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jellybean
USA
7 Posts |
 Posted - 03/27/2006 : 20:07:28
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hi,
I was reading some of the other posts and noticed every now and then someone would say that this or that was the "key" to finally getting well. Maybe some of you who have recovered or are vastly improved could comment on what the "key" was for you personally. I realize that everyone is different but hearing others' experiences is very helpful. |
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ssjs
USA
147 Posts |
Posted - 03/28/2006 : 06:26:24
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1) Knowing there is nothing structurally wrong with my back
2) Knowing I really did have anger in me (through psychotherapy with a great therapist)
3) and having a quick chat with myself (c'mon now, back, don't give me that...gee I am upset...)I only have to know I am mad and upset. I do not have to know about what exactly.
and that is it. As I have said, and only for everyone to see it is possible, pain free for almost 20 years.
I do not obsess on what else I can find to help me...(meditation, religion, medication, exercise, the newest self help book, journaling etc.etc.) Just taking Dr. Sarno at his word and knowing myself through good therapy.
The only thing I have against journaling FOR ME, is that I fear that if you have mistaken thinking, the mistakes can grow without proper guidance.)
Sandy |
Edited by - ssjs on 03/28/2006 06:29:19 |
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jellybean
USA
7 Posts |
Posted - 03/28/2006 : 07:10:25
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thanks for responding. I do have a tendancy to over analyze things so your advice to just stick to the theory and stop looking for all these "extras" is helpful. Sometimes I wonder though if you have severe TMS (which I believe I do as I have ALL of the possible equivalents(except skin problems)), that I may need "extras", but maybe that is my problem, trying too hard to do too much! Aynone out there with fibromyalgia that found being real simplistic with method to be the way to go?
Thanks,Jellybean |
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ssjs
USA
147 Posts |
Posted - 03/28/2006 : 08:10:08
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Another very important point...
People who are doing well do not usually write on these message boards. They have no need to.
Even I only read the posts when I am under some kind of stress. It is my TMS equivlent!
So my point is that even if there are millions of people who are cured, they are probably too busy with their lives to read or write on this board.
Sandy |
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n/a
560 Posts |
Posted - 03/28/2006 : 10:10:18
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I agree. When I feel better I almost forget about this board:) I suspect many are like me in that respect.
On another note, I just finished a paper for a university course I am taking. The first in 12 years! As usual, I had the paper done well before deadline. It is not even due for two weeks.
As those who have followed my posts, I was spazzed out about taking the course in the first place and could my body handle it. Well I onl have three more classes to go and the final and I have done it. Resume all normal activity, says the good doctor. Best advice ever.
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savedbysarno
10 Posts |
Posted - 03/28/2006 : 16:29:51
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It has been about 10 years for me. I agree with ssjs. 100% belief in what sarno says. people never believe me and always try to find other ways. like it is harder to admit you have problems then to be in pain. like somehow it is easy to be in pain, and we all know that just isn't true. But i also have been without pain without any of the extras of self help books and all of that other stuff.
Did you see what channel seven in NYC said? how placebo accupuncture was better then placebo pills. proof that people will clutch at anything.
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Baseball65
USA
734 Posts |
Posted - 03/28/2006 : 17:18:26
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quote:
Originally posted by ssjs
Another very important point...
People who are doing well do not usually write on these message boards. They have no need to.
Even I only read the posts when I am under some kind of stress. It is my TMS equivlent!
So my point is that even if there are millions of people who are cured, they are probably too busy with their lives to read or write on this board.
Sandy
dittoxonemillion
One of the first things I told a friend who was 'doing the work' of recovering was to stop hanging out on the forum too much....It will raise every possible doubt you have,as people come here to have their doubts addressed.
I suppose if we have no other support network,it is important to know that there are others struggling with our same symptoms...
But..identification is just a small necessary component of a fair amount of hard Inside work.
I'm glad the forum wasn't around when I was recovering...I would have been thrown off for posting a question every 5 minutes
-bb65 |
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ssjs
USA
147 Posts |
Posted - 03/28/2006 : 17:58:39
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Baseball,
Just as you've said about the forum, "It will raise every possible doubt you have,as people come here to have their doubts addressed."
I would have gotten pains that never would have occurred to me.
My dad had back pain, and a wife who treated him pretty badly whom he loved far too much...
Back pain came very easy to me. It was already in my head. Aside from that I am glad my head was pretty empty when I found out about Dr. Sarno.
This forum would not have been good for me!
Of course that was before the internet! Amazing!
Yet sometimes...I need to read some of the posts.
Sandy
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jellybean
USA
7 Posts |
Posted - 03/28/2006 : 19:25:13
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well, thanks for all the advise. I am feeling that I should stay off the board for awhile to not raise my doubts any further. My goal right now is to empty myself as much as possible of all the previous programming of what was wrong with me. I really do think I am making it harder than it has to be.
Jellybean |
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Nor
152 Posts |
Posted - 03/28/2006 : 19:40:47
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Jellybean,
I was told I might have fibro-blankety-blank (I don't call it by name now because I believe it is TMS! I just say the "F-word". Childish, maybe...but, whatever works!) Anyway, like you, I experienc(ed) "equivalents" that travel in a seemingly random fashion. I started w/Sarno last fall and I have definately been doing better. It wasn't overnight but when I look back, I see clear progress. Just keep at it and stay focused. Don't entertain doubts. Good luck. - Nor |
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Jim1999
USA
210 Posts |
Posted - 03/28/2006 : 22:49:13
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Jellybean,
Sure, take some time off from the board if you need to. If you want to talk to someone about fibromyalgia when you come back, I'd be glad to talk. I made a full recovery from it in 5-6 weeks and have been recovered for close to 7 years. I think that getting rid of the "extras", as you've called them, was an important part of my recovery.
Jim |
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Kristin
98 Posts |
Posted - 03/28/2006 : 23:23:28
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Plain and simple for me is letting go of fear. It's good to learn to recognize the different manifestations that fear takes in our lives. We hold on, we cry, we yell, we supress, we hurt ourselves and others and then we feel bad about it or bury those bad feelings.
Of course there is the flip side where we are afraid because we have been hurt. Those buried feelings have the same effect. but like some have said upthread, just to recognize those fears as a cause, is often enough to set them free.
Fibro was also the first diagnosis I ever had that seemed to fit tms like symptoms, although migranes and tension headaches came up during my adolescence. I have always been open to the idea of my mind playing a part in certain disorders although the fear of physical causes or dread diseases lingered until I was introduced to Dr Sarnos' work.
Best of luck to you! Reading posts on this site has helped me so much especially when veterans share their wisdom. |
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Indy
Canada
45 Posts |
Posted - 03/29/2006 : 06:04:05
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"People who are doing well do not usually write on these message boards. They have no need to." Good point. This formum is a cyberspace support group. My experience with support groups is that sometimes it can perpetuate and support the problem instead of helping move forward. I know people who have been going to support groups for years. I believe they have grown an emotional attachment to the idea of the group. This forum is no different.
Having said that, don't be too quick to formulate opinions of the people contributing to this forum. Yes, I am still working on my "stuff" and probably always will. But I am very interested in contributing my knowledge and experience if it can help someone, and I suspect that there are many people who contribute here who are very excited and proud of themselves for the healing work they have done and just want to share it to help others. I've been very interested in mindbody medicine for years, and I'm here to not only share but also learn from techniques, ideas, experiences so that I can help my clients in my holistic health practice. It's always a challenge for me to help them see that most of their physical symptoms are due to emotional suppression and denial.
Healing from childhood trauma is a solo journey. Realistically, nobody owes you to listen, and nobody wants to hear the gory details. All your "keys" lie within you because only you know what is best for you. Take others' advice and decide whether it resonates with you. If it doesn't, leave it alone. My "keys" are: Having a skilled psychotherapist who gave me tools to grow from my emotional "mud and the mire" experiences. Second, journaling with my undominant hand to get to the heart of my unconscious emotional pain. Third, believing in Dr. Sarno's theories because he is dead on.
If you're not sure whether this forum is having a negative or positive influence on your progress, ask yourself "How has this helped me move ahead?" or "What am I learning here that is helping me?" or something like that.
Thank you all for your contributions to this forum, and know that every step that you take, even though it seems backwards sometimes, is a step toward freedom and vitality.
Blessings
Indy
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jellybean
USA
7 Posts |
Posted - 03/29/2006 : 11:57:10
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Nor, Jim, Kristin, and Indy,
Thank you so much, I found all of your posts encouraging. I think I will continue to check in with the board to share my progress and to ask questions every now and then. I just will do my best not to become too attached to it, as this is such and personal healing journey and no one can do it but me. It has actually been a bit of a relief to take the pressure off of having to look "outside "somewhere to get the healing. There have been enough dead ends in that direction to keep me focused on myself and my emotions. I just got Sarno's new book and am excited to really dig into it.
Indy, I am curious to know why you journal with your non-dominant hand. I think I heard this once before but forgot the reasoning for it.
Thanks,
Jellybean |
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Nor
152 Posts |
Posted - 03/29/2006 : 18:59:15
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Jellybean,
I wanted to add one last thought regarding the forum. I've also found that it can be counter-productive at times. However, don't underestimate your ability to filter out the stuff that's "bad" for you. After a while, you become quite intuitive about what posts to read and which ones to skip after only a few lines. Just remember, there's no rule about balance. You're allowed to only read the posts which make you feel positive! Enjoy Sarno's book. -Nor |
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Pendoreille
USA
23 Posts |
Posted - 03/29/2006 : 19:05:32
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I read Sarno for the first time less than a month ago, as I just couldn't see why a relatively healthy 50 year old woman couldn't heal, and I kept getting more and more things. I'm new to this forum, as I just started with my therapist (TMS trained) two weeks ago and she recommended it. I told her that I didn't want to go there, as I spent so much time in the last year on various websites/forums looking for the cure for my ailments. I think the internet is a bad thing when it comes to healing and health (I've managed to get the worst of every ailment or so it seems--Herninated disk, achilles tendonitis and gastritis--as one thing leads to another--more fear and anxiety, especially as you read about them on the web.), but she convinced me that it would be helpful to check out of a few of the posters. And she was right, it has been helpful to read some of postings, and I've made a collection that I've put in my journaling (though I'm going to use my therapist more) notebook. I'm now trying to wean myself away, as it does get addictive. And I think it does have to be my personal battle against the demons of my childhood, etc, and hopefully my therapist can help me sort it all out.
I try not to have doubt, but the fear of activity is powerful. I was very active, and it's been so hard to give it all up. Still, I want to believe that I'll be back there and I'm taking some small steps, but my biggest doubt is that am I just wanting this be the answer, as there isn't much else out there for me in the way of hope at this point. Still, I'm on every page. I have go with that and the fact that Dr. Sopher told me it was doubtful that I was a freak of a nature that could never heal.
So thanks to all of you who do stick around to tell your stories and I hope to do the same.
(and some days have been better since I started the reading and writing and the pain just moves around so much, which makes it all some so logical) |
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Jena
USA
195 Posts |
Posted - 03/29/2006 : 19:11:46
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| who is dr. sopher? he told u u cannot heal? is he a tms doctor? |
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Pendoreille
USA
23 Posts |
Posted - 03/29/2006 : 19:39:42
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Dr. Sopher is the TMS doctor in NH. I wrote it too quickly. Dr Sopher was trying to convince me that I wasn't a freak of nature that could never heal. He thought I should heal and that I was very much a TMS person. Now I just have to have make my unconscious believe that, too!
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Jena
USA
195 Posts |
Posted - 03/29/2006 : 19:58:24
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| aha! ok i gotcha! thanks for the fast reply =) |
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ssjs
USA
147 Posts |
Posted - 03/29/2006 : 20:06:42
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whether you read these posts or not, and I do sometimes, you all can heal! I did and many have! My only point was that there are even more countless people who have healed but never come to these boards.
I have met many many people who are pain free, I feel so good and healthy, and it is all because of Dr. Sarno.
Just believe that you are OK!
Sandy |
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Indy
Canada
45 Posts |
Posted - 03/29/2006 : 21:03:29
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Jellybean
I've been journaling with my left (undominant) hand for several years after my psychotherapist showed me the technique. I didn't realize that there were any books written about it until a friend gave me
"The Power of the Other Hand - A Course in Channeling the Inner Wisdom of the Right Brain" by Lucia Capacchione.
Basically, if you're right-handed, using the right hand accesses the left side of the brain which is your rational/logical/conscious mind. The undominant left hand accesses the right brain which is the intuitive, creative, inner child, "all knowing" brain. I have gained many insights about myself and my life through this journaling technique.
I usually start out writing with my right hand about whatever is on my mind, and whenever I hear myself ask a question, I write the question down, then answer it with the left hand. I basically start a written dialogue between my conscious and my "all knowing" subconscious. Most times I dialogue with my inner child, or anyone of my "subpersonalities" - the Skeptic, the Shadow Self, the In Denial Self, the Angry Self, etc.
This journaling is relevant to TMS. Sometimes I dialog with an area of my body that is in pain and let the body part speak with the left hand to tell me what it needs, or what I need to do to help it. This is one of the reasons I came across Dr. Sarno's work - my body part told me that it was holding rage there, but I didn't know how to get rid of the pain. And if you think that I'm really getting cooky, I would have said the same thing a few years ago if someone explained this to me. But this technique has really helped me heal from my earlier experiences that I mentally blocked out because the energy of rage was in my body.
I must say that this technique doesn't work for everyone, but I think that it would be worth a try if you're searching for answers for yourself. Don't worry about not being able to write legibly; it still works even if it looks like chicken scratches. Hope this helps.
Indy
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what was the "key"
