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koukla
70 Posts |
 Posted - 11/27/2007 : 12:30:24
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Hi everyone,
I am new to the forum. I suffer from an RSI in both my hands and arms and have had it for a little over a year. I have read the Mindbody Perscription and I do see similarities in myself in terms of the personality types he described. Psychosomatic illnesses and anxiety run in my family and I do definitely think it is possible. I am struggling with the possiblility that I may have TMS.
I have good days and bad days but I haven't been able to find any correlation between my activities and pain. Some people say that when they do something pleasurable they do not have pain but I have pain even when I do fun things like drawing (I love art). I seem to get the most pain a few hours after I do an activity and I am very afraid to do anything at all because I don't want to cause myself more problems. But even when I don't have pain per se, I always feel like something isn't right in my arms and I can't seem to get my mind away from the subject of my hands.
The biggest reason why I haven't pursued the treatment for TMS, (journaling, etc) is because I am afraid to use my hands to write. I feel like there is a lot of stuff I could dig up about my past but I am afraid to actually pick up a pen. Do you think I should buy voice recognition software to do the journaling or would that get in the way of my recovery?
Also, how have you dealt with unsympathetic family members? My husband is convinced that this is all in my mind and that I am somehow making up everything, even the pain. He is paying for chiropractic treatment but he does so begrudgingly and always tells me to "be a stronger person." When I told him about the TMS theory he said that sounded like me but he did not want me to even get the books or the mindbody workbook or anything to help me out because he thinks that if I read more books I will become a hypochondriac. He wants me to ignore the pain and just get a job and start doing everything like normal. I don't think this is possible because right now I could not handle working even at a part time job.
Has anyone else had any of these same problems and how have you dealt with them?
Thanks for your input,
Carolyn |
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mizlorinj
USA
490 Posts |
Posted - 11/27/2007 : 14:13:20
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Carolyn, sorry to hear about your pain.
Unsupportive husband as you mention makes me angry just reading about. But keep in mind, some people, many in fact, will not grasp that your brain has control over your body. And even when you are healed, they still won't "get it" (speaking from experience here).
Aside from anger, fear is a big TMS attacker--fear that something is really wrong (have you checked out at doc?), fear of people thinking it's in your head, fear you won't get better. No judgements; we cannot help that we feel these things but we can journal/talk about them and release the feelings. Relief.
BTW, I heard the phrase "it's not all in your head but it starts there" somewhere (amazon book review?). How true.
TMS pain is very real.
I feel it takes a courageous and strong person to want to examine their emotions, past and present, and face various situations and traumas. You have taken a step in the right direction by giving TMS diagnosis a chance. . .
I know some people don't understand or respect the method of healing I used but I don't care. I just say, "it worked for me and I'm very happy about that" [so kiss off!!!]
In answer to your question, yes, get something to be able to speak your feelings into. It's getting them OUT that matters.
My best suggestion is get started getting your feelings out by whatever means possible.
-Lori |
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salamander
85 Posts |
Posted - 11/27/2007 : 14:17:42
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Carolyn,
The whole premise behind Sarno's teachings is what is going on in your head, and not physically with the body. The tone of your post is focused on your physical problems. The pain is real, but there is nothing physically wrong with your arms. Re-read Sarno several times. Really listen to the message that he is trying to get across to you.
Lastly, Sarno would tell you that you must ultimately stop the chiropractic and other treatments as this will be a barrier to your recovery. Pain at various times is all a part of the "conditioning", which is telltale with this syndrome. Your husband is ironically correct when he says that is is "all in your head". Unfortunately, what he does not undertand is that the pain is very real. There is a process that is going on that is causing real physical discomfort; it originates in the brain, and it also ends there. It is also completely harmless.
Ultimately, you MUST PUSH forward. You must get angry at yourself (brain) for causing this discomfort. The best thing that you can do is to steadily, progressively, increasively, do more and more things until the pain is a distant memory. Fear is a HUGE component of this "syndrome". Start small and work your way up to recover. It takes courage, but you will triumph.
Re-read the book, and do not dwell on your symptoms.
Best of luck in your recovery,
Doug |
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koukla
70 Posts |
Posted - 11/27/2007 : 14:49:03
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I do know that issues with my husband are a lot of the reasons why I am angry. This whole thing started after I got a job--my first "office job" after I graduated from college. I was doing fine at my other job and I got a promotion and was feeling really happy, but he really pressured me into getting a "real job." I was very stressed about doing well at the job and I felt way in over my head. Thinking back on it, I don't think I ever would have taken up that job if I didn't allow myself to be pressured into it. It really wasn't something I was terribly interested in or felt passionate about.
I think that the main reason why I focus on the physical is that I am very afraid of causing permanent damage if I overexert or do not get the right treatment right away. If you read any literature on RSIs, there is a big emphasis on recovery being a "race against time" and that if you develop a chronic case, your chances of recovery are slim to none. Somehow, I don't think that is right because I do think the body is designed to heal itself and I am not doing anything very strenuous or abusive to my arms. I do notice that I feel worse when I am emotionally upset so that reinforces the idea that it is emotional in nature. |
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armchairlinguist
USA
1397 Posts |
Posted - 11/27/2007 : 17:18:03
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The RSI literature is full of crap. Full recovery is possible at any point and it is not likely you will hurt yourself trying. I do recommend going gradually though.
And you won't become a hypochondriac reading Sarno's books. Your husband must not have any idea what they contain if he thinks that! And in that case you should surely find out for yourself what they contain. More likely they will give you hope and confidence.
quote:
I seem to get the most pain a few hours after I do an activity
This is a very strong sign that you have TMS. Real injuries just don't behave like this. You should check out the Success Stories forum and look for HilaryN's success story; I think she had this pattern as well.
For journaling, I wouldn't bother buying VR software, but try doing it using a little tape recorder or something if you are afraid of writing at first. Later you will feel better and can do it by writing. (If you do want VR software though, I'll just mail you my old stuff, as I don't use it anymore after recovering totally from RSI last year. :-))
--
It's not 100% belief that's required, but 100% commitment. |
Edited by - armchairlinguist on 11/27/2007 17:18:33 |
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painintheneck
USA
124 Posts |
Posted - 11/27/2007 : 18:34:35
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Carolyn,
Pay close attention to your symptoms and your state of mind and what's going on for the next while would you? You might notice patterns, I know I did. Specific pain patterns depending on the stress or the fears going on at the time. I can go from pain free to unable to do much because of stiffness and pain and back to next ot nothing a bit later. This is all without any activity to cause pain and really does relate to what's going on in my life and how I feel.
Example; If I have an arguement with family memeber pain worsens, if I am stressed about something I am afraid to do or resent having to do the pain is worse. Just look and see. This is why journaling might help you. and IMHO for the time being if you need to record it then do it till you feel better and resume normal activities. |
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Scottydog
United Kingdom
330 Posts |
Posted - 11/27/2007 : 18:50:14
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quote:
My husband is convinced that this is all in my mind and that I am somehow making up everything, even the pain. He is paying for chiropractic treatment but he does so begrudgingly and always tells me to "be a stronger person."
Aaaaargghh! Being a 'stronger' person is what got me into my TMS mess in the first place. Being 'strong' (ie not displaying real human emotions, acting tough and able instead)is the last thing you want to do as it means you are repressing all your true feelings and keeping them squashed inside you.
Remember you cannot change anyone else - so don't waste time trying to convince your husband of things - you can only change yourself. But, you never know if you heal yourself it might change his views.
My husband teases me about the time I spend on 'hypochondriac.com', well, I'm interested in health issues. It's hardly worse than the time he wastes on modelengine.com. Each to their own!
Anne |
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koukla
70 Posts |
Posted - 11/28/2007 : 06:57:23
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I know that stuffing my emotions is a bad thing and even though I haven't worked through everything in my past, I try to deal with new problems as they occur. I used to keep a journal but stopped just before graduating from college. Now that I look back on it, I can see that my stress levels have gone up since I stopped journaling back then.
I am a little squeamish about starting a journal again because I am nervous about my husband finding it and getting his feelings hurt. I do love him very much but a lot of my issues have to do with our relationship. If I keep something locked up, I know he would suspect and start to get curious. I also don't want to censor myself because then what's the point?
I do have the feeling that I should progress with this tms thing in secret. If I go around telling my family about it, they would always be asking me about my progress and that might create too much pressure on myself to do it to quickly. Even now, it seems like every time I talk to my parents/relatives they ask me "how are your hands?" I know they mean well, but it makes me feel bad when I have to say "Oh, nothing's changed."
Carolyn |
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mizlorinj
USA
490 Posts |
Posted - 11/28/2007 : 10:33:29
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Carolyn, there is no rule that says you have to keep what you've written. If I write something at work, I don't keep it. I shred it almost immediately.
This exact issue came up at one of Dr. Sarno's meetings--how to keep it private. The person went with using a voice recorder and then deleted.
-Lori |
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armchairlinguist
USA
1397 Posts |
Posted - 11/28/2007 : 10:59:00
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I also kept a journal for a while and had more problems when I had stopped, but the kind of journal you keep also matters.
When journaling for TMS it's important to focus on how you felt about something (rather than what happened or what the other person might have felt), and how you might have felt unconsciously. I think it is also helpful to keep in mind while journaling that the goal is to relieve the pressure of having these feelings inside you, and that the feelings are completely normal and okay to have, that they don't mean you're a bad person, just a human person. I found it really helpful to list current pressures (stresses/worries/obligations/possible repressed feelings), one on a line, briefly, and go back to previous situations that I knew were tough for me and make a list of pressures in those situations too. That helped to clear out the backlog. Then I would go back and explore in detail certain of the pressures that I felt deserved more attention.
As Lori says you don't have to keep this stuff, but actually I found it really helpful to at least keep the list so I could look at it when I was thinking about things, so you might look into online services where you can journal privately, or just keep things for a few days and then get rid of them.
Also, if you haven't checked out http://conquerrsi.com/ and http://podolsky.everybody.org/rsi/ , I highly recommend. Everyone with RSI-TMS should read those pages. Very inspiring and very well explained.
I definitely recommend keeping your TMS work on the downlow if you are worried that other people knowing will put pressure on you. (BTW, the fact that you think this would happen for you is a sign you are a TMS personality.  ) I didn't really tell anyone to start with, and once I stopped having arm pain it was great to be able to say "Actually, since you ask, they're doing great!"
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It's not 100% belief that's required, but 100% commitment. |
Edited by - armchairlinguist on 11/28/2007 10:59:45 |
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DrGUID
United Kingdom
44 Posts |
Posted - 11/30/2007 : 06:44:03
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quote:
haven't been able to find any correlation between my activities and pain
Hmm, I think you have answered your own question there! I was always baffled why my symptoms came and went at random.
I had similar problems to you - search for my success story somewhere on this board. In April I could type for 10 minutes a day before getting a lot of pain, by August I was doing 9 hour days without a lunchbreak. A while before I found Dr Sarno's books I was coming to the conclusions that my problems were psychological rather than physical. I fit his personality types perfectly, and score very highly in the TMS test that's somewhere on the web. It did take quite a bit of reading of the books to make any headway though, and it was The Divided Mind that helped me the most.
I still get a bit of pain when using a computer (if you use your muscles you can expect them to ache a bit!), but now I find it's usually gone by the time I get home from work, and I no longer have symptoms lingering over the weekend.
My cure only really happened when I stopped thinking about RSI and got on with my normal life. I no longer go to the doctor, use a normal keyboard and mouse and haven't bothered with any posture/occupational health aids/chiropractors etc.
I didn't try journalling, but I am more aware of what my body is trying to tell me (usually to slow down a bit!!!).
Incidentally, you can reassure your husband because since reading Sarno's books I've gone from being a hypochondriac to a sort of anti-hypochondriac. If I get any health symptoms now I just ignore them and they go away.
Good luck! |
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How did you know it was TMS?
