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Darko

Australia
387 Posts

Posted - 03/12/2012 :  17:50:58  Show Profile  Reply with Quote
Hi folks,
thought I might post what I have recently been through. For a while now I have been having a great run with very little if any pain at night. When things get funky in my body I simply do the work and the situation improves. I have had some major relationship issues for a while. Things are good now but there has been lots of damage from the past and I realized that I can't get intimate with my girlfriend. Not sure exactly why, but I just don't really want to and I dont know if its because I don't love her anymore or that I'm carrying a large amount of upset from things in the past.

Once I identified this on Sunday night I found myself feeling very sad and depressed on Monday...which I just allowed. Monday night I didn't have a good night and woke up pretty sore during the night.....which means I now have got some work to do.

The point of it all? I guess even when you think you have the thing "sorted" it will still throw you a curve ball so you must always remain dynamic. It seems to me that the closer you get to dealing with an issue or repressed emotion or something you have been avoiding, the more likely you will have the symptoms get turned up on you.

This can be very confusing as it can make one think that you are on the wrong path when youre not.

Stick with it peeps and never be in reaction to the symptoms.......Stay the path and do the work and never be afraid of an increase in symptoms. This is simply the mind trying to protect or maintain the habit of avoidance.....be it something from the past or present.

Might I also add the closer to get to confronting an issue the more negativity/anxiety there is in your head......this will always create more pain as it leads to more negative emotions. Its easy to see why we can remain trapped....because confronting an issue can be very complicated and it's easy to become lost in ones head.

Keep focused!

D

bryan3000

USA
513 Posts

Posted - 03/12/2012 :  19:47:01  Show Profile  Reply with Quote
Great as always, Darko!

This would have been a great response to Russ' post about going back to work. I hope he sees it.

Good luck with your issues. Going through a divorce right now, myself.
It's just been a bang-up couple of years for me! :)

But, better days lay ahead. Thanks for the pointers!

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Back2-It

USA
438 Posts

Posted - 03/12/2012 :  21:11:21  Show Profile  Reply with Quote
quote:
Originally posted by Darko


Things are good now but there has been lots of damage from the past and I realized that I can't get intimate with my girlfriend. Not sure exactly why, but I just don't really want to and I dont know if its because I don't love her anymore or that I'm carrying a large amount of upset from things in the past.

It seems to me that the closer you get to dealing with an issue or repressed emotion or something you have been avoiding, the more likely you will have the symptoms get turned up on you.

This can be very confusing as it can make one think that you are on the wrong path when youre not.



Your situation reminds me of me. All the pains started with it. . Reunited with my GF after five years and then finding nothing had changed. Knew I still loved her, but the desire for intimacy was gone. Not only on my part but hers. I think that when something like sexuality, which goes to the core of your being, is off-kilter, it creates all sorts of problems. What a conflict of emotions, no? Where you love somebody, but something deep in the core changed where you no longer picture yourself intimate with the person. It's enough to twist a person in two.

Good luck with your situation. I have no advice to offer. You seem to have a good handle on what it means to you.

"Bridges Freeze Before Roads"

Edited by - Back2-It on 03/12/2012 21:13:29
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RussWarf

8 Posts

Posted - 03/13/2012 :  10:52:58  Show Profile  Reply with Quote
quote:
Originally posted by bryan3000


This would have been a great response to Russ' post about going back to work. I hope he sees it.





Indeed I have! And I agree - very encouraging. And, yes I begin work tomorrow, and as it gets closer, today my symptoms are still amplifying - but posts like this help me to keep fear at bay, which is the most important thing.
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