| T O P I C R E V I E W |
| drh7900 |
Posted - 09/25/2012 : 19:11:51
Hey, all!
The last few weeks have been crazy busy for me and I haven't had any time to read here, but I had a realization yesterday that I really wanted to share. My pain has been nearly completely gone the last several days!
I've found (as we've all said and heard a million times) that the more I focus on my LIFE and less on my pain, the less my pain exists. In fact, lately I find that my pain mostly only exists when I realize I don't hurt and focus too much on the areas that were hurting before and wonder how long the relief will last.
A few days ago I even found that I was able to bend over a bit further at the waist (not bending knees) than I used to be able to! Of course, I then keep trying over and over and put too much attention on the spot where I expect pain and find the pain creeping back.
It's a vicious cycle, but I'm slowly winning!
I hope to catch up soon on all the activity I've missed in the last few weeks! I wish everyone the best!
--
Dustin |
| 10 L A T E S T R E P L I E S (Newest First) |
| SteveO |
Posted - 09/29/2012 : 18:58:19
One of the things people miss is how important perfectionism is in TMS. It took a long time to see what a great word it was Dr. Sarno used to describe the primary trait. People immediately relate to it. One problem is that people don't recognize it within themselves when they are actually highly perfectionistic. I spoke with hundreds of people, some who first denied being perfectionists, but after long discussion they suddenly realized they were. Things "bother" them.
They often seem to be lazy or care-free but this is their outer core. A big misunderstanding is in thinking they aren't perfectionists because they aren't perfectionists in everything, only those things that mean something to them. So they are most often procrastinators and lazy appearing when in fact they are not; they get so caught in wanting to do right, so much so, that they simply quit in frustration.
It is within this sudden realization that some have healed, or moved to a new level of healing and awareness. The outer "look" of the people means nothing, it's what they themselves feel that matters.
One way I learned these people were closet perfectionists is that they couldn't just let something stay the way it was; they had to respond, or answer replies that nagged them. In my book I used the example of the guy I spoke to who said he wasn't a perfectionist at all, he even laughed at the concept. But I kept speaking to him and he began to visibly shake as he realized he was a perfect chatter-minded thinker. Even though he appeared lazy to all of us, he couldn't stand it if one leaf blew back in his yard after raking. After he realized this his back pain faded as he moved from darkness to awareness.
It is the superego that fools us into thinking we are a certain way, when in fact we are something else. It develops around 5 years old or so, and is there to hide and protect us from further shame. Then throughout our lives we never know the truth, but the symptoms tell us there is conflict, a divided mind that we were unaware of.
My book was actually called A Divided Mind, and I had a Vitruvian man on my cover inside a human brain. The good doctor knocked that idea sideways when he published his book. But I knew I was thinking along the same lines as he was. I had to scramble to come up with a new idea for a cover.
Andy, many of the people I worked with were planners, designers, etc., people who had jobs that demanded control. I've recently been working with quite a few professional musicians, but they had recent deaths in their families. So we all live and hurt. It's how you handle emotional pain that makes the difference. People who demand that things "go right" hurt the most, because things rarely go right.
No lawn mowhawk anymore? Try painting a mustache on your wife while she's sleeping. That will open up the Id. Also a can of whoop-ass.
Steve
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| andy64tms |
Posted - 09/29/2012 : 18:10:33
Hi SteveO,
I am indeed controlled by my superego; I had a very hard time leaving a “mow hawk” strip across my front lawn. I did this to observe my reactions. On a conscious level I felt rather uncomfortable and even guilty at first. A second observation was that the “mow hawk” edges had to be parallel. I have problems, my poor wife!
My perfectionist lifestyle has been as you say “tightly controlled” like this for 45 years, so I am trying to understand this trait, and also because I am a mechanical designer, very disciplined and accurate. My work environment as of late was creative, but riddled with rules and restrictions-very repressive. I am now enjoying letting that naughty ID child have his own way for a change, its fun.
My situation is changing gradually, as I am now retired and away from those Sarno “years of responsibility”. It’s truly wonderful; my daily stress level is heading for zero as I dig into my “self” for answers.
Dustin, it’s OK, I have removed the “mow hawk” from my front lawn.
Thanks for your comments.
Andy
Past TMS Experience in 2000, with success.
Back on Wiki Edu Program day 12
Charlie Horse on neck for 20 years. (to be evicted later.)
Books:
Healing Back Pain
Unlearn your Pain
The Great Pain Deception |
| SteveO |
Posted - 09/28/2012 : 19:19:57
When I first began healing with the good doctor's work I started to become active again after a long time of atrophy. I also left a strange shape in my yard grow into what looked like a crop circle. I think it's the creative part of the self beginning to express, where it was once very controlled and chained by superego. TMS comes from the self-suppression of desired expression.
I heard the neighbors walking by one time, "What the hell does SteveO have going on here?" I grew it to about 2 feet above the rest of the grass. Then the mothership returned and landed there.
You will find you have a lot more to express once you're free from TMS. There will no longer be a tightly controlled individual, his persona unchained. You may even write your own book, or paint your mona lisa. Something has to change to heal and it begins with the true self shining through the layered self.
You may even start your own lawn sculpture business. Andy's Yard Design and Cockroach Killer, Inc. "You grow it, we mow it, aint a yardline we can't design." All competitors coupons dishonored.
Steve |
| andy64tms |
Posted - 09/28/2012 : 18:54:18
Hi Dustin,
Perhaps when Dustin has finished with SteveO’s lawn, he can come and work on mine. For last week I purposefully left a strip two feet wide diagonally across my front lawn. Does anyone understand my motive for doing this? Leaving this “mow hawk strip” had a purpose apart from annoying the neighbors, and having some fun.
Glad you are doing well Dustin.
Andy
Past TMS Experience in 2000, with success.
Back on Wiki Edu Program day 12
Charlie Horse on neck for 20 years. (to be evicted later.)
Books:
Healing Back Pain
Unlearn your Pain
The Great Pain Deception |
| SteveO |
Posted - 09/28/2012 : 14:02:21
It's elementary my dear Watson. But thanks for the kind words Eric. I do have a kinship with Dr. Sarno, he is me, only successful.
I just found out they're going to re-air my Sirius TMS interview along with Penny Marshall's interview next week, I think on Friday morning, not sure yet. They also invited me back for another TMS interview in Dec.
But the main question is still not answered, will Dustin mow my lawn now that he's not thinking about healing? Lawn mowing has a purpose. To make the grass shorter.
Steve
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| tcherie |
Posted - 09/28/2012 : 13:59:27
This post is shedding light on my issue, and why it has come back. Like I mentioned previously in my post, I had my dental work done over a year ago. I wasn't happy with it, but I knew about TMS and said I was fine, went on with my life and I became fine. Any strange feeling, I ignored and it passed.
When another tooth broke recently (and I still haven't gotten that tooth fixed yet), it caused me to focus back on what I had previously let go. The tooth broke during a high, high stress period at work. Therefore, the cycle started back again. Maybe focusing on my teeth was a way to deal with the stress at work. I don't know, but I feel like I would be able to deal better without it.
This forum really helps you to think things through. |
| eric watson |
Posted - 09/28/2012 : 13:47:51
steveo your post and your book has been the catalist of freedom for so many of us -your the man bro-thanks again for your contribution to this site and to revealing the truth.its like you and sarno have this bond .where he leaves off you pick up and complement each other.and again i have to say thank you .and i said this on purpose my friend.god bless |
| SteveO |
Posted - 09/28/2012 : 13:36:06
The Dustinator is back, and taking my advice on not thinking of healing. The pain fades when you go back to living, and placing your focus on a passion in life, or anywhere else. The pain serves as a purpose, so if you replace the pain with new purpose, it has no purpose. Is that enough purposes for you in one sentence? I did it on purpose.
When you expect pain you get pain. By expecting health problems you get those health problems. Preventative-care medicine is becoming more controversial the more we learn. We find what we seek, there was nothing to find before we sought.
Steve |
| Goodney |
Posted - 09/26/2012 : 13:23:14
I agree 100%. I will be pain free, and then when I start wondering when (not if) the pain will return, and begin stretching or twisting or tensing or testing the area -- BAM! -- there it is. Pain is not the issue. FEAR is the issue! |
| eric watson |
Posted - 09/25/2012 : 19:46:01
I've found (as we've all said and heard a million times) that the more I focus on my LIFE and less on my pain, the less my pain exists. In fact, lately I find that my pain mostly only exists when I realize I don't hurt and focus too much on the areas that were hurting before and wonder how long the relief will last...............Thanks drh7900 ...this is exactly how its working with me too...when i dont think about it ....its not there...then i catch myself not thinking about it and it trys to creep in...this is when i pull out my bag of tricks....i dont thik this can be mentioned enough-thanks for bringing it back to light...in 2002 it worked out this way and i was healed for ten yrs-i remember before it came back this time ..all i would do is think fear based thoughts of what if it comes back...and then it did...i know you have the answer....good luck and god bless |
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