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JoeyT
USA
25 Posts |
 Posted - 03/11/2009 : 16:43:10
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Well as I said in a previous post Sunday night at work was pretty bad after having a very good weekend. Monday night was alot better. But again last night I took another step back with even worse pain. Again just like the Sunday the first half of the night was good. But the second half was got pretty bad...I talked to my brain the whole night and not think physical as best I could but the pain continued... I did not break down emotional like I did sunday night but this is exhausting.
I continued with my light exercise routine and find that my pain does not start until a hour or so after. I feel NO PAIN WHEN I WORK OUT. I find this very telling.. Also when I am bend or lifting objects in my job I have little to no pain... But if I am just sitting or standing around I start to have intermitten pain..
I also find it telling that this new round of pain has slowly worsened since I discontinued all physical remedies. It has been about 3 weeks since I stop wearing the back brace at work and stop taking NSAIDs and started back working out..... I notice within a few days after removal of the back brace that I could bend and lift with relative ease. I find it odd that if it was physical that why am I able to lift and bend with really no pain at all, even when I work out...If it was physical would it not seem logical that I should feel pain as I am going some of this physical things and not and hour of two or even two or three days later...
I think since I have started treatment my mind has declared war to not let go of the TMS..I say this because when i thought it was a physical problem and did all the physical remedies (back brace, lift with your legs, back exercises and don't work out.. ever) I had less pain, but I thought I was partially handy capped with really no hope of getting back to the old me.
Has anyone else had this experience were it seemed the mind was fighting back.. I think one of my problems is my obsessive thinking and negitive thinking.. Negitive thinking is what gone me in this mess I think to begin with..Do you relize that before I had all of the MRIs and blood work I thought maybe I had the following problems. First was MS, than a brain tumor, than Fibro. All of this because I think so negitive. Everything will be the worst case...Just like with my back I feared it would get worse and worse and I would not be able to work lose my job, my house etc...Everything is the worse case with me..Normal people don't act like that...As I look back on my life I think I always had some of that in me but not to this extreme..I think maybe since I have been living on my own this past 6 years I have felt vunerable (sp).. And anything that pop up that was unplanned or unwanted put fear and anxiety in me...Whether it was a plumbing problem, car issue or a break in which also happened in my case..
Sensei Adam Rostocki and I have emailed back and forth and he tells me to throw out any time table I have as for as recovery.. My question is should I maybe layoff of the gym until I can get more comfortable with TMS. Sometimes I think it makes me focus on my body more....
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kalo
USA
142 Posts |
Posted - 03/11/2009 : 17:28:39
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quote:
Negitive thinking is what gone me in this mess I think to begin with.
Hey JoeyT,
Wow, you sound EXACTLY like me!!!! I catosphize EVERYTHING and have dealt with Mounds of Hypochondria/Obessional Thinking!!!
In reading your post you are really paying attention to the pain. When it hurt when it doesn't i.e. could it be this, could it be that? This is OBESSIONAL!!! This is what is keeping your TMS going!!!
I shouldn't be talking because I am suffering as well and tend to check my symptons EVERY day, i.e. every minute of the day! The first thing I do in the morning when I wake is see if the pain is getting any better...Then during work in the office I check again and again!!!
What we are both doing is giving the TMS EMPOWERMENT every time we check and or wonder?
I think this is the CRUX of TMS, worry, fear, checking and also if you're like me you will do "the calander phenamona" which is my pain started on this day and it's been over a month it should of gone away by now....
My own only advise and something I am going to start tomorrow myself is NOT to think physical!!! I am going to stop check my pain every 5 minutes, and I am going to STOP seeing what exercises or things I do worsen it as this is only conditioning my mind to pay attention and making it worst...
Hang in there it's tough but I believe you can conquer your TMS and same goes for me...You'll be fine!!!
Kalo
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JoeyT
USA
25 Posts |
Posted - 03/11/2009 : 18:25:22
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Hello and thanks Kalo
I completely agree that my obsessing over pain and body is my main obstacle but I don't know how to turn my mind off...That is why I am wondering if working out is not good for me at this moment and time..
I think back to when I was on 1st shift and there was so much going on and so many more people and distraction that my mind was lead into none physical directions...I had alot of people on 1st (co workers, office people, truck drivers, that I enjoyed talking to...Now I am on 3rd with only 3 other people and it is total the opposite..Sometimes I can here the wind blowing outside this huge warehouse its so silent in there. There is very little talking with the 4 of us and I think that allows my mind to go to work... In other words I need something to distract my attention...
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positivevibes
204 Posts |
Posted - 03/11/2009 : 22:56:22
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Not obsessing over the pain, not catastrophizing, not letting the fear grip you and take over your life....these are the hardest obstacles I've had to face, as well.
You don't totally have to stop taking the NSAIDs. See how you feel. Maybe you can take less on some days. I know that NSAIDs can be a bit of a crutch. Dr. Schubiner doesn't tell people to stop taking their meds. As the program goes on, if you feel less pain you probably want to take less meds. A chicken-and-egg sort of thing. Or maybe instead of NSAIDs you can just take some Tylenol instead for a few days.
I agree about not giving yourself a mental timetable, but it can also be difficult...you've been in pain for some period of time (longer than you want to be) and you want it to end right away. You have to view it more as a longer term process...see the overall picture as a gradual healing. Celebrate small victories. I'm not totally better, but I am feeling better than I was last week. I'm taking less Ibuprofen than I was a few days ago. Maybe one day in the future I won't need to take it anymore, but I'm not there just yet. Don't beat yourself up about little stuff like that. Try to see the bigger picture.
I said elsewhere recently....that TMS feeds on fear. When you feel afraid, you wind up hurting more. You have to make yourself stop going down that mental path that leads to fear. Examine your emotions; examine your feelings instead. What's going on in your life besides the back pain that is causing you distress or conflict?
Your intuition is wondering if perhaps this has something to do with being on your own (for the first time, I presume) for the past 6 years. You may want to examine that whole scenario and what feelings are connected to "being on my own."
Here's a neat technique I learned that you could try in addition to regular journaling. Put "being on my own" in the middle of a piece of paper. Then do a free association with that phrase...say the phrase to yourself and then write down whatever pops into your head. Don't censor anything that that you think of. Just put it down. You might be surprised where it leads you! It's a cool technique that really helps to clarify issues! |
Edited by - positivevibes on 03/11/2009 23:05:14 |
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kalo
USA
142 Posts |
Posted - 03/11/2009 : 23:23:13
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quote:
I completely agree that my obsessing over pain and body is my main obstacle but I don't know how to turn my mind off...That is why I am wondering if working out is not good for me at this moment and time..
Hey Joey, Well let me first start off by saying that anxiety/obessing is TMS Equivilent! I have both! Mine will start off with "what if" and "what if" will lead into another catasterphize thinking, etc.
I remember about 6 years ago I suffered from a herniation in my neck. I worked out at the gym and BAM I got home with sevre pain!!
Seriously, I started researching the net and heard all this horrible stories about people suffering from aliments ie.e herination, thoracic outlet, etc!! They never got better! This of course was PRE DR. SARNO days. I NEVER heard about Dr. Sarno! IT SCARED ME!!!
Well, my life took started spinning out of control my neck pain escalated out of control!!! MY FEARS and WORRYS escalated out of control and to be honest I thought I was going CRAZY!!! I basically stopped living and quickly became depressed and all I could think about was PAIN!!!
My doctor put me NSAID rest and I TRIED EVERY TYPE OF THERAPY there was!!! My pain started going from the back of my neck, shoulder Scapula (I even had myofasical rope impigment) all the way two BOTH my arms. Finally my doctor sent me to a neurologist!
I remember going the neurologist taking all those nerve test and then going for an MRI!!!
I had to wait two hole weeks for my test results. By time I went back to for my test results I was crying right in his office because fear and worry was out of control!!!
My MIND produced so much pain caused from stress and worry that I thought it was the end of me.
My neurologist had to calm me down before he could read the results! He did confirm a herniation, but guess what??? He told me that I should NOT have this kind of pain and for me to get back to my normal life..I looked at him SHOCKED AND STUNNED!!!
He told me to get help and not medical help but pshycological help!!! Thinking back this was the best thing he could of told me and what blows my mind is he WASN'T a TMS doc. that is what is so wierd about this. Remember this was PRE SARNO DAYS!! I guess I was lucky in a way!! I didn't like what he told me, but somehow I knew he was right.
I asked him if he thought I had MS or all those other diseases and he said NO you're fine and then I told him...So you think I am crazy and he replied, "no I think you need help"...
I got help and I don't advocate this but the only way my mind calmed down was getting on antidepressants and talk therapy!
After being put on antidepressants my mind CALMED down I was no longer OBESSED with the pain I was having!!! I still had pain...But the coolest thing out of all of this is I FOUND OUT about DR. SARNO!!!! I found Dr. Sarno through reading Carla Kantors book about health anxiety...She mentioned Dr. Sarno in her book!
The first book I read was The Mind/Body disorder and it made so much sense to me!!! It gave me such relief and hope!!!
I am not going to lie to you I had pain on and on for many years...I am happy to say that I've been pain free in my neck for TWO YEARS!!
Since I've gotten off antidepressants and believe me it was not easy!! Again don't EVER take them...
So, why am I posting...Because I have OTHER TMS Equivelent which scare me just as bad!!! But the difference is I am much better educated to not go off the deep end...I do suffer from health anxiety and when it starts to get out of control I realize that this too is TMS!
TMS always has a way of fooling the mind it NEVER fails!! The brain is TRICKY!!!
Now going back from one person who suffers from health anxiety to another I am going to tell you someting STOP seeking Resurrance for your pain...Like whether it is really TMS or it is abonormalities iny your spine!!!
Don't keep seeking for reasssurance??? Because you will always find away to DOUBT information!!! Believe in what Dr. Sarno says and for get about the medical profession!! Think how many people have been healed with Dr. Sarno!!
There is a lot of PROOF on this forum of people who have been cured of back pain, RSI, Knee pain and many other aliments!!! Before Doctor Sarno they too had debilitating pain and now they are pain free!
Please don't give up and ACCEPT the pain for what it is!!
Work on the emotional!! TMS is sneaky and once you conquer you're back pain it will creep up somewhere else...But with the knowledge you'll be better able to deal with it..
Hang in there!!! Kalo |
Edited by - kalo on 03/11/2009 23:34:50 |
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JoeyT
USA
25 Posts |
Posted - 03/12/2009 : 00:39:06
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PV and Kalo thank you so much...I think i need to take a step back and go at this with a slower mind set as far as healing.. It will take some time...
I apologize if I come of as a winny SOB. I know peolple on hurt worse than me..
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Elorac
United Kingdom
41 Posts |
Posted - 03/12/2009 : 04:36:56
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Hi Joey,
I have just read "What to say when you talk to yourself" by Shad Helmstetter, and it has really helped me with regards to negative thinking.
Carole  |
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kalo
USA
142 Posts |
Posted - 03/12/2009 : 10:04:06
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I apologize if I come of as a winny SOB. I know peolple on hurt worse than me..
Joey, your not being winny!!! We all have some sort of pain and fustration and need support and advise!!!
Kalo! |
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Capn Spanky
112 Posts |
Posted - 03/12/2009 : 10:41:39
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Originally posted by positivevibes
You don't totally have to stop taking the NSAIDs. See how you feel. Maybe you can take less on some days.
I certainly respect you, pv and Dr. Shubiner, but I can tell you my elbows did not get better until I quit all treatments including NSAIDs. It was extremely scary!
My belief is I have to show my brain I no longer believe there is anything physically wrong with me. If I continue any form of treatment it shows I'm not really convinced.
I will say however, that the pain went away fairly quickly. If it had stayed around for a long time, I may not have had the strength to stay away from the meds. |
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kalo
USA
142 Posts |
Posted - 03/12/2009 : 11:04:40
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Can I ask one questions concerning NSAID?
If mild oxgen and blood flow is the cause of TMS pain how would any type of NSAID help?
I think this why so many types of treatment fail because TMS has nothing to do with something being inflamed?
I am correct on this theory? |
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mizlorinj
USA
490 Posts |
Posted - 03/12/2009 : 11:37:43
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Correct Kalo. Dr. Sarno says nothing is inflammed. That's what he told me when I told him the doc prescribed me prednazone (sp?).
I agree w/ CapN, taking the nsaids or still doing p/t does not convince your brain that you believe it's not structural. For me that wasn't an issue. I tried both nsaids and p/t and neither brought any relief from the pain so it was easy to dismiss them as useless! I then immersed myself in Dr. Sarno's program and that's when my complete healing occurred.
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Here I am again...
