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Elorac
United Kingdom
41 Posts |
Posted - 08/25/2008 : 13:56:44
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I have been diagnosed with TMS. My daughter does not believe in TMS, and I understand that, I can see that it sounds rather wacky to someone who isn't experiencing it. I know I can't make her believe, but it would give me a lot of support if she could get to the point of thinking, well ok, maybe it is real. Does anyone know of a celebrity with TMS? My daughter is in her early twenties, so it needs to be someone with a bit of kudos for someone of that age. Thanks in anticipation, Carole. |
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mizlorinj
USA
490 Posts |
Posted - 08/25/2008 : 14:27:24
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I'm surprised! It is usually older, more conditioned folks who cannot accept that their emotions can affect their bodies. I find younger people (my 19 year old son for one) more open to this thinking. So she doesn't believe in the mind/body connection? How about when your face turns red and heart pounds when you're nervous or embarrassed? That is how the body reacts to an emotion in that situation. Howard Stern was a patient of Dr. Sarno, as was actress Anne Bancroft. Go onto youtube.com and you'll find a few people who talk about their TMS experience--a newscaster I think was one. We can't make anyone else see it though. Even watching me go from bedridden to back to work in two weeks did not convince everyone in my family of TMS/equivalents/mind-body disorders.
Best wishes! |
Edited by - mizlorinj on 08/25/2008 14:41:39 |
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Scottydog
United Kingdom
330 Posts |
Posted - 08/25/2008 : 23:53:24
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Elorac,
Has she read Mind Body Prescription? The first 30 pages is enough to get a gist of what he is saying and she might recognise some of the emotional stressors as applying to herself.
Anne |
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armchairlinguist
USA
1397 Posts |
Posted - 08/26/2008 : 08:50:06
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I would not try to get her to believe if I were you. You might give her some info, but you don't want to end up fighting over this. You can't convince anyone of TMS who doesn't want to be convinced.
-- What were you expecting? |
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Elorac
United Kingdom
41 Posts |
Posted - 08/26/2008 : 10:20:51
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Thanks for the responses. My daughter lives at home with us, not in a financial position to move out yet. She has her own problems, mainly depression. I am always worrying about her and I now realise that this is the cause of a lot of my repressed emotions. There is bound to be a certain amount of friction with an adult child living at home, and when I feel stressed in my relationship with her ,whether it's directly because of her behaviour, or indirectly because of my worrying etc. I never feel that I can say to her what I would say if she wasn't depressed. I am always aware of not wanting to upset her and make her feel worse. The frustrating thing is that, now I know about TMS, I think that reading about it might help her. It's very annoying to be told by her that she doesn't believe in TMS when she hasn't even read the books. She has started to read MBP, only after I had a bit of an outburst last week because I was feeling stressed and she made the remark "You hurt your back and now you're cranky" She hadn't grasped the point that TMS pain is caused by emotions and that the physical diagnosis I was given was wrong. She thinks that the original physical diagnosis of "slipped disc" was right, and that the symptoms I still have now are psychosomatic. So, she does accept that the mind can cause symptoms in the body, but not to the extent of crippling back pain after bending down to pick something up. I know that I can't force anyone to believe about TMS, or read the books, but I myself am stuck at the point of believing that what I have now is TMS, but can't yet make the leap from that to believing 100% that my original "injury" was solely TMS. I know that I won't be able to completely lose my fear of bending etc. unless I can fully accept that. I do get the feeling that if it had been one of my daughters' friends maybe who had told her about TMS, instead of me, that she may not have questioned it. You know the kind of thing I mean, you tell your child that something is good for them and they just ignore it, but if a friend tells them the same thing they just accept it without question. That's why I was asking about celebrities with TMS, if someone that she admires was saying what I've been saying she would read the book from cover to cover in no time and be telling me how her depression is caused by TMS, and also the RSI that she thinks she is developing since she started her job working at a keyboard a year ago. Hope that wasn't too boring. I'm sure it probably strikes a chord with some of you. Thanks, Carole. |
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Elorac
United Kingdom
41 Posts |
Posted - 08/26/2008 : 10:42:02
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I forgot to mention, she thinks I am vulnerable and have been sucked into a cult!! |
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debbette
44 Posts |
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Capn Spanky
112 Posts |
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Capn Spanky
112 Posts |
Posted - 08/26/2008 : 12:15:31
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Deleted |
Edited by - Capn Spanky on 08/26/2008 12:26:12 |
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mizlorinj
USA
490 Posts |
Posted - 08/26/2008 : 14:26:57
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Love the John Stossel story. Barbara's comment at the end was funny--guess she's not convinced! |
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hkp
47 Posts |
Posted - 08/26/2008 : 15:06:53
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Hi Carole:
Interesting dilemma! I think I would add that you might think about whether there is something you NEED from your daughter that you are not getting - short of her belief.
If I remember correctly, was it Dr. Sopher who wrote that friends and relatives underminining TMS can undermine treatment and progress? You could talk to your daughter and explain that at a minimum you need her not to debunk TMS around you, and at a maximum to support you as you work the TMS angle, even if she does not believe.
In answer to your original Q, I think there was a post about Paula Abdul and TMS on here about a week back. :o)
hkp |
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winnieboo
USA
269 Posts |
Posted - 08/27/2008 : 11:30:09
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Hi Carole,
So funny your comment about the cult. One of my teenagers (not the one going off to college) somatizes and has anxiety and I've talked to him about TMS, mostly in relation to my neck pain, but I'm hoping it will strike a chord with him. He is completely non-receptive. I mentioned something about (my) writing on a blog and he said, 'great, my mom's on a blog with crazy people talking to other crazy people.' Really has a sense of humor, doesn't he?
They just want us to be their Mom. Doesn't matter what aches, pains, hopes, fears, etc.that we have, and I don't think it matters how old they are, either. Our role is just Mom (we're good for listening, advice, laundry, dinner, money, rides, whatever is age appropriate) and I think they have to be pretty evolved to go beyond on that. |
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