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jilly_girl
USA
108 Posts |
 Posted - 11/03/2005 : 14:53:33
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Hi. I'm new here. I'm a 47 year old with a history of weird stuff. I had years of bladder pain (undiagnosed despite many doctors). After a hysterectomy 2 years ago (yes i did need it, my uterus was falling out!) i developed numbness in my left leg. Then it began to hurt, especially when i sit. I was put on a med for nerve pain, Neurontin. It helped the leg, but now my butt hurts, especially around my rectum (sorry for THAT detail lol). I've had a history of weird pains: severe headache (CT scan was OK), chest pains (visit to cardiologist, all was ok), the pelvic pain etc etc etc. I just read the Mind/Body Prescription. It makes sense. My stress is through the roof. I am ending a 26 year painful marriage, my mom is dying, my adult kid is lazy and unemployed....and i hurt. I do wonder though, HOW do you know for sure that its tension causing the pain when it "moves" around? I could run endlessly to doctors (and i have!) and the pain would simply move. I forgot to add the panic attack/agorophobia part, which led me to ERs, ear/nose/throat docs, etc. It caused chest pain, when that was ruled harmless, it turned into dizziness. THIS is better, now...my butt hurts. I cant sit to work just at the time when i desperately need to due to the divorce (i have been a stay at home mom for years). Is my body "not letting me sit" so to speak so i can avoid divorcing him for financial reasons" . Hope this makese sense. Thanks for any ideas.
Jill |
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windy
USA
84 Posts |
Posted - 11/03/2005 : 18:59:11
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| If the pain is jumping around that much, it's definitely TMS. |
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altherunner
Canada
511 Posts |
Posted - 11/03/2005 : 20:25:41
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| I also had pain moving around, mostly from my back to neck, and that is what convinced me it was tms. I remember Dr.Sarno had a list of the most stressful things that can occur to a person, and divorce, and a death in the family were at the top. |
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wrldtrv
666 Posts |
Posted - 11/03/2005 : 22:03:22
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| Read my posts under "MS-like symptoms". I have had symptoms move from place to place by the day (and hour). |
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jilly_girl
USA
108 Posts |
Posted - 11/04/2005 : 04:55:22
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thanks to all who responded to my post. just 2 months ago i spent a fortune at a cardiologist (including an overnight stay in the cardiac unit!) ....i had a nuclear stress test, all normal results. now my ass hurts???!!! if the symptoms were in any way similiar, i would think TMS. but from the chest to the butt?? lol.....its a real problem since i am unable to sit and i am a secretary! so i cant work now, when i MOST need to. i do honestly feel that my problems are tension related though. I just dont know how to get it to "calm down". I took Vicodin last night, the pain went away all right and i woke up sick as a dog. i dont react well to vicodin and i know that, i am just so tired of something hurting. let me add my mom (who is seriously ill and most likely wont last much longer)...had a history of similiar issues....pain that couldnt be diagnosed. thanks again all.
Jill |
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n/a
560 Posts |
Posted - 11/04/2005 : 06:41:22
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Jill,
You stated: "I do wonder though, HOW do you know for sure that its tension causing the pain when it "moves" around?"
As others have said, and Dr. Sarno himself has observed, when the pain moves around like that this is a clear sign of TMS and not a sign of injury or a "structural abnormality" in the body. Dr. Sarno also notes that those who begin TMS treatment will find their pain moving around a lot. I guess the big mental block that most people have is the belief that pain = injury. It is hard for people to wrap their minds around the idea that inner tension could cause so much physical pain.
Remember, the emotions you are consciously aware off are not what is causing you the pain. It is those emotions buried deep within you that are threatening to come to the surface that are the source of your problem. The pain is there to keep you distracted from your inner emotions and inner tension.
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jilly_girl
USA
108 Posts |
Posted - 11/04/2005 : 08:00:38
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[Remember, the emotions you are consciously aware off are not what is causing you the pain. It is those emotions buried deep within you that are threatening to come to the surface that are the source of your problem. The pain is there to keep you distracted from your inner emotions and inner tension.
[/quote]
Hi Peter, thanks for replying. Ok, say i believe the above statement. I become aware of the inner turmoil (in my case i even know the source of my inner turmoil.....a dying mother and a marriage falling apart).......i am now aware of it. why does it still hurt? thanks! i appreciate any ideas or input.
Jill |
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miehnesor
USA
430 Posts |
Posted - 11/04/2005 : 11:08:37
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quote:
(in my case i even know the source of my inner turmoil.....a dying mother and a marriage falling apart).......i am now aware of it. why does it still hurt? thanks! i appreciate any ideas or input.
Jill
Jill- being aware of it is the first step but is often insufficient to reduce symptoms. Are you writing about it and even feeling about it? Remember TMS is not about being in your head its about being in your feelings and you need to get in contact with those feelings. Journaling is a great way to sort out the confusing emotions and get to the feelings. Also focus on the anger and feeling the anger.
I've just read the recommended book "Facing the Fire" by John Lee. It's the best book on anger that i've read. |
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n/a
374 Posts |
Posted - 11/04/2005 : 11:34:41
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Hi Jill
You are dealing with so much at the moment - stress overload; it's little wonder that you are in pain.
When you first read any of Dr Sarno's books and realise that what he describes fits you, it's natural to want the pain to just go away. I know that's how I felt. After all, I was a dyed-in-the-wool example of the syndrome, so why didn't the pain disappear? Most of us who post here don't fit into the catagory he outlines in his books - those people who find their pain goes with the knowledge that it is psychologically induced.
I tend to think that if a person comes to realise what is going on early, whether by accident or design, then perhaps it is easier to cure, but if you have been a sufferer for years and years (like you, me and loads of us here); that is a heck of a lot of conditioning to overcome.
I wish I could tell you that I found a short cut to recovery, but I can't- de-conditioning took a long time. It was a gradual process. Take heart though, once recovery began, I was never as bad again. I had set backs along the way, but that's all they were.
Best wishes
Anne
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jilly_girl
USA
108 Posts |
Posted - 11/04/2005 : 12:31:46
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you are all so kind to to reply to my posts i've learned very well to stuff my feelings down over the years, in order to keep my marriage together for the kids...that was a mistake. They were hurt worse than if i had left years ago. I am the family scapegoat, and everything is my fault. This particular pain comes up JUST when i need to return to work because i finally decide to end the abuse. It keeps me feeling "safe" i guess, in the familiar family pattern....but angry. I cant work, i cant leave...my body is tricking me........Even if you forgive (which i do) it still makes you mad. thanks again, you are giving me much to think about.
Jill |
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n/a
560 Posts |
Posted - 11/04/2005 : 12:45:08
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I am sorry to hear about your dear mom and the problems with your marriage.
I don't have all the answers as I too am struggling daily. I will provide only my limited understanding.
As intense as your pain is on the surface, there is another level of consciousness where another set of emotions and reactions are taking place. For example, you may be a very dependent person without being aware of it and your ailing mother and breakdown of your marriage may possibly create fear, anger or anxiety as the source of your dependence breaks down. Try to think along these lines that you have a surface emotions, but there is another whole world of emotions deep within you that are also very active. They can be very painful and even embarassing and over the years you may have unknowingly repressed them. Many of your action and drives are in responce to those inner feelings. Over time the strategies you used to repress your emotions no longer work and they threaten to surface into consciousness. This is when the pain kicks in to keep you distracted. Anything to keep you from thinking about your inner emotions and tension.
Remember, the pain is actually there to protect you, as strange as that sounds. Those inner feelings, as I stated, are embrassing and painful and a strategy has been put in place to keep you thinking about anything other than what is taking place deep within you. |
Edited by - n/a on 11/04/2005 12:47:09 |
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jilly_girl
USA
108 Posts |
Posted - 11/05/2005 : 11:31:14
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hi again..it seems like since i read the book, over the last few days, my pain has increased terribly. is this common? is becoming aware of whats actually going on making my body kick into high gear, so to speak, with the pain issue to distract from the real issue? thanks again
Jill |
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n/a
560 Posts |
Posted - 11/05/2005 : 15:03:50
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Yes Jill this is common. You are exposing the culprit and it is fighting back. The pain will also move around when you begin TMS treatment. It is a battle of wills - you against your brain. When you think about your pain then your brain is winning but when you think about the real source of your pain - inner tension- then you have the upper hand. Keep at it!!!!!!!
I highly recommend you Review the daily reminders found in Dr. Sarno's Healing Back Pain. See below:
(Source: Sarno, John E. "Healing Back Pain" - Page 82)
"This is an important strategy but one must be careful that is does not become a ritual. Patients are given a list of twelve key thoughts, and it is suggested that at least once a day they set aside fifteen minutes or so when they can relax and quietly review them. The are called the daily reminders."
-The pain is due to TMS, not a structural abnormality
-The direct reason for the pain is mild oxygen deprivation
-TMS is a harmless condition, caused by my repressed emotions
-The principal emotion is my repressed anger
-TMS exists only to distract my attention from the emotions
-Since my back is basically normal there is nothing to fear
-Therefore, physical activity is not dangerous
-And I must resume all normal physical activity
-I will not be concerned or intimidated by the pain
-I will shift my attention from the pain to emotional issues
-I intend to be in control - not my unconscious mind
-I must think psychological at all times, not physical
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Jim1999
USA
210 Posts |
Posted - 11/05/2005 : 22:29:57
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quote:
Originally posted by jilly_girl
I become aware of the inner turmoil (in my case i even know the source of my inner turmoil.....a dying mother and a marriage falling apart).......i am now aware of it. why does it still hurt?
Jill,
Just because you are aware of what's going on in general doesn't mean you understand the specifics. Dr. Sarno says that his patients need to think through their emotional issues in detail. Journaling helped me to do that. I know that I had to think through the details of many issues in order to recover.
I hope you will be able to make good progress on your TMS soon. I'm really sorry to hear about your marriage and your mother.
Keep us posted about how you are doing.
Jim
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jilly_girl
USA
108 Posts |
Posted - 11/07/2005 : 06:21:20
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thanks so much for all of your ideas and input. yesterday i accidentally spilled some juice on the kitchen floor. my husband and adult daughter just sat there and laughed, without offering to help clean up. i became utterly enraged, then very very depressed. i feel as if my family doesnt give a rip about me. i also feel i am on the right road as to whats causing my pain. thank you all!!
Jill |
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symptoms change
