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Stryder
686 Posts |
 Posted - 02/04/2006 : 14:12:10
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quote:
Originally posted by Curiosity18
When I asked the instructor how to know if you're only repressing the feelings, he looked at me is if I were from Mars, and answered "because the process is complete! It works!
Interesting. With he TMS-prone personality, I can see how the process has merit but is really never complete. When you reach the last step and recall that the arrow has already been pulled out, that's when the circular obsession usually kicks in. As Baseball65 would say, that's the point where you have to "Let go". So I guess if we can let go then the forgiveness would be complete.
I can also see where you could forgive and let go, but then un-let-go later when the emotions resurface.
The "from Mars" look is typical in discussions with non-TMSers.
-Stryder |
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Curiosity18
USA
141 Posts |
Posted - 02/04/2006 : 17:58:33
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Stryder,
After reading your post I phoned the Buddhist monk who taught the workshop on forgiveness. Again, I asked him about resurfacing anger that continues toward a person, even after doing the "forgiveness process." He said that eventually your mind will "get" that you're over it and will truly let it go. He also said that it takes patience with yourself and that it may take many, many times of reminding yourself that you have pulled the arrow out of the relationship before your mind is convinced, and that you will "just know" when it has happened.
I know this seems so not-TMS, and I'm still reflecting on it myself.
Then again, who am I argue with 2500 years of success?!
Curiosity
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yowire
USA
70 Posts |
Posted - 02/04/2006 : 19:30:02
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From Scottydog:
quote:
You're not born feeling worthless
This may be true, but I think it could start shortly thereafter. One of the first things we experience is that we're kind of stinky and dirty and we need to be cleaned up alot, usually by someone who probably has a sour face due to our filth and odor. This may be accompanied by a grunt or two especially if the father is involved. Then we learn that we are pretty much helpless and totally dependent on others. At some point we discover that our self expressions are almost always met with disapproval, usually with words like "stop that" "NO" or "SSHHHH". And, just like the Rolling Stones, we learn that we can't always get what we want. (no matter how much we scream and cry) But if we try some time, do we find that we get what we need? Probably not, from our very young perspective.
As a baby, we probably don't think much about these things consciously. But, is it possible that unconsciously, these kinds of experiences and others might promote repressed feelings of inadequacy and low self worth very early?
I think it is possible.
While I was composing this post, Peter posted a very interesting article under the heading "article on child rearing" which also illustrates some of these thoughts.
Yowire
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Acceptance and surrender
