| T O P I C R E V I E W |
| susan828 |
Posted - 11/20/2013 : 19:06:54
Some of you may remember me. I haven't posted since June. I complained about stomach pains, attributed them to TMS which I certainly have had all of my life. So, I had a colonoscopy and it was fine. Next step was the gynecologist who sent me for a transvaginal sonogram and cat/pet scan. Loads of malignant masses that had spread, stage 3C. Had a hysterectomy and now in chemo. Not a good prognosis.
I am writing this to tell people, please don't ask is this TMS and not get it checked out. Not everything is TMS, even if you argue that I got cancer from stress…the bottom line is that this one cannot just go away by itself and needs to be treated.
I could beat myself up for spending years on the Irritable Bowel Board and not going to see a gyn. Ovarian cancer is considered the silent disease because it doesn't cause many symptoms until it reaches stage 3 and 4. If you are a woman reading this, get the CA-125 test and a transvaginal sonogram once a year. That's the only way to catch it at a much more curable rate.
I see some posts here that are disturbing, urinary tract infections that can go to the kidney and worse. Does it matter if it's TMS caused? Stuff needs to be treated! I have been helped immensely by Sarno and Steve's book but there is a place you have to realize that a cigar is just a cigar and go to the doctor. I waited too long, I couldn't even walk or sit in june, I was in so much pain. I was a dummy. i hope you understand what I am trying to say which is don't rely on checking up on something because you think by practicing TMS techniques, it will disappear. My life as i knew it is now over because i let it go on too long. |
| 20 L A T E S T R E P L I E S (Newest First) |
| filipe |
Posted - 06/02/2015 : 07:42:22
quote:
Originally posted by filipe
[quote]Originally posted by susan828
But if you attribute cancer to stress, how do you explain children's cancer, children who were really happy with well adjusted parents, etc.?
It is somwhow funny that say that. Are you saying that children don't have stress? Is that what you are saying?
When I was a boy I was petrified about the idea of having an incurable disease. I was happy and with well adjusted parents, I guess. Anyway, I thoght I was very very sick. I never mentioned this to my parents, I always kept this to my self, and suffered in silence, because I was affraid that if they new, that they might not loved me anymore, and maybe abandon me. This is how irrational, we all are, when we are children. I also remember, being so affraid of having a heart attack, or cancer. Why? Because people are always talking about these "dreadfull" deseases on TV. This stuff affects our unconcious mind.
On the other hand, it is very difficult for Children to release their fears, and repressed emotions. It takes a certain kind of maturity to do it. Even for adults it is difficult.
When River Phoenxi died of an heart attack. They didn't mentioned in the beggining drugs. For several weeks I remembre waiking up in the middle of the night in panic, about the same happening to me... |
| filipe |
Posted - 06/02/2015 : 07:33:50
quote:
Originally posted by susan828
But if you attribute cancer to stress, how do you explain children's cancer, children who were really happy with well adjusted parents, etc.?
It is somwhow funny that say that. Are you saying that children don't have stress? Is that what you are saying?
When I was a boy I was petrified about the idea of having an incurable disease. I was happy and with well adjusted parents, I guess. Anyway, I thoght I was very very sick. I never mentioned this to my parents, I always kept this to my self, and suffered in silence, because I was affraid that if they new, that they might not loved me anymore, and maybe abandon me. This is how ireational, we all are, when we are children. I also remember, being so affraid of having a heart attack, or cancer. Why? Because people are always talking about this "dreadfull" deseases on TV.
On the other hand, it is very difficult for Children to release their fears, and repressed emotions. It takes a certain kind of maturity to do it. Even for adults it is difficult. So I really don't understand what you were trying to say...
|
| andy64tms |
Posted - 12/05/2013 : 12:56:59
Hi Susan,
I am so glad your tests came back OK, and your last chemo is over, you can heave a sigh of relief as these points of anxiety are somewhat diminished. My dear sister in law is also at a turning point with her cancer as she is now at home, so I think about you also when I imagine the pains and discomfort and fear that she is going through. I posted a thread about her a while back. She is amazing, as she has acceptance of her condition and is very reluctant with giving the details.
Eric is right on with his wonderful post. It is time for you to believe in yourself and put your cancer in the background. May you find joy and happiness in your life once again, after all, this is what we are here for. That cheerful side of yourself that you mentioned in one of your past posts is who you really are!
Andy
Past TMS Experience in 2000, with success.
Charlie Horse on neck for 20 years, is almost gone.
Books:
Healing Back Pain
Unlearn your Pain
The Great Pain Deception |
| Busted |
Posted - 12/03/2013 : 16:20:56
So happy to hear that Susan! And the fact that you had a hysterectomy should cut down your chances of getting random breast cancer as well. But check with your doc on that. |
| susan828 |
Posted - 12/03/2013 : 14:02:48
Gosh, you all are so kind. eric, thank you for the encouraging post and same to everyone else who took the time to write something.
To Busted, I am BRCA negative. I am so relieved. As you know, this doesn't mean I can't get breast cancer but the chances are lower. You and everyone else here knows what it's like waiting for a test result. The worst anxiety.
My last chemo is tomorrow (for now anyway pending cat scan which is the final word in a month). Then the difficulty first begins in a sense, resuming life, getting physical strength back and focusing on how to make life more stress free and enjoying it knowing that cancer now is a shadow that will never go away.
For someone who is hypochondriacal as I am, all the "what if this pain is really from something bad", for it to finally have been real has just been so hard. I will still be on this board and will surely give an update after the scan in January. I still have TMS, regardless of the cancer and am very grateful for this forum. |
| Busted |
Posted - 12/02/2013 : 20:39:03
Susan, I will keep you in my thoughts and hope that your BRCA results come back negative. Thank you for saying I am brave, that means a lot to me, although honestly I had the surgery out of fear more than anything else. I know that ovarian cancer is horrific and I am so sorry you have to go through this, but you are brave too, and you will beat it! We are all rooting for you! |
| RageSootheRatio |
Posted - 12/02/2013 : 08:11:28
THANK YOU, Eric, yes a beautiful post as chickenbone noted.
Cancer or TMS, it is helpful to be reminded of the power of acceptance and hope and love.
~RSR |
| chickenbone |
Posted - 12/02/2013 : 08:01:49
Beautiful post by Eric, as always. Susan and Eric, I wish you both all the best. You both can do it!! |
| eric watson |
Posted - 12/02/2013 : 07:37:32
Susan some things we cant explain, like the children with cancer. Isn't that so wrong,I know you're weak and have been through a lot but I have noticed you mention how your life was over and you're afraid. You should have some normal reaction to what you've found out for a little bit but you know the only way to heal is to start thinking of living again dear.
I believe everyone here is crying in there heart for you cause we draw close on these boards and we often think a lot of each other. I think you've done well with your tms studies and I don't think you should be mad at yourself. Of course that's a natural reaction too for a while but come back to the living because you are still with us and that means you can win this battle.
How ever you decide to fight this battle , remember you have to love yourself with this cancer and all - not ignoring your situation at all but as you know by now getting mad at this situation hasn't helped yet has it dear.
I've coached many people with cancer and I know a big factor in the equation was for the person to learn to live life with love and self compassion not fearing anything and always thinking in the now focused on life.
We can look at Norman cousins as you've mentions that you have read his books and I know that's something hed say. Never believe your not good to heal. Never loose your self compassion and in time get your hope back with plenty of laughter, you should be fine.
Think this way till its the only way you think and if you cant do it soon then practice till you can and don't get mad if your not that good at it just don't stop living cause of cancer.
Smile on the way to get chemo, ( it seems impossible but its not) see yourself happy and healed in your minds eye. Never doubt the power of life that can change this cancer to nothing in time.
I wondered why some people with cancer and other body ailments didn't just heal after our bodies were completely re-newed in a year ya know and in john kehoes book he sited that folks look at what they are and they think that's the way it is and it wont change so the signals that renew the body each year are just sending more signals of their ailments back to thus creating the same symptom over and over again.
So start seeing yourself cancer free and laugh more, be happy on purpose and believe itll all be well, don't fight in an angered way. Fight the good fight of faith with love and hope, acceptance too that you can do all things.
We are very powerful beings and if you believe you can rid this issue with cancer you will.I believe you already know what to do you're just getting over the shock. Be strong and stand up to this bully cancer as you are already doing.
Yes, I've had cancer on my shoulder. Didn't say anything about it cause some things are better left un- said. I knew that if I could get my mind on living and move in that direction then id be fine. I was still scared in a way - isn't it obvious that we get scared but you can still live life to the full and you'll heal.
Don't think about the 70 or 80 percent that have recurrences think about the 20 or 30 percent that don't have recurrences. You can win and I believe your super in the way your going about getting things done.
Remember TMS is a lifestyle that's created by tension, strain and stress - worry. Need I say more, The opposite of that is the cure to tms and its about tension reduction and loving self any way you look at it.
I believe the baby question you had sums up that even if you had no pressures in life that with the environmental issues and even the air we breathe its still possible to contract cancer in a fashion other than stress.
Its not about if its right that this person said the right thing or not, its about Susan now. Being sure that all things will be well even in the midst of doubt and hurt. If you keep your smile long enough and grab ahold of hope you should do fine. Believe my dear, believe.
The cancer on my shoulder is almost gone and if it wants to grow any then ill keep smiling because I know that smile is my power. In a little over a year now I have seen it grow when I worried and I have seen it fade almost to nothing when I just accepted it and even held love for that part of my shoulder cause I believe love is what it needs and now this morning I can barely see a thing.
Ill have more up- dates soon when I go back to the DR. but mine is on the skin and I could have had it cut off awhile back but I decided not too.
In your case dear I know why you do what your doing with the chemo, its a knowing in your heart. We know that self compassion and hope will go a long way.
Also never forget the power in forgiveness and visualizing yourself full of health totally healed.
there's many ways to battle cancer and the strongest by far is acceptance , forgiveness, gratitude , and a will to win.
You will win, always smile and love with all your heart.
|
| susan828 |
Posted - 12/01/2013 : 22:48:59
To Busted: I am getting my BRCA results this week and am scared stiff. You were wise and brave to get the hysterectomy. I'm sure you know the odds of getting both cancers when you're BRCA 1 or 2. You know what it's like to hear the words "It's cancer". I don't think anyone can know unless they've gone through that, or something else that's life threatening. It changed my whole perspective. Going from diagnosis day to hysterectomy to chemo all within 3 weeks, it's just unbelievably stressful and physically painful, I don't know how I am keeping it together. I wish you the best and I understand how you feel about the stress. In my case, recurrences are the norm and I have to try to reduce stress and change my diet in the hope that I can live out my life with no recurrences. I always thought it's the other person, not me. Rude awakening. |
| susan828 |
Posted - 12/01/2013 : 22:39:40
Hi folks, I am sorry for not posting for a few days. I have been so preoccupied with chemo and the stress of this disease that I forgot about the board. I am not distressed to read the comments as a few people mentioned. I was hoping that Steve would answer my question about why children get cancer if he thinks it's stress related. Children who did not seem stressed.
I will never know why cancer began in me. Nobody really knows what causes it despite zillions of theories. Yes, I was stressed but we all are. I was on this board way before the cancer became apparent to me. I know I had TMS but at the age of 10, they said I had a nervous stomach. Now they call it irritable bowel syndrome, same thing, but I know it was brought on by anxiety. Everything in Sarno's books resonates with me.
I started the thread because I am angry at myself for attributing my stomach pains to TMS. I don't want this to happen to others and feel that many of us wait too long. I wish I would have caught this in stage 2. Stage 1 is pretty symptomless but stage 2 would have a better prognosis than mine, 3C, meaning it spread to, but not into adjacent organs…which would have been stage 4.
When my chemo is over, the hard part will begin because I have to return to my life as it was and it wasn't great. I will most likely see a therapist and probably a TMS therapist if I can find one that takes my insurance. Thanks to everyone for your kind words. |
| njoy |
Posted - 12/01/2013 : 17:51:24
Wow, some thread. I've just read the whole thing and haven't got a clue what the argument is about. So what if we think a bit differently? If we didn't why would we bother talking to each other?
I do know that when someone else's behavior upsets me it's because I am getting close to learning something about myself. My upset is not with the other person much as I'd like to think it is.
In short, it seems to me that arguing about tms doctrine is a tms equivalent.
Currently on about IFS (Internal Family Systems). More info here: http://personal-growth-programs.com/learn-about-ifs/introduction-to-internal-family-systems-therapy/
----------
Proud member of tmshelp.com since 2005.
|
| tennis tom |
Posted - 12/01/2013 : 16:21:28
quote:
Originally posted by chickenbone
Tom, I am well aware of your anger management problems and your tendency to behave like a psycho whenever you get a bee in your bonnet because someone's opinion has threatened your mental equilibrium. So if you choose to start on me like you have on others, I will not even read your insults. These are your issues not mine.
You don't know anything about me, this is just a message board. I forbid you from ever reading my posts again, if I catch you reading my posts I will tell Dave on you.
tt/lsmft |
| tennis tom |
Posted - 12/01/2013 : 15:21:47
You folks are aware that there is another TMS site The TMS Wiki that has a "support" forum:
http://www.tmswiki.org/forum/threads/welcome-to-the-support-forum.554/ |
| Busted |
Posted - 12/01/2013 : 15:10:34
Just jumping in here to say I'm so sorry about your prognosis Susan. Last year I was diagnosed with breast cancer, thankfully it was caught early and I am now cancer-free. But then 3 months ago I tested positive for the BRCA gene. I had a hysterectomy 6 weeks ago as prevention for both ovarian & breast cancer. So in a way I can relate. Although I have a genetic disposition, in re-reading Mindbody Prescription, I have started to wonder if all of my stress & anxiety caused my cancer to come to the surface. I remember the first time I read that book and saw the section on cancer, I worried/wondered if symptom imperative would take me there. And it did. I've chased TMS around my body for years now - back pain, carpal tunnel, plantar faciitis. Maybe I chased it around so much cancer was the only thing left. Scary. I have been in psychotherapy for the past 1.5 years, but it has done nothing to help. Then again, I don't think my therapist was very good. I just left her and will try to find someone else who can hopefully help decrease my reservoir of rage. |
| plum |
Posted - 12/01/2013 : 12:04:52
Susan, I offer my unreserved apologies if this thread is distressing you. In truth I see that it must be and I plead extenuating circumstances. Maybe if these assumptions had been aired long ago many would be spared the circumstances in which they find themselves. In recognition of RSR's mindfulness if you want us to stop or move to a fresh thread, please say so either here or by email and it will be honoured.
In respect of this I beg everyone pay heed to these words of John Sarno:
"Patients often ask me, “Do you want me to start being nasty?” and I say, “No.” I simply want them to understand that the drive to be perfect angers the unconscious".
This comes via Day 24 of The Structured Educational Program on the tms wiki.
Here is the link: http://www.tmswiki.org/ppd/Educational_Program_Day_24
And the link to the article in Pain Medicine News referenced (you will need to sign up but they do not harass you);
http://m.painmedicinenews.com/Article.aspx?d=Web+Exclusives&d_id=244&i=November+2010&i_id=678&a_id=16258
Let us not descend into being nasty. It is naïve in the extreme to pretend that people are not swayed by what they read here, particularly when it is repeatedly stated that one must accept an all or nothing belief in tms to heal.
alix, I do understand but am saddened that you leave. I value your spirit and words. You healed and you broke from the orthodoxy. Perhaps that is statement enough.
chickenbone, I am happy to trust your husband's judgement. His experience has weight and your voice has punch. It tells me you think for yourself. Also I note you healed once you broke the faith.
Today's orthodoxy is tomorrow's refusal. |
| alix |
Posted - 12/01/2013 : 11:11:29
quote:
Originally posted by tennis tom
That's a broad generalization that I don't see at this site, if anything many here are hypochodriacs running to doctors at the least little sign. When my urine turned red I didn't say "Oh, it's only TMS I'll think it away." I immediately went to the ER and it was found to be a kidney stone and I got morphine <snip>
tom, you are trivializing the discussion. There is a significant gap between overdosing foolishly on NSAIDs and what I was trying to convey.
But tom, your posts are becoming quite abusive so I will leave the conversation. |
| chickenbone |
Posted - 12/01/2013 : 10:49:30
Tom, it is clearly untrue what you have to say about hypochondriacs. That was the way old school medicine used to think about them. We now know that hypochondriacs don't really want to be sick, this is just how their unconscious anxiety/fear gets expressed - in physical rather than psychological ways. And they certainly don't do it for gain. It is also true that there are orders of magnitude more hypochondriacs who are deeply into self-help than those who are sitting in doctor's waiting rooms. TMS's are hypochondriacs, but not all hypochondriacs are into TMS. Normal people do not think and talk about symptoms all the time and what causes them. They are well aware that their bodies sometimes have little quirks, but they do not dwell on them, turning them into full blown symptoms. I for one am well aware of the differences between my mental processes and those of normal others.
I can also say that in my own experience, most, probably 80% of people I know who died from or have cancer are extremely happy, well-adjusted people who have everything to live for. My husband believes strongly in TMS, but does not think TMS is a always a major factor in cancer.
I also think we are all very different when it tomes to our individual physical and emotional makeup. For instance, some people have an extremely high tolerance for sugar - I could eat tuns of sugar and my blood sugar won't even move, but someone else eats a little and their blood sugar goes through the roof. The same thing applies mentally, some have a huge tolerance for emotional upset, it even seems to make them stronger, while others are prone to become ill with just a little.
Tom, I am well aware of your anger management problems and your tendency to behave like a psycho whenever you get a bee in your bonnet because someone's opinion has threatened your mental equilibrium. So if you choose to start on me like you have on others, I will not even read your insults. These are your issues not mine. |
| tennis tom |
Posted - 12/01/2013 : 08:25:27
quote:
Originally posted by chickenbone
I think the idea of TMS is extremely seductive for a lot of hypochondriacs. It allows them to believe that all of their pain and ills are mind related and don't need to be attended to.
...My husband, who treated cancer for most of his life, does not think that cancer strikes particular types of personalities.
...I am not so sure that Dr. Sarno really thought that cancer was a form of TMS, because I remember him saying that TMS was basically harmless.
A true hypochondriac would NOT even bother reading a Sarno book, they WANT to believe they have a physical problem for primary and secondary gains. They wouldn't be at a book store in the Self Help section looking for complementary cures, they would be firmly implanted in the doctor's waiting room reading a Vogue or National Enquierer. If they bothered even looking at the cover of the book, they would immediately put it back, "No way it's in my head, my problems are real physical." If a kindly person gave them a Sarno book, their first and last reaction on opening and reading a page would be like SteveO's, they would "Say rubbish" and throw it across the room. (SteveO did pick it up again, a true hypochondriac would burn it).
Of course your husband doesn't think personality has any baring on getting cancer, if he did he would have been a very lonely man at the hospital. Dr. Sarno was, a pariah amongst his peers, thought of as a whack for thinking for himself, seeing with his own eyes, daring to say what his colleagues would fear to say, a true pioneer.
You are confusing what Dr. Sarno said about muscle, tendon, and ligament pain being harmless, in his earlier works about backs, etc. He does not say all MINDBODY dis-ease is harmless. KNOWLEDGE progresses, read the Good Doctor's two later books to more fully understand the nature of PSYCHOSOMATIC dis-ease. Even when an idea is out in the latest book, if the knowledge is worth anything, it is out of date because intelligent people are making use of it to advance knowledge even further.
|
| RageSootheRatio |
Posted - 11/30/2013 : 19:24:36
Susan, I hope you are OK with this thread. Please let us know if not. I continue to send you best wishes for your healing and recovery.
I have hesitated to post back onto this thread, but this is some of what Dr Sarno himself said about TMS and cancer in his 2007 book, The Divided Mind:
Over the last 32 exciting and fruitful years, my colleagues and I have learned much. I've published three books to describe our work, our discoveries, and our successes. Those dealt largely with what I called the tension myositis syndrome (TMS), a painful psychosomatic disorder afflicting millions. The Divided Mind will deal with the full range of psychosomatic disorders, a far broader and more important subject. Psychosomatic disorders fall into two categories:
1. Those disorders that are directly induced by unconscious emotions, such as the pain problems (TMS) and common gastrointestinal conditions including reflux, ulcers, irritable bowel syndrome, skin disorders, allergies, and many others.
2. Those disease in which unconscious emotions may play a role in causation, but are not the only factor. They include autoimmune disorders like rheumatoid arthritis, certain cardiovascular conditions and cancer.
Clearly, Dr Sarno made the distinction between "TMS" and diseases such as cancer. So to use the words "TMS" and "mindbody syndrome" interchangeably is, I believe, part of what is causing confusion and dissent.
~RSR |
|
|
