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joli
USA
51 Posts |
 Posted - 08/22/2008 : 18:25:09
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I read your posts about accepting reality and realizing that our thoughts our not our reality.
Ever since this back pain is controlling my life , I realize it made me more sad than ever was even when I had bad things happen.
I think the lack of control or ability to escape and manipulate my experiences is seating heavy with me.
I feel much more sensitive and having a hard time to find that small voice within telling me what to do next.
I am in awe that I can hurt so much without any meds or procedure that
will help, and that it just there, not hinting its going away for such a long time.
I am not a depressed person, but it is getting to me.
Sorry for the yucky feeling post, but I had to put it down on "paper"
I think therefore I am. |
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Paul
134 Posts |
Posted - 08/22/2008 : 19:08:14
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YOU control your back pain and life if you want. You said...
quote:
I think the lack of control or ability to escape and manipulate my experiences is seating heavy with me.
Control. The more you try and control your life, your pain, how you feel...the worse you will most likely feel. It is paradoxical. When you can not TRY and control, not TRY to manipulate, and simply switch your mind out of the fear mode, and into a doing mode...the better you will feel.
What are you afraid of doing with the pain? Have you ever said, "F%$! it, I'm going to do this anyway" and just do something?
The more you LOOK for the right path to follow, the more you will just suffer because you are just searching.
Your mind is making you sad.
Your wanting of complete control is making you sad and most likely your pain.
Sure it is not easy, I know. But once you break through a couple times and realize that maybe today is a bad day, but over a week ago you had several great days...ask yourself WHY?
Rumination does not get one anywhere.
Write down how bad you are feeling right now, but MOST importantly, stick it out, and when you do feel better again and are having good days...WRITE IT DOWN! Why? So you can look back on that time of feeling good AND feeling bad and see that it changes.
The more you convince yourself, the less you fear the pain, and the less you keep that mental circuitry going between your brain and pain...the sooner you will start to get better.
Hang in there! |
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winnieboo
USA
269 Posts |
Posted - 08/22/2008 : 21:56:08
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We have the ability to control ourselves, and our pain, but not the rest of the world.
And herein lies the conundrum for the TMS population, with our need for pefection and symmetry and resolution. The more control we attempt to dish up in our world, the more tension we create in our bodies.
I've noticed a big issue for me is that I try to EDIT everything. Not just my writing, but every situation and conversation--everything my kids are thinking or doing--everything my husband is saying or doing--everything that I just said or did.
And that's just so counter-intuitive and self destructive, really, b/c that's just not living in the moment or living in reality and it creates a boatload of tension, for me! If I edit everything then what "IS" ceases to be, because I'm always fussing with my and everyone else's reality.
It's really helped to notice this and to step back and just let people talk or just let conversations evolve, or just let situations unfold without my constant anxiety and interference. |
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Scottydog
United Kingdom
330 Posts |
Posted - 08/24/2008 : 00:59:21
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Joli,
remember that beating TMS is not a straight path. We have great days and miserable days. Light-bulb moments and times of despair. Just keep plodding on and you will get there in the end.
Anne |
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