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mala
Hong Kong
774 Posts |
 Posted - 04/16/2013 : 21:29:04
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Many of you know that I have been here a while. My main problem used to be lower back pain, then neck, occasionally knees, sometimes stomach, most recently burning & irritation 'down there' with visible swelling. I also have a fibroid.
That's the physical stuff out of the way.
What I am asking is if you think i have Tms or not.
My past.
I grew up with an alcoholic father who abused my mother but was good to me.
I had a pretty bad temper growing up & would get angry very quickly but also get over it very quickly.
I went & lived with my grandparents from the age of 11 to 23. Very happy times.
I was NEVER sick till I was 40 I am 55 now.
I started getting aches & pains after my first surgery when I was 41,
My first back episode happened when I was 40 when my mother decided to 'have a go ' at my husband ' for something that only happened in her mind.
My mother is a pain but also vey loving and also a real bitch who doesn't get along well with people.
I have dealt with all this by journaling, talking etc etc till the cows come home.
The present.
Early retirement
Great husband.
Very close to my sis & her family.
Have friends that are supportive.
No financial worries, never have been. Unless some ghastly natural disaster, it's not gonna change.
Travel extensively in style & comfort.
Very flexible lifestyle. No great responsibilities.
I've looked at the Rahe Holmes test & nothing really jumps out.
I know it's a very difficult question but what do you guys think?
Am I wasting my time here?
Feel free to ask anything.
Thanks all
Mala
Mala Singh Barber. I'm on facebook. Look me up
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Ace1
USA
1040 Posts |
Posted - 04/17/2013 : 08:53:32
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| Yes Mala, this is TMS, you are not working on the real cause, the STRAIN. You have to change that being in a rush type behavior and hypersensitivity. This is very hard, but your type of TMS is clearly related to bad habits from childhood. |
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AnnieA
13 Posts |
Posted - 04/17/2013 : 09:25:10
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Mala,
I'm not an expert and don't know if yours is TMS, but one thing it took me a while to get is that TMS is about UNCONSCIOUS emotion - so you don't feel it or know why. Also - it can be about things that the conscious mind convinces you are not a big deal. I've stopped trying to search for exactly what happened to cause the TMS and this has relieved some strain.
I believe this because of what Sarno says and because of an experience I had. I don't want to go into detail, but a long repressed emotion was triggered and it was very powerful and makes me believe that repressed emotions that never are triggered can have effects such as TMS. |
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RageSootheRatio
Canada
430 Posts |
Posted - 04/17/2013 : 11:04:19
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hi Mala,
You said many positive things about the present, but in another thread you also said:
quote:
The whole idea of aging is enraging to me & I find it very difficult to come to terms with it. I do not like what I see in the mirror & I am very critical of myself.I am not one of those people wh can grow old gracefully.
Also ... I believe you had said some time ago, that you tend to do everything rather in a strained, hurried way? even things like cooking, when you have enough *clock time* to relax and take your time and enjoy the process?
In terms of Rahe Holmes, I do have to agree with All1Spirit's take on it, that it doesn't include for example, the more chronic things wired in from one's childhood. Unlike "specific discrete incidents" which happen and which tend to have more clearcut "beginning middle ends" the things which are "wired in" from earlier times can become chronic and have long-lasting effects.
I don't know if anyone other than yourself can TRULY answer the question as to whether you have TMS or not. In my own case, I'm not sure of anything at the moment, but reducing strain no matter what, can't be a bad thing!  - RSR |
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Singer_Artist
USA
1516 Posts |
Posted - 04/17/2013 : 17:04:38
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I have the same fear of aging, Mala..and I think it adds to my TMS symptoms as well..You are blessed to have so many good things/support in the present..I think the exercise of writing 5 things a day you are grateful for is very helpful..I am not as lucky in terms of current support from multiple sources, not in the geographical area I currently live, that is..Even though your present is good, repressed emotions from a tough past can definitely spark TMS..
~Karen |
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mala
Hong Kong
774 Posts |
Posted - 04/17/2013 : 20:06:04
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Ace, I have been working on the strain & hypersensitivity. When I am not in pain or discomfort I am calm & do things calmly. When I am I pain however, I get tensed, hypersentive & all stressed out. 2 days now my shoulder has stated hurting causing a lot of tension in my neck & head & jaw & the fear just rushes into every cell & overwhelms me. I am physically exhausted. I,m in Phuket at the moment & not enjoying it one bit.
Annie I have pondered long & hard about what the source of the rage might be. Could it be this, could it be that but with no real 'aha moments'. What baffles me is that if it is TMS the why were there no physical symptoms the First 40 years of my life?
RSR, how r u doing?. Yes old age enrages me & the reason it enrages me is coz I associate it with pain, pain & pain & if this is what it's going to be like, I'd rather not grow old.
Karen, I'm sorry about your ankle but the advice you have been given by the members is spot on. I pray that things will get better for you soon. Wow how did you manage to lose so much weight, was it intentional? I am struggling to lose 5 kg.
Thank you all for yr responses.
Mala
Mala Singh Barber. I'm on facebook. Look me up
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Edited by - mala on 04/17/2013 20:08:03 |
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gailnyc
USA
80 Posts |
Posted - 04/18/2013 : 13:36:52
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quote:
Originally posted by mala
Ace, I have been working on the strain & hypersensitivity. When I am not in pain or discomfort I am calm & do things calmly. When I am I pain however, I get tensed, hypersentive & all stressed out. 2 days now my shoulder has stated hurting causing a lot of tension in my neck & head & jaw & the fear just rushes into every cell & overwhelms me. I am physically exhausted. I,m in Phuket at the moment & not enjoying it one bit.
Mala, I really believe you have to learn to respond to the pain without fear. Or, if that's not possible, let the first flash of fear wash over you, acknowledge it, and then continue. Otherwise you create a never ending pain--fear--pain loop that's hard to get out of. |
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Ok , I need your help. Is it TMS or not?
