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Suz
559 Posts |
 Posted - 09/26/2004 : 15:23:12
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Hey all,
I am so upset - yesterday afternoon, after talking to my TMS therapist - a couple of hours later my right hip started to feel a little sore - lo and behold, by 9 pm last night, I was in agony - barely able to lift my right leg. I have always got the sciatica pain in the left. I have shared recently how my pain is shifting all over the place - strange pains in my upper back throughout the night. But this sciatic pain is the worst. I guess it must have something to do with my talk with the therapist.
I was talking to her about how I feel like a failure. She asked me my idea of failure - I told her that I received an amazing education in England and always got the best grades and feel that I never lived up to my potential. I did not expect at the age of 34 to be a divorcee in a career that is not satisfying and am not using my brain enough etc. etc. We discussed how angry I am towards my mother for the high expectations that have contributed to my perfectionism - I should have a fabulous husband now, 3 beautiful children, loads of money and an amazing career! In my family, if you don't you are a failure.
Anywa1 - phew! I actually left there feeling emotionally better but why did the pain come?
It has been around all day and has not changed.
Very very frustrated
Sorry I vented so much!
Suz |
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menvert
Australia
133 Posts |
Posted - 09/27/2004 : 00:17:18
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As unpleasant as it may be it sounds like you are actually making good progress .
Shifting to another leg you HAVE TO realise it is TMS.
The unconscious mind is not necessarily logical, although it felt like you had some good emotional release doesn't mean that your unconscious mind appreciated it...
Maybe you are very close to digging up a very big pool of rage but not quite there and your unconscious mind is thus very scared right now...
Its attack seems to be working fairly well :)
If I'm not able to refrain from thinking about a new pain/bout of pain I usually try to engage in a very distracting activity Until my pain is low enough I can longer obsess over the fact that I'm getting pain. Preferably doing an activity which I'm not 'supposed to do' such as typing despite my RSI symptoms.
OR (when I read this I disturbed myself) , if for example, my leg is hurting too much . I will sit down and do an triggering activity so the pain goes to my arms, because I can deal with that pain better..... that whole concept disturbs me greatly but that works for me... it's not dealing with it fully but it can help. its manipulating TMS for my own benefit.
Most people should probably disregard that last paragraph lol |
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Furious - sciatic pain is back with a vengeance
