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davidg
5 Posts |
 Posted - 12/14/2004 : 17:54:55
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For the past few years I have had bouts of lower back pain. Every once and a while my back would hurt - no big deal. I attributed it to stress and it would soon go away. But, several agonizing episodes over the past few months have nearly incapacitated me. I am a believer in Sarno and have read his books. I fit the TMS mold and am fighting for my underlying rage to surface and show itself, but I am stuck. It has been over a week of agony with no abatement.
Before this, I lifted weights 6 days a week and am in great physical shape. When I don't have back pain, I work my back muscles vigorously and I can do a million crunches. MY BACK IS STRONG!!! THERE IS ABSOLUTELY NO REASON FOR ME TO BE LAYING IN BED LIKE A FEEBLE OLD PERSON!
What really frustrates me about TMS is that the physical pain compounds the underlying rage and I am stuck in this vicious circle. Not only do I have the original problems that caused the TMS, but the TMS produces more anger and rage. I am consumed with the pain. Please, my fellow TMSers tell me what you do when hope is slipping. |
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holly
USA
243 Posts |
Posted - 12/14/2004 : 18:05:08
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KEEP HOPING!!!  |
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Baseball65
USA
734 Posts |
Posted - 12/14/2004 : 18:14:44
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Hi David G.
what do you do?
You come talk to us on the Forum!
I had a couple of recurrences after my intial recovery.I would get angry too.....it was like "COME ON..this is B.S....I know what's going on here,and I don't believe you"...and then I'd always just pick up the book again,start at page one and do "the work"...
Every time I was willing to start over again,the pain would be gone before I had reached the final page....each time it was shorter,and eventually the pain would be gone before chapter 2.
The one story that always bugged in "Healing Back Pain" was the story of the woman who's hip started hurting after she'd long been recovered,and just had a talk with herself and the pain went away immediately.
I can now avert new attacks that way,but generally once a new "guise" gets ahold of me,I have to do the book/hit the journal.
I would always include some of what you're already doing....contradict the symptom by doing exactly what the medical community would NOT have me do.If it was my shoulder,I'd drop and do pushups...if it was my knee...I'd run sprints...
You are already on to it....the hardest part is patience.You sound a lot like me...I have zero patience for it,but alas...it's our lot in life,and at least we know,unlike so many others,that it is only a passing thing.
So...what's going on in your life?
New job? Leaving one? The holidays? Family? Relationship? Kids?
You'll end up winning 'cuz you are already doing the right thing.
peace
Baseball65 |
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Dave
USA
1864 Posts |
Posted - 12/14/2004 : 18:33:09
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While TMS attacks are often random, sometimes they accompany stressful events that we are not fully appreciating. Maybe something has happened in your life recently that has affected you more deeply than you realize, that is, you are not experiencing those emotions (such as a problem at work, a fight with your wife, anxiety over the holidays).
The "underlying rage" you speak about is not the same as the unconscious rage that causes TMS. That outwardly expressed anger is just a TMS equivalent -- another distraction from the real emotions that you are not feeling.
All you can do in these cases is the work: write in a journal; think about the pressures of life that you'd rather not have to deal with; get angry at your boss or wife or whoever it is that is pissing you off (but do it while you are alone  ).
Above all just accept that TMS is by and large a random process and take a long-term view. Don't allow yourself to think that the pain might not be TMS after all. That's just what your brain is trying to get you to do. |
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davidg
5 Posts |
Posted - 12/15/2004 : 07:33:54
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I know exactly what triggered this last brutal attack. I got into an argument with my fiance and my mom just finished yelling at me about something else a few hours earlier. I went to bed that night at fell soundly asleep.
The next morning I did a great workout in the gym and was feeling all pumped up. When I got to my job that morning, I noticed my belly was protruding and then BOOM I was screaming in agony from back pain.
I took the next three days off work and laid in bed and read Sarno. The pain subsided a bit, but I now can only amble around like a zombie. It is torture getting up and down from chairs.
I bet that since I went to bed that night without dealing with my emotions, my brain decided to "help" me the next day by taking my mind off my troubles. It certainly worked. I spent little time thinking about my mom or fiance and was instead consumed with the pain.
Writing these paragraphs has been therapeutic for me. |
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Tunza
New Zealand
198 Posts |
Posted - 12/15/2004 : 13:05:59
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Hi David,
I have just posted a reply to UK James's post re pain in the knees and achilles. The same stuff I said to him I would offer to you as one suggestion for where to go from here.
In addition I think it's great that you are able to see the connection between what's happening in your life and your pain. I'm sure that you are going to get there eventually.
Interestingly for me the times I make most progress are when I stop worrying about when I will have this thing "beaten". I have begun to see this as maybe one of the most important lessons in my life and I feel less anger and frustration about it when I see it that way. I'm not a religious person but I guess I'm just trying to make sense of it all.
Kat |
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I am not feeble. I AM STRONG!!
