| T O P I C R E V I E W |
| Monte |
Posted - 09/14/2012 : 07:51:43
#8203;In the last update we discussed communicating with the Pain-Distraction Strategy and Think Psychological, the 1st component of TMS.
In this update we will address the 2nd component ofTMS, one that is often misunderstood and the cause of much of the confusion and struggle in reversing or healing from TMS.
Denying Emotions - Avoiding Feelings - Repressed Emotional Energy - It's all the same.
I often state that Dr. Sarno's absolute genius was making us aware of TMS, the psychological cause for chronic physical pain syndromes. Another genius insight that gets overlooked was Dr.Sarno highlighting to us the Type A Personality Traits and the fact that most TMS people exhibit some, many or all of these traits. Like most people, identifying that I personally exhibited most of the Type A traits Dr. Sarno speaks of in TMS: Pleasing, Striving, Controlling, Perfecting, Overly SelfConscious, Worry - gave me confidence that I was experiencing TMS and acceptance that I had now found the solution to end the chronic pain cycle. The confidence and added acceptance of knowing this TMS–Personality trait correlation was huge in helping me to believe in TMS and being able to confidently address the pain/distraction strategy by Thinking Psychological.
But, is that it? Why did people with TMS also exhibit Type A Personality Traits? We ask this, however, is it really the right question to be asking!
What is the role of our thought and behavior patterns in TMS? Now this question can lead us down a new "aha" path! Apath that just might change how we treat and heal TMS.
For TMS purposes our thought and behavior patterns are doing two things:
1 - Generating Inner Tension - We understand this concept pretty easily.
2 - Repressing Emotions - This is the one we need to get our mind wrapped around, digest and understand!
When we engage in our dominant, chronic, habitual patterns of - Worry, Controlling, Pleasing, Perfecting, Striving, Out-bursting, Overly Self-Conscious, Future/Past Thinking - we are Repressing our Emotions!
Our mind and our patterns of thinking/behaviors are Repressing Agents. This is how we repress emotional energy. This is how we avoid being with an emotion. Instead of being with an emotion and experiencing or allowing this emotion to be, we repress it! We repress it because we ignore it and denyit by engaging in our chronic, habitual thought and behavior patterns that are more comfortable for us. This is the big, huge repression of emotions that most TMS people actively and non-consciously engage in on a daily basis. And most likely we have been engaging in these patterns for the past 10, 20, 30 years or more! Do you think that this daily, chronic repression might lead to a nervous system providing us some daily chronic pain?
Dr. Sarno went down the Deeply Repressed Emotions path. Deeply Repressed Rage was his theory of repressed emotions in TMS. This applies to some people but it didn't for me. I still had TMS pain but not deeply repressed emotions! I discovered that most TMS sufferers I spoke with had similar experiences. They either didn't have deeply repressed rage or they did and they dealt with it but now they are still stuck in some cycle of TMS symptoms!
Why does this happen? Because on a daily basis they still repress emotional energy. They go into the habitual patterns of thinking (Type APatterns) and instead of being with or experiencing an emotion they are in their mind and patterns of thought/behavior that are allowing and enabling them to avoid the emotion.
I have been beating this drum of day-to-day repression since 2001. Reason being, it applies to most people who are struggling with TMS!! This leads us to the topic of this update – Sitting with your Emotions. The Sitting with Emotions practice is how we reverse the consequences (TMS Symptoms) of day-to-day repression of emotions.
Even though TMS is a Mind-Body Syndrome, and Think Psychological is a term we all know, the mind CANNOT dissipate emotional energy. The mind cannot experience an emotion or feeling. Our minds generate inner tension and they allow us to avoid, deny or repress feelings but our mind doesn't experience feelings or dissipate the repressed emotional energy!
How do we sit with and be with our emotions? First, understand, most of us don’t know how to be with our emotions because we don’t want to experience any discomfort. Yet our emotional pain, anger and fear are the most transformational opportunities that are presented to us!
Sitting With Emotions
First, we choose to be with whatever we are feeling emotionally (forget the physical TMS pain or symptom) and we shut-off our voices. This means we don't question, investigate or justify why we feel this way. Instead we make the choice to genuinely be with our anxiousness, boredom, sadness, anger, frustration, guilt, resentment, worry, etc. There is no need to identify a feeling or emotion. This requires we think and question and gives us a way to avoid just being with the feeling. One of the powerful subtleties to this practice is that you just have to sit and be with your emotion and be nowhere else. No mind, no voices. You don’t have to analyze or comprehend anything. In the beginning, this will most likely be uncomfortable, so our work here is to be with the feeling and the uncomfortable-ness. Most of our life we try to make ourselves comfortable and if life’s not comfortable we try and fix it. We are not going to do that here. We are simply being present with an emotion. We don't have to name it or identify it. We use our breath to keep us present, we stop the voices trying to distract us, if they come we dismiss them, if we feel uncomfortable we stay there with that feeling.
How long do I do this? Stay with the feeling and be with the uncomfortable-ness until you experience or feel a shift in your body.You will notice the tension or intensity of the emotion has dissipated and theuncomfortable-ness has lessened significantly. You will also notice that the compulsion or the intensity to revert back into your dominant Type A pattern, which is causing most of your TMS problems, has also dissipated. This is a significant side benefit to this practice. You not only dissipate the stored emotional energy that has been creating inner tension but you also dissipate the cause of all of this!
When do I do this? Ideally it is a spontaneous choice that you make when you check in with yourself as a part of Think Psychological. You may recognize that you are in one of your Type A Patterns and you ask yourself what/how am I feeling. If there is a feeling present: anxiousness, sadness, frustration, anger, guilt, resentment, worry, anxiety. Or maybe something is there but you can't name it, which is fine. You call time-out and choose to be with the emotion. This is the challenging part. Making the choice to be with the emotion and nowhere else. No email or phone call is more important right now, no household chore, errand or other personal agenda item is as important as right now in the moment to make the choice and be with your emotion. Your mind, the repressing or distraction agent will be very creative and persuasive in coming up with ideas to help you avoid being with your emotion! Dismiss these ideas, quiet these voices and choose to remain with your emotion.
If it really is impossible because of your surroundings then the next best option is to journal about it later and when the feeling comes back as you are journaling about it, call time-out and be with the emotion.
1. Have it your intention to be mindful of your emotions. Be genuinely interested in how you are feeling.
2. Acknowledge to yourself how you are feeling. I feel and state how you feel. It could be angry, sad, lonely, depressed, bored, frustrated, anxious, scattered, or guilty. Do not allow yourself off the hook by saying I don't know what I feel. This isn’t about naming or identifying an emotion it is about being with what you feel. It is about allowing your emotional energy to be experienced!
3. Be present with whatever you are feeling. Take a few deep mindful breaths and stay out of thinking and be with whatever feeling is present within you.
4. As you are being with your feeling, resist the urge to avoid or deny it. It is going to come as a thought like: I don'thave time do this right now, I need to get back to work, or I think I will search on the internet, or I think I will call a friend or I think I will get something to eat, or I think I will read about this again and then try it tonight. These voices are trying to sabotage you so recognize this and dismiss them. This is the uncomfortable part of this practice. Be with the feeling and be with the uncomfortable-ness and do not allow yourself to slip away into thought.
5. As you stay with the emotion, whatever feeling is there, keep breathing into it and being present with it. Avoid the need to analyze it, judge it, find blame or negotiate with it. Stop any of the reasoning stuff and be with your feeling.
6. That's it. When the uncomfortable-ness is gone you are done. A final suggestion to help make this effective and efficient. Don't look for the payoff or reward. No agenda and no timeframe. When you let go of any expectation and incorporate this practice as a genuine way of being open and allowing with your emotions you will experience positive progress and the transformation has begun!
Repressed emotional energy is the main ingredient causing inner tension in TMS. Sitting with Emotions is one of the most transformative practices in effectively releasing repressed emotional energy. This mindful practice requires we be in the present moment.
Your healing power is in the Now and your ability to heal from and reverse TMS is greatly enhanced in the present moment.
Stay the Course,
Monte Hueftle
TMS Mind-Body Coach
www.runningpain.com
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| 4 L A T E S T R E P L I E S (Newest First) |
| Ace1 |
Posted - 09/15/2012 : 19:02:39
Ok great question eric. If you had a bad emotion what would happen to the tension level if you TRIED to change it or force it into a good one? You would create more tension that way. You you actually have to accept it for the time being and recognize it and do not add any more fuel to the fire. Then at that point you can use he affirmations to the opposite effect without expectations or force. Remember that the positive affirmations are to cause a change in your uconscious thinking not in the present situation per se. Also saying an affirmation has an added bonus of changing your thinking to turn to the present moment. It's hard to think of past or future when you are constantly saying an affirmation. |
| Birdie78 |
Posted - 09/15/2012 : 04:19:16
quote:
Although this does sound like something to add to our bag of tricks -it also sounds like the perfect storm for a nervous breakdoun-on one hand were taught to affirm with good thoughts- r u telling us to look at the uglyist emotion and embrace it?
That's all but mindful meditation what monte was descibing in this article (please correct me if I am false). I guess that doesn't mean to focus pemamently of the negative sides of life; it simply means to allow us to be with our negative feelings and not ("knee-jerk-like"...oh I love this language barrier) wanting to get rid of them(by ignoring, repressing and so on). Awareness of negative feelings - as I understood Monte - is able to prevent these negative and tension-generating feelings that cause TMS-symptoms.
Of course it's important to affirm with good thoughts. I understand this concept theoretically but find it difficult to apply it to my daily routine. Think it's a question of practice.
Kind regards from Germay sends Birdie |
| eric watson |
Posted - 09/15/2012 : 00:25:38
Although this does sound like something to add to our bag of tricks -it also sounds like the perfect storm for a nervous breakdoun-on one hand were taught to affirm with good thoughts- r u telling us to look at the uglyist emotion and embrace it? |
| SteveO |
Posted - 09/14/2012 : 15:27:33
Interesting,
But it must be noted, they are not Type A people; only beguilingly crossing at small points with one another. They are in fact, very different, and pain sufferers exhibit very different types of health problems, the main one; cardiovascular disease. Heart problems are much lower in the Type T people, which are the TMS sufferers.
"Another genius insight that gets overlooked was Dr. Sarno highlighting to us the Type A Personality Traits and the fact that most TMS people exhibit some..." Monte
"Because of their tendency to be compulsive, perfectionist, and very responsible and conscientious, people with TMS often describe themselves as Type A. They are, in fact, different in some important respects." John E. Sarno, Healing Back Pain, pg. 151.
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