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art
1903 Posts |
 Posted - 07/29/2011 : 08:53:20
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quote:
Originally posted by wrldtrv
Kyle, everyone has some difference in hearing between left and right. The same with vision. I notice the same thing. It would be unusual if that were not the case.
True. Even more important it seems to me is that the very act of going around trying to discern what are no doubt subtle differences between the two ears is classic TMS fear/worry/hypochondria. Until you get a handle on worrying and obsessing about your body there will be no peace.
Understand that there are ALWAYS counter-arguments and doubts as to whether something's TMS or not. In the end, it's a leap of faith. |
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Kyle M.
24 Posts |
Posted - 08/01/2011 : 00:21:45
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quote:
Originally posted by wrldtrv
Kyle, everyone has some difference in hearing between left and right. The same with vision. I notice the same thing. It would be unusual if that were not the case.
Your post actually helps a lot, wrldtrv. I know that's true, but it's reassuring to hear someone say it, I guess. I'm glad to hear you got past your tinnitus, too, by the way.
quote:
Originally posted by oneorbit
Just a few questions to add:
1.Had you any recurring physical problems as a child? Were you pretty much tip-top until this all started?
As a matter of fact, I had a conversation with my father a couple of nights ago, recounting all of the physical ailments I've had through the years, thinking in retrospect they were probably all TMS or at least partially TMS-related.
I did have periodic back pain when I was in elementary school, to the point where I started going to a chiropractor. The doctors and my parents just chalked it up to growing pains, though.
A little later--around middle school, I'd say--I began having problems with heel pain, to the point where I couldn't run in phys ed class for a few weeks. I saw a podiatrist, got special gel heel insuls for my shoes, and that was the end of that.
Then I started having teeth pain, and was going to the dentist once a month, thinking I had a cavity. Everything would check out fine, though, and the pain would soon go away, only to crop up in another tooth a few weeks later. I've never had a cavity in my life but in one baby tooth, by the way.
Finally, the year before graduating high school, I had an allergic reaction to a muscle relaxant (which I was taking for unexplained back pain, now that I think about it) that caused my throat to swell up, and I had to be rushed to the hospital. For about six months following that traumatic incident I became extremely paranoid about my throat: I'd think it were swelling up for no reason or that something that I ate had gotten caught in it.
So I guess I've always had TMS and hypochondriac tendencies, but I never really sat down ant thought about it before.
To answer your question in a different way, though, I've always been very active and never really had any troubles staying that way. I did have the above back and heel problems periodically, but I was never that kid who was constantly sitting on the bench during gym class or anything. Far from it, in fact, and I even commented to my brother a few months ago that all this recent stuff suddenly popped up all at once following the initial knee injury, adding that it was as if a switch went off in my brain telling me, "Hey, you! You're mortal, after all!"
quote:
Originally posted by oneorbit
2.Why did you give up on girls after the failed relationship? With the internet it seems even easier to meet people these days.
I just have low self-esteem in this department, unfortunately. In high school, I wasn't really anything special looks-wise, and I had a hard time getting a date because of that. Girls liked me, but they didn't like me, you know? I was always the male friend that you see in those John Hughes movies, basically.
By the time I got into college, however, I like to think I managed to actually blossom into a pretty presentable fella, but I was so used to being rejected throughout those formative years, I guess, that I've never really gotten past my self-esteem issues.
After college, it just became so much harder for me to meet people in general, let alone women, and I became more focused on my career, that I decided I'd put the whole relationship thing on hold for a while. Internet dating has never really appealed to me, either.
And then all of these symptoms started, and that's basically where I am now.
quote:
Originally posted by oneorbit
3. You've read the book twice but have you actually gave yourself a solid month of just believing in the diagnosis of TMS?
Not really, no. I'd say I last about a week at best before I start thinking, Nope. It must have been the loud music. I damaged my hearing permanently, and I'm going to have to live with this noise and pain for the rest of my life. And I really, really don't think I can do that, either, so I don't know why I can't manage to at least give the TMS diagnosis more time to sink in. If nothing else, it's far more productive than the "permanent damage; no chance of healing" diagnosis, anyway.
quote:
Originally posted by oneorbit
Do you feel like your unappreciated. I bet you do. But I bet your not. I bet you have friends and family that truly care about you but because of this pain you might be avoiding true feelings. Exactly the intent of your brain putting you in this pain.
Probably. My brother is going through his own career problems right now, and it seems like the only time he ever calls me (not that I can really talk on the phone right now, though) is to complain about his own troubles. I'm usually thinking the whole time, At least you have a job and an apartment. Not to mention your health!
But my bro's my best friend, and I know he cares. His attitude toward this whole situation is not unlike my father's, though: he takes this hard stance of, "If you want to get better, then get better. Sitting their moaning all the time isn't going to fix anything!" And I appreciate it, because I know sometimes tough love is what I need. But I also can't help but feel that that's easy for them to say; they're not the ones living with this constant pain and screeching in their ear!
quote:
Originally posted by oneorbit
I am offended by the Dr. that called this a 'moaning group'. Just becasue the are not taught about nutrition or psychoanalysis they immediately right people of as batty and complainers.
Well, he wasn't really talking about this board. He refers specifically to tinnitus "support" groups as "moaning clubs," and I have to admit that after joining and participating in a couple before finding out about TMS and this board, I'm inclined to agree with him.
The doctor who said that (Dr. Hazell) is one of the co-founders of tinnitus retraining therapy, the crux of which is based upon teaching the patient that tinnitus is a benign phenomenon that isn't due to irreversible or permanent damage. It's close resemblance to the way one overcomes TMS symptoms is actually how I found out about TMS through Google.
Most of the tinnitus support message board I joined, however, had people on there saying how they've had tinnitus for this many decades, how it's only gotten worse in that span of time, and that you basically just "learn to live with it." I didn't really find any of that information particularly helpful, and, in fact, Dr. Hazell is of the belief that reading such things actually perpetuates and can even worsen one's own tinnitus.
Just to be clear, though: everyone here has been absolutely great! I'm very much encouraged rather than discouraged every time I come here and read a new response. So thank you all!
quote:
Originally posted by art
Understand that there are ALWAYS counter-arguments and doubts as to whether something's TMS or not. In the end, it's a leap of faith.
I know. And I'm having a really hard time making that leap, unfortunately. But I really appreciate all of the encouragement you've all offered me in the meantime. It's helped me several times already, in times of doubt, to come here and read through these responses again. So thanks again. |
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eliuri
USA
50 Posts |
Posted - 10/02/2011 : 06:06:44
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Hi Kyle:
Was going to post my own experience with recent onset of tinnitus, but saw your write up here.
Tinnitus--unilateral only- came on in my case about two weeks ago after a very stressful few months following loss of my spouse and overwhelmed with difficulty coping with my son who is going through bereavement, anger, etc.
There's also a sense of fullness in that affected ear, and it's hard to fully hear what's being said while the hissing or buzzing sounds are going on. I'm too distracted by those sounds in that ear I guess. So it's hard to really say for sure if there is or is not real hearing loss here. Seems not to be when the tinnitus lets up, but harder to hear on that side when it is going on. I'll probably send a post to this group about this, since the one book by Dr Sarno I have (Mind-Body Prescription) says little about this. Does he say more about Tinnitus in his other works, by any chance?
I've had a long history of TMJ on that very side with the tinnitus-with history of teeth clenching, muscle pains, headaches and "tooth aches" not related to the teeth themselves. The TMJ--as well as severe tension headaches--had acted up around time of onset of the Tinnitus, about two weeks ago.
Like yourself, I have this tendency to over-research medical issues, in part because I cant afford most treatment, so I have to be my own diagnostician, but mostly because this brings focus to the symptoms and in a sense empowers them. Perhaps helps me evade real life issues...
I did order the Tinnitus Retraining Book from the group you speak of based on the Jastreboff model. They seem somewhat oriented along "Sarno lines" I know I cannot now afford Tinnitus Retraining Therapy, But I was thinking I might get a better handle on it just from reading the book. I'm wondering if Dr Hazell there might be willing to communicate with me via email as he did with you, until I get some grip on this and before it gets out of control. I have read about the: "tensor tympani syndrome" and it would explain a lot,especially its association with tension headaches and the TMJ. Except that the buzzing /ringing in my case is of a high frequency or a hissing like sound and is pretty much there most of the time. The "tensor tympani syndrome is believed to be completely psychosomatic and self-limiting as you say. So I'd be interested to know if that's what might be going on here. If it is, maybe I can just give this one a rest, and deal with the overwhelming emotional and parental matters.
I was struck by several things in your post. I too had a long bout with "prostatitis" years ago. It essentially crippled me for years and was treated with many rounds of antibiotics for an apparently non-existent infection. The prostatitis resolved once assured by an acupuncturist that it was stress caused, which was almost impossible for me to accept at first. Tai Chi and acupuncture did dramatically help with that as well. It took only about three or four weeks to resolve a malady which had disabled me for years. Was mostly the reassurance, I think.
I suffer from Irritable Bowel Syndrome, TMJ disorder, tension headaches, tendonitis in my legs (not sure if this one's physical) as well as generalized Anxiety Disorder and Panic Attacks. I'm deeply hoping that this new appearance of tinnitus in my case is just one more TMS manifestation and not a sign of imminent hearing loss.
So like you Kyle, I'm hoping for some guidance here with this newly emergent Tinnitus. I would be curious if this: "tensor tympani syndrome" turns out to be behind all this though.
Let us know how it goes...
-Eliuri
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Edited by - eliuri on 10/02/2011 06:20:03 |
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Sarah Jacoba
USA
81 Posts |
Posted - 10/04/2011 : 00:09:56
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I never had tinnitus but I'm a professional musician and I had a round of hyperacusis that was severely scary....until I realized it was TMS and it gradually faded. I've also had the urinary problem, so I guess the fact we both have had both complaints would bolster the TMS argument
--Sarah Hyacinth Jacoba
"When dream and day unite" |
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Kyle M.
24 Posts |
Posted - 10/04/2011 : 17:53:12
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Hey, Eliuri. Sorry to hear about your troubles, particularly the loss of your loved one. Your tinnitus and ear problems sound eerily similar to mind, even in terms of the tone of your tinnitus. For what it's worth, I'm very slowly buying into the Jastreboff model of tinnitus, as I do now notice times where I don't hear the tinnitus, even when I do go "looking" for it, so to speak, which would imply to me that it is indeed a normal signal that most people just aren't aware of. Once you key into it, though, it seems to become the proverbial genie let out of the bottle. It's hard to forget about it completely after you become aware of it.
Also still dealing with the feelings of discomfort in my ear, similar to yours, I imagine. I don't know about you, but with me, I can do this thing where it almost feels like I'm separating something in my ear. I'll get a popping sensation in there sometimes, while other times it almost feels like there's Velcro in my ear getting pulled apart. After that, I'll experience some mild relief from the fullness feeling, but it's extremely temporary. I'm actually thinking about scheduling another appointment with the otologist I saw earlier in the year, just to verify that there really isn't anything structurally wrong in there. I was put on a three-month dose of a diuretic early in the onset of my symptoms by this same doctor, but it didn't do a thing for either the fullness or the tinnitus.
For me, though, I'm extremely phonophobic now. I mean, I don't even like to take a shower anymore (Don't worry, though, because I still do, guys ) due to the noise, and I tend to watch television with the closed captioning on, as an explosion, gunshot, or even someone raising their voice, even with the volume low, is liable to send me into a fit of paranoia about my hearing. It's ridiculous now how one moderately loud noise can ruin my entire day, and I have to wonder if that paranoia isn't perpetuating my symptoms, both the ear discomfort and the tinnitus. Obviously, when I'm worried about my hearing all the time, I have to think that at the very least I'm checking on my hearing on some subconscious level, which my be tensing up muscles in my ear and also forcing me to "find" the tinnitus signal without even trying.
Anyway, Eliuri, hang in there. I would definitely recommend contacting Dr. Hazell after you've read all of the material on his website. Be warned that he was pretty blunt with me, but I actually appreciated that. He's almost of the attitude of, "Snap out of it! There's nothing wrong with you!" in his correspondents, but I think that tough-love approach is probably the right one. His turn-around time was great, too. I'm in the U.S., and he's in England, and I'd say he got back to me in about two days after I e-mailed him. So give it a shot if you want. It certainly can't hurt.
Good luck, and I hope you feel better soon. And thanks for your kind words to me, as well. |
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eliuri
USA
50 Posts |
Posted - 10/06/2011 : 06:19:47
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Thanks so much, Kyle.
I'm reading Dr Jasterboff's book: Tinnitus Retraining Therapy, as well as some research on the somatosensory aspects of this. As I read this book, I'm seeing it increasingly along the TMS model.
I can readily alter the level/pitch of the tinnitus by gently pressing almost anywhere on that side of my face. (Thats what is meant by "somatosensory", I guess) Generally this makes it louder, so that merely putting my head on pillow makes me vulnerable. I do have many sore muscle points along that side of the face where the tinnitus is. Much of that chalked up to the TMJ/TMD syndrome. Even gentle pressure on the other side makes it a bit louder as well, while that's going on. So it will get more noticeable as my head presses on the pillow. This does interfere with sleep, especially if I worry about things like impending hearing loss. Much less troublesome during the day.
My hunch is that if I get through some period of time feeling reassured I'm not about to "lose much in the way of hearing", this might begin to fade somewhat. As I said, I only have any difficulty hearing when the tinnitus is annoying, and much of that is from that stuffy feeling in the ear which accompanies it. I'm not quite sure what you're doing to make it go away even temporarily. Is there any way you can describe that "technique" better? It's quite an annoying sensation, and makes it hard to focus on what someone is saying to me.
At this point, I cannot at all afford the Tinnitus Retraining Therapy recommended in Jasterboff's book. Certainly can't afford being fitted for those sound generators worn in the ear recommended as part of TRT. So, I'm afraid I'll have to improvise some of this on my own. I'm wondering if simply getting certain kinds of tapes and a good CD/MP3 player or something might help with this. And also question whether to to use headphone only on the affected ear. Do you think Dr Hazell from that center might be willing to suggest something imporvisational along those lines? Did you email him directly or via that tinnitus.org website? From what you write, it seems he might be amenable to giving such guidance.
There's been way too much silence and isolation in my life lately, rather than too much noise. This became clearer to me while reading Jasterboff's book.
This tinnitus thing is still a new intruder with me . Been with me for only three weeks now. Possibly, its been around longer, and I never really noticed it. So I'd like to nip it in the bud, before it gets to be a chronic disruptive thing. That's why I'm thinking to get those tapes. I would like to know the optimal way to do this.
I recall something similar in the way of tinnitus from when I was a child. It came on during a period my father was yelling a lot, and kept losing his temper. His rage attacks were scary and dangerous. So I thought the howling and buzzing in my ears--around age 10-- was replicating his screaming and the cryings of my siblings in reaction, as the volume kept getting louder and louder. It was much more unbearable then than the tinnitus I have now. Much of all that is coming back to me now. I have this irrational fear of raising my voice at my kids even when I'm supposed to be assertive with them, because of my own childhood trauma. Three weeks ago, I did raise my voice in anger at my son while misbehaving. I felt so horrid about it,since he so recently had lost his mom. He himself was actually in a better mood the next day. Its highly possible that I hadn't raised my voice as loud as I had thought. I did agonize over it. Could well be that I only heard it as too loud. This does happen to me. But within a day or so after this episode with my son, the tinnitus arrived in my ear as an unwelcome visitor...Wonder if all this is really connected or just coincidence..
Anyhow, thanks for your kind words.
How would you suggest to best contact Dr Hazell about a question or two on this?
-Eliuri
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Edited by - eliuri on 10/06/2011 14:30:56 |
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Kyle M.
24 Posts |
Posted - 10/07/2011 : 17:49:12
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Eliuri, I contacted Dr. Hazell through his website. He stresses that you read the material he has presented on it first, though, before contacting him, so make sure to do that.
As far as doing TRT on your own, go for it. Dr. Hazell does have some tips on the website in varying sections on how to go about doing this, even. Be sure to read the other readers' e-mails on his site, too. There is a lot of good information in many of those, and I think it helps to read that a lot people are suffering from the exact same symptoms as we are. He also stresses in one of them that if you're attempting to do self-administered TRT, to do it for both ears, even if the tinnitus is only present in one.
In regards to popping my ears: I really don't know how to describe it. It's as if I'm stretching or tensing a muscle in the back of my throat or something. I'm not quite sure how I do it, but I can tell you that the nature of it does suggest to me that my problem of "stuffiness," for lack of a better term, could very well be due to musculature.
Getting back to how your tinnitus started: if you're asking me if I think your raising your voice could have somehow caused it physically, then I severely doubt it. I'm sometimes paranoid about the volume of my own voice (again, I'm pretty phonophobic now), but I simply remind myself that if everyone who raised their voice damaged their hearing, then every professional athlete on the planet would be deaf by the time they retired.
If, however, you're asking if the tinnitus may have started from that instance with your son thanks to TMS, then in my limited knowledge of the disorder, I would say the answer is absolutely. I can see that exchange between you and your son bringing back some pretty bad memories, and rather than your subconscious allowing you to dwell on those painful thoughts, it created your awareness of the tinnitus signal in order to distract you from the supposedly far more dangerous psychological scars of your past.
Again, I consider myself a novice at all this TMS stuff still, but that would be my whole take on the matter. Hope that can maybe somehow reassure you a little bit with regards to the nature of your tinnitus.
Anyway, I hope you feel better soon. Also, if nothing else, if you're worried about your hearing, I would recommend getting a hearing test. My insurance is pretty lousy at the moment, but it nevertheless covered all but $15 of the bill, so if by knowing that you're hearing isn't at all abnormal for your age might give you some reassurance, I would say it's definitely worth the cost and time. Best of luck to you, though, in whatever you decide to do about it. |
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MarkD
41 Posts |
Posted - 10/24/2011 : 11:52:41
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Chronic prostatitis is almost always TMS. SARNO told me so and I believe him.
Also has anyone recommended the book by Kevin Jarvis to you. Its called Personal Underworld
http:// stores. lulu. com / kjarvis
I read and re-read it and it really helped me. I haven't had a flare up since
Now, if I could have the same results with this nasty "sciatic" nerve pain otherwise know as TMS in my leg... |
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golden_girl
United Kingdom
128 Posts |
Posted - 10/24/2011 : 16:20:13
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I also believe 'interstitial cystitis' (one for the women!) is almost always TMS too (just putting it out there in case anyone comes to the forum and searches for it).
I've read Kevin's book too by the way, and it was interesting, but I found it perhaps more relevant to men (not that that's a bad thing obviously!)
My version of it, which I always knew was 'TMS' or just really anxiety, is very slowly improving at the moment - just simply by ignoring it, and trying my best to not give it any time in my day. A very important point, that's oft been discussed but I'm finally putting it into practice :)
"F.E.A.R.
Forgive Everyone And Remember
For Everything A Reason"
Ian Brown |
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Kyle M.
24 Posts |
Posted - 10/28/2011 : 21:08:34
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quote:
Originally posted by MarkD
Chronic prostatitis is almost always TMS. SARNO told me so and I believe him.
See, I wish I knew this ten months ago. I'm 100% convinced that the prostititis was psychosomatic, and that's why I'm so upset over the tinnitus. I feel like, because I got upset over something that wasn't actually real, I played my music too loudly one night, and now I'm stuck with something that is for the rest of my life.
It's just awful, too. I haven't been out to eat at a restaurant for nine months now. Or shopping. Same goes for listening to music. I basically won't leave my house for anything short of a doctor's appointment. I hate sound now; I fear it, and I used to love listening to music. It was the one thing I had while dealing with the prostititis that made me feel a little bit better, but I don't even have that much with the tinnitus. Adnd the more time that passes, all the while my ear continues to bother me and the sound refuses to dissipate, I become more and more convinced that I screwed myself over, permanently. And that's what's so depressing for me. |
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golden_girl
United Kingdom
128 Posts |
Posted - 11/02/2011 : 18:01:54
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Kyle, I spent 3 months not leaving the house because of anxiety-related bladder issues/TMS (I'd literally walk into my front garden and have to run back in case I needed the toilet - it was that bad!)
I'm a lot better than that now, sure I'm not perfect, but it took me 29 years to get here, and it won't take me that long to get back, I'm sure! :)
I could stay in my house, and I could say "Well, **** it, I hate anxiety, and I hate needing the toilet, and I hate ******* everything and why do I have to feel this way" (have said all this many times!) or I CAN say "Well, I know it's anxiety, and I know it can't kill me. Really I'd rather be deaf/dumb/blind/excruciatingly embarrassed in front of the whole world, rather than live my life in these four walls so **** that, I'm off!" It really is about a change of mindset. I don't know how up you are for reading other books, but 'What To Say When You Talk To Yourself' by Shad Helmstetter (http://www.amazon.com/What-Say-When-Talk-Yourself/dp/0671708821/ref=ntt_at_ep_dpt_1) is a great one - the day to day dialogue we have going on can be the very destroyer of us.
I'm 100% convinced that the prostititis was psychosomatic, and that's why I'm so upset over the tinnitus. I feel like, because I got upset over something that wasn't actually real, I played my music too loudly one night, and now I'm stuck with something that is for the rest of my life.
How do you mean?! You recovered from something that was TMS - let this be the incentive, the guide, and the realisation to recover from another form of TMS! I had IBS, now have IB[ladder]S - it comes back, if we're still doing the same old ****! Do you really believe that you did something one day, something you'd done tons of times, something you love - and you broke yourself? Something that can't even be broken, like a bone can? I went shopping one day, had a panic attack, mentally redirected it to my bladder, and sure, I haven't been the same since - but I ain't permanently broken! Learned behaviours, repeated patterns, negative thoughts - all can be reversed.
I wish you all the luck in the world!
"F.E.A.R.
Forgive Everyone And Remember
For Everything A Reason"
Ian Brown |
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MarkD
41 Posts |
Posted - 11/04/2011 : 09:32:55
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Kyle,
You have to get out and go to restaurant (or somewhere else besides . You can't stay inside. It will only get worse. Go with a friend who understands your situation.
I cannot walk because of my pain in my leg. My wife forces me every day to get up and walk even if its too the end of the driveway.
I hate it and it hurts but I know one day soon, it won't.
good luck and you are not alone. |
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Kyle M.
24 Posts |
Posted - 11/04/2011 : 20:43:52
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Just wanted to say thanks for the pep-talk, Golden Girl. Everything you said makes a lot of sense, and I'll take it to heart. I'm also always up for reading anything that might be of help to me, so thanks, too, for the recommendation.
Mark, I'm sorry to hear about your own situation, and I know you're right about needing to try and go out. Every weekend I tell myself that I'm going to go see my brother, but I always chicken out in the end.
I try to walk sometimes in the evening, just to get out of the house, but even though we live in a fairly closed off neighborhood, we still get traffic every now and again, and the road noise frightens me. Despite the fact that I used to jog and walk around here all the time without any problems, now I'm afraid of it, and I need to get over that, I know.
Matthew, thank you for the invitation. If I'm around my computer at 4PM tomorrow, I'll try to drop in, but I'm usually practicing my Kenpo at that time on Saturdays. Thanks for the invitation all the same, however.
Thanks again, everyone. This really is a great message board, and I'm glad that I found you all. |
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tennis tom
USA
4749 Posts |
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Swollen Knee->Prostatitis->Tinnitus: TMS?
