| Author |
 Topic  |
|
Penny
USA
364 Posts |
|
|
armchairlinguist
USA
1397 Posts |
 Posted - 09/26/2006 : 12:50:57
|
Great graphic. So true.
--
Wherever you go, there you are. |
 |
|
|
JaneLeslie
USA
88 Posts |
Posted - 09/27/2006 : 07:40:33
|
Hi everyone!
Thanks Penny for sharing those thoughts on your kids and your issues---that rings a bell with me. It really helped. My own neediness drives everything sometimes. Need and fear. Hard for me to separate my kids from me. Especially when I am emotional and "down."
My mother told me yesterday that I had very bad colic as a child. Even back then the pediatrician said it was "nervous system discharge." My bother and sister did not have colic and they don't have fibro or TMS.
Maybe I will start a new thread about colic. Did most of us have it? I agree that we cannot buy into a "pathological nervous system", but perhaps we are wired a little bit sensitively. I have always loved music, for instance, and could feel it in my nervous system. It would be great for some real research to be done on what we TMS'ers have in common.
My biofeedback guy told me that my EEG showed excessive activity over the right frontal lobe. He was slightly blown away. He said that is "the emotional part" of our brains. Make sense? I will give the biofeedback a try, but I am not going to let those charts and grafts intimidate me. Some days I just wish I could be tranquilized all day while I get through this process. Just go to La-La land.  It is draining between pain and tears. The funny thing is that I was pain-free for about a month, got the diagnosis of TMS and BOOM the pain is back and I am at square one. Go figure.
Thanks for everything everybody. You are in my prayers and please pray for me! I know I am not crazy but just feel like it sometimes.
Jane
p.s. I just got Brady's tapes. I will watch them today. THIS IS A FULL TIME JOB! |
|
|
|
Scottydog
United Kingdom
330 Posts |
Posted - 09/27/2006 : 09:46:23
|
Penny,
I read Creating Health; How to wake up the bodies intelligence by Deepak Chopra just after reading MBP and it helped to enforce the mindbody belief though it might seem a bit dated now.
I read another of his books but couldn't relate to it as well, he is very spiritual. Your Erroneous Zones by Wayne Dwyer was good for dealing with negative thinking.
I've just bought another copy of Louise Hay's You Can Heal Your Life, must have given my other copy away, it can seem flowery but I know the first time I read it it did improve my outlook and attitude - i've moved to a new place so need to keep a positive frame of mind to meet folk and form friendships.
Anne |
|
|
|
armchairlinguist
USA
1397 Posts |
Posted - 09/27/2006 : 10:16:56
|
One thing in regards to sensitive nervous systems...I think they do exist. How they come to be pathological (TMS, etc) is another matter. But studies with meditation have shown that regular meditation can rewire brain activity patterns. So there is at least one approach that can actually change the brain's patterns. Maybe there are more. That's a hopeful fact.
--
Wherever you go, there you are. |
|
|
|
JaneLeslie
USA
88 Posts |
Posted - 09/27/2006 : 11:55:22
|
I think you are right Art. We have sensitive nervous systems that are (hopefully) open to modification vis-a-vis relaxation.
There was a guy years ago (head of a prestigious pain clinic in Boston) who told me that my nervous system was "damaged." He told me that I would be stuck with this problem (basically) but I could get relief from acupuncture. Suffice to say acupuncture was a costly venture that didn't solve the problem, but did (at times) provide temporary relief.
At this point I know my nervous system is maybe too responsive but that is a heck of a lot better than being damaged!
I am curious ARt how extensive your TMS was. Are you completely healed? How sick were you? I think we sensitive types don't need abuse and trauma to activate TMS but perhaps trauma makes it more complicated(?) I don't know. It actually makes me feel better to know that there are folks out there who had pretty "normal" childhoods (whatever that is.) It means, perhaps, I might have been sick no matter what. I get tired of focusing on childhood issues. It can drag you down if you let it. I get tired of focusing on ME ME ME all the time!
Thanks!
Jane |
|
|
|
Gecco
9 Posts |
Posted - 09/27/2006 : 14:05:25
|
| Personality type is a huge driver in TMS. I don't know if I buy the "perfectionist" and "people pleaser" groupings but for people that are deeply upset about life issues, family relationships, and other "core issues" I am a complete believer. The hardest part is wrestling thorugh all the things that are bothering you, to find the one or two key drivers. Once they are found triggering a release is equally challenging. I do believe people are predisposed to TMS, yet it takes environmental triggers and childhood experience to let it fully express itself. |
|
|
|
Scottydog
United Kingdom
330 Posts |
Posted - 09/28/2006 : 16:04:05
|
I've been working on TMS for a year and a half now. The more I read on mind-body stuff the more I see it around me in all walks of life and all personalities.
I think we flatter ourselves by claiming we are extra sensitive, more caring goodists - and a perfectionist I am definitely not though I still had 30 years of TMS symptoms.
We would be out there saving aids orphans in Africa not sitting in comfort obsessing about our health problems if we really cared about others' happiness so much. A miserable selfish s-o-b coud still get TMS when their partner gambles all their savings away!
If you think you are somehow more sensitive and more delicate than everyone else you will naturally expect to find it much harder to cure your fragile body of it's symptoms.
IMO anybody can get tms symptoms and anybody should be able to cure it! |
|
|
|
Littlebird
USA
391 Posts |
Posted - 09/29/2006 : 02:22:15
|
Kether, that's a great tip you got from your therapist. I'll remember to tell myself that. Thanks for passing it on.
Scottydog, I didn't mean to imply that only people who are goodists and perfectionists get TMS. I agree with you that anyone can have circumstances that will cause anger that leads to TMS. And I think you're absolutely right that anyone should be able to cure themself of TMS, regardless of whether they view themself as more sensitive to their surroundings or not.
I don't think that most of the people who believe they are more sensitive or more reactive to their surroundings than average would consider themselves to be delicate or fragile. Having a heightened sense of awareness of things like noises, tastes, textures, and other people's feelings is not a defect, it doesn't indicate any structural or functional problem, and it doesn't mean the person is limited in any way or in need of special treatment. It's just part of a continuum of physical experience, and just as there may be people who are more sensitive than average to their surroundings, there are undoubtedly people who are less so. It's just a range of experience, with some people falling more towards the middle of the range and some falling more towards the ends. At least that's what I've read and that's what fits my own experience.
Corey |
|
|
|
JaneLeslie
USA
88 Posts |
Posted - 09/29/2006 : 10:59:51
|
Littlebird,
I wonder if this is where the first seeds of this "illness" are planted. The kid who feels the need to morph into someone else in order to placate the parent (first) and then everyone else (2nd.) To some extent we all have to be civilized and get along with each other and "people please." But maybe we over-cultivated this and it led down the wrong road. I feel that part of my problem---reading people---is sometimes a strength, but it has been more problematic than helpful over the years. It makes you wonder, at the heart "Who am I?" If you feel like someone who can change personalities to suit others than who are you indeed?! How to get rid of it! It is almost a pathology of too much empathy.
Jane |
|
|
|
Scottydog
United Kingdom
330 Posts |
Posted - 09/29/2006 : 13:21:07
|
Hi Corey,
"Having a heightened sense of awareness of things like noises, tastes, textures, and other people's feelings is not a defect" - Must admit I haven't read anything that suggests that certain people have heightened awareness for tastes etc. I did read that children brought up in stressful environment due to eg violent or alcoholic parent are super sensitive to certain behaviours of other people because they developed the ability to know instantly when parent was in the said state so they could avoid aggravating the situation.
I just feel that if your brain can bamboozle you for decades into believing you have a chronic debilitating life altering illness it can easily convince you you are over sensitive, affected by loud noises, more easily upset than average to certain social situations etc etc.
anne |
|
|
|
armchairlinguist
USA
1397 Posts |
Posted - 09/29/2006 : 17:34:07
|
Something else on the subject of being sensitive: the author of the Trigger Point Therapy Workbook, Clair Davies, reports that he was sensitive to noise and especially to people eating in front of him, if I recall correctly, for most of his life. He wrote that once he learned to relax, the sensitivity went away. I would not be surprised if our brains ginned up being extra sensitive as a distraction from being under emotional stress, even at a young age (after all, there are many reports of young kids getting stomachaches and headaches when they are upset about school or home life). This kind of sensitivity would give a stressed child something "legitimate" and thus safe to be upset about.
But some of it may be normal variation. Some people have a better sense of smell than others, I'm pretty sure. I know I smell a lot of things that others don't, both pleasant and unpleasant, and I also have rather good hearing and can hear people from across a large room.
--
Wherever you go, there you are. |
Edited by - armchairlinguist on 09/29/2006 17:35:29 |
|
|
|
floorten
United Kingdom
120 Posts |
Posted - 09/30/2006 : 06:50:39
|
quote:
Originally posted by Scottydog
Hi Corey,
"Having a heightened sense of awareness of things like noises, tastes, textures, and other people's feelings is not a defect" - Must admit I haven't read anything that suggests that certain people have heightened awareness for tastes etc.
A popular book on this topic is "The Highly Sensitive Person" by Elaine Aron, a psychotherapist who has noticed this variation in her patients.
I've read the book and it makes a lot of sense. After all, you get natural variation in peoples height, built, physical agility, etc. Why wouldn't you get natural variation in the nervous system.
As a highly sensitive person myself, I also have no doubt this is a genuine phenomenon. Right from a very young age I was much more sensitive to extremes of temperature than my peers. Getting into a swimming pool which all the other kids found warm felt like a bath of ice to me. I would be gasping for air while the other kids would be splashing around enjoying it! I wasn't afraid of water - I liked *warm* water! But this felt cold to me (and still does!)
Of course, if you're not this hyper-sensitive yourself, then it looks from the outside that the sensitive person is just a being a big sissy! We certainly get a lot of flak for this over the years.
But why not consider the obvious - that such a person genuinely is having a stronger reaction to the stimuli than the others? If it looks like a duck and quacks like a duck...
"What the Thinker thinks, the Prover proves."
Robert Anton Wilson |
|
|
|
Wavy Soul
USA
779 Posts |
Posted - 10/01/2006 : 06:04:11
|
Re the Highly Sensitive Person thingy...
Yes, I believe in it. According to her book, if I remember rightly, about 15% of the population of not only human beings but other mammals are 3 (?) times more sensitive than the other 85%. I think she speculated or some scientist speculated that this is an evolutionary adaptation - these types keep an eye on things at a deeper level for the tribe while others go out and hunt.
I also know that believing in this at first helped my TMS and then made it worse. I think it helped it because it took away the incredible feeling of shame I was having for being weirdly sick - there have always been people around me who don't believe me because I don't have a "real" disease, like cancer or polio. So when I read the HSP material I got off my own back and stopped attacking myself. But this was a short-term relief because I wasn't at that time really awake to TMS despite doing lots of psychological work.
I'm going to start another thread about being shamed for odd illnesses.
Thanks again - I feel moved by this forum.
Love is the answer, whatever the question |
|
|
|
JaneLeslie
USA
88 Posts |
Posted - 10/01/2006 : 15:45:09
|
People have given me a lot from this forum! I do not like being a highly sensitive person because I think it has made me ill and at times anxious/depressed. I hate it but I have to find out what the advantages are. I love music and sing well, so there is one I guess. Also I used to work in the social work field and had more empathy and understanding of clients than a lot of other professionals. Sometimes I just feel like these things I have are useful for others but not for me! What do I care if other people find me empathic. I end up feeling trapped by it!
I am now trying to go on this TMS journey (I hvae fibro) and wish I could go into a special TMS hospital for a month. This is hard stuff to do! I am getting in touch iwth heavy feelings of loss and feelings of being out-of-control. The pain is still there but shifting a lot. Yikes!
Jane |
|
|
|
Wavy Soul
USA
779 Posts |
Posted - 10/01/2006 : 21:28:02
|
Hang in there Jane. I have found that it goes through waves but gets better overall, all the time.
xx
Love is the answer, whatever the question |
|
|
|
tennis tom
USA
4749 Posts |
Posted - 10/01/2006 : 22:02:21
|
Nothing wrong with being sensitive. If someone for instance says something that hurts your feelings, just do the TMS work. Stop, look and listen. Before getting all hurt and bothered, consider the source. Think was there a shred of truth in the situation. If so appreciate the opportunity for self-improvement and be on your merry way better for it. If they are totally off-base, call them an A-hole either to their face or silently depending on how big they are.
Most times we feel insulted, the insulter gives little thought to what they are saying because they are insensitive and it's no big deal to them and they don't lose any sleep over it--only you do.
It's part of the TMS work, give it some thought, work it out accept it or discard it and move on. |
|
|
|
JaneLeslie
USA
88 Posts |
Posted - 10/03/2006 : 11:49:20
|
You are right Tom. I immediately get my hackles up. It happens so quickly---fight or flight. I wish my mind would SLOW down and not react so much. I know this is a process.
Thanks,
Jane |
|
|
|
JaneLeslie
USA
88 Posts |
Posted - 10/03/2006 : 18:47:01
|
One last point (maybe ) on the nervous system. Today I had my first successful biofeedback "lesson." It felt really nice because I taught my nervous system to calm down a bit. I had to do this through self-talk---I was not able to just look at the graph and "make" the bar go down, I had to talk my way through it.
The way I did it was through telling myself: "I have a normal brain and body." Maybe we don't hear that enough from ourselves, or if we do hear it do we believe it? The specter of pathology is always looming isn't it? That is the adversary. That is TMS. I have a way to go but I feel more confident that eventually I'll do it.
Thanks to all for this very cool forum.
Jane |
|
|
|
Topic |
|
Chicken or Egg (Emotion vs. Nervous system)
