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mala
Hong Kong
774 Posts |
 Posted - 06/07/2012 : 06:33:33
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Why is it now the back pain is slightly better, the shoulder & neck are giving me a really hard time. Is it just that when one pain is more that you don't notice the other pain?
What is this pain trying to tell me?
Arrrrrgggggg when will this end? It is wearing me down. 
Good Luck & Good Health
Mala |
Edited by - mala on 06/07/2012 06:33:59 |
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Goodney
USA
76 Posts |
Posted - 06/07/2012 : 07:17:23
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Mala:
I know exactly how you feel. When my back is feeling better, my neck acts up and vice versa. When my back AND neck are feeling a bit better, my hip or knee will act up. It's all the mind trying to distract you from your life and have you focus on your body instead. Movement of symptoms is classic TMS. |
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drh7900
USA
194 Posts |
Posted - 06/07/2012 : 07:52:27
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It's a matter of your brain making every attempt to keep you distracted. Don't let it win...focus on the emotions instead of the pain. I find my pain moving around, too...and I consider that success since it's evidence that my brain is catching on that I'm catching on. It's frustrating...but it's progress :)
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Dustin |
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shari
USA
85 Posts |
Posted - 06/07/2012 : 09:58:31
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| Mala, I'm surprised that despite all your efforts your pain is still persisting. It makes me wonder if it's really TMS. Have you had a bone density check lately? My mother who was also Asian (Japanese) suffered for years of back pain before she finally went to see a doctor and found out she had osteoporosis. Her pain went away after she was put on medication. |
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Dave
USA
1864 Posts |
Posted - 06/07/2012 : 10:39:27
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quote:
Originally posted by malaWhat is this pain trying to tell me?
Hi Mala.
Variation in location and severity of symptoms is a hallmark of TMS.
You've been at this a long time, and it seems you have a solid understanding and acceptance of your TMS, yet from time to time the symptoms still have tremendous power over you. I beleive this is typical for many TMS sufferers. We are highly susceptible to recurrences and must always be ready to fight.
The other day as I was bending over I had a very sharp pain in a part of my back where I had never really felt pain before. I believe the initial reaction to the pain is critical. In the past I might have gotten concerned, focused on it, taken Advil immediately, and hope it does not get worse. Now, I simply say to myself, "Hmm... this is interesting. I wonder what I might be repressing?" I laugh and say "nice try, TMS, but it's not going to work." I go about my day. The pain continues but I don't pay any attention to it. When I'm aware of it I think about what might be bothering me that I'm not dealing with. By afternoon the pain was gone.
Even now I have a slight pain in my neck. It is uncomfortable but I know it is nothing to worry about. Just another manifestation of some emotional baggage. I go over events of the past couple of days, conversations with my loved ones, stuff going on at work that may be troubling me, etc. I know that the neck pain will fade on its own.
My point is, many TMS sufferers have to deal with this for the rest of their lives. Some will tell you that if you are not "pain free" then it must not be TMS, or Dr. Sarno's treatment doesn't work. That is a cop out. It works not because it eliminates the pain forever, but because it eliminates the power of the pain to control your thoughts and behaviors.
It is not easy to get through these episodes. I can only tell you that as time goes on, they happen less often, are of lower intensity, and shorter duration. Perhaps one day I will be 100% free of these episodes, but I doubt it. In any case, it does not matter. The pain has no effect on my ability to live my life the way that I want to. And IMO, that is a more important goal than eliminating the pain completely (which may be difficult if not impossible).
What is the pain trying to tell you? That is completely up to you to try to figure out. Try your best. You will never know if you are right, but it is the trying that counts. |
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art
1903 Posts |
Posted - 06/07/2012 : 11:33:00
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Hey Mala,
I don't know you very well from the board, so I'm not sure if your question is real or rhetorical.
IN my humble opinion, you're complicating matters to your own detriment. Forget about what your pain is trying to tell you. It's not trying to tell you anything, it's simply a manifestation of stress.
I and many others around here have had much good success by simply finding ways to stop worrying. It doesn't appear to me based on your last few posts that you've worked on that angle.
Look, I identify completely with your pain and frustration. I've been going through a rough patch myself. But you simply must find a way to train yourself to react to your pain differently. Fearing it, worrying about it, anticipating it, that's the real illness. I can virtually guarantee that if you start approaching your TMS from the standpoint of trying to relax and accept, you'll improve greatly. |
Edited by - art on 06/07/2012 11:34:13 |
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mala
Hong Kong
774 Posts |
Posted - 06/07/2012 : 17:23:11
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Thanks Guys OK then
1) Dave, How do you go about yr day with pain. I do it and its so tiring, so draining emotionally & physically. Maybe we are not talking about the same intensity of pain.
2) Art What do you do & how do you train yourself to react to yr pain differently. Can you give me some examples. You also said accept & relax. Can you elaborate with some examples.
Good Luck & Good Health
Mala |
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art
1903 Posts |
Posted - 06/08/2012 : 12:17:43
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quote:
Originally posted by mala
Thanks Guys OK then
2) Art What do you do & how do you train yourself to react to yr pain differently. Can you give me some examples. You also said accept & relax. Can you elaborate with some examples.
Good Luck & Good Health
Mala
Mala,
If you're anything like me, your first reaction to pain is fear and worry. Fear and worry are emotions (destructive, tms inducing emotions) that cannot exist without
certain physical concomitants such a shallow breathing, a tightened gut, contracting muscles, a sensation of heat and actual sweating etc etc. Next time you feel pain, tune into these feelings and sensations. Identify them for what they are, and understand that to a great extent they're something you can control be deep breathing, muscular relaxation, and reassuring self talk. Keep doing this, and pretty soon it will become fairly automatic. This is what I mean by retraining yourself...
I also advocate taking a larger, more selfless, some might say spiritual view of the world. We get so wrapped up in our own pain that we forget that others suffer, many of them far more than we. We have to remember that we're flesh and blood, and thus subject to injury, illness, and ultimately death. When we repress this knowledge, we pay a high price in increased symptoms and a never-ending, gnawing fear, like a worm eating away at our hearts. The only authentic freedom from this terrible, self-destructive fear is acceptance of certain of life's unpleasant realities...
I could go on and on, but that's the general idea..
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shawnsmith
Czech Republic
2048 Posts |
Posted - 06/08/2012 : 17:00:04
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quote:
Originally posted by Dave
quote:
Originally posted by malaWhat is this pain trying to tell me?
My point is, many TMS sufferers have to deal with this for the rest of their lives. Some will tell you that if you are not "pain free" then it must not be TMS, or Dr. Sarno's treatment doesn't work. That is a cop out. It works not because it eliminates the pain forever, but because it eliminates the power of the pain to control your thoughts and behaviors.
I think what Dave has written here is quite profound and worth pondering over. We who suffer from various TMS related symptoms may be putting pressure on ourselves to be totally pain free before we can say we have recovered when in fact the first step, as Dave notes, is to "eliminate the power of the pain to control your thoughts and behaviors." Sadly, the symptoms tend to overtake us at times and we sabotage our efforts. I am guilty as charged in that respect. |
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Hillbilly
USA
385 Posts |
Posted - 06/08/2012 : 22:07:26
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There is a point at which a person becomes willing to have their pain or gurgling gut or dizziness or weak legs. This is the point at which they go away. It is an amazing thing to allow yourself to suffer, which by definition is its antithesis, which ends it forever. The reason you suffer is because you are unwilling to have these symptoms. If you were, you wouldn't have them. This isn't some mantra chant from eastern religion, but a fact that you can live in your own life. Be willing to suffer and you end all suffering. Think that over. Invite your pain to increase, and you will see that it will diminish.
Once you have reached a point where nothing can affect you in the way it now does, you will be rid of the pain forever. It will have no purpose in continuing. You won't dread it. You won't pine for it to be gone. You will have figured out that it is, as Art states, a manifestation of stress, which only grows as you add your own reactive stress to it. Without this reaction, it is a normal occurrence, no different than sweating out a sports game on the couch.
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"Failures do what is tension relieving, while winners do what is goal achieving."
Dennis Waitley
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Edited by - Hillbilly on 06/08/2012 22:11:08 |
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art
1903 Posts |
Posted - 06/09/2012 : 09:41:18
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quote:
Originally posted by Hillbilly
There is a point at which a person becomes willing to have their pain or gurgling gut or dizziness or weak legs. This is the point at which they go away. It is an amazing thing to allow yourself to suffer, which by definition is its antithesis, which ends it forever. The reason you suffer is because you are unwilling to have these symptoms. If you were, you wouldn't have them. This isn't some mantra chant from eastern religion, but a fact that you can live in your own life. Be willing to suffer and you end all suffering. Think that over. Invite your pain to increase, and you will see that it will diminish.
Once you have reached a point where nothing can affect you in the way it now does, you will be rid of the pain forever. It will have no purpose in continuing. You won't dread it. You won't pine for it to be gone. You will have figured out that it is, as Art states, a manifestation of stress, which only grows as you add your own reactive stress to it. Without this reaction, it is a normal occurrence, no different than sweating out a sports game on the couch."
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"Failures do what is tension relieving, while winners do what is goal achieving."
Dennis Waitley
This is all very well said. Ultimately, and I think Hillbilly would agree, it doesn't matter what your process i, or how you get there. Deep breathing, acceptance, paying no attention, helpful self-talk of whatever kind, all leading to the same thing, a freedom from fear and worry which is all that's required of you.
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Dave
USA
1864 Posts |
Posted - 06/11/2012 : 11:25:27
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quote:
Originally posted by mala
1) Dave, How do you go about yr day with pain. I do it and its so tiring, so draining emotionally & physically. Maybe we are not talking about the same intensity of pain.
I do not generally gauge the level of pain anymore, but it is such that I barely notice it and go about my day.
I understand it is much more difficult to ignore when the pain is substantial. All you can do is take pain killers if you need them, and do the best you can to ignore it.
The pain serves a purpose. You need to give it a different purpose. Consider it a gentle reminder that you need to take care of your emotional state, that there may be something going on in your life that you are pushing down and not fully appreciating. "Thank" the pain for reminding you to address your psychological health. Push through your day as best as you can, including any physical activity you may be avoiding specifically due to the pain.
At some point, hopefully you will reach the point where you truly accept that the pain is benign and safe to ignore. This belief must occur at a deep level. It must be ingrained into your consciousness by reconditioning your thoughts and behaviors. For some this takes a significant amount of time.
Anyone can lose 20 lbs. by going on a strict diet. But most gain it back. Some gain back even more than they lost. The only way to keep it off is to change the way you eat and exercise permanently. The TMS battle is similar. Many will get fast relief when they first learn about it and start the reconditioning process, only to have recurrences and symptom substitution that could be even worse than the initial symptoms. They fall back into the trap of thinking physical. Permanent relief requires a fundamental change in the way you view the symptoms and react to them. |
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Plantweed
USA
109 Posts |
Posted - 12/18/2012 : 13:26:01
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quote:
Originally posted by Hillbilly
Invite your pain to increase, and you will see that it will diminish.
This is so true!
My turning point was confronting my pain. "Gimme all you got!" Once I suspected it was anxiety-related and not physical, I went out and did what most feared: Iyengar yoga! No more "babying" the back! Stretch that mother, and work it, and bend it, and stress it!
(((((poof))))
After a few once-a-week sessions, no more back pain. 3+ years later and life is good. Still doing yoga and loving it.
And I stress, the physical benefits are awesome, but they are a side benefit. The main benefit is my body telling itself, You can do this, see? No problem. |
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Ragdoll
4 Posts |
Posted - 12/19/2012 : 05:02:14
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I don't mean to hijack your post, Mala, but I found this thread fascinating. Hope you feel better. It's all a little easier said than done, but I'm going to try some of the suggestions made here. I had a bad spell last night. Had to run out out late for a last minute gift, and in the store was overcome with back and leg pain, it was all I could do to drive home, and once home it still didn't let up. I'm sure it was just the stress of the season and some personal stuff I've been mulling over. But it does scare me, it's hard to say bring it on when you are driving a car and not sure you can use the gas and brake pedals effectively. But in the end I did get home, I did get some sleep. I feel better this morning. So ignore the pain, acknowledge the source of the pain (stress, worry, etc). Is that it? One can't often make the source go away, but the idea is to deal with it with your mind and not your body?
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shawnsmith
Czech Republic
2048 Posts |
Posted - 12/19/2012 : 07:30:21
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quote:
Originally posted by mala
What is this pain trying to tell me?
The fact of the matter is, you may never know the exact answer to your question other than on a general level. You may go to a therapist or psychoanalyze yourself for years and years and still not know. I think it is sufficient to know, and possess a solid conviction that your pain is due either to past trauma, personality characteristics which places pressure on yourself or stressors you are currently encountering. Armed with this knowledge, you have to resume normal activity. Yes, it hurts like hell and you may feel at time you have been run over by a tank, but this step is absolutely necessary. And don't place too much pressure on yourself to heal within a particular time frame as this impedes progress. Every TMS writer stresses this important point. Continue to daily read Sarno and SteveO's books with a view to building up confidence. |
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