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Nor
152 Posts |
 Posted - 06/10/2007 : 21:03:22
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Hi All,
I am an occasional poster/reader, usually letting weeks or months pass before visiting. When I was a newbie to TMS and early in the healing process, I relied heavily on this forum for information and support. If I was new now, I'd probably exit and dismiss this forum as just another group of nuts online.
Recently, every time I log on, I am bombarded by some long-winded debate which usually has nothing to do w/TMS. It is frequently initiated by someone who is offended by another member's opinion or the way it has been stated. That member then defends him/herself and others will join in the rally in support of one of the members. Its such a time waster!
May I suggest, if you are insulted by someone on this forum, ignore their future posts. Simple. This is the only area of your life where it is that easy. We are not friends or enemies. We are total strangers who wish to help and be helped. Let's keep it simple. I hate to think of newbies getting scared off and missing the great benefits of this valuable forum that are disguised by all the virtual arguing.
Just my 2 cents.
Nor |
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flyingann
United Kingdom
2 Posts |
Posted - 06/11/2007 : 03:02:35
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As a newbie I see where you are coming from.I did seem to have to read through a lot of dross to get to the valid stuff.I do think it important though people feel free to air their opinions but perhaps a few folk need to concern themselves more about getting better so they can get on with their lives and not need to use the site long term as a crutch to their general problems in life.
Anyway maybe i'm totally off the mark.Very sorry if i've offended anybody. |
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basil
52 Posts |
Posted - 06/11/2007 : 03:28:47
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I totally agree Nor. I made the mistake of reading some of these threads when I first came here 6 days ago but now I know which ones to avoid. All the forums I have used of the past always seem to have the same culprits regardless of the topic.
Thankfully after posting my story I have had nothing but support and recommendations so I will just continue to ignore those threads :) |
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shawnsmith
Czech Republic
2048 Posts |
Posted - 06/11/2007 : 06:38:00
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You have to realize Nor that many TMSers are very angry and highly sensitive people. This is part of the reason they have TMS in the first place. That anger and sensitivity is played out on this board. A lot of times the anger is displaced but they cannot see it, but it does fulfill the role of emotional repression. When you see what these posts really are you will not get angry, but will in face smile. It is important to be patient as people deal with their suffering and inner turmoil, some of which becomes manifest on this board in the form of angry postings which you may find offensive.
*******
Sarno-ize it!
Read chapter 4 of Dr. Sarno's "The Divided Mind." It's all you need to know in order to recover. |
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Nor
152 Posts |
Posted - 06/11/2007 : 20:21:50
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I hear you Shawn Smith, and I considered the sensitivity thing. Believe me, "sensitive" is definately a word people use to describe me, too. Yet, I am rarely offended by anything someone says to me on a post b/c its not personal. Oddly, I am able to compartmentalize that. I do realize that some others are not.
Two thoughts though: First, it has become a bit excessive in the past several months - a perspective that being an occasional visitor has granted me. Second, I'm not sure that letting your rage out on total strangers online over politics and semantics is really therapeutic.
Again, I'd hate to see newbies not give this forum a chance. Many of the more, ahem, "opinionated" members whose statements begin 10 page threads actually have great things to offer if folks could stop being offended by their words long enough to actually hear them.
2 more cents. Thanks for the responses.
Nor |
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electraglideman
USA
162 Posts |
Posted - 06/12/2007 : 11:19:31
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[quote]Originally posted by shawnsmith
You have to realize Nor that many TMSers are very angry and highly sensitive people. This is part of the reason they have TMS in the first place. That anger and sensitivity is played out on this board. A lot of times the anger is displaced but they cannot see it, but it does fulfill the role of emotional repression. When you see what these posts really are you will not get angry, but will in face smile. It is important to be patient as people deal with their suffering and inner turmoil, some of which becomes manifest on this board in the form of angry postings which you may find offensive.
*******
Shawn, you have a very good way of simplifing a complex subject.
I agree 100%.
How many times during the day or week does someone say something to us that we disagree with or just makes our blood boil and we say nothing? We repress it, which ='s pain.
Maybe there should be a "WARNING" on this forum for newbies not to take anything personal. It's just opinions or statements made by TMS patients who are trying their best to rid themselves of this GOD awful pain. THATS ALL IT IS.
There are no bullies here. Never have been. I didn't know TT. He was very blunt and argumentative when he was trying to prove his point but I would bet my last dollar he wasn't that way off the forum. This was probably the only place he could come and say what he wanted to say without hurting the feelings of a friend or family member.
I like everyone here no matter what race, color, sex, religion, or political persuasion. Any statement you make about me or on any subject will not be taken peronally by me. I know it's part of your healing process.
I would like to say in advance if I say something that hurts your feelings its nothing personal. I'm just stating my opinion. THAT'S ALL I'M DOING. Stating my true feelings is something that I have SUPRESSED most of my life.
And another thing. This place is almost completely void of any kind of humor. Lighten up.  |
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An observation
