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Fox

USA
496 Posts

Posted - 08/28/2012 :  15:14:55  Show Profile  Reply with Quote
To answer the question about what I am doing to help myself -- Not big on journaling (too antsy?) but may have to give that a try, am doing walking meditation in the am as always, and thinking psychological, am thought stopping when have a structural pain origin thought, am listening to audio tapes in car by Sarno and a new one by Schubinger, am rereading Fred Amir book (do I take a chance again on that approach and face more intense pain? That is the primary question), have a stack of other TMS books laid out to read for the first time after that Amir book, have Sarno's DVD out to look at again, am throwing full range of full force air punches at home at times to let out anger and to show myself I can't make the pain any worse (may have to let loose on the heavy bag in the garage), going over my list of traumatic events from childhood to the present, thinking about current relationships...The pain subsided a bit this morning but came back this afternoon with full force (had long meeting to face and panicked that I will still have this pain when my son comes back from college to visit this weekend). This is a bit longer a spell than usual.
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bryan3000

USA
513 Posts

Posted - 08/29/2012 :  01:22:49  Show Profile  Reply with Quote
I still believe the lack of support is your trigger. Just my two cents.

I wonder though, is there any reason church would represent pain for you?

I also wonder what would happen if you went to the church outside of mass and practiced the steps slowly. Sort of like exposure therapy, alone.
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drh7900

USA
194 Posts

Posted - 08/29/2012 :  05:41:08  Show Profile  Reply with Quote
quote:
Originally posted by Fox

To answer the question about what I am doing to help myself -- Not big on journaling (too antsy?) but may have to give that a try, am doing walking meditation in the am as always, and thinking psychological, am thought stopping when have a structural pain origin thought, am listening to audio tapes in car by Sarno and a new one by Schubinger, am rereading Fred Amir book (do I take a chance again on that approach and face more intense pain? That is the primary question), have a stack of other TMS books laid out to read for the first time after that Amir book, have Sarno's DVD out to look at again, am throwing full range of full force air punches at home at times to let out anger and to show myself I can't make the pain any worse (may have to let loose on the heavy bag in the garage), going over my list of traumatic events from childhood to the present, thinking about current relationships...The pain subsided a bit this morning but came back this afternoon with full force (had long meeting to face and panicked that I will still have this pain when my son comes back from college to visit this weekend). This is a bit longer a spell than usual.



When you're going over your list of traumatic events, what is your intent and purpose? Have you ever allowed yourself to really feel the anger and rage and sadness and any other emotions associated with these events or have you recognized that these are possible pain points and just tried to acknowledge and move on? In my journey, I've learned that I'm not as forgiving as I once thought I was. What I thought was forgiveness was repression. I would tell myself not to be angry, to get over it...to move on and try to forget it. The problem is that you can't have true forgiveness toward these people and events until you have allowed yourself to really feel the emotions and get to a place where the anger has had a chance to "burn off".

Before I discovered TMS, I found myself in counselling because my depression was getting out of control. In the weeks that followed, I learned that I had some experiences from my youth that I would now say we're the source of repressed rage and anger. Back then I was told I didn't process those experiences fully and so they continued to evoke a strong emotional response when they came to mind. I think both statements basically say the same thing. I never allowed myself to fully feel the emotions and pushed them down.

The counsellor used a technique called EMDR to help me walk through processing the emotions. EMDR is supposed to help you fully process the emotions by stimulating both sides of the brain while you concentrate on events or emotions. It's a process...it's not instantaneous, but as I learned about TMS I realized it was just one of many techniques out there to get me to analyze, focus on and experience my emotions. you have to allow your mind to go through certain emotions until you can get to a place of forgiveness..not just a place of, "I don't want to think about it anymore so I'm going to forgive and forget"...rather a place of "no matter how much pain or anguish xyz caused me...it's now in my past and I have drained off the emotions. There's nothing left to do but forgive...and let go."

Whether that technique is EMDR, or EFT, or hypnotherapy, or journaling, or visualization, or guided imagery...the end target is you have to FEEL the emotions. You have to. If you don't, they'll never discharge. Then you have to feed yourself some positive emotions...again, through some of the above listed techniques, or Ace1's suggestions of mind power, or listening to music or comedy or playing games or getting on Skype with your son, or taking a walk and allowing yourself to take in the beauty of creation around you...but get yourself to FEEL the positive emotions just like you did the negative emotions.

I'm rooting for you!

--
Dustin
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Fox

USA
496 Posts

Posted - 08/29/2012 :  07:16:07  Show Profile  Reply with Quote
Thanks for reminding me that TMS work is not just an intectual process - you have to feel the buried emotions.
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Fox

USA
496 Posts

Posted - 08/29/2012 :  07:19:57  Show Profile  Reply with Quote
Meant to write "intellectual" process...Not very intellectual misspelling intellectual.
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drh7900

USA
194 Posts

Posted - 08/29/2012 :  08:38:17  Show Profile  Reply with Quote
quote:
Originally posted by Fox

Thanks for reminding me that TMS work is not just an intellectual process - you have to feel the buried emotions.



You know, there was a time in my life where I (think I) did a good job at feeling my emotions. I would say that I was more sensitive in nature before I joined the military. That's not to say that some of my TMS "causes" didn't start well before my military days, but when I joined the Army, I think I was forced to stop feeling my emotions for a short while just to survive...and and it became a learned behavior.

I got to a point where I over-intellectualize too many things. As a result, I think my TMS kicked in to full gear when I was injured (trigger point) and my body had an excuse to hurt. Interesting thought.

The worst part is that even though I say a lot of good things about feeling the emotions, I think it's one of the main points I still struggle with at this time. It most certainly is easier said than done.

And when I quoted you above...I used your corrected spelling of "intellectual"...out of respect mostly...but partly because it was fun.

--
Dustin
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balto

839 Posts

Posted - 08/30/2012 :  05:27:53  Show Profile  Reply with Quote
Hi Fox, in my opinion, I think you are too hard on yourself. You just let your thoughts and your emotions happenned without much guidance and control from you. You are torturing your body with your own thoughts and emotions.

I hope you don't mind I suggest that you should be more gentle and compassionate to your mind. Analyse your thoughts and choose to let go of the harmful thoughts and welcome more benefit thoughts.

For example, about your son, you should tell your mind not to worry about him. Tell your mind you have done a great job raising him. He is a college student now, bright future, healthy, and confidence. Congratulate yourself and be proud.

Then about the church steps. Stop thinking about what other people think, you have a little trouble with your legs due to tms, that's all. So what if you have to take the elevator, so what if you and your wife get there at a different time, so what and so what and so what... No big deal

Then about the meeting, hey, you are lucky to have a job, to have a meeting to go to. Look at all those unemployed and homeless people, they wish to be in your shoes right now... You got to be proud that you are contributing to your company, your society, ... You are useful and needed. The meeting will go OK...

I have not read Fred Amir's book, but I think if you challenge your pain with a peaceful and compassionate approach, you will come out a winner. Just keep remind your brain that all the symptoms are just tms, they are there because of your thought, your emotion. they will leave once you get your peace and confidence back. Just keep a "so what", "I don't care", "I don't give a Sh.." mentallity, look to the bright side of thing, count your blessing... you will be healthy again soon.

Hope you will soon.

------------------------
No, I don't know everything. I'm just here to share my experience.
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Fox

USA
496 Posts

Posted - 08/30/2012 :  07:07:29  Show Profile  Reply with Quote
Thanks for the extremely helpful comments. Many of them really hit home...Didn't mention that I plan to try Freudian psychotherapy if ever have the money (may be one of the 10%, per Sarno, needing it for complete resolution of symptoms - but I am doing so much better than pre-Sarno when I look back and take the long view).
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Fox

USA
496 Posts

Posted - 10/15/2012 :  07:35:18  Show Profile  Reply with Quote
Still having big time sciatic pain problems when I try to go up a lot more than 12 steps. I walk an hour a day - up a lot of hills - this must be TMS conditioning. My brother, whose back pain was totally cured by Sarno's methods, said to fight back - but very gradually. He said to try my work steps in the following manner - down 13 steps and then back up the 13 steps on the first day. Every day add one step until up to 30 or so. If get pain back off a few days for the pain to stop and then try again. Sort of desensitization. This make sense?
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tennis tom

USA
4749 Posts

Posted - 10/15/2012 :  09:34:41  Show Profile  Reply with Quote
Hi Fox, that sounds like a good idea. If you want to see an example of how intense it can be to break the TMS pain pattern, read pages 108-110 of SteveO's book about how he overcame sitting pain. The portion is titled: "Here Boy, Sit Boy--Good Boy...."

g'luck!
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EileenTM

92 Posts

Posted - 10/15/2012 :  19:29:31  Show Profile  Reply with Quote
My husband had horrible sciatica. He could barely walk and pain killers did not touch the pain. What worked for him was also really challenging the pain. At first he started walking a block and then jogging. He would yell at the pain to go away. Today, he runs half marathons at age 63, all thanks to Dr. Sarno.
I know Ace1 says not to fight the pain, but for my husband that is what has worked the best. Much like you set firm limits with an unruly toddler.
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andy64tms

USA
589 Posts

Posted - 10/16/2012 :  08:36:27  Show Profile  Reply with Quote
Hi Eileen,

The exact same thing happened to me in 2000. You can read about it in my success story Success from 2000. I thought I was the only person to challenge pain. I’ve written in many posts about this, you’re the first to comment.


Andy
Past TMS Experience in 2000, with success.
Back on Wiki Edu Program day 15
Charlie Horse on neck for 20 years. (to be evicted later.)
Books:
Healing Back Pain
Unlearn your Pain
The Great Pain Deception

Edited by - andy64tms on 10/16/2012 08:37:33
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