| T O P I C R E V I E W |
| yogaluz |
Posted - 11/03/2013 : 10:42:49
I had to share with my fellow TMSers an encounter I had yesterday that left me feeling... confused I suppose.
I am now living in Hawaii and one of the greatest things about being here is being able to swim outside, pool or ocean, year round. Now that I've been swimming laps at my local pool for a few months, I've gotten to know the long-course crowd. Many of them are in their late 50's, early 60's and many also have quite a few physical ailments but are there every day. Most of them swim faster and longer than I do.
One of the regulars was back yesterday after being away for a couple of months. I asked her how she was doing and she said: "Great! This is my first time back in the water since my transplant!" She then proceeded to tell me about her knee transplant (not replacement). She went to the Mayo Clinic because after 3 failed knee replacements, the only option open to her was a transplant using a donor bone and cadaver parts. The procedure involved cutting her femur off mid-thigh and bolting the donor bone to hers complete with knee parts and then using cadaver ligaments and such to support the knee.
It is now 2 months later and she's off all medication and swimming laps and will soon start her ocean swims. She is in NO PAIN.
I thought about her a great deal yesterday and at first I was inspired by her story and it was obvious from talking with her that she had an indomitable spirit which no doubt contributed to her healing.
But as the day wore on I just became more and more disheartened by my condition. Currently, I am in constant pain in many of my joints. My left elbow is particularly bad and is limiting my ability to paddle and do other activities I want to do. I'm anxious and mildly depressed and am having difficulty making decisions. I have a tremor in my left index finger and yesterday was jittery and shaking all day.
So despite my efforts to Sarnoize myself, do my affirmations, exercise through the pain, take anti-depressants to help with my mood, etc. etc., I still suffer from this bloody condition whereas transplant lady just gallops through life.
I understand how misguided it is to compare oneself against others but sometimes I really just feel like I suck and I'm going live this way forever and then die. In pain. The end.
p.s. Sorry to be such a downer but I'm hoping you all get my drift.
pain is inevitable, suffering optional |
| 9 L A T E S T R E P L I E S (Newest First) |
| njoy |
Posted - 11/19/2013 : 15:51:34
yogaluz, I have been learning how to manage the mailing list (poor Forest, he's so patient) and will see if you are already on digest (one email daily). if not, will do that.
I hope you are doing okay way out there in glorious Hawaii. Here's a photo (taken a couple of days ago) of my woodshed and satellite I-net connection: http://www.flickr.com/photos/44652461@N00/10952091866/
I love it here, but would probably love Hawaii, more!
NewAdventure, thanks so much for drawing out attention to your friend Pete Gerlach. I will let people on the mailing list know about him. Yay, parts! |
| NextAdventure |
Posted - 11/19/2013 : 04:49:24
Yes Pete Gerlach - a very wise and special man. and one of the best therapists I know.
You can reach Pete at PILGRIM27@AOL.COM |
| Birdie78 |
Posted - 11/18/2013 : 12:16:39
Next Adventure, are you talking about Peter Gerlach? A few weeks ago I purchased his book "who is really running your life" and I LOVE it!!!
Kind regards from Germany sends Birdie |
| NextAdventure |
Posted - 11/18/2013 : 04:33:54
I have a colleague friend who is a famous parts therapist and has produced over 100 free videos and does phone work at very low prices.
After being a therapist for over 40 years when I learned parts work it brought a whole new dimension of ways to access depth issues.
It anyone would like Pete's contact info email me. He is booked very tight and spends a lot of time on his own self care so his openings are limited.
He is one of the best general and parts therapist I know. |
| njoy |
Posted - 11/16/2013 : 18:58:58
I'll ask about that, yogaluz. There's a digest which helps a lot. I know it can come daily and perhaps weekly as well. Another thing busy people do is direct all partstherapy emails to a folder then just look in that folder when they have time and feel like it.
Still, it would be great to be able to "subscribe" to a thread and not to all the ones that you are less interested in. I don't have a clue how to do that -- I find getting a digest confusing and prefer to get an email every time someone posts. But that's just me. I have learned so much thus far and am afraid to miss a thing!
With luck, someone will have an answer.
*****
"It's worth considering that tms is not a treatment but rather an unfolding of the self, and a way of living as an emotionally aware and engaged soul." Plum
PARTS THERAPY
I have been studying and using Internal Family Systems (IFS) therapy for several months now and have found it most helpful in digging out what is really going on with me to cause tms symptoms.
Over at tmswiki.org there is a NEW mailing list for those who want to try using IFS for TMS. I hope you will check it out. The conversations are already going strong and unsubscribing is one click if you don't like it.
You can find a form to sign up here:
http://www.tmswiki.org/forum/threads/mailing-list-for-parts-therapy-tms.2868/
Learning to use IFS therapy for self help is pretty easy, as these things go. There is a lot of info available on youtube.com and various other web sites. If you search "Internal Family Systems", you'll find it. My recommendation for a book is Self Therapy by Jay Earley which costs less than $ 10 on Kindle (also available in paperback at amazon.com). It is well written and introduces all the basics.
Forums are a wonderful way to find support (I've loved tmshelp.com for many years)and to learn all the possibilities that have helped others in their recovery. The mailing list is specifically about parts therapy and good for connecting in a somewhat more private way. A CALL IN phone discussion is also in the works.
Finally, best wishes to tms-ers everywhere, especially those who are still struggling with symptoms. May we all find peace and comfort.
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| yogaluz |
Posted - 11/16/2013 : 11:44:47
Hi njoy,
I would like to learn more about Parts Therapy and I joined the group but was receiving too many emails. Is there a way to receive emails only for the discussions you're a part of?
I'm seeking whatever help I can at the moment because my joint condition is becoming so painful, it's making me nauseous.
Thanks for your support!
pain is inevitable, suffering optional |
| njoy |
Posted - 11/05/2013 : 22:10:03
If the problem is tms it may pop up elsewhere, as many of us know too well, and surgery is notorious for its placebo effect. In this case, a knee transplant (wow!) tells the brain the problem is over and that's such a powerful placebo. If her problem was truly physical and there is no "symptom imperative" at work (as SteveO puts it), the results will be good.
If not, knowing her pool side may give you an opportunity to recommend Dr. Sarno's book.
Yogaluz, I hope you work this through and feel better fast. Otherwise, you might consider learning about parts therapy (see signature, below for a link). I probably sound like a broken record (wah, wah, wah  ) but It has changed the world for me.
*****
"It's worth considering that tms is not a treatment but rather an unfolding of the self, and a way of living as an emotionally aware and engaged soul." Plum
PLEASE READ!
I have been studying and using Internal Family Systems (IFS) therapy for several months now and have found it most helpful in digging out what is really going on with me to cause tms symptoms.
Over at tmswiki.org there is NOW a mailing list for those who want to try using IFS for TMS. I hope you will try it out. The conversations are already going strong. You can find a form to sign up here:
http://www.tmswiki.org/forum/threads/mailing-list-for-parts-therapy-tms.2868/
Learning to use the IFS therapy for self help is pretty easy, as these things go. There is a lot of info available on youtube.com and various other web sites. If you search "Internal Family Systems", you'll find it. My recommendation for a book is Self Therapy by Jay Earley which costs less than $ 10 on Kindle (also available in paperback at amazon.com). It's thorough and clearly written.
The mailing list and sub-forum are great ways for us to support each other as we look at how IFS and other parts therapies can help. The mailing list is especially good for connecting in a considerably more private way. I have felt more comfortable telling my stories of success and failure there than on the open Internet.
Finally, best wishes to all tms-ers, especially those who are still struggling with symptoms. May we all find peace and comfort.
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| yogaluz |
Posted - 11/05/2013 : 18:06:28
Thanks Andy,
I appreciate your reply. It's lonely out here on the island  .
I hear what you're saying and I do tend to swing back and forth, jumping to the possibility of a physical ailment despite my success at healing back pain and a host of other symptoms. And yes, despite living under sunny skies and near my beloved ocean, I still have much going on emotionally. My family dynamic is very intense right now and our home is not peaceful. There's continued tension in my marriage and I have two, very high octane teenage daughters.
Funny you suggest spending time with transplant lady (sorry, I forgot her name). Not only does she have an indomitable spirit, she's sort of a force of nature and rather kooky so I'm not sure I'll hang with her other than at the pool but I do have a couple of friends that inspire me in that way. They just sort of plow through life with few cares in the world and when I'm with them, I pick a bit of that up myself.
Again, thanks for your kind words and for taking the time to look into my background and posts. It means a lot and I truly don't know what I would do without this forum.
Aloha nui!
pain is inevitable, suffering optional |
| andy64tms |
Posted - 11/05/2013 : 15:04:39
Hi Yogaluz,
I hate to see a thread disappear with zero answers. So you are in Hawaii (paradise) watching a 50 year old recover from a serious knee surgery with ease. This is while you suffer and get disheartened.
The obvious statement is: “Don’t compare”, as you are totally different from her, you have a completely different background and ailment. The only good comparison you should make is: “How does she do it.” I would befriend her, be with her as much as possible, her indomitable spirit and knowledge will be imparted over to you, for I am a firm believer of you become part of your surroundings.
If you find yourself a little jealous or envious, make a joke about this with her and flatter her abilities. It’s not completely misguided for us to compare, we do this all the time, its part of our human condition and competitiveness.
I read you have experienced TMS success before, so you know how it works, but I fear from this and other posts you are too focused with the physical, your symptoms your pain and not thinking psychologically.
May I refer you back to your own words about your emotions on the attached thread in the paragraph that reads? “On the emotional side of things…
http://www.tmshelp.com/forum/topic.asp?TOPIC_ID=6132
This is where you need to be.
I know very little about anxiety and anti depressants, but two names come to mind Claire Weeks and Dr. Alexander.
So don't compare and don't despair
I wish you happiness under the balmy palm trees.
Andy
Past TMS Experience in 2000, with success.
Charlie Horse on neck for 20 years, is almost gone.
Books:
Healing Back Pain
Unlearn your Pain
The Great Pain Deception |
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