| Author |
 Topic  |
|
|
Ryan_TX
5 Posts |
 Posted - 09/20/2013 : 13:51:47
|
Hello all,
I have been struggling with back pain for over 4 years now. I have been trying to heal myself with the TMS method for 8 to 9 months now with no luck reducing my symptoms yet. I have been lurking here and reading posts, but it seemed like a good idea to actively participate in this forum to help get unstuck.
A little about myself. 30 year old dude, married, with a desk job. I have tried every conventional method to heal my pain that the various doctors I have seen over the years, all kinds of injections prolotherapy, chiro, two rounds of phys. therapy. None of it gave me any relief. The only thing my MRI has shown is mild scoliosis, but none of the doctors have ever really latched onto that for being the reason behind my pain. The pain never leaves, but the level does go up and down randomly. I was taking pain pills for years to manage my pain, but really have tried to not take them unless I have too.
My pain is mainly in my mid back, however, my lower back will hurt more than my mid back at times, especially if I am standing. My neck will hurt sometimes too. Sitting really brings the pain on. It seems that the mere pressure that the back of the chair exerts on my back muscles (wherever that particular chair is touching my back at the time) causes the pain to worsen. It is bad enough where I had to have a sit/stand workstation installed at work so I can rotate sitting and standing.
My pain all started out of nowhere. I just woke up with it one day. In fact laying and sleeping are also triggers of my back pain.
When I read Sarno's books, it all made sense to me, but I have the type of personality that craves information. I have read almost all of the TMS books, and yet I still struggle. It makes so much sense that what I have is TMS, but I haven't been able to convince that last part of me. Sometimes I will get in the grove of acceptance, but then my pain will peak for a while and bring down the confidence.
I need some reassurance and support at this point. I want to stay the course. Do I sound like I have TMS to you? Should I try to see a TMS doctor to help cement the diagnosis in my head?
In summary, here is a list of why I think this is TMS:
-Originally woke up in pain out of nowhere.
-Had just been recovering from Mono for 2 or 3 months when it hit, and was worried that I would have it forever (health worry).
-I had a falling out with one of my best friends that I think preceded the onset of my pain (was a while ago so I cant exactly remember which one happened first).
-In the first year of relationship with my (now) wife when the pain started.
-Conventional treatment has done nothing for me.
-Hot showers and baths do give me temporary relief (heat = more blood flow?)
-Sometimes my pain does go done to a point where I don't even notice it.
-Most of the pain feels like its coming from the muscles on either side of my spine.
-The bulk of the pain can move up or down my back, depending on position.
Funny thing is I think typing this out has helped calm me down in a way. Glad to be here.
|
|
|
gigalos
Netherlands
310 Posts |
Posted - 09/21/2013 : 13:10:01
|
It all looks very TMS'ie to me.
You are building evidence along the way, which should help cement the conviction that it is TMS.
Hot showers/ baths help because it is soothing. At least, that is my opinion.
The pain starting from nowhere and laying/sleeping triggering it I do recognize in myself. I think the laying/sleeping is either conditioned or it is because your mind often starts to wander when you are in a lying position. It is like the mind recognizes this and wants to prevent that by amplifying symptoms.
I also have a slight scoliosis, as many people do by the way.
I wonder if reading all those books equals working on yourself..... |
 |
|
|
Peregrinus
250 Posts |
Posted - 09/21/2013 : 13:54:00
|
quote:
Originally posted by Ryan_TX
Hello all,
-I had a falling out with one of my best friends that I think preceded the onset of my pain (was a while ago so I cant exactly remember which one happened first).
-In the first year of relationship with my (now) wife when the pain started.
Tex:
Everything else you said is irrelevant. Sure you have TMS but now its time to figure out why you are so angry, resentful, humiliated, etc.
Good Luck. |
|
|
|
Ryan_TX
5 Posts |
Posted - 09/22/2013 : 12:44:22
|
| I wish shaking the fear was easy. Sometimes I can accept the pain, but when it is at its worst, its difficult. I do think the fear is just as unpleasant as the pain. What does everyone tell themselves when their pain or symptoms are bad? |
|
|
|
balto
839 Posts |
|
|
Beefy
USA
3 Posts |
Posted - 09/26/2013 : 13:10:10
|
Hey Ryan, you story sounds very similar to mine. I have been lurking the forum for a while but decided to post for the first time. I have no doubt in my mind that my problem is TMS, I share your symptoms of the pain moving around in my back and being sensitive to pressure.
I have been doing pretty well lately by just going for it and moving and bending like normal again with no fear...well the fear comes but I ignore it and its been working. I think the fear is what turned a case of sciatica down my leg a couple years ago into my whole back, traps and neck hurting.
I'm 30 also and I share the personality trait of constantly being occupied with symptoms and researching them and trying every therapy imaginable to fix them. I have come to finally really believe that nothing is wrong with me and have stopped all that madness. All I do now is some bodyweight and kettlebell training to get back in shape so I can do martial arts again.
Its kinda funny when I first started really believing TMS was all my problem I felt like this deep sadness/fear inside of me, like something was upset that I figured it out.I feel that less and less as time goes on.
I think it would be beneficial for me to talk to a tms therapist but there is no one in my area. Maybe we can talk sometime.
|
|
|
|
Ryan_TX
5 Posts |
Posted - 09/30/2013 : 07:08:56
|
quote:
Originally posted by Beefy
Hey Ryan, you story sounds very similar to mine. I have been lurking the forum for a while but decided to post for the first time. I have no doubt in my mind that my problem is TMS, I share your symptoms of the pain moving around in my back and being sensitive to pressure.
I have been doing pretty well lately by just going for it and moving and bending like normal again with no fear...well the fear comes but I ignore it and its been working. I think the fear is what turned a case of sciatica down my leg a couple years ago into my whole back, traps and neck hurting.
I'm 30 also and I share the personality trait of constantly being occupied with symptoms and researching them and trying every therapy imaginable to fix them. I have come to finally really believe that nothing is wrong with me and have stopped all that madness. All I do now is some bodyweight and kettlebell training to get back in shape so I can do martial arts again.
Its kinda funny when I first started really believing TMS was all my problem I felt like this deep sadness/fear inside of me, like something was upset that I figured it out.I feel that less and less as time goes on.
I think it would be beneficial for me to talk to a tms therapist but there is no one in my area. Maybe we can talk sometime.
Beefy, its good to know you have similar symptoms and you know its TMS. I still have doubt try to creep back into my mind when the pain is real bad, but I am trying to get to 100% belief. Does sitting or laying bother your back? I am going to start seeing a therapist and hopefully a TMS doc too to get an official dx. Hope you keep doing better and better too. |
|
|
|
Beefy
USA
3 Posts |
Posted - 09/30/2013 : 13:29:41
|
| Sitting can sometimes, laying on my back can sometimes. Lately its when I try and push too hard to get back to 100%. I need to realize I have been scared of bending and exercise for so long that I have to introduce things slowly but make sure I keep progressing. |
|
|
|
SteveO
USA
272 Posts |
Posted - 10/02/2013 : 13:02:10
|
Don't push too hard to get back to 100%, the idea is to let go to get back to 100%. It's the constant pushing that got you the TMS. Time to let go.
Where are you in Texas? Have you talked to John Sklar?
You have every hallmark of TMS. The entire process of healing revolves around erasing doubt, slowly, but steadily. That's the concept, to take little truths, some re-enforcement, encouragement,persistence, and hope, to build a healing solution. But you shouldn't try to heal either. You go live without fear and the symptoms fade because they have no more purpose, because you're now living the better life. Trying to heal means you're TMSing, and body-focusing.
You're focusing too much on your body. Focus on becoming happier, letting more go, being more appreciative, enjoying life, and of course fear must fade into the background.
The diagnosis by a TMS physician can have a powerful effect, but I've seen people, with doubt, jump from doctor to doctor, never accepting the first diagnosis.
You know you have TMS, you don't need someone to tell you, unless you're putting off the hard life-work. If you've been cleared medically, then it's time to heal.
There are some TMS psychs who will Skype.
Steve |
|
|
|
Ace1
USA
1040 Posts |
Posted - 10/02/2013 : 14:48:07
|
| Steve is giving the best advice. Never fight TMS, you will loose, it goes away indirectly. |
|
|
|
Ryan_TX
5 Posts |
Posted - 10/03/2013 : 04:47:23
|
Thanks for the advice SteveO. I do need to just let go.
I have thought about seeing Sklar, but I read some really negative online reviews and was turned off. I realize those reviewers probably have JSBS ;-) and the internet is highly negatively skewed.
I do want to fly to see Dr Schubiner though. He seems like he spends a decent amount of time with his patients. |
|
|
|
Ryan_TX
5 Posts |
Posted - 10/05/2013 : 08:13:43
|
When the back pain is at its worst, and I'm sitting at work, I constantly shift positions in my chair or get up and walk around every so often. If I don't, the pain just keeps getting worse. What should I do?
A. Sit still and let the pain come and try not to fear it. Is challenging the pain like this the way to go, or am I sensitizing myself further and causing myself more pain and fear too early in the process?
B. Don't let the pain get to its worst by shifting and standing thus making the fear thoughts easier to contend with?
|
|
|
|
eric watson
USA
601 Posts |
Posted - 10/05/2013 : 08:53:50
|
quote:
Originally posted by Ryan_TX
When the back pain is at its worst, and I'm sitting at work, I constantly shift positions in my chair or get up and walk around every so often. If I don't, the pain just keeps getting worse. What should I do?
A. Sit still and let the pain come and try not to fear it. Is challenging the pain like this the way to go, or am I sensitizing myself further and causing myself more pain and fear too early in the process?
B. Don't let the pain get to its worst by shifting and standing thus making the fear thoughts easier to contend with?
Sit still and let the pain come and float through it is what id do
see if you try not to fear it your still fearing it so you need to just float. Floating is after you have faced the thought that your going to try this with all your heart, then you go ahead and experience it by facing it, floating is the process which you focus on the now, be in the now and with the pain till you desensitize yourself.
Its sort of like exposure therapy where you expose yourself to the pain a bit at a time till like in a month or so you will be able to sit the whole time without the conditioning and as long as you sit with confidence and a loss of fear it wont take more than a few weeks to break. You could beat it like Steve did in his book by setting through it all at once but that might cause to much anguish and get you to where you wont like it. Only you will know when you can do this, it takes persistence , dedication, study and disassociation like thinking of another area that doesn't hurt as you try deconditioning yourself. You have some great answers so far, your doing great, questions is how we heal.
Don't put a time limit on it though, if it takes more than a few weeks, keep going and finish. |
Edited by - eric watson on 10/05/2013 08:56:23 |
|
|
| |
Topic |
|
|
|
New guy with back pain, need help.
