| T O P I C R E V I E W |
| shawnsmith |
Posted - 04/24/2012 : 14:29:08
On the TMS Wiki I read the following advice: "Think of a person in your life from whom you hide your emotions. What is preventing you from telling this person how you feel?"
That is an interesting topic which I never really gave much thought to. For certain, I don't share all of my feelings or emotions with my spouce, family or friends nor do I plan to any time in the future. What is preventing me from sharing is something I feel I need to think on and even journal about today. Are those emotions embarrassing, threatening, painful or uncomfortable in some way? Is there guilt, anger, jealousy or resentment at play? I want to reflect on this and examine those things I know about myself that I don't want my spouce, family or friends to know about. |
| 4 L A T E S T R E P L I E S (Newest First) |
| Wavy Soul |
Posted - 04/24/2012 : 22:14:17
Yeah - there was a big wave of people "sharing their truth" with each other, especially here in California. Unfortunately, it creates trauma for other people, because often what you're sharing is actually a big backlog of your whole life's unresolved rage etc., projected on someone you're in relationship with now.
So the trick is to get safe places to share and even express what you really feel in a way that gets it out of your mind and body without putting it in someone else's. Journaling and therapy, for example. Sometimes even sharing here.
Love is the answer, whatever the question |
| shawnsmith |
Posted - 04/24/2012 : 18:46:11
That's a wise piece of advice, Art. My focus is asking myself the question what is preventing me from sharing my emotions regardless of whether I share them or not? In other words, instead of focusing on the wisdom behind not sharing, I ask myself the question why don't I share in the first place?
Marsha, it's a good beginning for you to admit that you never reveal real feelings even to yourself. Why do you think that is so? Is it because you may be too afraid of what you might discover? Or is it something in your past -- long buried -- that you no longer wish to think about. I don't know and you will have to answer that question. |
| marsha |
Posted - 04/24/2012 : 17:48:16
I never reveal my real feelings. Not even to myself.
Alas, there is the real problem.
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| art |
Posted - 04/24/2012 : 16:27:55
There's a wise old 12 step saying to the effect that "we're only as sick as our secrets."
That said, there are often good reasons not to spill our guts at every opportunity, first and foremost in order that we don't hurt anyone.
Ask yourself, concerning "secret" thoughts and feelings, what is to be gained by sharing, and what's to be lost? I'm 61 now, and have painfully learned over the years that sometimes the wisest, strongest, healthiest, and most compassionate thing is to resist the temptation to unload, especially if t involves confessing something that will cause pain.
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