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mjwebb05
24 Posts |
 Posted - 09/13/2008 : 07:49:45
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| Boy that subject is hard to write...but it is true! I must be over stressed and under-emotionally expressed these days. i've had some level of back/leg pain since Tuesday (its now saturday). I'm going back to journaling, pain talk, self-talk, etc. Anyone else go through this on here, and have you been successful in getting back to no pain quickly?? |
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mjwebb05
24 Posts |
Posted - 09/13/2008 : 14:14:34
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| I know this isn't a "sexy" topic, but anyone??? |
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Peg
USA
284 Posts |
Posted - 09/14/2008 : 14:34:50
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Hi,
I can appreciate what you're saying when you comment that it's hard to write. I've beaten myself up for years because I wasn't TOTALLY, permanently, symptom free. Of course being a perfectionist, I needed to recover perfectly.
I found Dr. Sarno's information about 8 years ago and had a slow, gradual recovery and return to activity. I've expereinced several episodes of pain (different than my original problem-upper back and neck)over the years but they were always associated with strong emotions and the need to deal with or express them.
The difference after knowing about TMS was the key. Knowing what was really going on allowed me to not be scared out of my wits and catastrophize about the future. Instead, I would try to stay calm, reassure myself, grab the lastest book from my Sarno library and re-read, journal about what was going on in my life, talk to someone, and take care of myself. The pain would gradually fade and resolve.
Sounds like you're on the right track. Good luck
Best
Peg
In questions of science, the authority of a thousand is not worth the humble reasoning of a single individual. Galileo Galilei |
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mjwebb05
24 Posts |
Posted - 09/14/2008 : 16:18:17
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Thanks, Peg. I am doing exactly what you recommended - that was my plan as well, but I just needed to hear some reassurance from people on this forum who I know have been here before!! I have had a couple of days before this past week in the past six months where things have flared up, and I went back to journaling, self talk, etc and it cleared up within a day. This time it has been a bit longer (almost a week) and that had me doubting and frustrated. I can feel myself getting over it though now, and hopefully will be back to pain free in another day or two. It's just so hard when youre used to being pain-free and jogging, etc, just living life without the pain, ya know?
THanks again,
M |
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mjwebb05
24 Posts |
Posted - 09/14/2008 : 16:19:42
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Thanks, Peg. I am doing exactly what you recommended - that was my plan as well, but I just needed to hear some reassurance from people on this forum who I know have been here before!! I have had a couple of days before this past week in the past six months where things have flared up, and I went back to journaling, self talk, etc and it cleared up within a day. This time it has been a bit longer (almost a week) and that had me doubting and frustrated. I can feel myself getting over it though now, and hopefully will be back to pain free in another day or two. It's just so hard when youre used to being pain-free and jogging, etc, just living life without the pain, ya know?
THanks again,
M |
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Peg
USA
284 Posts |
Posted - 09/14/2008 : 20:35:31
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Yup, sure do.
Remember, we're only human.
Sometimes I think the severity of the symptoms relates to the emotional issue at the time. Although the perpetuation seems to relate to our reaction to it. Just thoughts.
Best
Peg
In questions of science, the authority of a thousand is not worth the humble reasoning of a single individual. Galileo Galilei |
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Dave
USA
1864 Posts |
Posted - 09/15/2008 : 09:51:59
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quote:
Originally posted by mjwebb05
...I must be over stressed and under-emotionally expressed these days...
The fact that you said this is a great sign that you "get it" and you should be able to get out of this relapse pretty quickly.
It is not uncommon for TMS symptoms to re-appear. In fact, I think everyone who is prone to TMS will have incidences of psychogenic symptoms for the rest of their lives. Some dispute this, but I feel it is beneficial to accept it. Then, when the relapses come, you can focus your energy on identifying the emotional causes, rather than feeling frustrated or worse, going back down the physical path. |
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RageSootheRatio
Canada
430 Posts |
Posted - 09/15/2008 : 10:35:09
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Thanks for this thread. It is reassuring, as I think I may be having a kind of "relapse" myself now, after 9 or 10 months. What is interesting is that I don't know if I could call it a "relapse" in that I realize how much my thinking has changed. I haven't "panicked" or stopped doing things in my life (in fact, still expanding more and more in some ways) and have a completely different attitude to the pain, when it comes. I don't fear it or feel defeated about it, like I used to.
I HAVE started going back to my Sarno materials and *thinking* about journalling again. I realize now I haven't actually started journalling again in earnest because the emotional issues in my life are just too painful! So that of course gives me hope that the "relapse" is indeed just TMS again and I will be able to resolve it again over time. Peg, thanks for your comment about "Sometimes I think the severity of the symptoms relates to the emotional issue at the time." That and your other reassuring comments/insights are very helpful to me. |
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Peg
USA
284 Posts |
Posted - 09/15/2008 : 16:32:59
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Well said Dave. I think it has been hard for me to accept that I will be prone to this for the rest of my life.
I guess the best thing to focus on is that now I have the information to prevent it from taking over my life like before. Also it has been very liberating to know I have no limitations (physically).
Thanks for the kind words RSR. I have enjoyed your posts as well. It sounds like your reduced reaction to your symptoms is exactly what is needed to allow them to resolve.
When I mention journalling that I have done when new symptoms show up, sometimes all it means is one session of writing about the problem at hand. It doesn't have to be weeks of writing. Sometimes it's a colorful letter to the person causing me pain.
I know it feels painful, but I think you'll find that putting the poison on paper actually makes you feel better. Of course if you are very concerned, maybe talking to someone professional or at least a trusted friend might be an option.
Best
Peg
In questions of science, the authority of a thousand is not worth the humble reasoning of a single individual. Galileo Galilei |
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mjwebb05
24 Posts |
Posted - 09/15/2008 : 17:18:01
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I am so glad that so many people are responding to this topic and resonating with it. Just the fact that I am not "alone" in this has helped in my recovery from this relapse!! Also, Peg, I think you are on to something when you said
"Sometimes I think the severity of the symptoms relates to the emotional issue at the time. Although the perpetuation seems to relate to our reaction to it."
I have also had times where something flared up and I knew right away what the cause was - being with my belligerent father for a long weekend and hearing him berate my mother, the first time i ran again, etc.
Now i think this time it has taken me a week to get started at the recovery process because, as I journaled, I was looking for things in my past, or really general "surfacy" things, when in reality what was going on that made my volcano of repressed emotions spill over was a deeper issue related to the fact that my husband and I have been trying to get pregnant for six months now with no luck. And this week was "go time" in terms of baby making, and to compound it, I definitely pulled a hip flexor a bit in a baby making position :) That caused me to worry about the old worries related to sex hurting my "back/hip issues" and led to seeds of doubt about my being able to handle a pulled muscle. All this compounded with the complex emotional pressure and stress I feel I am under every month we are not pregnant, I think cued this whole thing off.
I need to get to the core emotions involved in this, as I think I have just scratched the surface. I am feeling a bit better tonight, especially since reading these discussion threads, oddly enough. But I am going to need to do some big-time journaling and self-discovery, and then follow it up with a big "Let go, and Let God" over the whole pregnancy situation.
THanks for listening...
M |
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Peg
USA
284 Posts |
Posted - 09/15/2008 : 20:07:27
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"I have also had times where something flared up and I knew right away what the cause was - being with my belligerent father for a long weekend and hearing him berate my mother"
This must be very difficult for you. Does your Mom accept it? Did he treat you that way? Things to write about.
"the first time i ran again,"
This scares me as well. I've never really been a runner, but it's a goal of mine. At the age of 50, I feel intimidated. But, I keep reminding myself that if I could ride a bile 110 miles in a day last year, I will be able to run...eventually. I plan to start gradually.
"All this compounded with the complex emotional pressure and stress I feel I am under every month we are not pregnant, I think cued this whole thing off."
Bingo!! Sounds like you found your cause (IMO). "complex emotional pressure" is an accurate way to describe what you are going through. It's very stressful and complicated. You want so much to get pregnant, but at the same time the awesome responsibility ahead is frightening. Especially if one is a conscientious, TMS type.
It must be disappointing as well. I remember feeling desappointed after 3-4 months of trying. But then it happened.
All I would offer is that in my reading I have learned that stressing and worrying can affect fertility. So I think your plan of "letting go" is a good one. How many stories have we heard about the couple that tries and tries without success. They adopt a child (pressure's off) and then she gets pregnant!
Good luck
Peg
In questions of science, the authority of a thousand is not worth the humble reasoning of a single individual. Galileo Galilei |
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mjwebb05
24 Posts |
Posted - 09/19/2008 : 19:18:04
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| Update: Relapse - Gone!! :) |
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Peg
USA
284 Posts |
Posted - 09/19/2008 : 19:28:03
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AWESOME!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Peg
In questions of science, the authority of a thousand is not worth the humble reasoning of a single individual. Galileo Galilei |
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Relapse after six months
