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dgreen97
122 Posts |
 Posted - 05/15/2014 : 19:57:36
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hi balto,
i had a question about your success story i was hoping you would answer. ive read hope and help for your nerves and the book "at last a life" by paul david. both share the same concept.. ACCEPT ALLOW DON'T RESIST. i just recently started implementing this into my life around mid march and have had some success with it and failure as well. for almost 6 years i fought my eye strain symptoms tooth and nail, resisting them, not allowing them, and trying to make them go away. accepting the pain being there and allowing it to get worse is so foreign to me, so i wanted to get your experience on this. did the pain get worse when you began accepting it and allowing it to come and did you just remain calm in spite of this? thats what is happening to me right now.. im accepting the pain being there and it will get worse. i still remain calm but wanted to know if this is normal in the healing process. it feels so unnatural and against my instincts to allow myself to hurt like this but from what ive read in your success story and those 2 books that seems to be the way out. not to mention i spent 2 months in a partial hospitalization program for exposure therapy that taught the same concept.. to allow the feelings to be there and not to react to them with fear. what do you think of all of this? is it ok for the pain to increase and is this normal when you are accepting and allowing it to be there?
all i know is that fighting it for the last 5 1/2 years hasn't helped. it didn't change my symptoms and made them worse at times. im still new to this acceptance methodology of overcoming anxiety induced pain which is what TMS is so I wanted to get feedback from you because you've healed yourself from years of pain by doing this method and wanted to hear your experience with it as you began allowing and what happened during the time of your healing.
thanks
alex |
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balto
839 Posts |
Posted - 05/16/2014 : 11:04:19
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Hi Alex, I don't go the the forum as much as I used to due to my new work schedule and also due to the forum lack of traffic.
We all understand acceptance a little different. To me, acceptance is the equivalent of "I don't give a shi t", "so what", "who care", "life goes on"... or as Forest Gump said: "life is like a box of chocolate..."
You have eyes strain, so what, just go on and live your life with eye strain. Prioritize everything else but your eye strain. pay attention at everything else but your eye strain. Focus on love, on work, on being compassionate to other, on your religious, on car, on movie, on ... whatever , not your eye strain. Think of your eye strain as if you were born with it. If you are black, white, or yellow, or green... whatever, accept that you are black, white, yellow... treat it as a non issue. Give it no weight, it is there, live with it. Unconcern is the goal. Total unconcern is the goal. It get worse, it get better, who care. It come and go, who care.
If you can achieve a mentality of "total unconcern about any of your tms symptom, it will disappear. When? again, who care.
Alex, the human creature have only one goal and that is to survive. Any thing that signal "danger" in your mind will produce "fight or flight" respond. And that respond if allow to go on and on, overtime will produce tms symptoms. Normally when the "danger" signal is gone the body go back to normal and tms symptoms disappear. But for us tmser's, even when the original "danger" signal is gone we still have symptoms is because we now have a new "danger" signal, which is "FEAR". We fear our symptoms. So if you can stop your fear of your symptoms, if you can be totally being unconcern about your symptoms, you kill the "danger" signal and you will get rid of your symptoms.
For many of us it is hard to stop the fear feeling. But you have no choice. There is no other way to defeat tms without eliminate fear. No matter what or who's method you use, you will not get well if you are unable to get rid of the fear of your symptoms.
So learn all you can about how to get rid of FEAR and you will be fine.
Hope this help.
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No, I don't know much. I'm just here to share my experience. |
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dgreen97
122 Posts |
Posted - 05/29/2014 : 07:53:05
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thanks balto,
im currently listening to claire weekes audio and reading her book again, and I read Paul David's book as well. They all suggest the same thing you did, no concern for the symptoms but to live your life normally like they don't exist. Getting to this point I think is the biggest struggle because I (like all of us) place so much importance on getting rid of of the symptoms so we can live a normal life again, so we concentrate on them every day trying to get rid of them.
The new stomach churning symptom I've gotten I repeated the same pattern of becoming fearful of it and its continued because of that. My question is does it really come down to:
You have on choice but to not fear it. No matter what you do, you can't allow yourself to fear the symptom no matter how bad it gets?
If I wake up in the morning, have churning stomach, have the eye strain, I have to move on throughout my day as I normally would and give as little attention as possible to it correct?
Writing about this makes it sounds so easy... but in reality its the most difficult thing I've ever done. I've only recently begun accepting my symptoms and it is by far the most difficult thing I've had to do. It's utter surrender in the worrier's mind like "ok, im not going to worry anymore, let whatever happen happen". that feels like I'm letting my guard down, giving up, letting the symptoms take over and eventually consume me.
I wanted to ask you how you took claire weekes message and put it into practice for yourself.. how did you get the courage to push through your symptoms no matter what and not fear them to overcome your pain and all of the other symptoms your mentioned?
for example, if I wake up in the morning and have the churning stomach, or the eye strain, how would you approach it? even if its worse than yesterday, even if you went to bed last night feeling a lot better, how would you approach yet another day of feeling like crap and gather the courage to move forward yet again in spite of it? |
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stocktrader
30 Posts |
Posted - 09/16/2014 : 18:35:39
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Moving this up.
"I am calmed relaxed, patient, and confident" |
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Question for Balto about accepting pain
