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MRosenthal
USA
30 Posts |
 Posted - 12/19/2004 : 08:42:23
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| Everytime I tense up the muscle in my lower back when I do pushups or something like it, I get a horrible spasm that lasts a month. How can I possibly ever try to gain confidence to do more pushups again? If I get pain for a long time, how can you get past it? Once in horrible spasm, even with the strongest confidence, my pain does not end. I must wait out the month in misery. I will never be able to work out again with these symptoms. I have recently made myself really aware of many of my deepest angers and fears. My symptoms have not changed. Nothing is working. Then, sometimes when I am not thinking about anything but my back, my pain subsides for some time. There is no pattern to this. Whether I do the work or not, my pain comes and goes when it wants. I am starting to believe that this site becomes just a life time of posting with problems. I mean how long do we have to talk about TMS to get it to work. I am 26 years old, but I guess I will be posting the same things until I am 70. All I am asking for is a hint that this is working. I am trying hard. |
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Baseball65
USA
734 Posts |
Posted - 12/19/2004 : 08:58:41
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Hi M.
That's great!
You would only be trying that if somewhere deep in your psyche,your brain is finally not believing in the TMS.
Now...Let's be real for a minute.
I just checked your user ID history,and until about 3 weeks ago,you were vascillating between wanting this to work and viciously attacking it.I still sense a little bit of doubt.
In HBP(which I just reviewed on CD) Sarno is crystal clear that the resumption of all physical activity is absolutely necessary when the patient has had some respite from the symptoms and is relatively confident in the diagnosis...if this has not happened the patient is only going to scare themselves and promote further fear
I am sure you are trying hard,and the fact that you were willing to do that shows that you are truly committed,but you just haven't let it sink in long enough that there is nothing structurally wrong with you.
As far as "making yourself aware of your deepest angers and fears"....if it's unconscious anger and fear,you couldn't DO that...oh you might have moments that people on the forums call "aha's and eureka's" but in general it is a slow and lumbering process....the deepest angers and fears are generally right next to us and soo terrifying that we don't get perspective UNTIL the episode is History....I now know what was bugging me during the majority of my symptoms...back than I just had an inkling.
Now....the stuff that's really bugging me today?? I'll know about it in about a year...in the meantime if any psychsomatic process begins(and I have a few suspects) I continually run ALL possibilities thru my head...the worst ones...my wife leaving me,me really NOT liking her,my children pissing me off,dying...etc...
I assume you are 100% convinced that what you have is TMS?
keep doing the work...it HASN'T been that long
peace
Baseball65 |
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Dave
USA
1864 Posts |
Posted - 12/19/2004 : 09:46:15
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The push-ups are a classic case of conditioning. You get the spasms exactly when you expect them. As long as you live in fear of doing push-ups, your brain will never give up this convenient distraction. Nevertheless it's best to stay away from that activity while you focus on getting better.
Your frustration is understandable but you have to adjust your attitude if you expect results. For many people, it takes months before you get significant relief. You haven't been working at it for more than a few weeks.
You have a mountain of doubt to overcome. Your posts here clearly demonstrate significant skepticism about the TMS theory. Someone in your position needs to have blind faith that it will work, and weather the ups and downs along the way. If you don't think long-term, the treatment will not succeed. |
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tennis tom
USA
4749 Posts |
Posted - 12/19/2004 : 09:52:22
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| Dave and Baseball65, excellent and thoughtful replies! Thank you. |
Edited by - tennis tom on 12/19/2004 09:54:57 |
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chicago
85 Posts |
Posted - 12/19/2004 : 18:23:28
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| It's difficult but you can't project what's happening today into the future. It just makes you more anxious and more in pain. When I get fearful that's what I do and I pay for it. I have to remind myself to chill out and roll with the punches. When I can do that I'm successful and when I can't, and sometimes you can't I experience more significant pain. I don't mean to preach I'm just relating my experience. |
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Irish Jimmy
USA
52 Posts |
Posted - 12/20/2004 : 09:28:28
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MRosenthal, Don't fall into what Dr. Sopher calls "The Calendar Phenomenon", this is when you put your healing on a time schedule by thinking "I should be better by this DATE/TIME". Or wondering "how long will this go on?" I did this, and once I let this go, I improved more.
If you keep with TMS, you'll experience little successes that you can build on. Once you have these improvements, however small, you can write them down and use them to remind yourself of the improvements you've made. This has helped me. Build on the successes, even if they are fleeting; Don't give up, and try to understand what postures or situations are conditioned to bring about pain in you.The conditioning will go away, when you find out it is just that,- conditioning. If you are not journaling, you may want to try. Good Luck.
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Afraid...How to fight the fear?
