy nature for 2 hrs by yourself, You will want to leave after 15min, but see if you can recondition yourself to patience.
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