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pinkmorocco
5 Posts |
 Posted - 08/21/2008 : 15:04:25
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I have silently been reading and getting inspiration from all of your stories, and certainly those that I can relate to. Thank you.
I am healthy, active 32 yr old. Up until 2 months ago i was practicing yoga 4-5 times a week, riding my bike and generally being as active as possible. All of this with sciatic pain. I figured that it would eventually go away, or I would 'stretch' it out at least.
18 months prior my lower back started aching, but with in no real particular spot and each time I practiced yoga, it subsided a little. After a workout session at the gym, I came home, stretched to one side and was bedridded for a week after it.
I have experienced LBP - with things feeling like they go 'out of place' for at least 10 years and usually, I lie down for a bit and it goes away. This time, the pain was excruciating.
My yoga teachers (who are also PT) came over to help, one leg was 1.5" shorter than the other and no matter what they did - nothing helped. I was in complete spasm for most of that week.
A day later - I was recommended to read Dr.Sarno, which I did immediately. It didn't resonate with me completely at the time, at least, it didn't really ease my pain.
I am a big believer in Mind/Body - I don't believe you can have one without the other. I had studied massage & hypnosis for many years and do my best to stay out of Dr.s offices or take any medication.
So, I was all open to it.
When this incident happened, it was claer to me that it was directly related to the stress that was going on in my life. I was having a lot of trouble with my US visa and was unable to go home for an indefinate period and to add more stress to that, I was in a long distance relationship with a man from my home country - so the pressure to want to get back was enormous.
As time went on, I consulted many different therapies, and all aided in my recovery, one way or another - but never completely.
I really belived that it would dissipate on it's own with yoga & my healthy lifestyle. But there was always a nagging pain in my sciatic area of my left leg.
At the end of the last year, I recieved my Green Card & I went home to Australia after many years. I was sure that my sciatic pain would go away...it didn't and proceeded to get worse.
This year it has been excruciating, and, while on a business trip, I found myself in the emergency room succumbing to pain killer & muscle relaxants..all of which really didn't help.
For the past 3 months, the only thing that helped has been Advil.
I finally had an X-ray & MRI. I have a slight twist in my hip - but i have known that for years and the Orthopeadic Dr. found a large herniated disk in my L5-S1 and a nerve impingemnt on S1 root nerve.
However - before hearing all of this, I had found this forum and re-read Sarno MBP and started journalling and tapping into some emotions that I didn't have.
I started to feel better. But, all of this was in conjunction with a few other things I did.
1/. My PT friend had suspected L5-S1 and had me do MacKenzie exercises for it - which helped.
2/. I also started to introduce more whole grains & organic oats and basically eat a diet which provides all my muscles with the right minerals and iron it needed. While I am in pain, it's my muscles that are also under stress.
3/. I substitued Advil for Organic Turmeric - a natural anti inflammatory as powerful as Moltrin.
In the same week I did all of the above as well as commit to 15mins of journalling every day.
I saw results - last week from not being able to walk straight, sit in one position longer than 5 mins, stand or move my hips with any flexibility - I was sleeping longer, I could turn over in bed without pain and I was able to clean my bath tub and ride my bike.
The pain went away but the tingling and pins & needles did not however.
Perhaps I pushed it this weekend but I thought I would just concentrate on the emotional side of my healing and journal every day.
And now - I am back in pain again. It's so debilitating because I was so convinced that it was TMS and now I am questioning. The only relief I get now is when I do a MacKenzie exercise.
I am still determined that it is TMS - - but should I be concerned when I have pins & needles that run all the way down my leg? Even if the pain subsides as I move around?
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mizlorinj
USA
490 Posts |
Posted - 08/22/2008 : 06:31:41
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You have the gray hair of your spine, which is what Dr. Sarno says herniated discs are. They are normal abnormalities and do not cause pain.
Pins and needles and numbness are usually signs of TMS. I had total numbness in one part of me that even if I pinched it I felt nothing. Very weird to experience. Since you have already been to the doc to be checked out, why not explore your emotions deeper? I'd spend the time writing about what's buried in there. Explore the fears, the hurts, the angers. If it comes to mind, write about it. Don't dismiss anything quickly--explore it.
Your exercises will help right now because you believe they will, but doing physical work is not helping reinforce the emotional aspect of your pain. Just saying "physical therapist" reinforces in your brain the word PHYSICAL.
Of course a healthy diet never hurts!
As a mind/body believer, I came to accept that my emotions caused this pain. I journaled. As I wrote, I did get deeper and deeper into what was going on, pains of the past, everyday stressors I could come to terms with. Pain gone. Not overnight, but it did go away as my brain absorbed the new way of thinking, and released pain of the past. It took awhile to be able to do most yoga moves, but I did get back to it.
Best wishes for healing,
Lori |
Edited by - mizlorinj on 08/22/2008 06:35:25 |
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pinkmorocco
5 Posts |
Posted - 08/22/2008 : 13:36:38
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Thanks Lori, for resonding; very kind of you. I suppose part of the reason that I have TMS is that I have a personality which likes everything fixed right away.
Perhaps this is my lesson. I don't know if I have the strength to completely give up on the physical - I mean, it helps to feel strong in my body - it helps my mind.
The pain is the most intense when I am standing and walking to be honest. Which is not fun, considering I am planning to go on trek through China at the end of October.
I am just journaling like mad - and it is definately helping, that I know. I feel like the tight hold my butt muscles have is a direct metaphor for the tight hold of emotions/feelings that I don't want to let go of. That is what, ironically, I am holding on to right now.
The tingling & shifting of pain does get really scary though.
Thanks again
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hkp
47 Posts |
Posted - 08/22/2008 : 13:54:19
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Hi Pink:
Even though it sounds like a fabulous experience you are looking forward to, I wonder if any fears about the trip or the PRESSURE to feel well for the trip (internal timeline) could be contributing to your flare up - although it sounds like there are other stressors as well.
I ask because my pain started in May before a June vacation that (while I was looking forward to) I had some definite fear about. And then I put all kinds of pressure on myself to be better before going - and it did not work. :O(
Just a thought. I hope you feel better soon!
hkp
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pinkmorocco
5 Posts |
Posted - 08/23/2008 : 11:33:42
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Thanks HKP,
I am sure that has a lot to do with it - since it is being organized by an ex lover of mine, whom I still have feelings for.
It's just so difficult staying patient and sane when everything I do is affected by this pain.
I went walking in the mountains yesterday, just to push through it and by the time I was finished, I was in agony. Just walking from the car to the restaurant was excruciating.
Has anyone had a pain killer i.e. cortizone etc. just to get the pain to subside a little while still working on the emotional release? I am just afraid that I am not going to be any better months down the track - I can give up the trip - I am ok with that.
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mizlorinj
USA
490 Posts |
Posted - 08/24/2008 : 17:02:31
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Yes, painkillers are ok while we work through the issues.
RE: cortizone, though, Dr. Sarno says nothing is inflamed so you don't need an anti-inflammatory.
On the other hand, I find that if you truly believe something is going to work for you, (anti-inflam), it will. So see what helps make the pain bearable for you.
He prescriped Vicodin for me and the first one worked wonders. #2 and 3 did NOTHING and I stopped taking it and did lots of journaling. Meanwhile, how about exploring feelings about this upcoming trip, spending time with your ex-lover, fears?
-Lori |
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Still confused
