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chicago
85 Posts |
 Posted - 09/24/2005 : 12:20:34
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My dad who has diabetic neuropathy (nerve damage) in both feet tells me that his pain is constant, sometimes more or less intense but always there. He developed neuropathy from surgery that removed most of his pancreas due to cancer. (going on 7yr survial thank God)
I have had pain in both my feet for nine years now. (burning) I have had dx of neuropathy and a dx of get out of my office you don't have neuropathy. I used to be on all kinnds of drugs but nothing now because they didn't make a differnce. After reading Sarno and seeing a psy. who feels it is all anxiety related along with my obsession about it I feel stuck. When the pain is bad I want to see another neurologist to confirm it is not Neuropathy and on good days I have no pain at all. My doc does not want to refer me to another neurologist because he says it feed my obession. He feels it is 100% TMS.(however he doesn't call it TMS) How does one stop the urge to see one more doc? Success stories?? I took two days off of work this week and I had not one twinge of pain. Go back to work burning pain. If one had neuropathy would you expect the same experience as my dad. Constant pain only dulled by medication. Mine is in no way constant, parts of my day I have no pain and some days none at all. I see my situation as so different but I can't seem to let go or accept my doc's explanation because he is not a neurologist. Sounds crazy, but I keep palying these mind games. Any suggestions might help me and others move forward. Actually today being the weekend I feel pretty good as long as I don't think about this. Thanks, Don |
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ladyblue
United Kingdom
50 Posts |
Posted - 09/24/2005 : 15:55:49
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Hi there,
I'm a complete novice Don having only just begun on the road to recovery (or is it discovery?)myself. I was sorry to read of your on-going difficulties and can sadly offer nothing in the way of medical understanding of the condition to which you refer.However whilst reading your post a few things struck me that had a familiarity to myself, they may be of no use at all Don but I'd like to share some observations I've made about myself that you may possibly find useful.
You refered in your post to your own "mind games". Incredibly good at them aren't we? I know I am. We choose to play these games even on a detrimental level but the first and most important thing, I feel anyway, is recognition of the fact that we do it.
For as many years as I can remember Don I've had a continuance of quite major things going on in my life, mostly unpleasant/sad/frightening/medical. I've dealt with them because that's what you do.
A couple of years ago whilst at College studying Counselling I was having a heart to heart with my tutor. I actually admitted to her that I felt completely lost when "nothing was happening" even if it were to be bad, simply because it's all I knew. She explained that it's like a negative "safe place".
Since then I've realised that as long as I have something going on in my life, even if it's pain, it offers me distraction from facing all the sadness/anger and frustration that I've never had the courage to feel from my past. The thought of finally facing it all frightens me still.
Then I read Dr Sarnos book...and there I was! A person in incredible pain beacuse of all the emotion that I hold inside. I've "preoccupied" myself for years now going from one specialist to another, researching all the latest alternative therapies etc etc.
Finally I've now arrived at the truth, I'm scared and yet excited, if that makes sense.
Is it possible that its that way for you too Don?
Wishing you all the best....Jane |
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chicago
85 Posts |
Posted - 09/24/2005 : 19:50:41
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Thanks Jane for your response. By the way i was born in London and moved to the USA when I was six. Still have family there. Your response does hit a cord with me. Since becoming a dad nine years ago I feel that I built up quite a few fears about taking care of my family. The pain certainly is a distraction. Most of the time I dwell on the pain and not how fearful I am about certain issues in my life. I guess people with TMS find it easier to dwell on the pain. I guess all we can do is hang in there and keep working on it. I sometimes wish it was easier. I get tired for trying to figure out issues. Maybe I'm trying too hard.
Don |
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ladyblue
United Kingdom
50 Posts |
Posted - 09/25/2005 : 09:28:04
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I understand what you're saying Don. I lost my partner/father of my two children 3 years ago in November, he was ill for 3 months and sadly passed away. I've found the responsibilty of being mum truely hard. My children are 17 and 8 and permanently going through "phases"! lol..you'll know what I mean. I constantly question if my decsions are correct, or if I'm firm enough, or maybe too firm and so on. But you know Don, there are no rights or wrongs. I think if you believe in any decision or choice that you make on their behalf and that it comes from the heart...then it's the right one for you.
Fear is quite contagious isn't it? If you allow it to creep into one area it soon spreads into another and before you know it and without realising it, you're feeling it all the time. it's not a pleasant feeling either and certainly not kind. I know that many times I've acted totally "out of character" because of the fear I was feeling inside and indeed...later regretted it.
On one level though I think we do have to accept that life will always be about exploration of ourselves, that's the way we grow. The important thing is always to take something positive from your experiences, no matter how traumatic they are.
Strangely enough, a few years back when I was battling with Cancer it took only a few weeks to find peace with-in myself, even with that amount of fear. The pain I have now is causing me more difficulties than I could have ever imagined, but I will conquer the fear "somehow" and I know that will then dissolve the pain.
Wishing you all the best in strength and courage...Jane
(BTW...I'm down in Kent...about an hour from London...only been there once though believe it or not and that was when I was 11..lol..I went to London Zoo!) |
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Pain comes and goes- Question
