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jessiwho
Canada
2 Posts |
 Posted - 03/28/2006 : 18:50:27
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| Hi Everyone! I'm not sure if anyone elses spouse have written in but i'm hoping someone can help. You see my wonderful husband has TMS and he's actually been doing really well and eliminating the pain through reading and this forum as well as counselling etc.. Here is where i need help... I feel helpless. I want to be there for him and understand. I've just read one of Sarno's books and had my husband give me this website so i could read similar experiences that my husband is going through. I just feel like i don't know what i'm suppose to do. I will admit that it has put a small strain on our marriage but i'm not discouraged that we can work through it. I guess i would just like to know from others (who are going through what my husband is) what do you need from your spouses/loved ones. Any input would be GREATLY appreciate. Thanks. |
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Special One
USA
61 Posts |
Posted - 03/28/2006 : 19:19:50
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You are doing the best thing that a spouse can do,in my opinion, by reading about tms. If you encouraging your husband on this path, he will benefit. My husband didn't "buy into" tms when I first began using the method for healing about 5 months ago. It was hard to try to be strong when your closest loved one is not behind you. I stuck to it though, and he is actually coming to semi-accept the theory because I have improved and I tell him about it. It feels so much better to hear positive comments than sarcasm! I'd say let him talk with you as much as he needs to, through all the phases he goes through and try to believe in the tms theory 100% yourself. Remind him of Sarno's words if he gets discouraged and ask him how he's doing with his efforts. I'm wondering how his interest in tms work is causing a strain in your marriage?
Congratulations on your interest in your husbands recovery!
Marian (Special One) |
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jessiwho
Canada
2 Posts |
Posted - 03/28/2006 : 20:42:29
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Thank you for your reply. I think i may be the cause of the "strain" because of feeling distant to his situation but still wanting to help. Like i said before i truly believe it's not something that we can't work through. It is sometimes hard for a loved one to always understand when the other sometimes doesn't understand it themsleves.
I am glad to here your husband is starting to come around.
Thanks again |
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ralphyde
USA
307 Posts |
Posted - 03/30/2006 : 11:24:06
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I'd rather have your problem than mine. Mine is that my wife totally rejects the TMS diagnosis, when it is so obvious to me. She won't even talk about it or even see a TMS doctor, and has rejected me as well because of this. So she continues in her pain and disability, and even looks for surgery.
It is great that you support your husband during this crisis, and can give him the encouragement he needs. Helping him overcome his doubts and fears, and encouraging normal activity seem to me the important things you can do for him.
Ralph |
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Scottydog
United Kingdom
330 Posts |
Posted - 03/31/2006 : 13:30:45
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I'd like to add a comment here.
I've been working on Sarno stuff for a year and am making great progress but, particularly over the last 6 months, have had some monster rows with my other half.
Probably me working through stuff but also things that have annoyed me over the years and that, as we both keep our emotions under a tight rein, I've suppressed my feelings about.
We've been together for 25 years - a long time to bottle things up -
well they're not bottled up now so be warned!
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wife wants to help
