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icelikeaninja
USA
316 Posts |
 Posted - 07/29/2013 : 10:18:55
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As I am realizing that the most sophisticated my mind becomes the more sophisticated my tms pain becomes.
What worked for me years ago certainly did not work this time around. This was a different more complicated type of pain and decision I had to make.
I have gained alot of insight and experience just about myself and have put the connections of life experience to my brain and thoughts patterns.
I left my stressful job in May because the bulk of my pain would be during those times. When I'd leave the pain would vanish for a few hours.
Currently I am on the verge of another job but it is taking forever because the coordinator submitted my background check info late last week and it takes 5 to 7 business days to get back. They have told me for the last three weeks that I am def onboard with this job but I need to wait for check.
I am going to write a success story I feel much sooner than I thought but I feel what is hindering me now is my idleness and just having nothing to do.
Has anybody been in a similar predicament? Where you left a stressful environment, got better, but had stuff lingering because you eventually got board with all the tms work and actually not working at all?
Maybe it is a sense of purpose thing? I am researching volunteer things here in NYC and there is a program with helping to train dogs for disabled people. A few years ago I lost my dog of 15 years and jump at any opportunity to walk a neighbors dog or just randomly pet dogs on the street.
I believe it is a lack or purpose that is just making this linger even if its not intense anymore.
**Sure I can lay down on a bed of nails and not have pain but why am I having back pain when laying down on a soft mattress? |
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stayfit65
54 Posts |
Posted - 07/29/2013 : 12:21:23
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Ice,
Yes, for me it could be boredom and looking for purpose to be. I have the feeling, like"what am I doing that is worthwhile?" I am working on that one in my journaling, trying to point out to myself what a good friend, mom, wife I am. My job is very stressful at times, too. I find myself wondering if I am in the wrong job, and is there something else I should be doing. That is part of the problem for me...I need to stay in the present and be content in it.
That is great you are having 99 percent days.
Stayfit |
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icelikeaninja
USA
316 Posts |
Posted - 07/29/2013 : 12:34:43
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Yes,
Now that I think about it, when the tms got bad I was always at a job I hated or felt like it was lacking purpose.
Thank you, I am very happy and fortunate to have 99 percent days. I have a feeling the last 1 percent resides in boredom.
As a society we are always compared to others and to some extent when people are telling you how great they are or just blowing wind it can make you feel bad even if deep down you know that it is not the truth and these people might be trying to hurt you or make up for something they do not have.
Haven't had children yet but I am sure that is a whole new ball game that I cannot possibly understand or try to.
We tend to treat others better than we treat ourselves. When do we realize in terms of children etc that the parent needs to be healthy to take care of the child. Which one can argue is a huge pressure.
I neighbors ex wife is dieing from colon cancer that is inoperable because it is sitting on a nerve that would paralyze one side of the body if they take it out. She was mentioning to me yesterday how stresfull it is because she had to have a talk with her son and as rightfully so he was devastated.
I can only imagine the strain she is putting on herself because her body is failing and as a mother to her child and all the things that come with it.
**Sure I can lay down on a bed of nails and not have pain but why am I having back pain when laying down on a soft mattress? |
Edited by - icelikeaninja on 07/29/2013 12:36:17 |
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Only thing holding me back is me
