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tootercat
USA
7 Posts |
 Posted - 12/01/2006 : 13:04:28
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I bought the video about 3 weeks ago and have yet to watch it. I was so excited after reading one of his books and was looking forward to getting better. I actually had some partial relief after the book and have seen how people have overcome some really incredible obstacles from coming on here. I have all the time in the world to watch and yet find myself putting it off. I feel stupid. I dream of being able to get with my life and I'm avoiding it. Fear of success? Fear of failure? Story of my life. Please tell me I am not alone and how you overcame it. Part of me feels like now that I have "confessed" I will go watch the tape. Why can't I just do it on my own without an audience or getting attention? I am certifiable....
=^..^= |
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h2oskier25
USA
395 Posts |
Posted - 12/01/2006 : 13:42:44
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Because . . . .
This has taken over YOUR LIFE. And you no longer had to make the tough decisions. Am I happy? Do I want to keep doing what I'm doing? What should I do with my life now that I have it back? Am I happy in this relationship?
Tell me these aren't scary questions. You want all the relief of being pain free without any of the responsibility for captaining your own ship. We've all been there.
Take heart, have courage. It really is a great trip.
Cheers,
Beth |
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tootercat
USA
7 Posts |
Posted - 12/01/2006 : 16:55:12
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Thanks Beth. Just to let you know....I over-rode my fear and watched the video. I guess I needed to say out loud that I was afraid. I keep hearing the phrase in my head: "We have nothing to fear but fear itself"
Am I correct in thinking that I need to read another of his books in conjuntion with the study guide? If so which one?
Thanks so much for your earlier response 
Pam
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Stryder
686 Posts |
Posted - 12/01/2006 : 23:47:57
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Fear of success? Fear of failure? Story of my life. Please tell me I am not alone and how you overcame it.
Hi Pam,
TMS is all about fear,,, and control (or lack of). Fear is the fav tool of TMS. TMS uses fear to control you, to provide the distraction to prevent harmful feelings from surfacing in your conscious mind. Sarno says that most of the time these feelings are caused by the pool-o-inner-rage. This is like a bank account of baggage that you need to deal with in order to get better. Some people recover by just understanding the mechanism of TMS. Others have to deal with the repressed emotional baggage in order to get better.
You have taken the first step, in that you have found the work of the good doctor. You are one of the lucky ones. Now you have the tools you need to beat this.
Take care, -Stryder
P.S. Hey Beth, there is a waitstaff over here with your drink order. |
Edited by - Stryder on 12/01/2006 23:50:25 |
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carbar
USA
227 Posts |
Posted - 12/01/2006 : 23:49:55
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I can absolutely relate to fear of failure. I think that was one repressed emotion that led to my developing TMS.
It's great that you watched the video. These things have to marinate, it takes time to come to terms with healing.
Saying it has a lot of power. I had this happen in my life today at work. I was feeling badly about how a coworker and I hadn't been communicating much or well lately. I talked it over with a friend at work, and suddenly all these possibilities to improve the situation came to light and I spoke with her with a positive outcome.
I'm proud to say I'm a year into healing from 7 years of TMS pain, but getting on with my life has definitely NOT happened in an instant. Actually, the knowledge of TMS has encouraged me to embrace the little steps along the way and stress less about the big picture. When I first started, just waking up with less and less pain felt like the biggest blessing anyone could receive, and it was tremendous to FEEL something so positive after dwelling with pain, fear and hopelessness for so long.
You are onto something here, tootercat, stick with it and show yourself love and understanding. Continue to look forward to feeling better, but allow yourself the time and energy to process, it's not an overnight thing.
As to the workbook question, I just journal in a freehand style and re-read Mindbody Perscription for a long while. Also, I find very useful and healing, the book Full Catastrophe Living, by Jon Kabat-Zinn.
Good luck and blessing to you!
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tennis tom
USA
4749 Posts |
Posted - 12/02/2006 : 00:29:51
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"These things have to marinate,"
Nice image Carbar and a nice post. |
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HilaryN
United Kingdom
879 Posts |
Posted - 12/02/2006 : 02:41:09
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Tootercat,
I have a lot of fear inside me so I can definitely relate. I’m glad to say I recovered completely from my RSI over a year ago (I took it slowly over a 6-month period), but I know that fear is still sitting inside me and I’m trying to tackle that slowly, because I don’t want other stuff coming up.
quote:
Why can't I just do it on my own without an audience or getting attention?
I know there are people who have done this on their own, but I’m certainly not one of them. Like you, I felt I should be able to, but I recognised that it wasn’t possible.
While the recovery can only come from you, not from someone else, I think other people can help you find your solution. Sometimes they don’t even have to say anything – just the fact of you talking about it and knowing someone else is listening can help you. As you said, “I guess I needed to say out loud that I was afraid.”
Hilary N |
Edited by - HilaryN on 12/02/2006 02:42:48 |
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tennis tom
USA
4749 Posts |
Posted - 12/02/2006 : 09:31:33
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quote:
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Why can't I just do it on my own without an audience or getting attention?
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Because we are social animals. |
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Wavy Soul
USA
779 Posts |
Posted - 12/03/2006 : 10:36:18
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There's a saying in 12-step something like this:
"Only I can do it, and I can't do it alone."
xx
Love is the answer, whatever the question |
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Kristin
98 Posts |
Posted - 12/03/2006 : 11:57:06
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quote:
Originally posted by tennis tom
quote:
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Why can't I just do it on my own without an audience or getting attention?
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Because we are social animals.
That is a very useful answer TT. I am taking it to heart. I also struggle with this because I fancy myself as a bit of a loner. "No one understands me. I would be happier living in a cabin alone in the mountains" When conflicts come up with people I try to resolve them but when failing I would rather just leave, and dread further interaction.
I have felt like it's wrong to want approval and aknowledgement, like it's selfish, egocentric and not really valuable. I want to pursue my creative side by making art, jewelry, some sort of concrete expression of who I am but I shy away from doing it because I don't want to be seen as wanting to get attention for something I've made. Deep down in my social soul I am craving some sort of recognition for validating my place in our culture/world. But perhaps a TMS like mechanism is distracting me from accomplishing this goal. Yeah, it's fear alright. |
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tootercat
USA
7 Posts |
Posted - 12/03/2006 : 13:10:28
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Sorry it has taken so long to get back and acknowledge all of the support I have gotten from this post. Thank you so much all of you. I have been (of course) trying to get results without doing the work since I watched the tape. I keep trying to tell myself that when I feel pain "it's not really there". Guess what...it hasn't worked.
I am having an internal temper tantrum today. I am full of resentment for being part of a 12 step program that I have attended for almost 17 years. (And without which I would probably be dead) I'm not really even sure anymore if I truly am an alcoholic but I am not willing to take the chance to find out by drinking. (yet) Based on the information given about TMS it seems that maybe drinking was just another way of keeping the repressed emotions at bay. If I were to say this to anyone at a meeting they'd probably tell me I need more meetings....
I would love to give my introspective mind a vacation. What's it like to feel without giving a rat's rear end what people think? (including me)
Okay enough. I have things to do that I am avoiding....
Toots
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Kristin
98 Posts |
Posted - 12/03/2006 : 13:35:31
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tootercat,
I have never taken part in a twelve step program but read somewhere something to the extent that there is something in that process that avoids dealing directly with the real issues behind addiction. I may have bookmarked that link long ago. This person's theory sounded more like a TMS approach to me.
I would never suggest that someone should quit a 12 step program. I think there are many ways to look at a problem. It's almost like your body was trying to release "toxins" after you purged your mind. If you can, accept, don't fight the feelings. |
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HilaryN
United Kingdom
879 Posts |
Posted - 12/03/2006 : 13:52:27
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quote:
I keep trying to tell myself that when I feel pain "it's not really there".
But the pain IS really there. The important thing is to recognise the cause - i.e. repressed emotions. Saying the pain has a psychological cause is NOT the same as saying the pain is "imaginary".
quote:
What's it like to feel without giving a rat's rear end what people think? (including me)
By that do you mean feelings which are regarded as socially unacceptable? Would it help to tell you that everyone has them, although many may deny it?
Hilary N |
Edited by - HilaryN on 12/03/2006 13:54:11 |
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Am I nuts or just afraid?
