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kevin t
USA
72 Posts |
 Posted - 01/07/2007 : 01:53:08
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Hi people,
Been a while since I posted here. Thought I would drop by and check in.
Lately Ive been swimming everyday about and hour or two a night. Initially I did this with the intention in mind that it would "help" my pain. I stopped that line of thinking. Now I just do it because it makes me feel better overall, it helps me sleep better, I stay in shape, and as a side bonus my pain subsides nothing. Oh yes, and theres some hot women there.
Ive been feeling pretty good. Theres almost no pain to speak of, but if I start to think about it or obsess on it, I can notice "some". I must say thought that all day there is this background pain. Its barely noticeable, but its there. Its MAYBE a 1 on the scale to 10.
I think that Ive relied on swimming to help the muscle tension, but haven't gone the full route. I haven't been doing any REAL TMS work. I simply became too lazy, and I know it. I really know that I have to to make this residual pain go. The fact that I swim every day like a madman and still have residual pain tells me a lot. It HAS TO BE something linked to emotions. I mean, how can I swim 40 laps a day in an olympic sized pool, feel no pain or restriction during, but yet have this small pins and needles type thing all day.
I really dont obsess anymore on all the crap or "what if this and what if that". I know that me just merely ignoring it helps. Like when I first started exercising. I used to think that I just HAAAAD to get in the hot tub before working out or else I would be "prone" to some kind of massive injury. Its total BS. Now I dont even warm up before I swim, and it make no damn difference in pain. The things that we convince ourselves.
Its weird to think that just a few months ago, I was in such horrific pain all over my body that I could barely focus on anything. I seriously felt like I was hit by a truck. But the fact that I really didn't do much of the "TMS Work", and still improved daily is weird. I struggled at first, but I just got to this point of not obsessing. I also threw myself into many projects , and that in itself was a great distraction. Better than pain any day though.
Also, when I first came to this forum, I was really obsessed with the whole TMS notion. Now, I just don't think about it that much. Maybe some people do better by just not talking everyday about "Well today this is whats going on" or "Well my new problem this hour is...."
I think that when I did that, I really gave the TMS all the power.
Heres a weird thought. What if the study or research of TMS is just another distraction in itself?? Hmmmmmmmmmmmmmm
Regardless, I know that I'm prone to severe pain again. So I do have to stop being lazy on the process. Swimming everyday isn't going to get to the real issue, but its a good bridge to the next step.
And as I sit here, about to make a closing remark, I am slowly turning my attention to my pain regions. Very Very Very Very Very telling.
Its all one big scam by the brain. I'm not fooled anymore. You shouldn't be either.
Kev |
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kevin t
USA
72 Posts |
Posted - 01/07/2007 : 02:00:41
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| I forgot to mention. Im off all meds including the stupid anti depressants. I no longer get the weird "ZAPS" falling asleep at night from anxiety. So, um, yeah, Im doing better. lol |
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vrampen78
USA
30 Posts |
Posted - 01/08/2007 : 22:56:38
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Kevin,
Congratulations on your improvement and on being able to enjoy swimming just for the sake of having fun & general health. It's so difficult ignore the pain (even though it's just background pain) or to stop focusing on the physical...I'm definitely still working on that. Journaling is really a BIG plus in this whole TMS thing...ppl don't really think journaling helps with anything because it's just writing, but it makes a HUGE difference. Keep up the good work.
-Veronica |
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just reporting the latest
