| T O P I C R E V I E W |
| marytabby |
Posted - 03/30/2005 : 11:33:27
Hello everyone,
My name is Mary, 39 years old and I live in Boston. Based on my current state of health, you may think I am 80 instead of 39. Background on me: very active, very healthy, ran 2-3 miles four or five times a week, toned with weights 2 times a week, a very in shape person. I bought the MindBody Prescription book last week and am in my second reading of it. The reason I bought it is because for 6 years, I've been suffering with debilitating trapezius/scapula/neck pain with no real physical explanations from docs. I had an MRI done in Feb this year and it showed "normal" degenerative changes of the upper and lower spine, as well as a disc protrusion at L4-L5 area. This protrusion made sense to me because after running rigorously on the treadmill Xmas eve, my lower back went completely out Xmas day; couldn't walk for almost a month. Haven't been the same since. I have not run since Xmas even and now I walk the treadmill. My MRI showed spinal stenosis of lower back (which they say is why my left buttock always aches) and mild degenerative changes in cervical area as well as lower back. I even developed either "carpal" or DeQuervain's tendonitis in both wrists simultaneously to all of this lower back stuff coming on at Christmas. I have been to every doctor you can imagine, chiro, PT, rheumatologist, ortho surgeon, hand surgeon, massage therapists, hair analyst who prescribed herbal supplements, and now I see the chiropractor to the New England Patriots, figuring he's the best, who wholly believes it's all muscle-skeletal related problem that he is sure he can fix. I notice the pain will come on at times when I'm very worried about something, so the TMS self diagnosis makes sense. However, there are times when I will be feeling pretty good, in good spirits, and I will simply be reaching gently for the shampoo in the shower and BANG! The whole upper back goes into spasm and I cannot tilt, turn, move my neck for 3-4 days and I'm in agony bawling my eyes out in excrutiating pain. PT and chiro never seem to help much. Do I sound like a TMS sufferer to you so far? I have an appt. set up for biofeedback sessions and I also set up an appt to see a therapist. I have no idea what is wrong with me but the book seems to have been written with ME in mind. I feel like now I'm obsessing on this TMS stuff. Seems like that type of obsessing in itself must not be good for me either (being online all the time looking for answers, etc)? I don't know, I'm new to this. Thanks for letting me introduce myself. |
| 15 L A T E S T R E P L I E S (Newest First) |
| marytabby |
Posted - 04/01/2005 : 05:36:45
Thanks, I do have an appt. with Dr. Martinez for late April, which is the soonest he can see me. I appreciate the feedback. Colleen, keep us posted on how it's going. |
| smth416 |
Posted - 03/31/2005 : 21:32:33
Mary
Seeing a TMS doctor certainly helped me solidify the TMS diagnosis. For some people reading the books is not enough for it to sink in. Some need a MD to test you for the disorder and tell you exactly why you fit the TMS diagnosis (and you seem to fit perfectly) Good Luck -Al |
| Colleen |
Posted - 03/31/2005 : 18:10:43
I meant to thank MikeC and others who suggested I see Dr. Matinez. Thank You.
Colleen |
| Colleen |
Posted - 03/31/2005 : 18:09:01
Dear Mary,
I had my first appt. with Dr. Martinez today and I really liked him and what he had to say. He said because I was initially diagnosed wrong and numerous Drs. added to that diagnosis over the past year,(neuropathy) I have a bit of work ahead of me. He assigned chapter 9 of Dr.Sarno's book, MBP everyday, morning and night and journaling as well. I see him again in a few weeks. He gave me an exam and then tried all the TMS trigger points....I had most of them. He invited another Dr. in who was interested in learning about TMS. My husband was there as well. This was my first time seeing a Doctor who believes in TMS.
Colleen |
| Caroline |
Posted - 03/31/2005 : 12:51:34
This is really funny, Maryalma. I read the exorcist when i was 12 years old and it traumatized the hell of me (the book was even worse than the movie)! I clearly remember being up all night for days after reading it. I finally went to my mom and asked whether it was possible for people to get possessed by the devil. Guess what she said? "yes!". It took me roughly 6 months to be able to sleep without the radio on. I kept thinking the noise would keep the demons away! |
| marytabby |
Posted - 03/31/2005 : 09:51:47
Fred, I do believe you are right. I am a "do gooder" by nature. I showed up in my best suit dressed to impress and BANG! Upper back attack. Regarding the Exorcist theme, I did read Albert's thread and Albert and everyone else, I think for me, the connection is that I was the exact age of the character Regan, who was possessed, when that movie came out and I was much too young to be seeing it. My older brothers snuck me in and I was 11 or so. NOT a good movie for a girl that age witnessing another 12 year old being possessed with that awful devil voice and her face all gashed up and eyes bulging out. Like Albert, I feared I may get a visit from someone like her demon and become like her. Remember I was 11, so the mind is quite impressionable at that age. Nonetheless, I grew up but always still had the memory of her demonic voice and face in my head. So my dream, which was very vivid, in fact it showed twin Regans in my dream. Wonder if I was the other twin? Meaning I was so obsessed as a kid that I'd be like her that it sat in my subconscience all these years and my dream showed twin Regans. Interesting stuff. |
| Fredarm57 |
Posted - 03/31/2005 : 07:15:27
My TMS pain tends to be job related. TMSer's tend to be "goodists", anxious to please. I'll bet you were generating huge amounts of unconscious anxiety starting that new job, wanting to do a good job and wondering how it would turn out. Fred |
| Baseball65 |
Posted - 03/31/2005 : 06:13:51
Hi Maryalma8
Oh,you're getting it alright.
Funny you should bring up that exorcist movie thing.Albert wrote extensively on that when he joined the board....at the time I didn't see any relation..maybe you/he have unearthed a vein on the Ol' TMS goldmine...
I never saw the movie then,and by the time I did,it was laughable based on the antiquity of the special effects(I worked in the film biz,so I'm a little cynical)
That TMS=New job thing happened to me as well..it's so obvious in retrospect,but at the time it was painful and terrifying.
As far as Christmas and the episode...sounds like you resent that sister at a profound level,even deeper than you might imagine.Couple that with a previous episode(conditioning) and the general expectation/drama/trauma around the holiday and it makes for a very merry TMS day.
I myself used to get ill for like 15 xmas' in a row until about four years ago.
you are at the right place and right on time!
peace
Baseball65 |
| marytabby |
Posted - 03/31/2005 : 06:00:59
Baseball65 and others,
Thanks for your repliesl to my post. Baseball, there was nothing going on at Christmas that I'm aware of but funny enough, my upper back went out two Christmases before this year, so I missed two Christmases with my family in three years. Kind of bizarre but telling. I wish I could put my finger on what may have triggered both times that it happened Christmas day but I just can't figure it out. My family gets along well (except for one neurotic and annoying sister in law who I can't stand). So maybe it's the sis in law I agonize seeing. She has fibromyalgia and is one of those people who loves to get attention and does not want to get well, where I DO want to get well and FAST!!! I do not play the victim. So I don't know, not sure what brings it on. Interestingly, I was pain free for six months, and then I started a new job in November, and LITERALLY THAT DAY of my new job, the upper back attacked me out of nowhere. I was feeling confident, happy about the new job I was entering into and since November on that first day of the new job I have been in chronic pain cycle that I am trying to break. So I do believe it's TMS and I do believe in the books. I am going to buy the HBP book today and start reading it promptly. The MBP book is also great. I got a lot ouf of it. I am noticing that since last week when I decided to accept this TMS approach, every night I am awaking with pretty disturbing dreams. Funny thing is they are all dreams about things or people which I am subconsciounsly sad about or example, last night I awoke with terrorizing nightmare of the Exorcist movie. I saw that movie way too young at the theatre and it horrified me all through my childhood, not in an obvious way but it disturbed me and now last night it came out in my dream, just as all this week, every night I am dreaming of things that are on my mind but are now just coming out. So it's like I feel I've given my brain the permission to "let it all flow", without even realizing it. I anticipate I'm going to be dreaming a lot more stuff. It just sucks that it wakes me up and I have trouble getting back to sleep. But other than that I take it as a good sign that I'm dreaming like this, because it probably means my subconscience and unconscience is beginning to emerge with the troubling emotions. Do I sound like I am getting it? Thanks for your support. And I will be posting regularly to share and learn.
Mary in Boston |
| molomaf |
Posted - 03/31/2005 : 05:52:05
Massachusetts here as well. I have seen Dr. Martinez and he is really a great guy. He is very friendly and it feels very comfortable to speak the same (TMS) language with a doctor.
Michele
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| diverlarry |
Posted - 03/31/2005 : 05:30:05
Mary
The first step is to see a TMS Doctor. My suggestion is to see DR Eugenio Martinez at New England Baptist. MikeC who posts here is seeing him now. You could ask him how its going for him. Maybe he could post his progress. I went to another doctor at NEB and was also told to read the books. This was a year ago and im basically pain free now. This was after 15 years of back/neck problems. There are a few of us here from MA. |
| Baseball65 |
Posted - 03/30/2005 : 21:23:33
Hi Maryalma8
From the description and story you've provided you sound like a classic TMSer.Virtually every symptom you've suffered so far has been had by most of the forum members....in fact,it is only the very frustrated and very hurt/in pain who seem to make it into our club.
I would agree with verdammt that "Healing Back pain" is a straighter easier to understand explanation of TMS and it's cure than "The mindbody prescription".
By the time MBP was released,I was already 100% cured of back,neck and shoulder pain.I have since had little adventures in carpal pain,thumb numbness,nausea and chronic respiratory problems,all addressed in MBP.
I do sometimes wonder if I would have "got it" if I read MBP first,as it was broader and covered so much more information than my little head could have processed.
I did want to add that the surgeon who performed my unsuccessful back surgery was the team doctor for the New York Knicks and gave me the same sort of reassurances(before he cut me)...
Credentials probably aid in a placebo cure,I'm sure,however even with all his signed pictures on the wall,My surgeon failed me utterly.To boost his stats,I was relegated to a chronic pain clinic....that way I wasn't his "failure".
It took some little unglamourous old man named Doctor John Sarno to cure me....a man I've never met.It cost 12 bucks and a few weeks of introspection and work to be completely pain free for years now.
I do distinctly remeber having the feeling of "Hey...this is ME on every page!"....and the healing began.
welcome..
you've qualified yourself with a lot of symptomology...you sound like one of us,and in your writing I sense the same sort of personality.
Tell us more about yourself
What was going on at christmas?
peace
Baseball65 |
| verdammt |
Posted - 03/30/2005 : 19:19:31
Welcome aboard, Mary! You've come to the right place. Lots of great people here. I'm a newbie, too.
Offhand, I'd say you're a classic TMS sufferer. It hit you at Xmas. That's no coincidence. Sarno calls it "Holiday Syndrome." I bet a lot of us are still recovering from Easter TMS.
I read "Healing Back Pain" to beat a lower back problem years ago. You might find it easier to read than "The Mindbody Prescription." Either way, it takes a bit of time for Sarno's message to sink in. Be patient and keep reading, a little at a time. IT WILL SINK IN! You're on the right track. |
| Colleen |
Posted - 03/30/2005 : 15:53:12
Hi Mary,
Welcome. I am from MA as well ! I have had a neuropathy in both feet for nearly one year now. The past 2 to 3 weeks, I have also been extrremely tired/stressed and cannot figure out why. I am only a few years older than you, but I too feel like I am 80!! I am going to see Dr. Martinez for the first time soon. I will let you know how that goes. There are a few of us from MA who post here.
Good luck and keep posting.
Colleen |
| Fredarm57 |
Posted - 03/30/2005 : 12:53:41
Mary: It sure sounds like it could be TMS. The multiple symptoms are a dead giveaway. The body just doesn't fall apart that quickly. I had similar symptoms plus knee pain before discovering Dr. Sarno in the early 1990's. I had tried all of the various doctors and treatments too and nothing worked. I have been relatively pain-free since then, other than two recurrances. You might get the book "Back Sense" by Dr. Ronald Siegel which builds on the work of Dr. Sarno and presents a practical program for overcoming the pain. If you want to see a doctor who is familiar with TMS, you could see Dr. Gino Martinez, who was featured recently on Channel 5. See the article on their web site: http://www.thebostonchannel.com/health/4315421/detail.html
His contact information is
Eugenio Martinez, MD
The Spine Center- New England Baptist Hospital Bone and Joint Institute
125 Parker Hill Avenue
Boston, MA 02120
emartine@caregroup.harvard.edu
(617) 754-5246
or
Eugenio Martinez, MD
Pro Sports Orthopedics
200 Providence Highway
Dedham, MA 02026
emartine@caregroup.harvard.edu
(781) 326-7108
(781) 326-5839 Fax
Personally I wouldn't bother with biofeedback. It's symptomatic treatment. You want to deal with the cause of the pain. Seeing a therapist is a good idea, but make sure that he or she is receptive to the idea of pyschologically-induced pain. Focus on what could be causing stress, anger or anxiety in your life. Try not to obsess or panic, which I all too well realize is easier said than done. Keep reading the books. Some people find journaling about their feelings helpful. Try not to get too wrapped up in trying to fix it. Do some things you enjoy and try to regain your life. I don't know what it is about the Boston area, but there are a lot of us on this board from around here. You're in good company. Keep posting and keep the faith! Fred |
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