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HilaryN
United Kingdom
879 Posts |
Posted - 03/30/2006 : 14:38:57
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Quotes from the following thread:
http://tmshelp.com/forum/topic.asp?TOPIC_ID=1922&whichpage=2
quote: (Indy) A client may feel better mentally and emotionally - and physically - from "doing" the journaling or TMS work, for example, but the energy of the emotion is still in the body if they don't give themselves permission to release it. This is the only part of Dr. Sarno's work that bothers me. When the brain realizes that you figured out the emotional source of your back pain, for example, it will say "OK, I can't create pain in the back/leg etc. anymore, so I'll create a subtle disease or grow a tumor that doesn't hurt but will distract her." The brain will find another way to distract your attention because the repressed diseased emotional energy is still there. And I firmly believe that is what Dr. Sarno calls "the physical equivalents".
quote: (miehnesor) You also bring up another point which is something that i've wondered for a long time. Sarno's healing program doesn't require feeling the emotion because for most folks they can presumably banish the symptoms using just the conscious mind. This is astonishing to me but it must be true since Sarno's work is just an observation of reality. However I wonder whether the brain just resorts to some other form of distraction since the underlying emotion is still there and the energy of it has not been dissipated. Seems like in some cases a different distraction takes hold and in others it doesn't.
I, too, don’t feel happy with the idea that one doesn’t have to identify / release the repressed emotions which cause the pain. (Miehnesor I bought Dr Janov’s book “The New Primal Scream” and am part way through it. Very interesting.)
I’m not one for journaling, but occasionally I do note something down in my diary. Here’s an entry from a few months back:
After a weekend of gardening, so I felt physically tired, this evening I decided to spend some time with my emotions. I had a sort of internal dialogue with them. (I felt, by the way, that being physically weary was a good state to receive my emotions, because my resistance to them would be lower.)
Dialogue:
Me: OK folks, you can come out now. I'd like you to feel that you can come out and that you will feel safe in doing so. I know you've been pushed down, and I made you a promise that I'll stop doing that.
Emotions (stirring timidly, peeking out cautiously): Are you sure about that?
Me: Well, to be quite honest, no, I don't feel quite comfortable with you. But I know it's important to let you out because otherwise I may suffer physical consequences, and I don't want that.
Emotions: So you're not prepared to welcome as for our own sakes. You're just using us as a means to an end.
Me: Hmm, yes. I guess so. I see your point.
Emotions: We want to be recognised and welcomed in our own right. Not as a subordinate to the physical.
Me: I see. Yes, I recognise that. I'll be honest and say that I still feel uncomfortable with emotions, but I'll do my best to recognise you for what you are. I understand what you're saying, and it's made me realise that I need to love and accept you. Pushing you down is definitely not good. "Tolerating" you is also not good enough. I need to welcome you with open arms and accept that you're a part of me.
Emotions: Yes. We understand that you're uncomfortable because you're still not used to this idea, but if you accept it and are prepared to try and welcome us then we will be happier about coming out.
Hilary N |
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Tunza
New Zealand
198 Posts |
Posted - 03/30/2006 : 16:10:05
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I really like your internal dialogue Hilary! I can even see the timid emotions in my mind's eye when you put it like that. It's a less threatening way of seeing them.
It reminds me of my fear of spiders. Instead of spraying them from as far away as possible I'm concentrating on "rescuing them in a jar". Being close to them physically repluses me but if I let myself feel sorry for them I can cope better. I am starting with the smallest ones though as it's such a big fear. Working so far. |
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optimism
44 Posts |
Posted - 03/31/2006 : 09:13:37
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I would like to know the answer on those questions as well.
I am also kind of confused if I need to feel the emotions or just realize they are there.
For example I can instead of focusing on pain say to myself: 1. "I realize I am under a lot of stress at work lately" or, 2. "I realize I am under a lot of stress at work lately and feel unprecciated, unhappy, tired, used, angry etc"
Which of these two is true according to Sarno?? |
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miehnesor
USA
430 Posts |
Posted - 03/31/2006 : 10:38:11
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Hilary- Thx for sharing your inner child dialog with us. Your dialog has hit on the key issues wrt this work- building a relationship of love and trust between the parent and the child that lives inside of each of us. It takes time for this trust to grow because as your post points out the emotions will not come out unless the bond between parent and child is strong and the child(emotions) feels safe enough to venture out of hiding.
If you are interested in this stuff, which seems like you are, I highly recommend the book "Healing your aloneness- finding love and wholeness through your inner child" by Chopich and Paul. |
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Dave
USA
1864 Posts |
Posted - 04/01/2006 : 07:16:16
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quote: Originally posted by optimism
For example I can instead of focusing on pain say to myself: 1. "I realize I am under a lot of stress at work lately" or, 2. "I realize I am under a lot of stress at work lately and feel unprecciated, unhappy, tired, used, angry etc"
Which of these two is true according to Sarno??
#1 is pretty useless. #2 is on the right track. But take it further and be specific. "I hate my boss because he didn't give me the praise I deserved for working overtime on that big project and then he took the credit and made me look like an idiot." Then punch a pillow and make believe it is your boss.
You cannot force yourself to feel repressed emotions. But you can do your best to feel present emotions as they occur and take that feeling as far as you can. If you are lucky you will open an "escape valve" that will lead your mind to feeling deeper, more repressed feelings. Anger on the surface often covers up deeper feelings that your mind is afraid or ashamed to let you feel. |
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n/a
560 Posts |
Posted - 04/01/2006 : 14:04:32
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All of these questions, every single one of them, are answered in Dr. Sarno's new book!!!!!!! |
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HilaryN
United Kingdom
879 Posts |
Posted - 04/09/2006 : 16:15:55
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Sorry for the late reply - I've been very busy.
Tunza, good luck with the cute little furry things
Miehnesor, thank you for your post - I hadn't realised that was what "inner child" was. Thanks for the book recommendation - I'll add it to my list. ("The Divided Self" is next, I think. I'd better order it before my next long plane journey.)
Hilary N |
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johnnyg
USA
138 Posts |
Posted - 05/13/2006 : 13:35:03
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ok, i just got back to the board and am responding like a mad person. Peter is right on this one--the answer is in the new book. It has become clear to me that feeling all present emotions is essential to avoid suppression, which will reduce additions to the resevoir of rage. Repression is essentially impossible to avoid because it happens in the unconscious. So it seems to me the real question left unanswered is, do we have to do anything about large amounts of repressed rage after we have accepted the TMS diagnosis and largely defeated our main TMS problem? My answer is yes for many people (if not most).
In one of the later chapters of "Divided Mind", one of the doctors (forget which) talked about the fact that TMS therapy is scary for many people because it forces them to live a "geniune" emotional life. After surpassing the 1 year mark of TMS therapy, I now know that for myself, just knowing the emotions are there is not quite enough.
Releasing unconscious emotions is different from avoiding supression. A large reservoir of repressed anger causes a negative energy build up in a certain region of the brain. For some reason, Sarno will not touch on this--probably because he is not a phychiatrist or brain expert, and such people's problems are bordering into mental and no longer really physical (remember that TMS is physical disorder with a psychological cause, and he is a physician).
Releasing repressed emotions requires either a psychotherapist or a safe way let out the energy. My belief is that the remaining reservoir of anger that exists after you have beaten the bulk of the TMS symptonm is the cause of all remaining tension, anxiety and depression, and will eventually result in a new TMS manifestation if you don't solve the problem. That is why Sarno's advice is to seek psychotherapy--at that point he feels he is out of his league.
One other think I believe is that if you are at the point where you are learning how to feel emotion again, you are probably beyond looking at past relationships (childhood, mother, etc.) and on the road to true recovery. Forget about blaming other people or exploring childhood issue--GET OVER IT PLEASE!!!! At this point it is all up to you and what you make out of it---noone else cares if you succeed or fail. What I intend to do from this point on is get involveD in as many physical activites as I can while attempting to create as many positive experiences in my life as possible. |
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Monte
USA
125 Posts |
Posted - 05/14/2006 : 15:07:37
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this is the most challenging part of this disorder. one of the biggest prob. is that most really don't understand what feeling emotions/energy takes.
i beleive that you must experience/feel/release this emotional energy in order to transform the pain (stuck/blocked enrgy) into free/open/natural moving energy (no pain).
because this process is invisible and not always automatic it takes faith, trust and belief that by doing/being this process you are transforming the pain strategy (this is the bigges stumbling block for most) we want tangible results immidiately or our thts go into doubt/fear and we do not give this process a chance to work and going searching for a "new" doc/treatment/book/exercise...--all of these things then just feed the pain disorder and now you are really stuck--in the circular cycle of feeding the pain strategy.
so---here is a pretty easy example that you can use for feeling/experiencing the energy of (anger, resentment, jealousy, guilt, any emotion/feeling)....i will use anger because it is easiest to identify with for most of us, however, realize that the process is the same for any emotion...
1)the first step is you must identfy your repression activity....if you are wanting to experience anger you must realize that (raising your voice, slamming doors, clamming up and shutting down) are all Repression Activities that keep you from feeling/experiencing this energy....so next time you feel a anger incident coming on, remind yourself that you are going to challenge the repression actiivty (raising your voice or shutting down) by Not doing that...If you normally go into outburst mode--You now do not do that and you stay present in the moment and experience what happens when you do not go into outburst mode---this is how you experience the energy of anger. and it is not going to be some big Wow feeling...And that is a Key point to realize...
What you just accomplished though is instead of repressing anger/energy with an outburst you stayed present and you allowed this energy to move and be free and open--which is what it naturally does when we don't repress it.... This is the process that changes the biochemistry inside your body--it tranforms it from pain to no-pain.
Now you have to beleive it, trust the process and persistently work at it! Without striving, grasping and trying to be perfect about it...And then it Works --Perfectly and naturally.
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lobstershack
Australia
250 Posts |
Posted - 05/15/2006 : 06:17:00
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"it is not going to be some big wow feeling"
I think this point is key. Oftentimes I find myself afraid of digging or experiencing because I think it will result in theatrical histerics; uncontrolable wailing or rage or sadness.
Seth |
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art
1903 Posts |
Posted - 05/15/2006 : 07:16:46
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I'm a middle-aged guy, probably hopelessly repressed, and at this point in my life willing to let sleeping emotional dogs lie. If they're not bothering me,I don't see why I should bother them...
My TMS has improved greatly simply by virute of understanding the illness...That's all it's taken..I know some aren't as fortunate as I've been and that in some cases more digging is required..
It's also possible I'd be doing even better if I went the psychodynamic route...Therapy, journaling, the whole thing... |
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