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Tatianne
Canada
4 Posts |
 Posted - 02/18/2008 : 14:17:46
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Ive read some of the posts and what info i could find about TMS...
I think I might it might be me...
Im 32, daughter of an alcoholic mom, father was never around, felt like I had to raise my bro when my mom was drinking...she re married a man who wasnt very nice to me...mother has anxiety and brother has anxiety..
Ive always been a very nervous person, even as a child.
Never felt good enough in anything that I did and I still dont.
Ive had an anxiety problem for quite some time, I think since I was quite young but it seems that it really started after the birth of my first child. I have alwasy thought I would develop some horrible disease and die and not be here for my children.
I have thought Ive had all kinds of things, cancer, MS, heart problems etc...
Im now going through a lot of stress over the past years, Im a sinlge mom of three children, I was divorced about 3 years ago.
My ex is very hard on me and continues to make life difficult for me.
I was diagnosed with a Benign brain tumour, acoustic neuroma, its actually in the ear...but its still considered a brain tumour. This is under observation and will be treated in the near futur.
SO this had needeless to say caused me great anxiety. Ive been to the emergency and doctor several times with anxiety produced symptoms...
Ive had migraines since 9 years old.
Tension headaches.
Many UTIs....
A lot of muscle pain in my back (still happening)
(if you touch my back it hurts in several places)
Neck and shoulder pain, tngling pinky...
and now
the latest (which I have to say developed when I was waiting for annual test results about the ear thing, which was a very stressful time) is sciatic pain that has created tinlging feelings in my leg and foot...
Been to the doctor and they suspect bulging disk and have sent me to PT and thats not really working.
I keep thinking I have all kinds of things, especially another tumour. Ive made another appt with my GP but its not until March 3 rd..
Im going to order the books and read up on this but Im wondering if anyone would agree that I may have TMS ??
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sagelady
USA
61 Posts |
Posted - 02/19/2008 : 02:42:59
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Tatianne, Glad you found the site. I'm new here too. But I think you will find great comfort in reading the posts and learning about TMS.I hope others from the anxiety board take a look at TMS too.
Sage |
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mizlorinj
USA
490 Posts |
Posted - 02/19/2008 : 07:02:29
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Hi Tatianne. First of all, that is a beautiful name.
Your symptoms are typical of TMS. I can hear the fear in your posting, which is natural. How about exploring deep-seated things that bother you about life in general: everyday pressures, childhood carryovers? Do some writing about how you FEEL about those things, like the ones you mentioned in your posting. I call writing about this stuff my personal therapy.
Bulging disc. Well you can read my post on success stories about my herniated disc at L5S1 which was blamed by the docs for the horrible pain I had (diagnosed at first as sciatica). I HATED physical therapy and got to the point where I said I was no longer paying a $35 copay for torture. Didn't need PT anyway as it was not a physical issue. The disc was not to blame for the pain as I later learned since the pain went away as I wrote my hands off about everything I could think of. No surgery. No more p/t.
I'd suggest writing about your fears too. I remember waiting for test results or sitting in doc's office or xray, etc. and I would start to sweat with fear as the "what if's" went through my overthinking mind. I remember someone who looked at my MRI pictures (a respected friend who was an "expert" in spinal stuff) told me on the phone "you will need surgery" I felt a wave of heat pass over my body and I cried I was so scared. Well, he was wrong. Still adore him, but we don't see eye to eye on this stuff.
I am so happy to be 100% healed from TMS and I HEALED MYSELF with the eye-opening advice of Dr. Sarno. Fear is natural when we have pain. But most pain, I have learned, IS indeed brain-induced. I know we think we are the exception and there is really something wrong with us, like I did, but I wasn't an exception. Happy for that. But regarding the bulging disc, there are many stories of people who have that condition and have healed themselves of pain w/o surgery, etc. Back pain is quite the epidemic these days, and it is mostly stress-induced.
Best wishes to you on your journey to healing,
Lori |
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Dave
USA
1864 Posts |
Posted - 02/19/2008 : 10:43:12
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The encouraging part of your message is that you started right off discussing your upbringing and psychological factors.
Clearly you need to treat the tumor and rule out any possibility that it is responsible for any symptoms.
Nevertheless it sounds like you fit the profile of someone prone to TMS. I would suggest that you read Healing Back Pain or The Mindbody Connection and follow the treatment suggestions.
You are already way ahead of many who dwell on symptoms and cannot accept a psychological basis for physical symptoms. For example, your comment: "Never felt good enough in anything that I did and I still dont" is a classic personality trait in TMS-prone people. The fact that you have identified this so early in the learning process means that there is a good chance you will be successful in your healing. |
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Tatianne
Canada
4 Posts |
Posted - 02/19/2008 : 11:38:12
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thanks everyone...
Dave:
The tumour is in my inner ear canal, it does touch some nerves that are related to hearing, balance and facial function but it is actually no where near the brain so it cant be producing the back symptoms. Im presently under observation, and if it continues to grow will be treated by either surgery or radiation to stop the growth, if it doesnt grow it will be left alone. Apparently 5 out of every 100 people have this and never know it in their lifetime because it often doesnt produce symptoms and stays quite small.
I do dwell on my symptoms but I want to move past them. Ive been dweling on symptoms for far too long and I need to heal from the inside out. (I wonder is this acoustic neuroma could be connected to TMS ???)
The feet tingling and burning is making me crazy, at the same time I know that whatever is happening physically, no matter what it is has to be from the internal mess that I havent sorted out or cleaned up..the longer I leave it the more health problems I will develop..at the same time i find it difficult to really accept the belief that there isnt anything real medical illness occuring...
Thanks for your response.
Lori: I am filled with fear...I have so much fear that Im not living anymore, I feel like im just existing to keep life going...This is the worst feeling in the world. I will start to wrtie as you have suggested, I actually enjoy writting and I will make the time to do it.Thanks for sharing your story with me, its good to know that your have healed yourself, it definitly inspires me that I might be able to do the same.
Sage, i thank you so much for pointing me in this direction...
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Im new here, thinking I could have TMS
