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heelsdown
USA
49 Posts |
 Posted - 11/09/2010 : 21:42:21
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I come across people almost daily who have tms-like symptoms and the personality to match. Right now, I do not say anything to them. Either because I do not know the person well enough, or think they won't be receptive, or am afraid they will think I am nuts and/or be offended at the "psychological" suggestion.
Right now, it just seems simpler to keep my mouth shut... and I don't think I'm really going to change that anytime soon. The problem is, when I don't tell people about it, I feel GUILTY. Like I am keeping a secret from them. I am intentionally NOT telling about something that could help them and change their life.
I guess the truth is many people would not consider tms even if I told them about it... but I still feel guilty. Does anyone else feel guilty about keeping their mouth shut?
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HellNY
130 Posts |
Posted - 11/10/2010 : 06:19:56
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I wouldnt feel guilty. I havent told everyone whose sufferred -- based on my sense that it is the last things theyd want to hear. We all need to be careful about 'TMS Evangelism'
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tennis tom
USA
4749 Posts |
Posted - 11/10/2010 : 11:20:21
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No don't feel guilty, that would be a TMS "goodist" trait, trying to save the world. It may take a while but you can retrain your mind to get rid of the bad feeling and habits and take on new ones that don't feed the TMS reservoir. Taking care of one's own business first before saving the world--an impossible task doomed to fail--would be one of them.
When one is new to TMS they can become proselytizers. You see TMS in everyone and it is there, because TMS is part of the "human condition". Some of us want fix it adding it to our medicine cabinet and move on to better things. Others want to hang onto it for protection and maybe they should. I just recalled a patient of Dr. Sarno's in one of his books, who the Good Doctor could not "cure". This patient's childhood was so screwed up he needed TMS as a defense mechanism, so why not use it as a "protector" as Dr. Sarno theorizes.
I find most people who come to this board don't want to really discuss TMS, they want to discuss THEIR symptom, perfectly normal. This is contrary to TMS but what ya' gonna' do? It takes a while, maybe a long while to wrap ones psyche around TMS theory. One's mind didn't get shaped overnight and it won't be re-conditioned instantly. That's the great thing about great ideas like TMS, they can change your mind and keep you from doing the same thing over and over again--mindlessly as it were.
I think I've rambled here--oh yah, telling folks about TMS? When it was new I did it, but less and less now. I've found that for TMS doctors, TMS is a very small part of their practice because their patients aren't at all interested in it. They want a quick, silver- bullet fix and they've learned to expect that from modern medicine-- fix this problem then on to the next distraction.
If I run in to someone who appears to be open-minded about such stuff as TMS, I may mention it. In about ten or more years of "TMS'ing" I think I've only met a few people who were interested enough to borrow a TMS book when I offered it. They're usually more open to aromatherapy. So I no longer feel guilty or not guilty, about telling someone about TMS because that would be a TMS Goodist trait and serve to fill up my TMS reservoir.
DR. SARNO'S 12 DAILY REMINDERS:
http://www.tmshelp.com/forum/topic.asp?TOPIC_ID=6415
TAKE THE HOLMES-RAHE STRESS TEST
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Holmes_and_Rahe_stress_scale
Some of my favorite excerpts from _THE DIVIDED MIND_ :
http://www.tmshelp.com/forum/topic.asp?TOPIC_ID=2605
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Edited by - tennis tom on 11/10/2010 11:37:57 |
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alexis
USA
596 Posts |
Posted - 11/13/2010 : 07:55:37
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On the other hand, you could be wrong about any individual case. Look up JimmyJimmy and vitamin D to see how damaging this could be. There's no reason to believe TMS diagnoses are right more often than any other diagnoses - its all just medicine, and we humans aren't experts yet.
Also I find people do better discovering alternate routes on their own. With an aquaintence if I really feel compelled (not often) usually I just say "A friend of mine had success with that using something called 'The Sarno Method' that he raves about. I don't know much about it though so I can't say what its about or anything."
Sure, its a lie...but being a puritanical goodist never got anyone anywhere in the TMS world. This way people get something to look up, and its not attached to you (you won't get flack). And most importantly, you haven't expressed even knowing it's a "psychological" theory, so you haven't claimed this person has a psychological issue. You can fess up later if it takes hold - which some times it does. |
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skizzik
USA
783 Posts |
Posted - 11/13/2010 : 09:39:29
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quote:
Originally posted by HellNY
I wouldnt feel guilty. I havent told everyone whose sufferred -- based on my sense that it is the last things theyd want to hear. We all need to be careful about 'TMS Evangelism'
yeah, just wait until crazy people beg to call you in dire pain, they will be begging for the sermon............has that ever happened to you hell? |
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art
1903 Posts |
Posted - 11/16/2010 : 17:05:18
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Along the lines of some of what Alexis said, I just don't feel comfortable presuming that someone's injury/pain is TMS. Maybe it is, maybe it isn't. Only the person himself, perhaps with the help of a qualified physician, can make that judgment. Even on the forum, I can't begin to count the number of encouraging posts I've written then on second thought deleted before putting up because I couldn't get that persistent "JimmyJimmy" image out of my mind.
All that said, a friend gave me Healing Back Pain years ago. I had no idea what TMS was prior to that. I read it, and was helped immeasurably by it.
So there you go. It is, it's fair to say, a complicated discussion.
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heelsdown
USA
49 Posts |
Posted - 11/17/2010 : 13:26:19
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Thanks for everyone's input! I guess it's right that we should never assume someone else's pain is tms. But isn't it true that most if not all chronic pain syndromes ARE tms? I just feel like sometimes I am certain that is it!! But of course, I may not know their full histories and what tests they have had done, etc.
I just searched "jimmyjimmy" to see what that was about... and that really stinks! So I can see how something can seem SO much like tms, but not be.
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wrldtrv
666 Posts |
Posted - 11/17/2010 : 19:55:43
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I have told people about TMS over the years and have even lent them my books. In those cases, I didn't hear anything for several weeks and then had to ask for the books back, most likely unread. I learned that unless someone asks for something, they probably don't really want it and may even resent you for offering it.
The second thing is that I often lack confidence in TMS myself so hesitate to pass it along to others. |
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Scottydog
United Kingdom
330 Posts |
Posted - 12/02/2010 : 08:15:15
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My experience is that no one takes any advice, suggestions or recommendations on anything to do with health unless it comes from someone in a white coat.
So there is no guilt about not recommending Sarno to people, just annoyance that you could give them some great advice but you know it's just not worth trying.
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Feel guilty keeping the tms "secret" from others
