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marytabby
USA
545 Posts |
 Posted - 07/03/2005 : 15:15:20
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I feel great, back is doing well, haven't had any pain in a few days. Tomorrow is the big 4th of July cookout with my family. They're all great, I am psyched to see all the dysfunctional members. Tee hee he. Truly I am looking forward to it. But now I am going about my day, preparing the food I am going to bring, and I keep obsessing to myself thoughts like: "what if my back goes out?"
"What if I wake up like I did on a few Christmases and I can't walk and I miss July 4th like I have on Christmas twice?"
Please, does anyone have any suggestions on how I can counteract this negative self-fulfilling thinking? It's not how I want to feel tomorrow. I want to go and have a good time. It's old habitual thinking I guess that's leftover and I don't want to lose my cool and end up with a bad back because I am obsessing on having one.
All suggestions appreciated ASAP. Thanks! |
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pault
USA
169 Posts |
Posted - 07/03/2005 : 16:39:39
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| It's always worse thinking about it,like going to the dentist.Worry is a big tool of tms ,try not to obcess about it as you have more control over your illogical,unconscious mind than you think.Be positive,remember your back is fine and you can handle anything. Have a good time! Not to worry, Paul. |
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Laura
USA
655 Posts |
Posted - 07/03/2005 : 19:27:16
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Mary,
I kept worrying for months about giving my speech at my daughter's bat mitzvah. I thought I would be so dizzy I'd fall on the floor. Guess what? Not only did I NEVER get dizzy (the entire day) but the speech went great. I was terrified but I had no problems. The worry for months on end was the worst part. Try not to stress and just enjoy talking to the whole dysfunctional bunch (that was funny what you wrote - I can totally relate!) Happy Fourth!
Laura
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crk
124 Posts |
Posted - 07/03/2005 : 22:22:22
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Hope I'm not too late to chime in here... Recently someone on this forum suggested a wonderful book called The Three Minute Therapy. Obviously you cannot run out and read it tonight, but I'll give you my best summary of the "good parts." It has helped me so much to put out little fires of recurring TMS successfully.
The MOST important message (since you already know the Sarno "daily reminders") is to confront your "musts." We have 3 kinds of "musts," requirements on self, others, and the world: "1) I must be, have, do etc. 2) Others must think, do, etc. and 3) the universe must be..." When you see yourself thinking these musts, your job is to dispute them. Example: my mother in law MUST think I'm a good cook tomorrow, or, I must have a totally amicable family holiday with no bickering whatsoever. OK, so next you say "wait a minute, why must it be so? What is the evidence that my world be just the way I want it? There is no such evidence." Lastly, you change your thinking to "although I strongly prefer that my mother-in-law admire my cooking skills (or whatever triggers you), there is no guarantee that she will. I cannot control other people and I do not live in a perfect world." The intended result of this shift in thinking is that you may feel disappointed by situations, but the rage that causes TMS will not occur.
By the way, this is not a book about TMS, but I think every TMS patient might benefit from reading it.
Happy holiday everyone,
CK |
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marytabby
USA
545 Posts |
Posted - 07/04/2005 : 02:52:45
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Thanks everyone.
And CK I think I'll check out that book.
I appreciate the tip. |
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Dave
USA
1864 Posts |
Posted - 07/05/2005 : 07:31:44
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quote:
Originally posted by Maryalma8
"what if my back goes out?"
The answer to tell yourself is: "It won't. I won't let it. I'll recognize it's TMS and ignore it and not let it get that far."
It's very important to accept that the days of debilitating pain are over. It doesn't mean you won't have pain, but that you will succeed at ignoring it and not allow it to gain the momentum necessary for a full-blown attack. |
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Laura
USA
655 Posts |
Posted - 07/05/2005 : 12:00:36
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Mary,
Dave is right. The other day my back started to hurt and I thought "Oh, no, not that again." Then, I told myself "This is nothing" and "there's no reason what I'm doing right now should hurt my back." Within minutes, the pain eased and was gone.
Laura
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Need suggestions ASAP - help
