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celloLWF
USA
49 Posts |
 Posted - 10/30/2008 : 11:22:39
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Sometimes I clearly develop TMS pain when I'm extremely happy about something, but for whatever silly social code reason I can't express my strong feelings of happiness. In these cases, the burning back pain or splitting headache is assisting in the repression of unbelievable joy and bliss.
For example, I knew I was in love with a girl I worked with but couldn't tell her, and so I got a splitting headache to prevent my exploding with passion and just kissing her at work.
I know some of you will think "well the pain is from rage that resents the lack of expression" but I prefer my interpretation. The happy feeling is causing the pain! If I wasn't in love, I wouldn't have to repress my joy.
What do you all think about this extremely threatening emotion, 'happiness?'
Loren
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mizlorinj
USA
490 Posts |
Posted - 10/30/2008 : 11:45:20
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Being in love is, yes, a happy feeling. Not being able to express it though creates conflict, and conflict (internal or external) creates TMS.
I can't say I feel pain when I am exuberant about something--unless there is a hidden fear. . . "it's too good to be true", "this can't last" or similar thoughts that squash such happiness.
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Edited by - mizlorinj on 10/30/2008 11:48:02 |
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hkp
47 Posts |
Posted - 10/30/2008 : 12:30:05
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If you check out Dr. SChubiner's web site his on-line lecture clearly outlines how happy events (having a baby, getting married, etc.) can trigger TMS. The best explanation I've seen for this is in Dr. Dave Clark's 'They Can't Find Anything Wrong.'
He talks about "good-partner-bad illness' syndrome where someone who has repeatedly had bad experiences (bad relaitionships, bad family, bad jobs) upon finally finding a healthy and good relationship, develops all this internal rage about how they deserved better in the past. It's happened to me. I think it's kind of profound.
hkp |
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mizlorinj
USA
490 Posts |
Posted - 10/30/2008 : 12:47:52
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What HKP lists above (baby, getting married) are on the Holmes-Rahne scale--life events. Some on the list are indeed happy events, but can be stressful because they are a change in life circumstance. I found the list to be interesting. Some I would not have thought of.
check it out. google: holmes-rahn scale |
Edited by - mizlorinj on 10/30/2008 12:48:41 |
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scottjmurray
266 Posts |
Posted - 10/30/2008 : 15:10:57
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i think it's probably like... you are pissed off because there is a piece of you that doesn't let you express how happy you are. that's the rage ingredient.
---
author of tms-recovery . com
(not sh!t, champagne)
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winnieboo
USA
269 Posts |
Posted - 10/30/2008 : 21:15:08
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I think it's the repressed emotion.
I recently got a new boss that I was extremely attracted to. I think of it as an old-fashioned "crush." I'm happily married and so is he, so taking any kind of action--I didn't even consider it. However, every time I approached the office, even the car, I was IN PAIN. Until I understood TMS...it resolved when one day, I went into the office and I started talking to the boss, very casual conversation, but on another frequency I allowed myself to think "you are so hot! I have a crush on you! I feel nervous when I'm around you! I feel like I can't even talk!
And guess what? My pain went away in the office and never came back!
I realized that the boss ISN'T A MIND READER. It's okay to think whatever I want, as loudly as I want and as often as I want and NO ONE HAS TO KNOW! And with that realization, I relaxed! Miraculously, the crush went away and now I just really like and appreciate the guy. I can enjoy an appropriate, relaxed relationship. He's a great boss--I still think he's really cute, and that's just pleasant and nice and fun--and I enjoy seeing him and seeking his advice, pain-free, when I go into the office. |
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celloLWF
USA
49 Posts |
Posted - 10/30/2008 : 22:01:33
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| yes, I love the story about the boss. That sound like my experiences. Good idea. Become comfortable with expression the joy inside. |
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skizzik
USA
783 Posts |
Posted - 11/02/2008 : 03:53:49
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quote:
Originally posted by winnieboo
the crush went away and now I just really like and appreciate the guy.
hmm..wow..this is the first i've ever heard of a crush going away by concious actions. It's as if a crush has the same pathways as tms. The more you fight it, the worse it gets.
Acceptence of the crush, de-amplifies it. Crazy, but it makes sense.
I see you mentioned winnie that when you where in crush mode that you were "happily married". It was as; if you gave into the feelings of the crush, then you would be telling yourself your'e not happily married and be wrecked w/ guilt. As if fighting the feelings was the right thing to do.
But you said "f-it, no-one can read my mind" and gave into the feelings, and all that happened was the crush went away and your'e still happily married. Again, crazy, but shows that non-acceptance of feelings amplifies whatever we are resisting, and acceptance of feelings keeps us in the flow of life.
Someone get Hellny and Hillbilly on the line! They could eat this up!
This would also explain why women in my presence are always complaining about physical ailments
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JohnD
USA
371 Posts |
Posted - 11/02/2008 : 10:53:43
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| I like Winnie's thoughts and experiences on this subject. Basically what Winnie is talking about is that she owned up to how she was feeling and processed through it and that made the "crush" more of what it actually is. When something is repressed, or not dealt with or acknowledged in some way then it becomes bigger than it is. |
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winnieboo
USA
269 Posts |
Posted - 11/02/2008 : 16:46:41
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Skiz, you are very funny! I'm glad the real-life example was helpful.
I like John D's words "owning" the feelings. That's exactly it.
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Edited by - winnieboo on 11/02/2008 17:06:17 |
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JohnD
USA
371 Posts |
Posted - 11/02/2008 : 19:38:13
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Skiz,
Can you explain that last sentence of your post. It sounds like something that myself and others can learn a lot from, but I'm not sure exactly what you mean? Are their physical ailments a result of something you are doing or not doing? |
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mizlorinj
USA
490 Posts |
Posted - 11/03/2008 : 07:23:05
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JohnD, I'm thinking it was Skizzy being cute.  |
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JohnD
USA
371 Posts |
Posted - 11/03/2008 : 10:19:54
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| Haha... I think you're right...that skizz pulls out the funny jokes just when you least expect it |
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skizzik
USA
783 Posts |
Posted - 11/04/2008 : 04:41:24
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quote:
Originally posted by celloLWF
Sometimes I clearly develop TMS pain when I'm extremely happy about something
The happy feeling is causing the pain!
What do you all think about this extremely threatening emotion, 'happiness?'
Loren
Yes. Just ask JohnD. He is pain free! And he apparently achieved it by avoiding the threatening emotion of happiness altogether.  |
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TMS from happy emotions??!!
