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Sean
34 Posts |
 Posted - 01/31/2006 : 11:32:05
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I have been devoted to the idea that I have TMS for over 2 months now and I think I am worse then when I started. I would really like to know how many other people are in the same boat, because I see a lot of similar post of people that are not getting better either.
I find myself having many of the personality traits, I have one or two of the TMS Equivalents mentioned, my "degenerative" disc don't appear that bad on my MRI (I've had doctors agree) to cause the amount of pain I'm in, I seemed to be conditioned to have pain in certain scenarios, etc., etc. But I CAN NOT SHAKE THIS.
I have examined my entire life forwards and backward, and while I see many things (if not all) that could be a contributing factor I have found no relief. I know that I may never pin point any one thing since these feelings may be repressed, but according to the book one does not have to find the item but mearly be aware of the anger it causes.
Most of my pain occurs when I'm standing or sitting (conditioned response) so I try to tell myself that it is my brain causing the pain and ignore it, but the pain usually worsens to the point were I must lie down.
I don't even know what I am looking for with this post. If anyone has been in the same situation (and is cured) that can provide some encouragement I'd appreciate it.
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savedbysarno
10 Posts |
Posted - 01/31/2006 : 11:54:36
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I promise you that if you believe it, it will work. It has been 10 pain free years for me, after being on the floor for 3 weeks at a time in severe pain with numbness and lack of movement in one foot. I suffered with this for years, and had chiropractors tell me I would be in trouble if I stopped going, and neurologists saying I would need all kinds of injections and operations, or I would have permanent damage.
It all got better after I believed and I am fine now, along with running a business, and finally graduating from college.
I run, I lift weights, I lift children,I stand all day at my work.
I am fine.
It can be done. |
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salamander
85 Posts |
Posted - 01/31/2006 : 12:08:01
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Sean,
Unfortunately there is no quick fix, or anything that I can really tell you other than to read and re-read Sarno's book and immerse yourself in what he says. I know from my own experiance, that I used to obsess over the degenerative disks in my back and always imagined the very worst. At some point you MUST let go of the idea that you are "injured" or that there is something wrong with you're back. I truly believe in what Sarno says, particularly that "denerative" disks are normal and that most everbody has "degenerative" disks after the age of 20. I also firmly believe that they cause no pain. Now, you must take that leap of faith.
I was helped by a person who posted a nice description of how he got better, but now I can't find it. The gist of this message was that he got mad at himself (his mind) for giving him this pain. He resolved to "go down fighting" regardless of the pain and resolved to not limit himself in any activity. I do recall him saying: "they will have to take me out on a stretcher" before I will stop. He also imagined his back as being constructed of Terminator like steel roller bearings that have a life expectancy of 1000 years.
If you are to take the "leap of faith", you must believe that you're back is normal. You must also believe that, despite the pain, you are NOT injuring yourself since TMS is a benign process. The "I will not become a victim" to TMS (fighting spirit) is what helped me to overcome the disorder.
Regards,
Doug |
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Scottydog
United Kingdom
330 Posts |
Posted - 01/31/2006 : 13:25:57
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"I have examined my entire life forwards and backward"
No, you need to examine yourself forwards and backward. Your emotions, your loves, hates, fears.
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electraglideman
USA
162 Posts |
Posted - 01/31/2006 : 13:26:15
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Sean,
Don't give up. Ill bet the majority who finally get relief from the pain got worse before they got better. It takes longer for some people. I'm one of them. I have reduced about 95% of my pain by practicing Dr. Sarno's techniques and I've been at it for about a year and a half.
When I do have pain (like right now while I type this) I'm usually sitting or standing in one spot for a while. I was at the gym last night and worked out hard using every muscle in my body with absolutely no pain.
Now if there was something wrong with me physically wouldn't it hurt while I was working out? Of couse it would.
I'm jealous of those who can just read the book and they're pain free for life.
Sean we're not one of the lucky few.
Hang in there!
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HilaryN
United Kingdom
879 Posts |
Posted - 01/31/2006 : 13:40:28
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I’d love to give you the answer, but I don’t know what it is. It was a couple of months at least before I started to notice a difference (I’m pain-free, now). I think you’ve reached the hardest part – the part where it doesn’t seem to be working, and all the doubts are setting in. I think a lot of people go through that as you’ve seen from the posts. Whether it’s the majority or not I couldn’t say, because the ones who get better quickly are less likely to post. One only usually posts to ask a question if one has problems.
Anyway, you’ve done well to stick at it so far. I’d say, keep at it. As soon as you notice the slightest difference (actually, getting worse is a difference, even if it’s not the one you want!), focus on that and use it to boost your confidence that it’s working.
Have you thought of seeing a psychotherapist? I thought I should see one when I was at your stage – but didn’t know where to find one, so I tried an alternative way of tackling emotions (“The Journey” by Brandon Bays) and that seemed to do the trick for me.
Hilary N |
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h2oskier25
USA
395 Posts |
Posted - 01/31/2006 : 13:52:41
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Sean,
I don't think you'll pay any attention to this, but from where I sit, you seem to focus on the physical A LOT. Not so much this post, but the previous posts are filled with focus on physical pain and physical symptoms and doctors etc. . .
Your unconscious is having its way with you keeping you focused on it.
Focus on getting on with your life since you know in your heart there is nothing physically wrong with you.
Beth |
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drziggles
USA
292 Posts |
Posted - 01/31/2006 : 14:09:31
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One thing that can be helpful is to see the same information in a different format. For example, if you've read the Sarno books, try Fred Amir's book, or try Schechter's TMS workbook. If you've only read one of Sarno's books, get another, or a video. You'll see that sometimes it takes a different angle to make something "click" in your unconscious and all of a sudden you see things in a new way. Another consideration is psychotherapy--a pretty good number of the patients whom I see end up needing additional help besides just reading the books on their own.
It can be very frustrating, but it's worth it. |
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HilaryN
United Kingdom
879 Posts |
Posted - 01/31/2006 : 14:11:53
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Beth,
Are you sure you're not confusing Sean with Seth?
Hilary N |
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h2oskier25
USA
395 Posts |
Posted - 01/31/2006 : 15:19:51
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OOPS,
Sorry about that Sean.
My most humble apologies.
Guess I have to look at the WHOLE name, and not the first two letters.
Ok, well I think I've said enuf . . .
Beth |
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HilaryN
United Kingdom
879 Posts |
Posted - 01/31/2006 : 15:58:49
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I asked because I nearly did the same when Sean first posted - sorry Sean (and Seth!)
I keep getting myself confused with Hilary no. 1 as well (greetings, Hilary!) I even try and sign on as Hilary and wonder why it won't accept my password.
Hilary N |
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Michele
249 Posts |
Posted - 01/31/2006 : 16:19:10
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Yes, you will get better. It takes time.
I ran 8 marathons from May 2000 to October 2003 and in February 2004 I started to get some pain. By June, I could barely walk. Found Sarno in August 2004 and in November 2005, ran a half marathon.
Yes, it can be done. Do I have pain? Yes, every now and then, sometimes in the same place, sometimes in others. But I'm not giving up and TMS is not going to rule my life.
Please stick with it!! |
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Stryder
686 Posts |
Posted - 01/31/2006 : 17:51:30
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Hi Sean,
2 months. You've put yourself on some sort of time table for recovery it seems to me. That doesn't work unfortunately. 2 months does seem like an eternity to you, as it did for me when I was in your shoes.
Yes, you may have consciously examined your life backwards, forwards, upside down, whatever. Your pain is being caused by emotions that you are unaware of. The anger and rage is repressed, so its impossible to logically think it out.
There are lots of things you can try now, many good suggestions below, and many more contained in the forum here. Try starting at the end and work your way forward.
Never give up. Never surrender.
Take care, -Stryder |
Edited by - Stryder on 01/31/2006 17:51:56 |
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Sean
34 Posts |
Posted - 02/01/2006 : 07:27:18
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Thank you all for your words of encouragement. I do appreciate it. I will continue with it. I'm just starting my 6th reading of HBP, and will look at the other books suggested.
I think that it is a credit to you all who are "cured" and still visit this site regularly to help others. |
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liz
USA
2 Posts |
Posted - 02/01/2006 : 07:33:01
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quote:
Originally posted by Sean
I have been devoted to the idea that I have TMS for over 2 months now and I think I am worse then when I started. I would really like to know how many other people are in the same boat, because I see a lot of similar post of people that are not getting better either.
I find myself having many of the personality traits, I have one or two of the TMS Equivalents mentioned, my "degenerative" disc don't appear that bad on my MRI (I've had doctors agree) to cause the amount of pain I'm in, I seemed to be conditioned to have pain in certain scenarios, etc., etc. But I CAN NOT SHAKE THIS.
I have examined my entire life forwards and backward, and while I see many things (if not all) that could be a contributing factor I have found no relief. I know that I may never pin point any one thing since these feelings may be repressed, but according to the book one does not have to find the item but mearly be aware of the anger it causes.
Most of my pain occurs when I'm standing or sitting (conditioned response) so I try to tell myself that it is my brain causing the pain and ignore it, but the pain usually worsens to the point were I must lie down.
I don't even know what I am looking for with this post. If anyone has been in the same situation (and is cured) that can provide some encouragement I'd appreciate it.
liz |
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liz
USA
2 Posts |
Posted - 02/01/2006 : 07:49:08
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This sounds a lot like me. 11 years ago i went through the same thing. i read sarno's book and even had an appointment with him, which i cancelled because i was too afraid i couldn't make the trip to nyc to see him and the pain was so bad. i live 12 miles from nyc.
i got the cortisone shots which moved the pain from my butt to my knee, and i slowly started to exercise. i don't know what i believed then, but after a while i ruled out the disc and spine problems as nonsense. the problem with me is that i don't always think i can get better emotionally. i stayed ok for 10 and a half years last week i had a lot of tension at work and usually i get good and pissed off when i am good and pissed off. for some reason by back blew instead. i went to 3 doctors and the e.r. in one week. my spouse said, hey i thought you always said this stuff was emotional. i pulled out my sarno book, my dr. shecter tape and had an emergency meeting with my therapist. i said i want my anger to come back to where it belongs. amazing how i don't think about being mad or hurt or ashamed or fear losing my job when my back hurt. i forced my self to think about those things, and made a list of all of those things. i am about 90% better. i suggest you do make a list of things that make you angry or ashamed or terrified. these are very strong feelings, and no body gets through life without them. maybe you can look up the list of doctors that treat tms and go there. it looks like almost every state has one. i had a friend who fell out of a window and broke his back. i talked to him about my pain and he said his back never seemed to hurt as much as mine. i know the pain is real because your feelings are real. no body likes these feelings; not even women :). if you could have a good cry, that might get the ball rolling in the emotional department. rent a 10 hankie movie if you have to.
let me know how you make out. you have to take action. the first action is make a list of those things that really could make you so mad, or terrified. write down your deepest fears and worries. WRITE is the key. don't just THINK. WRITE it down, and don't show anybody unless you want to. ACTION ACTION. WRITE back.
liz |
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FlyByNight
Canada
209 Posts |
Posted - 02/01/2006 : 09:09:18
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buy Monte book at www.runningpain.com
its definitly the most practical on the subject.
P. |
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Stryder
686 Posts |
Posted - 02/01/2006 : 17:52:10
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Good advice liz. I'm tagging the reply by liz here on 02/01/2006 : 07:49:08 as a...
SuccessStory:
-Stryder |
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joemccarthy
USA
18 Posts |
Posted - 03/22/2006 : 14:46:33
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Sean, what's going on? Don't give up. Screw the pain!! Get mad and the get even by causing your pain to disappear! It's up to you. It takes as long as it takes; don't give up. Get in the car and SCREAM at your unconscious to STOP THE PAIN NOW!
joemccarthy |
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Dave
USA
1864 Posts |
Posted - 03/22/2006 : 15:02:37
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Two months is nothing. It took your entire life to develop the TMS habit.
If you get frustrated and try to track your progress it is counterproductive.
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Ready to give up.
