MY name is Kajsa and I live in Denmark .I have been a member of this board for a long time but in the last six months I have not written much. I was diagnosed with fibromyalgia ten years ago and we all know thatīs severe tms.
I got rid of my pain after 1,5 year (after practising Sarno). It wasnīt a very quick process and I still have same pain from time to time. The big thing is: I do not fear it, it doesnīt bother me.
Itīs peanut. I do not obsesse over it. Of
course that would be impossible if the pain was bad -but it isnīt.
I do not think that itīs important for me to get rid of it to 100%.
The fatigue has been very much harder to get rid of and it has been devestating to my life but these last weeks I have had some success. I do not know if itīs going to last but I think so.
I discovered that I actually have to change my life and my view
of life. I HAVE to be more relaxed and not think gloomy thoughts all the time.
Not only the things Sarno says "be aware of the process". Itīs not good enough for me. It doesnīt break the bad fatigue.
I practice meditation and I work to relax my body and I work with my thoughts. I actually try to feel good/be more happy ! I guess it sounds silly but belive me I am NOT the kind of person who doesnīt want to look at the "dark sides of life" -quite the opposite. I have been in a (good) psychotherapy for six years and I always se complexity in life. That is good in many ways but itīs if I have been afraid to actually be happy as well! All the problems in the world are not mine ! I visualize in the mornings and I visualize myself happy (and it works quite well)
-and I also actually try hard to change things thatīs not god.
This sounds pollyanish, stupid (and perhaps even more stupid because my english is bad) and I have always hated those pink
books "today is the first day for the rest of your life" , "Think positive" etc And I still doesnt like those kind of books. Because I truly belive that you have a history, and that it matters and that yoy have to pentetrate the dark things in your life and also
feel the sorrow, grief etc.
But after that you also have to change , be responsible for your own life, try to have a good life. For me the TMS also has been a way to
"get away fråm lifes responsibilities" , actually escape .I hade to much emotional stuff to carry when I was a child and because of that I never really wanted to grow up.
For me this meditation, visualisation, "taking-responsibility of my life" etc has made a big different and the last weeks I finally got back some of my energy. I have had som really good days!
I mean -you can not have a life that is boring and lousy and be full of stress -and then expect to be healthy just because you read Sarno and belive in TMS.
At least thats my experience.
Kajsa
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Change your life
Posted - 09/26/2004 : 04:48:09
