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johnaccardi
USA
182 Posts |
 Posted - 12/07/2008 : 14:31:34
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Hi guys,
Just a quick question...
Throughout this TMS equivilant I have been conditioned against certain things that I used to enjoy, these things are
1. Kissing women - my mouth instantly goes completely dry
2. Drinking Alcohol - After as little as one drink I become sick, dizzy, dry mouth
These things I used to enjoy are now things I avoid. I want to try to reverse this conditioning. Will TMS theory (journaling, and reading) fix this eventually or should I be getting separate help for this?
Thanks a lot |
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Dor
67 Posts |
Posted - 12/08/2008 : 05:06:35
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Maybe these answers are quite simple and not conditioning at all.
Kissing - maybe just nervous kissing someone for the first time. Makes sense!
Drinking - maybe your body is saying that alchohol is not a good thing for you. Makes sense!
John, not everything is deep and dark. Instead of always looking for the hidden meaning or the deep answer, why not just give yourself the simple ones? Like - Oh for goodness sake, I am just nervous kissing a girl sometimes and that makes my mouth dry. Or - Yep, I haven't been drinking much lately, so sure alcohol is going to make me dizzy and sick. Looking to the simple, yet most often valid, answers gives yourself a new, positive, and healing perspective. Don't make everything so heavy - lighten it up, and you will feel yourself relax physically and mentally.
Dor |
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johnaccardi
USA
182 Posts |
Posted - 12/08/2008 : 06:56:43
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| I see what you mean Dor, but it's so different than it used to be. I never got dry mouth from kissing girls. Drinking alcohol used to feel so good. I'm just having a hard time thinking these new feelings are natural because these were very enjoyable things to do and then once the mouth symptoms hit me, they became very unenjoyable things to do. I think it might be just another way for my brain to distract, another reason for the symptom to grab my attention. |
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Dor
67 Posts |
Posted - 12/08/2008 : 12:37:37
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But see John, you never worried about dry mouth when kissing a girl before, and you never worried about feeling sick when drinking either. But, NOW you do! Why? Because the dry mouth scared you and almost every situation you put yourself in the fear rears its ugly head. Fear = dry mouth, a totally natural bodily reaction. The only thing you have conditioned yourself to is the fear. Lose the fear and you will be able to kiss again, drink again, and enjoy again. How to do that? By understanding that it is only fear, by telling yourself that you are fine physically, and by going through it and through it again and again until the fear goes away. Not by forcing or testing, but by just living and letting these situations arise, and telling yourself that you know what this is, it is not going to kill you, it is not going to damage you. It is going to be there for awhile. It is called "sensitization". But, just as you became sensitized, so can you become unsensitized. You are not Pavlov's dog!! You are a young man who got scared in certain situations and the fear took hold. I would be willing to bet there are lots of people who get dry mouth when kissing or sick from one drink. The difference is that they DO NOT worry about it. Grasp that concept and you are well on your way.
Dor |
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johnaccardi
USA
182 Posts |
Posted - 12/09/2008 : 10:29:42
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| I see what your saying Dor, I agree the fear is the problem. Once the fear fades away so will the bad feelings. |
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Dor
67 Posts |
Posted - 12/09/2008 : 11:16:42
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Smiling at you John. That is it exactly.
Dor |
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johnaccardi
USA
182 Posts |
Posted - 12/09/2008 : 20:06:25
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Another question...
When I journal, I think about the rage, and I know what contributes to the rage, and I know I have rage.
Now I want to focus on the unconscious reactions of emotional pain and sadness, does anyone have any advice for me as far as how to look into what is causing these reactions. Any clues in life that point to the existence of unconscious emotional pain and sadness? thanks. |
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Classical (Pavlovian) Conditioning
