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 Herniation Taking Over My Life
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MRosenthal

USA
30 Posts

Posted - 11/30/2004 :  16:13:57  Show Profile  Reply with Quote
Dear all,
I am in bad shape. I posted an email in September explaining about a horrible nerve sensation that came and went every 2 minutes. That went away, but since then my back and legs have experienced mild burning and anxiety feel. Yesterday at work I stretched my forward at my desk at work very gently and all of a sudden I felt a horrible nerve sharp pain that immediately caused my muscles in my back to flare up and form a tightening pain. I could not bend or move my hips. The sensation was the same as when I had hurt my back 3 years ago at the gym on the sit and reach machine. Now I am in excruciating pain. I feel helpless because I am not allowed to use heat or take anti-inflammatories according to Dr. Sarno. I am not close to any TMS doctor and have read Dr. Sarno's books a couple times. I think psychologically all the time. I know I am under a lot of stress with my family and in my life in general. I just don't understand why this pain caused a stiffening and a horrible swelling. I have been diagnosed with a herniated disc and cannot seem to stop worrying about that. Many others at work have a disc problem and tell me I'm crazy for thinking my injury does not cause any pain. I also cannot get out of my mind that Dr. Sarno says in his book that herniated discs don't USUALLY cause pain. I wish he would have said NEVER. I am letting this ruin my life. 3 years now with on and off pain and I am only 26. I don't worry about lifting things or bending, but I get the pain when I do. Please help me. Any advice would help.

Thanks,
Matt

holly

USA
243 Posts

Posted - 11/30/2004 :  17:13:13  Show Profile  Reply with Quote
Matt, You are totally engrossed in your pain. TMS is in full swing ! I can tell you have NOT fully accepted that this is classic TMS. Your friends at work are not helping either.You are also focusing on that word "USUALLY". When you are "TOTALLY" aware(not partially)that it IS TMS that you are experiencing relief will start to come. A little heating pad is o.k. and soothing & I use it myself many times. It just helps relax me but I take it for what it is worth .
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Dave

USA
1864 Posts

Posted - 11/30/2004 :  17:26:00  Show Profile  Reply with Quote
Didn't have to read beyond the title of your message to see that you were still thinking physical.

Red flags from your message:

"I had hurt my back 3 years ago at the gym on the sit and reach machine."

You need to forget about that "injury" even if that's what it was (it is entirely possible it was acute TMS masquerading as an injury). Even if it was a real injury, it is fully healed by now.

"Many others at work have a disc problem and tell me I'm crazy for thinking my injury does not cause any pain."

The fact that you are discussing this with your co-workers and giving any credence to their opinion is evidence that your belief is not strong.

"I have been diagnosed with a herniated disc and cannot seem to stop worrying about that."

Again, proof that your belief is not strong.

"I think psychologically all the time."

I am willing to bet that there are plenty of repressed feelings that you are still avoiding, despite the fact that you convince yourself that you are thinking psychologically.

"I know I am under a lot of stress with my family and in my life in general."

But ... have you really, honestly explored how the child inside you feels about all that? Have you explored the RAGE that comes with that stress? Stress can be a TMS symptom itself.

"Please help me."

Only you can help yourself. You need to give yourself over to the diagnosis and really do the work. Most importantly you have to learn how to ignore the pain and accept that it is a benign symptom.

Your thoughts are still very deeply rooted in the physical. As long as that continues, you can think psychologically all you want, and it won't make a difference. I suggest you read Healing Back Pain again, and try Dr. Sopher's book if you want a change of pace. Even though you might tell yourself you believe it is TMS, deep down you are lying to yourself about that.
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jack

27 Posts

Posted - 11/30/2004 :  17:59:49  Show Profile  Reply with Quote
Dave:
I think I am where Matt is at this point in time regarding accepting the TMS. I have posted before and the dilemma that I have and I feel others have is how you discern whether pain is really physical or TMS. As I previously said I am a runner and I have pain now and I have continued to run and the pain is still there and worse than ever. DAve you said that this means that I haven't fully accepted the TMS diagnosis. This pain arose in late October. It has been one month that I have run with the pain and not stopped. I continued to run because I know that treatments won't work but I DO NOT KNOW IF REST WILL WORK. Is the chronicity issue important in a TMS dx. Having pain for one month and not stopping running - how does one know? That's where I'm at.

Dave, you said unless you do the work - think pyschologically, etc. nothing will happen. I guess my fear is that if i I continue to work more fear will overcome me - the pain won't go away, IT WILL BECOME CHRONIC, etc. Continuing to run causes stress and stopping running causes stress.

Does this make sense to anyone out there? I know that sometimes I ramble and cannot express myself succinctly.

Thanks everyone.
Jack
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plainchant

41 Posts

Posted - 11/30/2004 :  18:07:47  Show Profile  Reply with Quote
Take long hot baths when the pain is unbearable - it gets your blood flowing and usually helps people with their TMS symptoms.

Practice the Relaxation Response to get ahold of your mind.

http://www.ucop.edu/humres/eap/relaxationrespone.html

And get a pencil and several pieces of paper and write write write. Write down everything that you're going through and EVERYTHING that causes you tension, stress, and emotional turmoil in your past and present. Write until you're exhausted instead of sitting their thinking about you pain and getting more anxious.

And don't be afraid to acquire and consume more sources of TMS information (Dr. Sarno said that knowledge is the cure). There's a list of them on this site. I've read all three of Dr. Sarno's books, Dr. Sopher's e-book, and Dr. Brady's video tapes. And right now I feel fine.
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Dr. Fatteh

USA
16 Posts

Posted - 12/01/2004 :  02:32:47  Show Profile  Reply with Quote
Matt,

One must examine the language that you use to see the FEAR that you are exhibiting and the PRECONCEIVED NOTIONS OF PAIN that you have. First, you describe "nerve sharp pain." Frequently sensations of sharpness or burning are automatically attributed to so-called nerve pain, which is highly theoretical and usually inaccurate. Pain that is radiating, sharp, or associated with tingling does not automatically mean that it is neuropathic or "nerve pain" and these sensations are classic TMS symptoms as described by Dr. Sarno. So don't get hung up on the preconceived notions of "nerve pain" or "disc pain," because they will affect how you process the pain, and how you recover. Remember that there are studies that have found painless disk herniations on MRI as incidental findings.

Also, the act of associating this pain episode as being "...the same as when I had hurt my back 3 years ago..." exhibits a fear of injury that will only end up being a self-fulfilling prophecy. Re-iterate to yourself that this pain will surely be a short-term thing that will heal as the body was designed to do. And, get yourself the Fred Amir book to help you plot a course.

Parvez Fatteh, M.D.
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diverlarry

USA
44 Posts

Posted - 12/01/2004 :  07:18:44  Show Profile  Reply with Quote
I have had similar experiences. My last "injury" happened when i was stretching. The "snap " sound then the tightening pain. I was in bed for a week or so. I have also had weight lifting injuries. I think some people expect that if you think psychologically the pain will go away immediately. This didn't work for me. It was a long and slow process. Each day i did a little more and worked on Sarno's theory. It has been 8 months since then. Im not quite there yet. The last hurdle for me has been intense physcial exercise. Im still holding back. But i do more and more. Eventually this fear will go away. I just came back from a 2 week trip to the DR. Surfing, climbimg waterfalls,quad riding. 8 months ago i was in bed and could not move. What worked for me was gradually doing more and more. Sometimes i needed to back off. Everyone has their own schedule. I also read and re-read Dr Sarno's books.I also am seeing a TMS psychologist. He has talked to Dr Sarno before. He also works with athletes who have been injured and have fears of being injured again. After many months i now am beginning to understand why i have TMS. Its taken a long time for the theory to sink in and understand my repressed emotions.
I did not have a "breakthrough". It was a long, difficult,frustrating process. But it gave my life back to me.
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tennis tom

USA
4749 Posts

Posted - 12/01/2004 :  08:54:24  Show Profile  Reply with Quote
Dear Matt,

Sorry to hear about your intense pain. I can't cite the page, but I am sure I've read in Sarno's books that he prescribes pain killers when patients are in the accute or "excrutiating" level of TMS pain. Also, I don't think there is anything wrong with using ice, heat or anything else to temporarily get you through the pain and be able to "think" again. This would be, with the understanding, that this is just a temporary band-aid fix to a longer term "healing" that will be accomplished by "mind-life" changes.

The "fear" of "what to do?" to get rid of the pain flare up, is another distraction, keeping you from dealing head-on, with the "life-problems", underlying TMS psychogenic pain. Over a ten year period I have tried everything from A-Z to "cure" or soothe my pain. I have received temporary placebo benefits from most. They temporarily allowed me to escape the outside real world of tension and cocoon for a short period and escape the strssors.

My short-cut to getting to the core of the problem is going to page 26 of MBP and looking at Rahe-Holmes list of 43 life events that can create '"disease" through the mechanism of internal rage'.

I have reccommended this approach on several ocassions recently and have been somewhat surprised to recieve NO feedback. To me this one separates the men from the boys; the girls from the women. I perused the list myself before posting this and found at least ten life situtaions that fuel my TMS-pain creating internal rage.

I would reccommend curling up with MBP and reading it word for word until you can quote it by rote. All the answers are in the book. There is no need to get more books, that's also a TMS distraction. If you can't get relief from Sarno's books I doubt that another book will do the trick.

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Toronto

25 Posts

Posted - 12/01/2004 :  09:11:51  Show Profile  Reply with Quote
Great post Tennis Tom. You always provide us with lots of useful information.

Since you have been familiar with TMS for a long time, where do you stand with pain? Do you still have it and if yes, how often?

What was the most helpful in the battle with pain?
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tennis tom

USA
4749 Posts

Posted - 12/01/2004 :  14:53:45  Show Profile  Reply with Quote
Thanks for the kind words Toronto. I noticed recently that I am in the lead with most posts. This fact snuck up on me and, IMHO, is a dubious distinction. Maybe there is a correlation to number of posts (as well as length), to TMS "healing".

As far as, where I stand with pain, I stand very well thank you, and walk, swim, drive, sleep, sit and fleetingly, sprint. On a numeric scale I score myself at 95-99%. The only limitation on "normal" activity is running on the tennis court. Under competitive pressure my right hip locks up and it gets dragged along for the ride.

I hope someday to forget to look at this board because I am so distracted with other pursuits in a positive direction. I am already starting to stray to a Jeep board in contemplation of, the new freedom machine, I will purchase, in order to explore the good old USA. I plan on resting my hip, on long cross-country drives, between playing in Senior Tennis Tournaments, far and wide.

I overcame my fear of movement, several years ago, when I started walking 45 minutes a day in January. My limp would go away after about 20 minutes. These proved to me that I could walk normally and that it was probably TMS. The butt muscles were locked up due to a TMS bad habit but they would melt and break loose if gently and attentively used.

I am now putting my attention onto being able to run on the tennis court. I just visualize the court experience as a walk-about. Fortunately, I've got good enough stroke technique that I can get away with it against my practice partners in my coach's clinics. My coach has suggested that I not run hard after balls that are hit obviously out of my reach and just let them go. He even mentioned the word muscle "tension" yesterday and understands anatomicaly the holding or locking that occurs, due to the TMS struggle. He does not accept TMS on it's face but understands it intrinsicaly having been a touring pro athlete in tennis and soccer;(I gave him MBP years ago and I'm sure he has never read it).

I am hanging onto some of my pain because you can learn a lot from pain, (but it would not be my future first choice for transformation), and prefer the pain I know to the one I don't. As my hip improves, I am starting to see other TMS emotional equivalents, starting to stir up, such as depression, sleeplessness, overeating and anxiety. The gremlin seems always lurking with a ready excuse in hand for extending our suffering.

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Michele

249 Posts

Posted - 12/01/2004 :  15:00:29  Show Profile  Reply with Quote
Tennis Tom: That list is very revealing. The last time I looked at that list, I think I had about 15 of the TOP 20!!! Good grief! I'm a slow learner too, but I'm making steady progress. Yesterday I had a bad stomach ache and surprisingly, my hip didn't hurt! When I realized my hip didn't hurt, I had to laugh.

Dave: Great post!
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tennis tom

USA
4749 Posts

Posted - 12/01/2004 :  15:51:42  Show Profile  Reply with Quote
Sorry Toronto, in my longwindedness I didn't relpy to part of your question: what was most helpful with the battle with pain? Pain is not the opponent, the battle is for BELIEF. When you believe in TMS theory, the pain can vanish, as has occured to a lucky few, or in my experience, it may slowly go away.

Pain can be temporarily amelioratd with the A to Z list of treatments including: meds, snake-oils, new-age therapies, alcohol, massages, TV evangelists, voo-doo, balms, patches, soakings, ad infinitum as long as your wallet can bare. They will all have some circulatory, soothing or placebo effect. The proof is in the pudding, DOES THE PAIN GO AWAY FOREVER? If it comes back the aforementioned modalities didn't do the job.

I also had, what I term a TMS eppiphany, within the past year or so. I got a pain in my neck for a week for no physical reason and my butt pain subsided. I posted in more detail about this and maybe you could do a search if you cared to.

The most helpful thing to me was studying Sarno's books as if I was cramming for a college final and trying to ace it--word for word, rote memorization--If you can't do it in practice, you can't do it under pressure--How you do something, is how you do everything.
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